


Echoes and Reflections

by MistressMistrust



Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms, The Walking Dead (TV), daryl dixon - Fandom
Genre: Adopted Sibling Relationship, Character Death, Eventual Romance, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Love and Loss, Mild Smut, Not Canon Compliant, Romance, Sisters, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Starting Over, Strong Female Characters, Violence, follow up to a previous work
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-26
Updated: 2019-04-04
Packaged: 2019-08-08 01:44:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 24
Words: 174,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16420058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MistressMistrust/pseuds/MistressMistrust
Summary: One is distrustful, apprehensive and wary. Yet she has a fire in her that she only allows the very few to see. The other is social, loud and adventurous with a positive outlook that others envy. When a new group walks through the gates of Alexandria, it’s just another day for one of them, for the other it’s the beginning of a new chapter.But the past has a way of catching up to us and weighing down on our deepest and darkest moments. For all the people that were lost and all the attempts at moving on, there is only so much strength that we can spare. Is there such a thing as a second chance at something so great as love? Is it ever really as real as that first time?To him, she is an echo of what once was. A reflection of a life long since passed. One that he doesn’t want to let go of and holds in his weary heart.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my fourth Daryl Dixon Fanfic! I am a romance writer so generally steer away from canon and have done with this. It had elements of the show and even some outright quotes but other than that it is centered purely around character relationships. I love creating OC's so I hope you like these two new ones. As some of my regular readers know, I am an absolute sucker for a bit of fluff so expect lots of that but not right away. I wanted to challenge myself with another slow burn which is both a blessing and a curse to write!  
> I've tagged characters but tags will be added/removed as I go along if I don't have enough content for them or if I decide to give them a bigger role  
> **Be warned** - This is set after my other Fic 'The Angel and the Phoenix' and contains a Major Character Death. However, it can also be read as a stand alone story. You do not have to read both for it to make sense.   
> I create my stories as I post so I never have a finished work waiting to be posted on a schedule. I have a busy life so I update as and when I can. This also gives me the freedom to steer the storylines in different directions if I pick up on an idea that could work well.  
> I always appreciate feedback, I find comments and kudos very motivating and I cannot even begin to explain how grateful I am that people take the time out of their day to comment, even if it's just a '<3". Please be mindful that I am not a professional so I do make mistakes. My English isn't the best and I write because I enjoy it and choose to share it for free. So, any offensive or blunt comments won't be approved.

Echoes and Reflections

 

As the gates to Alexandria closed and the new group made their way in with some trepidation, the townsfolk gathered on their front porches of their seemingly normal suburban houses. People exchanged glances, muttered among one another and mouthed silent words across fences. Parents placed hands on the shoulders of their children and curtains twitched with the curiosity of those that weren’t feeling social enough to step outside and see the sights for themselves. The community hadn’t seen a new group this large before and it was causing quite the stir.

Lexie watched from the flat roof outside her bedroom window where she sat on breezy summer mornings as she drank her coffee with powered milk and listened to songs that were beyond her years on her iPod. On this particular morning, she had been provided with some free entertainment and so had not bothered to bring her earphones out with her. She sat cross-legged and traced her fingertip around the top of her mug. Strands of her wavy, dark brown hair blew in the slight wind and she pulled her sunglasses over her brown eyes. Her black camo pants and heavy military boots were stretched out in front of her and her faded Joy Division T-shirt flapped at the back, causing a cold draft up her back that was welcome in the sun.

The group was starting to cause quite the ruckus at the gate by refusing to surrender their weapons as all newcomers and everyone else was required to do at the request of Deanna, the towns leader. All weapons were checked into a communal armory and kept track of from there. The only weapons permitted were knives. She cocked her head to one side in amusement at the memory of when she had first wandered through the gate. She had done the same dance, back and forth with her hands firmly gripped around her weapons. Backed up and withdrew her knife just as one of them was doing at that moment. But eventually, she had given in from wanting to trust the kind smile of the man that had brought them there. The front door clicked shut from below her and Lexie leaned forwards to see the blonde, shimmering hair of her sister, Mel as she took up a seat on the front steps of their house.

Mel had always been the boisterous one. Their parents always joked that if they hadn’t adopted Lexie when she was 8 years old, Mel would have turned out a lot harder to handle. Believing Lexie and Mel cancelled each other out, their parents were happy the two girls seemed to get along from the beginning and their relationship had grown and strengthened as the years went by. But Mel was quiet, somewhat of a loner and preferred to stay in and draw than to go to wild parties like her sister. Not one for conversation in general, Mel was the only person she ever really talked to when she was growing up and the same could be said for the present. Except for the man that had found them on the other side of the walls, who she seemed to have formed some connection to after he had spent time getting to know then before bringing them into the community.

She finished her coffee and climbed back through her bedroom window. Passing the bookshelves stacked to the brim and the posters of old rock bands and black, italic quotes that she had scrawled from poets and famous writers. She stopped in front of a mirror in the hall, sighing at her reflection and blowing a piece of hair away from her face with a large huff. Her skin was pale but her complexion clear, her eyes large and her nose boasted a slight turn up at the end. Mel was always complimenting her, mainly because she knew compliments made her extremely uncomfortable and she loved to watch her squirm. While Lexie was the less girly out of the two of them, she still kept herself looking half decent now that they were in the comfort of an actual house again, and so made sure to shape her eyebrows and take care of her hair. Carrying on down the stairs, she left her mug on the kitchen counter, grabbed her book and headed to the front door to sit with her sister.

Mel squinted in an attempt to get a closer look at the newcomers by the gate. From what she could see, they all looked pretty worse for wear and could use a decent meal and a bar of soap. She tapped her sneaker on the wooden step below and rolled up the sleeves on her tight, checked shirt. She glanced over her shoulder when she heard the door click behind her, seeing Lexie walk towards her and plonk down next to her, sliding her sunglasses up to sit in her hair. She opened up her book and thumbed through the pages to where she last left off, marked by a tattered playing card, the Queen of clubs.

“Morning!” Mel chirped.

“Morning.” Lexie replied a little more subtly, not bothering to look up from her book.

“We have newbies.” Mel stated.  “So from what I’ve seen, we have a kid in a sheriffs hat holding an even smaller kid, a guy that has literally the best ginger moustache I have ever seen, another guy with literally the worst mullet I have ever seen, a miserable looking Latina, a woman with a seriously brave short, grey haircut, two hot black women, one of which with a badass sword, a priest, a regular looking girl in a cute checked shirt, a cute Asian guy, what looks like an angry farmers daughter and an a redneck with big arms carrying a dead opossum.” She explained, leaning on the post of the decking next to her.

“You’re a terrible, judgmental person.” Lexie responded, shaking her head before going back to her reading.

“Maybe, but I like to be prepared.” She shot back.

Mel could see Aaron talking to the group. He had arrived with them having been out for over a week scouting for new people to invite to the community and after returning with no one many times, he seemed to have turned up results this time. The last time that had happened, it was Lexie and Mel he had brought back. Deanna bobbed out of her house and down the steps. Mel could hear her introduce herself from where she sat at the other end of the street. While Alexandria wasn’t exactly a hubbub of activity and noise, she was sure she had never heard it so quiet at this time in the morning, when people were usually going about their daily business, heading to their various jobs, children making their way to a makeshift school in someone’s garage. Today though, people gathered in small groups and stayed quiet as they watched the wary and obviously distrustful group talk to Deanna by the gate. Lexie could almost hear the breeze dance down the street in amongst the buildings and trees.

Shuffling around to face her, Mel crossed her legs under her and studied her sister’s appearance. Her eyes fell over her clothes, her chipped black nail polish and her hair scraped back into a messy ponytail.

“You’re so pretty. I wish you’d ditch the boy clothes.” Mel expressed as she slid a nail file from her pocket and began swiping at the ends of her nails with it. Occasionally, her attention moved back to the newcomers, who were now finally agreeing to give up their weapons.

Lexie’s eyes briefly flicked to the side, an unamused expression pinned on her face. “My clothes are practical.” She stated as she repositioned the book in her hands and found the sentence she was reading again.

“So you keep saying” Mel sighed. “But we’re safe now. We’ve been here for months, it’s not necessary to wander around looking like an extra from Rambo anymore.”

Lexie plucked the playing card from the back of her book, slid it into place on the page and slapped the pages shut. She shifted and copied Mel’s positioning, crossing her legs and leaning her back on the opposite post. She rested her book in her lap.

“Better that than an extra from Striptease.” She retorted, gesturing with her hand to Mel’s denim shorts.

Mel decided to let the witty dig slide. She was always on Lexie’s case about her clothes, her choice of hairstyle and the fact that she never wanted to socialize or have a conversation with anyone other than her. Lexie knew there wasn’t an ounce of malice in it and so chose to give as good as she got every time, often shutting things down with an intelligent and non-negotiable reply.

Aaron’s voice rang through the air and Lexie moved her vision to the gate, observing the new group tentatively shuffling towards Deanna’s house with her leading the way. 

“The Redneck looks interesting.” Mel mused, her nail file poised in front of her hand as she craned her neck.

Lexie huffed and rolled her eyes.

“What?! Apocalypse is seriously lacking in talent. This girl is bored.” Mel complained.

“Get a hobby.” Lexie suggested.

“I have, I’m a talent scout. I am scouting for talent right now and it looks like I’ve found it.” She grinned, getting to her feet and lifting her sunglasses up to her head. She squinted and slipped the nail file back into her pocket. “Yeah, he’s hot.” She confirmed.

“Like a dog in heat.” Lexie muttered to herself.

“Isn’t it time for you to put on your habit and chastity belt, Sister Lexie?” Mel prodded, earning her an angry stare from her sister, who also got up and retreated to the table and chairs on the front porch.

Eventually the group vanished into Deanna’s huge house and were gone for around an hour. The two sisters drank coffee and shared cookies that Mel had made using a plethora of strange ingredients as was her usual way. She had become resourceful and daring with her cooking and baking since arriving at Alexandria and had yet to make an inedible meal. Lexie thanked her lucky stars that Mel had a skill in at least one useful area aside from contouring and eyeliner.

While they sat on the front porch, Lexie opened her sketch book and leaned back in her seat, balancing her ankle on her opposite knee, she used her leg to prop the paper up while she scratched away peacefully, drawing a greyscale image of Mel. She tried to be as subtle as possible, ensuring that only her eyes moved up to check on the details as Mel went about painting her toenails, which were positioned on the arm of the seat next to her.

“You know I hate it when you draw me.” Mel grumbled.

“You’ve never even seen the results. Quit complaining.” Lexie told her.

“Because you refuse to show me.”

Instead of responding, Lexie just carried on drawing. Stirred only slightly by people beginning to wander out from Deanna’s place. Over the top of her sketch book, she could see Aaron walking along the street towards them, a group of five people with him. Lexie knew the house next to theirs was empty, and assumed that these people would be their new neighbors. She continued to sketch, peering over at Mel who was now gawping at the group approaching them.

“Aaron!” She called out as she lifted an arm and waved enthusiastically.

The newcomers from the group all looked over at their porch, Aaron smiled broadly and switched direction, making tracks over to them. Lexie flipped her sketchbook shut and placed it on the table in front of her. She sucked in a deep breath and prepared herself for what would probably be the kind of situation that she hated.

Mel jumped up from her seat and crept across the porch to the steps, lifting her toes as she walked to stop them from smudging. When she reached the bottom, she threw herself into Aarons arms as the strangers behind him watched on awkwardly.

Lexie could see that the Redneck Mel had taken a shine to was present, standing off to one side, away from the others and still grasping his dead opossum. There was also an older woman who had an impressive looking knife holstered to her belt. A dreadlocked, black lady was present along with a katana and Lexie thought she looked like the kind of person she didn’t want to mess with. Stood with her, was a young boy and a man with a greying, wild beard who was holding a baby girl in his arms.

“You were gone for days! We missed spaghetti Wednesday!” Mel cried as Aaron placed her feet back on the ground.

“Spaghetti Wednesday?” The young boy muttered to the bearded man, who hushed him immediately.

“I’m sorry, y’know, tomorrow is Tuesday, we could have Spaghetti Tuesday instead? I’m sure Eric won’t mind.” He laughed.

“Ooh, breaking the rules! I like it!” Mel chuckled. “So, who’s your friends?”

“Mel, this is Rick Grimes” Aaron said, stepping aside and motioning to the bearded man with his hand. “I was watching Rick’s group for a while, decided to bring them back here and offer them a place to stay.”

“You finally found some decent people, huh?” Mel asked. “Took you long enough.”

“Yeah, well it seems these guys were worth waiting for. Let me introduce you. This is Carl, Rick’s son, Michonne, Carol and uh, Daryl at the back there. He brought dinner.” Aaron quipped as Daryl side stepped and swapped the opossum from one hand to the other.

Mel raised a hand and waved politely to everyone, they all smiled or waved back except Daryl, who offered her a slight nod before his attention was caught by a cat darting across the lawn and up the steps to the front porch, stopping on the table where Lexie still sat. The animal was a regular feature at their home. It was a boy, midnight black and never seemed to want to leave Lexie’s side. She sat quietly, watching the show and hoping she wouldn’t have to do any talking as she gently stroked along the cats back.

“Lexie! Hey!” Aaron called out.

No such luck.

She raised a rigid hand “Hey”

“Come on down here and meet your new neighbors.” Aaron encouraged.

Lexie felt anxiety bubble in her chest. She wasn’t great with new people. In fact, she wasn’t great with people at all. She attempted to hide her irritation, but Mel had picked up on it straight away as she grinned at her sarcastically like a Cheshire cat, her hands on her hips. Her military boots thudded over the surface of the porch and she slowly descended the steps and stood next to Mel. Aaron, knowing that Lexie wasn’t a hugger, offered her a polite nod and a smile, which she returned.

“Good to see you back in one piece” She told him.

“Good to _be_ back in one piece. Wine night this week sometime?” Aaron asked.

“Sure.” She agreed.

“I have to apologize for my sister. She’s an introvert.” Mel announced, making quotation marks in the air with her fingers at the word ‘introvert’.

Everyone looked at the woman at the back, Carol, when she scoffed and giggled softly.

“We have one of those too. Don’t we, Daryl?” She grinned, leaning back to see around Michonne, who was stood next to her and attempting to hide a laugh. Lexie noticed they were all now exchanging amused glances. Daryl froze to the spot under the sudden scrutiny of everyone else, his eyes flickered up and scanned the faces peering at him expectantly. He grunted and chewed on his lip. Carol shrugged at Lexie and Mel.

“He’s not as hostile as he looks.” She promised.

“I’m sure we can bring you out of your shell.” Mel affirmed, looking right at him. But Daryl was now concentrating on scuffing his boot along the floor and ignoring everyone.

“Well, Rick and everyone else, this is Melissa and Lexie. They’re sisters and they live next door to you.”

Mel offered her hand to Rick who seemed extremely uneasy and distrustful, but after a moment of deliberation, he clasped her hand in his and shook it. As she moved on to Carl and everyone else, Rick looked up at Lexie and held out his hand.

Lexie wasn’t known for her social graces and had frequently been perceived as rude and obnoxious at various points in her life which had been a result of her crushing anxiety in social situations and general dislike of people. While she knew they weren’t all bad, she chose to surround herself with a handful of people she knew she could trust, like Mel and Aaron and no one else would get a look in. On this particular day, in the middle of the end of the world, she figured she may as well just shake some hands for Aarons benefit if anything else.

She felt Ricks calloused and damaged skin as she shook his hand firmly and tried a small smile which seemed to come easier with Carl and the women. As she let go of Michonne’s glove, she saw Mel flick her long, bright blonde hair over her shoulder in a girly and flirty gesture as she let go of Daryl’s hand. She winked at him as she moved off, receiving nothing at all in response.

Lexie moved to her left and held out her hand. When Daryl took it, she was surprised at the strength in his grip in what was a fleeting but firm handshake. She avoided his face, but could feel him looking right at her and curiosity took over as she went to step back. His eyes were bright blue.

She felt a rush of relief when Aaron hurried them all away to their new house. She waved feebly while Mel flapped her hands like an excited child.

*****

By the evening, Lexie had finished up her evening shift at the armory in which she had counted, checked and stored every new weapon that had been brought in. Deanna had allowed Daryl to keep his crossbow for the time being, a decision that puzzled and irritated Lexie. She ambled along the sidewalk with her hands pushed into the pockets of her camo pants. The buzz of the new group’s arrival had created quite the stir across the town and it was all anyone seemed to want to talk about all day. She had briefly seen some of the other new faces milling about and coming and going from Deanna’s house and received a few nods and smiles along the way.

As she neared her house, she caught sight of Daryl sat on the porch of the house next door and Mel, making her way across the lawn with a plate of cookies in her hand. Lexie slowed as she approached the house, taking the steps quietly and straining to hear.

Mel grinned at the sullen and tetchy man sat on the porch’s fence, he was fiddling with a crossbow. He still appeared dirty and his arms were smeared with mud and grime. He watched her like a lion as she glided past him and stepped onto the porch by the door.

“Hi” She said breezily. “Brought you guys some cookies”

When he didn’t respond, she gingerly placed the plate on a nearby table and wrung her hands in front of her.

“Soooo, there’s a meeting in the morning. Deanna wants to dish out some jobs to you guys, y’know take advantage of your skills and what not. It’s in her back yard.” She told him.

“Alright” He grumbled, his voice gravelly and his accent strong. He carried on toying with the crossbow, as if Mel were a mere annoyance that would go away if he gave her little in return to her chatter.

“If you need a tour guide, someone to show you where everything is…” she held up a hand “… I’m your gal.”

He briefly glanced up at her before setting his crossbow aside and pulling a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket. As he lit one and took a long drag, Mel noticed how dirty his hands and fingers were, encrusted with dried blood and god only knew what else. From her spot on the porch, she could tell he had an odor of leather, sweat and smoke.

“You’re not so hot with the chit chat, huh?” She asked.

“No.” He replied quickly, deliberately blowing smoke in her direction.

She blinked rapidly and tried her best not to let his challenging gesture bother her. “Sure, I get it. My sister is the same. She doesn’t talk much. Well, except to me and Aaron. It’s not that she hates everyone else, she doesn’t, she’s just kinda shy. Me, on the other hand; I’m super sociable and always up for conversation.”

He was still blowing smoke at her, not caring for any of her ramblings. A rumbling ‘hmm’ sounding from his throat. His eyes were locked on her, his gaze narrowed and irritable.

From the other porch, Lexie smirked as she watched her sisters awkward and almost painful attempt at chatting up what appeared to be the equivalent of an irate bear. She had never changed in her pursuit of the men she liked, always getting her way in the end and enjoying the chase and challenge. Now, Lexie thought she might have just met her match and this would most likely turn out to be quite the opposite of the triumph her sister had envisioned when she had first set eyes on the dirty, hostile man with the dead opossum.

“Anyways, you’re always welcome at our place. We do Spaghetti Wednesdays at ours or Aaron and Eric’s house and we play a hell of a lot of poker. But we use candy instead of money.” She rambled, her hands gesturing wildly in the air as she spoke. “I guess we’ve all been through so much shit it’s only right that we enjoy ourselves now we have walls between us and the biters, right? Well, I hope you get settled in. I’ll leave you alone now. Stop by if you need anything.”

She backed up, slipping down the top step as she went and attempting to cover up her nervous fall with a giggle that was designed to sound chirpy and relaxed but just came out as insane and annoying. Daryl stared at her, wondering what the hell she was on and if she was always like that. His eyes followed her as she stormed past the house, seeing the smile on her face drop and morph into rage.

Lexie was laughing to herself, leaning against the front door with one leg bent and her arms crossed. Mel stormed up the steps and stopped in front of her, red faced and in a fluster.

“I’m not a conversational expert, but even I could tell what a fucking tragedy that was.” She said, pushing her lips into a line and trying to disguise that fact that she wanted to laugh hysterically in her sister’s face.

“Oh, fuck you.” Mel snapped. “Like getting blood from a stone.”

“Maybe you should shift your focus onto someone else. He is _not_ interested” Lexie observed.

“Like I’m going to take advice from you. You know nothing about men.” Mel spat, reaching out and shoving Lexie to the side and away from the door. But she stood firm, keeping one boot solidly pressed against the corner of the door and stopping her from being able to tug it open.

“From what I just saw, neither do you.” Lexie retorted, leaning to the side to look her in the eye.

Mel instantly sighed deeply and backed up a step, rubbing her face with her hand. Her expression changed to one of frustration and disappointment and Lexie knew she was about to beat herself up over it.

“You’re right. That was a fucking disaster.” She groaned. “I mean, what the fuck?! I’m not usually that… that _annoying_. But he gave me nothing back and I just- I panicked. I mean, I even started talking about you. Why would I do that?!”

“No idea” Lexie shrugged.

Mel sighed again, lifted her head high and straightened her pink, collared shirt by pulling it slightly at the bottom. Her face returned to its normal color and a flash of a smile returned to her lips

“If at first you don’t succeed…” she started.

“Oh god. Mel, don’t.” Lexie complained

“…try, try again!”

She kicked at Lexie’s boot with her white, ankle strap, wedge sandals and flicked her fingers at her in a ‘move over’ motion. Lexie complied and allowed her to open the door.

“He’s not interested” she sang at her as she wandered inside.

“Yes, he is! He just doesn’t know it yet!” She heard Mel call back from the hall.

Lexie shook her head and scoffed at her persistence. She had lost count of the amount of times she had heard her say the words ‘he just doesn’t know it yet’ in her usual defiant and determined tone. She leaned back against the outside of the house and smiled once again at the memory of Mel rambling like a wind-up toy in front of an unimpressed and confused Daryl. Glancing out to the street, she saw Carol making her way to next door. Moving her eyes further to the side, she caught sight of Daryl. Unexpectedly, he was looking over his shoulder, right at her. She wondered if he’d heard anything, figuring that it was highly likely when she considered that the distance between the two porches was only around 20 feet.

He stared at her, she could see his blue eyes even from her distance away. Then, he gave her a slight nod. She raised an eyebrow, unsure if she should do the same, but before she could decide, Carol had reached the steps and asked him if he’d had a shower yet. Lexie quickly retreated inside, passing Mel who was at the living room window, her fingers poised in the blinds so she could see Daryl and Carol from where she was. She was even spying on him now.

She shot up the stairs and into her room, opening the window and quietly crawling out onto the roof. From below, she could hear the faint chatter of Carol talking to Daryl. Her need to hear the conversation was born purely out of curiosity to find out what Daryl had made of his non-conversation with Mel, so she could report back and maybe give her a helping hand, seeing as she seemed so intent on trying to change his mind. She knew she would have to change tact to do that.

“We need to keep up appearances. Even you.” Carol said to him.

“I ain’t gonna start now.” He rasped.

“I’m going to hose you down in your sleep if you don’t take a shower” she threatened, her voice laced with a playful tone.

“You look ridiculous.” He told her.

“So do you. You’re the only one of us still covered in dirt. There’s a meeting tomorrow morning, we have to go.” She chirped as her voice seemed to get louder. Without peering over the edge, Lexie guessed she had moved closer to him.

“I know. Girl from next door came over here harpin’ on about it.” He replied.

“Oh, which one?” Carol enquired.

“The one that talks a lot.” He grumbled. “I wasn’t really listenin’. She brought cookies though. Pass me that plate”

Lexie half smiled at the thought. He had wanted to try one of those cookies and had intentionally waited until both Mel and Lexie were out of sight before he did. She tensed her shoulders as she strained to listen closer.

“Hmm, they’re pretty good. I wonder what she’s used for the sweetness in them.” Carol mused. “Ask her for me if you see her again today.”

“You’re kiddin’, right?” He said in disbelief “I ain’t doin that. Ya wanna know, go on over and ask for yaself.”

“Oh, c’mon, Daryl! It wouldn’t hurt you to make nice with the neighbors. The other sister seems more like your kind of person. You two could hit it off, you never know. She kind of looks like-“

“- stop it.” He growled. “Don’t say it”

“Daryl, there are lots of people here, maybe you’ll find-“

“-just leave me be” He interrupted.

There was a long silence and Lexie realized she was holding her breath.

“Fine” Carol shot back “but you’re going to that meeting tomorrow!”

Lexie heard her stomp off and into the house. She sat back against the outside wall of her room and contemplated the ramifications of repeating this conversation to Mel as she released a breath slowly. She decided against it, knowing was only likely to embarrass her.

*****

She was usually awake before sunrise, the dark and noiseless world outside her window tempting and luring her to envelope herself in it, revel in the silence and peace while she still could. She didn’t know if the walls would hold, if their happy, faux suburban paradise would last much longer, but she preferred to indulge in the here and now while she could. She never minded her early mornings and used a travel cup she’d found in an abandoned store to drink her morning coffee from as she padded down the sidewalk towards the armory. Occasionally, Mel or Olivia would take a shift from her to give her a break, but she found she still rose with the birds and missed being busy on those days. Instead she chose to wile away the hours reading dark poetry, literary classics and sketching in a sketchbook that she never let anyone see.

She had been working in the armory since the day after her arrival and enjoyed every minute of it. It served as a constant reminder of her past, fond memories of being around firearms since she was a child, learning about each individual model and her father taking her out into the woods so he could teach her the specifics of hunting and sniping.

Mel would always opt to stay behind in those days, only ever wanting to be around guns if there was something in it for her. But she was always quick to use her knowledge to impress certain guys she’d had her eye on or to show off in front of her friends.

Lexie descended the stairs to the underground armory and went to unlock the door, only to find it already unlocked. Confused, she pushed it open to find Olivia on the other side, a clipboard and pen in her hand. She nudged her glasses further up her nose and gave Lexie a puzzled look.

“Lexie, uh… nobody told you? Deanna wants you at the meeting this morning, so I’m doing the morning inventory for you.” She said as she hurriedly checked off guns on the sheet in front of her.

“No, Nobody told me” Lexie mumbled. “Thanks.”

She didn’t wait for Olivia to reply, she was far too busy counting and ticking her list. Lexie turned and wandered back up the stairs to the street, deciding to head for the front of Deanna's house, so she could sit and wait on the porch for everyone else to arrive. Absent-mindedly, she crept up the steps, keeping her vision down and trained on her boots hitting the wooden surface below. When she looked up, she startled at the dark figure sat on one of the chairs in front of her. He was gazing out onto the empty street as the sun peeped over the treetops, a smoke balanced on his lips until he took it away and tapped ash onto the decking. Hoping he hadn’t seen her jump, she cleared her throat and he turned his head to look at her.

Daryl's hair was scraggly and unkempt, his face weathered and tired, but his eyes were still bright and she could see why Mel was so enamored with him, his arms were toned and muscular and he had a dangerous air about him. Just Mel’s type. As they stared at each other for a few, fleeting seconds, she couldn’t help but feel like an animal in a zoo.

“Wasn’t expecting anyone to be here yet.” She said quietly as she sat down opposite him, a round, glass table separating them.

“Yeah, same.” He rasped.

“Sorry to ruin your solitude” She offered, casually leaning back in the chair and propping her feet up on the wooden handrail in front of her. Daryl observed her carefree and almost disrespectful treatment of someone else’s property for a moment, concluding that nothing really belonged to anyone anymore, so why mess about with territorial politeness? He admired her bold move.

“S’fine.” He replied, finishing his smoke and flicking it out onto the front lawn with his thumb and index finger. “Why you here so early?”

Lexie was initially surprised by the fact that he’d asked her a question after practically ignoring Mel the day before. But, she soon put it down to the fact that she was nothing like her sister. She was unobtrusive, almost anti-social. Maybe he could relate. He was certainly intimidating and she highly doubted he was the kind of person who would spend hours immersed in chatter.

“I run the armory. I’m usually up before daybreak for morning inventory.”  She explained. Her voice had a certain husky tone to it compared to Mel's and throughout her childhood and teenage years she was relentlessly picked on for her more masculine side.  Her voice was deeper, her clothes were boyish and her hair was always messy. While other little girls played with dolls, Lexie could be found in the woods building dens and scaring off other kids by growling at them.

Daryl noticed her attire, a similar pair of camo pants to yesterday, only these were dark green and she wore a black knife holster around her waist and leg. The knife strapped into it was a large hunting knife. He had previously owned a very similar one. Her baggy, black T-shirt boasted a simple quote in white text on the front.

‘If you can read this, you’re too close’.

He almost laughed to himself. _I need to get me one of those._ He thought.

“Huh.” He shrugged. “Ya ask for that job?”

“No. It was given to me.” She answered, dipping her head and picking at the chipped black polish on her fingernails. “I know a lot about guns. It was a no brainer for Deanna.”

“Right” he stated.

She could feel him looking over at her, now slouched back in his chair, one leg resting across the other and his hand draped over his knee. The conversation wasn’t exactly friendly, she got more of an accusatory tone from him but it was a lot better than what Mel had been graced with. She knew that Daryl was aware she had heard what had happened on the porch the previous day, but decided not to bring it up. In fact, talking to him altogether was proving to be taxing but she opted to hazard throwing a question his way.

“Why are you here before sunrise?” She queried.

He sucked his bottom lip into his mouth and leveled his gaze at her, she was now brave enough to look back at him, no longer intimidated by his rough and dismissive demeanor.

“Don’t sleep much.” Was all he said.

Lexie nodded and smiled, not at him but out at the quiet street. “Me too” She uttered.

“You and ya sister here from the start?” He asked.

A small laugh escaped her lungs at the thought of how she would be right now if she had, in fact, been there from the start. She would have never seen a Walker up close, would never have to rob people to survive, would never have had to drag her wounded sister through the woods for months, would never have spent hours laying in the dirt and rain trying to hunt deer. No, she definitely hadn’t been there from the start.

“No. Been here for a while now.” She told him.

Still surprised by the amount of questions he had asked, she decided to try another look at him, finding that he was still staring at her. His voice was familiar. She considered that maybe he had been from the same town as her.

“These people” He said “can we trust ‘em?”

Lexie shot him an angry look, her brow furrowed.

“Because they took away your precious guns, you don’t trust them?” She spat.

“We’ve lost people. A lot of ‘em. I don’t trust nobody no more.” He expressed.

“Neither do I.” Lexie replied, holding eye contact with him and refusing to back down “but you’re not going to find bad people here. All you’ll find is a bunch of folks that just got complacent.”

Daryl grunted and looked over his shoulder to see Rick, Michonne and Carol walking down the street towards the house. The sun had now risen to the point where it cast a warm, orange glow across the streets and reflected from the windows.

Rick called out a subdued ‘hey’ to Daryl as he approached the porch and got the same in return.

“Lexie, right?” He asked, leaning against a post opposite her. He had an air of authority about him, which came with being the leader of a group, but Lexie thought it may well have been there before that.

“Yes.” She nodded.

“Any idea what we should expect in there?” He crossed his arms, looking down at her

“She’ll just talk to you about the jobs she wants you to do. Y’know, pay your way.” She explained, looking from one face to the other of the people that seemed to tower over her. Her skin crawled and she wanted to get up and walk away, they were too close and she was now being made to interact when she didn’t want to. She saw Carol flash a smile at Daryl, who quickly looked away from her and ignored her mocking grin.

“See? It’s not as bad as you’re thinking. Just give it a chance.” Michonne stepped in. “We need this, Rick. I believe that what Aaron promised us was true.”

“You should.” Lexie interrupted. Everyone stared at her. “Aaron is a good person.”

Everyone seemed to nod slightly and back off, the space between Lexie and them becoming wider and more tolerable. She listened as Rick and the two women discussed the opinions on Alexandria, Deanna and if they should stay or go while Daryl sat in silence, brooding over the idea himself.

 

When everyone arrived and was settled in the back yard of Deanna’s house, Mel tumbled through the side gate, disheveled and panicked. Lexie rolled her eyes and picked at the grass in front of her crossed legs where she sat on the ground at the side of everyone else. Some of the townsfolk were there with everyone from the new group and the entire congregation looked up at Mel weaving in and out of the small clusters of people sat on the grass. She eventually found Lexie and plonked herself down in a heap next to her. Breathlessly flicking her hair from her face and straightening her clothes. Lexie caught sight of a rounded, red mark on her sisters neck and tutted loudly.

Daryl, who was sat on the other side of her, a few feet away, witnessed her disproval and saw her shake her head and whisper angrily at her sister.

“Is that a fucking hickey on your neck?!” She hissed.

“Surprised you know what they look like.” Mel replied mockingly.

“Who the hell did that?” She asked, her voice still a whisper but Daryl could hear every word, so could Aaron, who was seated in front. He raised an eyebrow and looked behind him, seeing the two of them exchanging irritated words.

“None of your business” Mel dismissed.

When a door opened behind Deanna, who was stood on the steps of the decking. A tall, dark haired man stepped out of the house and stood behind her. His shirt was crumpled and his collar upturned at the side. He gingerly moved behind Deanna and cleared his throat, sending a quick wink to Mel. 

“Sorry I’m late.” He said to her.

Deanna went to look over her shoulder, getting halfway and deciding to give up. She shook her head

“Honestly, Spencer.”

Lexie gawped at Spencer, who was Deanna’s son, before looking back at Mel and putting two and two together. She really didn’t know why she was still surprised by her antics, having lived with her impulsivity her entire life. Just when she thought she couldn’t be shocked anymore, Mel would exceed herself. Again.

“Oh my god” Lexie whispered to herself, tilting her head back and gazing at the sky before side eyeing Mel. “Spencer Monroe? Again? Did you leave your standards outside the wall?”

“Oh shut up. Girls got needs.” She hissed through her teeth. “Well, us _normal_ girls got needs”.

“Yeah, that ain’t normal, Mel.” Lexie smirked.

Daryl raised an eyebrow at the playful jabbing between the two sisters, himself finding the whole thing mildly amusing. Aaron had turned around and Daryl could tell he wasn’t the only one that had heard everything. He had caught Lexie’s eye and shot her an exasperated look.

“Thank you, everyone! I know it’s early, but I am thankful to you all for attending. This meeting is so we can find a way for your new arrangement to be mutually beneficial. Everyone here has to pay their way by performing a task or a job that benefits the community.”

Deanna was a small woman but with big authority. Never a tyrant or unreasonable, she was always fair and logical and had welcomed Lexie and Mel with open arms, utilizing Lexie’s knowledge of guns in the armory and Mel’s cooking skills in the pantry. Mel had often been tasked with gate or guard duty and had complained to the high heavens about it. Lexie has sometimes taken pity on her and covered some of her shifts.

As Deanna addressed certain people and discussed their skills and expertise from before the turn, Lexie started to wonder why she was there at all, she already had a job, and wasn’t about to give it up. It was one of few things that helped her cling onto her sanity, aside from her drawing and books.

“Melissa” Deanna said, snapping Lexie it of her pondering. Mel star upright on the grass. “You will be going back to gate and guard duties, three times a week.”

Instead of the usual temper tantrum, Mel merely nodded in acceptance and leaned back on her elbows. Lexie sat still, completely baffled as to why she hadn’t protested.

“Rifle and a mini skirt” She quipped at her sister, a little louder than she had expected. A few people turned their heads, not expecting to hear Lexie’s voice so loud. Some of them had lived in the same street as her for months and never heard her speak.

Daryl snorted with laughter from beside them and they both looked up at him. He pretended not to see them and turned his attention back to Deanna.

“Mr. Dixon, you’ll also be on gate and guard duty for now. But we would like you to lead some scavenging runs and we may review your tasks after a while.” Deanna told him.

He nodded briefly after the subtlest of jaw clenches and Lexie shot Mel a knowing look. _That’s convenient._ She thought.

At the end of the meeting, everyone had been given a task and some of the original residents had been given new things to do, changing up the dynamic and keeping things new and interesting. The only person who had kept their original job, was Lexie. Deanna had singled her out in front of everyone as the kind of person that they should use as an example. She was trustworthy, reliable and did her job well. All that had changed for Lexie was that she was now going to be spending one night a week in the sniper tower, which she wasn’t bothered about at all.

 When Deanna asked if anyone had any questions, a few people had volunteered their queries. Rick, the large, ginger, mustached man named Abraham and the Asian guy, who they’d learned was called Glenn had all asked questions. Deanna was about to wrap things up when Daryl suddenly spoke.

“Headin’ out later. Need a gun.” Was all he said.

Deanna offered him a polite smile and gestured to Lexie.

“Then our Lexie is the person you need to see for that.” She replied.

Everyone turned to face her and panic stung at the inside of her skin. All of a sudden, she felt like she was on a stage, completely naked with hundreds of people laughing at her. But she wasn’t, she was at a meeting being looked at by a handful of people. Consumed by the fear and anxiety that was brought in by too much attention, she swallowed hard and gradually moved her eyes to Daryl.

“Stop by the armory on your way out.” She said, her voice sounding amplified in the quiet.

He grunted an acknowledgement and she sighed as people started turning their attention away from her again.


	2. Chapter 2

The armory was meticulously stocked and well kept. There wasn’t a speck of dust and each gun was routinely cleaned and maintained along with the ammo being counted and the books kept up to date. Olivia worked well with Lexie, knowing her detailed routine was for a reason and that she rarely made mistakes due to the amount of times she’d check things. Lexie always found the paperwork to be filled out perfectly and that all the routine checks had been carried out.

When she took over from Olivia after the meeting, she found that she had very little to do, and so took the opportunity to sit on the wall outside and draw. As her pencil skimmed over the surface of the page, she felt herself relax. Her shoulders slumped and a breath of air left her lungs. She studied the unused and dented mailbox of a house across the street and began to draw its outline.

Soon disturbed from her creative outlet by Mel passing by and sitting next to her, she slammed the sketchbook shut.

“Guard duty, huh?” She asked.

“Well, thought it was about time I actually made an effort.” Mel said breezily.

“Bullshit. You asked Deanna” Lexie jabbed.

“I don’t know what you mean.” Mel dismissed, a fake look of shock creeping across her face.

“You asked Deanna to put you and Daryl on guard duty together.” Lexie said, raising an eyebrow. Mel stared at her for a moment before throwing her hands up in a surrender gesture.

“Alright, fine. I had a plan. So, what?!” She cried.

“A couple hours ago you were wrapped around Spencer.” Lexie pointed out. “Plus, you hate guard duty.”

“Spencer is a means to an end. He knows that. Daryl, on the other hand is worth enduring guard duty for.” She chirped. “You have to admit, the whole dangerous, mysterious tough guy thing is real hot.”

Lexie blinked at her, wondering if she was actually for real before she realized that she was, in fact, deadly serious.

“Oh, come on!” Mel continued “Admit it! He’s super fine! You can’t tell me you don’t want to wrap your hands around a pair of biceps like that.”

She glanced around the street for anyone that could possibly overhear. Seeing no one, she lowered her head and scuffed over the sidewalk with her boot.

“Yeah, he’s OK I guess.”

“Pfft!” Mel scoffed “OK _?_ Just _OK?_ Wow. Are you sure you’re not a lesbian? I mean, it’s fine if you are. That Latina girl, what’s her name? Oh! Rosita. She’s pretty.”

Lexie slowly turned her head to glare at her with a serious and angry expression. This wasn’t the first time Mel had accused Lexie of being gay. While she had experimented in her college days, girls simply confused her and she had eventually concluded that she was straight. After years of torment about not appearing interested in anyone and ignoring every guy that ever asked her on a date, Mel not only teased her about her lack of interest in men, she also constantly brought up the fact that she was convinced Lexie was a virgin.

“Alright, Alright. Damn.” Mel got up and straightened her tight, brown pants and white tank top. “Figured if we’re forced to spend time together, we might hit it off. I can only try.”

Lexie shrugged, a disinterested and bored gesture that told Mel she was done talking about this.

“See you later. You might want to shut the fuck up. You’re so damn noisy!” Mel joked.

“Fuck you.” Lexie called after her with a smirk on her face.

After a while of sitting in the sun, her skin began to burn and her core temperature had increased to the point that she noticed she was sweating. Wearing all black as she usually did wasn’t helping. But the armory was underground and being down there all day meant she hardly ever saw the sun at its brightest, when it illuminated things so well she could sketch the fine details that the night usually hid from her. She had waved dutifully at a few of the townsfolk and agreed to spaghetti night that evening when she had seen Aaron wander past, even though she would rather have just gone back to the house and shut herself away.

After an hour or so, no one had showed up and she expected it to be another quiet day with minimal people wanting to leave the safety of Alexandria’s walls. Supply runs were usually a couple of days and they had a few guns checked out the day before so she was expecting to be busier at some point during the day.

As she intermittently looked up at the mailbox she was still sketching, she caught sight of Daryl wandering towards her. His crossbow slung over his shoulder. She quickly shut the book and shoved her pencil in her pocket as she stood up. He wore the same leather vest she had seen him in both when he arrived and at that mornings meeting. It was then that she realized, she had seen him before. A long, long time ago.

The sleeves of his shirt were cut off underneath and his tanned arms glistened in the powerful sun. His floppy unkept hair hung about his face and his pants were ripped and torn, with bits of fabric wrapped around the ankles.

“Hey” he grunted as he approached.

“Hi. Follow me” She said, turning and thumping down the steps. At the bottom she stood aside and motioned with her hand for him to enter.

“So, you just pick what you want and sign it out. I’ll counter sign it.” She explained.

Daryl moved slowly into the room and scanned the rows of guns mounted to the walls and resting on metal shelving units. They were all numbered and appeared perfectly kept. On the walls were detailed instructions on how to disassemble and clean each gun and a list of rules that Daryl thought he should probably read but decided he couldn’t quite be bothered.

At the end, he neared some shelves and picked up a pistol. He wandered back along the same path and Lexie pulled a large, leather bound book from under a desk. She opened it to the middle pages and sat down. Daryl stood on the other side and placed the gun on the desks surface.

Lexie examined the weapon for a moment before finding it on the list and swirling the book around.

“Sign here, print here. Same when you bring it back.” She instructed.

Without a word, he plucked a pen from the pot on the desk and signed and printed in the box before sliding the book back around to face Lexie. She countersigned it and plopped the pen back in the pot as she stood and opened a filing cabinet. She rummaged through the contents and pulled out a box. Daryl quickly looked around the room, it was cold and clinical, as if she liked to keep it spotless. He was almost too afraid to touch anything in case he left a fingerprint and got scowled at. She held out the box to him.

“Your ammo.” She said.

He took the box from her and shoved it into his pocket.

“Thanks.”

Her eyes met his and she drummed on the side of her leg with her chipped, black nails.

“I’ll need the names of everyone going with you.” She sighed, turning to the back of the book.

“S’just me.” He shrugged.

She looked up, trying not to look surprised. No one ever went out alone from Alexandria. No one except Lexie, who sometimes secretly scaled the wall of a night in an effort to keep herself sharp and aware of the horrors that waited on the other side.

“Runs are usually three to five people. Two at the very least.” She informed him.

“S’just me” he repeated. “Better on my own.”

“Well, then in that case you’ll have to mark on this map which quadrants you’re likely to be in.” She pulled open a drawer and slid out a huge, laminated map that she unfolded on the desk. She held out a dry wipe marker.

“Why?” Daryl asked.

“So, if you don’t come back, I know where I have to go to find that gun.” She shrugged. “That, and… if anyone gets killed out there, I can retrieve their bodies and bring them back for burial.”

She had come up with and enforced the rules for runs herself and Deanna had been more than happy to set them in stone. Alexandria hadn’t lost many of its people and Deanna had credited Lexie for that but when they had lost someone, it had always been her that had been adamant about retrieving the bodies and weapons. Having not had any ‘lone wolves’ for a long time, Daryl’s insistence on traveling alone should have worried her, had he not just arrived from being outside the walls for what seemed to be a lot longer than her.

Daryl stared at her, both impressed by her tactics and shocked by her matter of fact attitude to everything. He understood more than anyone how macabre the world could be, even before the turn, so the dark nature of her rules was something he could easily comprehend and agreed with.

“Smart.” He uttered.

She didn’t reply. He saw her push her lips together and look down at the map. She was still holding out the pen. He finally took it from her grasp and drew and X in a box before he paused.

“Goin’ huntin’, so I might cover more ground than one of these boxes.” He suggested.

“You can mark more than one box.” She replied quietly.

He ended up placing X’s in five boxes, covering an area of around ten miles.

“This Deanna’s idea?” He asked.

“It’s mine.” She replied

He made an impressed grunt, took the gun, shoved it into his waistband and stepped back.

“Good luck. On your hunt.” Lexie said as she sank down into the chair behind the desk.

“Thanks” he mumbled as he backed up and headed for the stairs.

***** 

Spaghetti night wasn’t something that Lexie usually got too excited about. Mel, on the other hand, relished the opportunity to socialize and drink red wine. During dinner, she would waffle on enthusiastically and endure various jibes and digs from Lexie, never once taking anything too seriously. It had become a routine they all had that whoever had cooked, wouldn’t have to clear up afterwards. That night, Lexie and Aaron had cooked, meaning they could retreat to the living room while Mel and Eric cleared the table. Eric having to endure Mel’s repetitive ramblings about her plan to get through to Daryl and get him into bed.

“What do you think?” Aaron asked Lexie as he settled on one of the two couches.

“Of what? My sister’s insatiable need to be a maneater?” She mumbled, taking a large gulp of red wine. The chalky aftertaste reminding her that this was wine that had been found in the basement of a house, not carefully chosen in a store. She grimaced and swallowed.

“Of Rick and his group.” Aaron confirmed.

“Oh” Lexie said, nodding. “Uh, they’re fine, I guess.”

Aaron gave her an unimpressed look. “C’mon Lex, out of everybody in this town, you’re the best judge of character I’ve met. You must have an opinion.”

Aaron had quickly become the sort of person she didn’t actually mind being around. He was easy to talk to yet respected her need to her own personal and quiet space and when she fell silent, he simply sat back and relaxed. The two of them regularly got together without Eric or Mel for a ‘Wine night’, the result of a discovery of a cellar full of boxes of red wine in a house just outside the walls. Lexie had found it herself and disclosed the information to Aaron, who had grinned mischievously at her and suggested that maybe they should keep such a potentially controversial find to themselves, for the good of the community and all. Since then, one of them had crept into the house once a week to retrieve a bottle and they would sit on the roof outside Lexie’s bedroom and polish off the entire thing, sometimes even going back for more and resulting in a headache and an empty, sickly feeling the next day that Lexie thought was well worth it. She had always felt comfortable with Aaron, aside from the fact that he was gay and she knew he wouldn’t hit on her, he had much the same opinions on things as she did. Mel and Eric knew these nights belonged to Lexie and Aaron and never asked to join, they had Spaghetti Wednesday’s, after all.

She leaned forwards, her wine glass clinking against the shiny surface of the coffee table as she put it down and opened her hands in a gesture that told Aaron she was slightly uncomfortable at the question.

“They don’t trust us. They don’t trust anyone. I can see why.” She expressed.

“Hmm” Aaron mused. “So can I. They just need time. Like you and Mel did.”

It had taken Aaron a while to convince Lexie that he wasn’t going to rob them or hurt them in anyway when he had found them holed up in a shack at the side of the road. Lexie had booby trapped the entire place and Aaron had almost had important parts of his anatomy shot off thanks to her tripwires on the front porch. He had offered them water and food and they had only accepted after seeing him sample everything himself first. Eventually, they had agreed to follow him to Alexandria, Lexie with her finger poised on the trigger of a pistol in her pocket, should everything turn out to be a horrible lie. Luckily, it hadn’t and after a couple of weeks the two of them were settling into their new home, Mel’s injury was patched up and Lexie had finally started to let down her guard. But not too much, a little suspicion was never a bad thing.

“It doesn’t help that Mel is scheming to get into Daryl’s pants.” Lexie stated, rolling her eyes.

Aaron chuckled, more than aware of what Mel was like. He had seen her creeping out of a couple of peoples houses now. Spencer being one of them. Mel always maintained she was just having fun, and in a world like they lived in, more people needed to do the same. It was a view that neither Aaron or Lexie could disagree entirely with, it’s just their ideas of fun were slightly different to Mel’s.

“She might have her work cut out with that one.” He laughed. “He keeps himself to himself. He’s honorable though. I’ve seen him go to great lengths to keep the rest of them safe.”

“Well, you know Mel, always up for a challenge.” She agreed.

“Yeah, she’s definitely got one. You uh, not got your eye on any of the newcomers yourself?” he probed cautiously.

Lexie shot him a weary look and groaned “Oh, please. Not you too. I thought you were on my side!”

“I am! Alright, I’m sorry. You’re right, I should know better.” He grinned. “You’d tell me though, if you did, right?”

She grabbed a small cushion from the couch beside her and launched it across the room at him with a fair degree of strength, he recoiled at the sight of it hurtling towards him and quickly held his wine glass up to avoid a collision. The cushion hit his side and he chuckled loudly.

“Course I would. Asshole.” Lexie spat, smirking to herself as she picked up her glass and took another sip.

***** 

The next day brought more sightings of the new group. Lexie had spoken to Carol as she passed the armory, along with Abraham and an awkward man with an interesting haircut called Eugene. He seemed to display a high level of intelligence but little to no social skills and Lexie wondered if she came across like that to everyone else. He had spoken so fast, she thought he had attempted to ask her on a date but wasn’t quite sure. Abraham had laughed loudly and slapped him across the back before telling him to ‘leave the poor girl alone, haircut’.

When the gate slammed shut and she spotted Daryl swaggering along the street towards her, she stood from her spot on the wall and counted the number of kills he boasted that were hung about his broad shoulders. Three rabbits, four squirrels and two opossums, one large and one baby. She was impressed and knew Mel would be horrified at all the skinning she would have to do in the pantry. She giggled internally at the thought.

“Hey” Daryl grunted, stopping in front of her.                                                                      

“Hi” she smiled before turning and descending the steps to the armory. He followed on, tugging the pistol from his waistband and setting his kills down on the floor. He placed the gun on the desk along with the box of ammunition. She slid the ledger towards him and he signed the gun back in, glancing up at her as she took the pen from his grasp and wrote her signature in the next box along. She closed the book and flicked her head up at the pile of dead animals on the floor.

“That’s a lot.” She said quietly.

“Aint bad. Could have been better.” He grumbled.

“Ditch the crossbow next time.” She suggested bravely.

“What?” He replied, his face changing. Lexie could see a bemused expression creep across his features.

“We have some really good hunting rifles. I doubt that crossbow has the pounds to take down a white tail deer.” She challenged.

He scoffed loudly, shifting on the spot and rubbing his slightly bearded chin with one hand.

“You hunt.” He stated.

She nodded, half smiling at him. She did hunt, but nowhere near as much as she used to. She would sometimes take a couple of people outside the walls to see what she could get, but while extra people were needed to keep the Walkers at bay, heavy footed tag alongs were usually more of a hindrance than a help and eventually, Lexie’s patience for the hunt had worn thin. She had hoped it would remind her of hunting trips with her father when she was younger, but the desired effect was nowhere near.

“With guns.” He observed.

She nodded again, gesturing to the wall of differing guns that were her pride and joy.

“Taken down white tails with this.” He told her, lifting his crossbow slightly. “A lot of em.”

“White tail rabbits?” She teased, her smile becoming wider. Such a bold, playful and challenging conversation was rare for Lexie, but something told her Daryl wasn’t used to such things either and so she had opted to test his reaction. He was taken aback by both her sudden bold confrontation and her bright, attractive smile. A smile he had seen before. He huffed in disbelief, shaking his head unable to disguise his amusement.

“You got some sass for an introvert.” He prodded.

She tilted her head pushed her lips up, deciding she would take that observation as a compliment.

“Could say the same about you.” She retorted as she leaned back in her seat and popped a boot on the edge of the desk.

“Huh. Yeah. Thanks for the gun.” He smirked, picking up the collection of animals and heading for the door.

“Daryl” Lexie called out. He stopped and glanced to his side at her. She was tilting back in her chair, twirling the pen effortlessly around in one hand, over and under her fingers. He noticed her T-shirt, Jack Daniels Tennessee Whiskey. _Another good T-shirt choice._ He thought. Something else that had caught his attention was the tattoo on her forearm. A pair of thick, black lines all the way around her wrist and another pair by her elbow. In between, were several symbols that Daryl couldn’t decipher and above the lines on her wrist the symbols for the Queen of Clubs.

“I hate to break it to you. But you have to take your white tails to Mel in the pantry. She’ll skin them and ration them.” She clarified.

His face fell at the prospect of having to hand in food that he had obviously caught for his group. Lexie concluded that he had only gone out hunting to cling on to some kind of sense of normalcy after being outside the walls for so long. She knew this because she was the same and she could see it written all over his face when he had checked the gun out the day before. He had clearly been a provider to the group and was finding it hard to adjust to not having to be that anymore. He disappeared from view and she sighed, looking down at the gun on the table.

 *****

Mel was alone in the pantry, stacking tins on a shelf and humming to herself. The Pantry was actually a large garage at the side of someone’s property. It had a fully equipped kitchen at the back which was why it had been chosen as the main storage area for food for entire community. Olivia also worked here on the days when Mel didn’t and Mel had been given the impression that Olivia thought her to be tiresome, messy and annoying. Not that she cared.

Due to her impressive cooking skills and ability to make something out of nothing, Mel had written a number of recipe cards that she displayed on an old magazine rack on the wall of the pantry. She would often recommend meals that could be made and kept until later days in order to make them last as long as possible, also recommending substitutes for popular, rare items.

She finished stacking the shelf and wandered across the open garage door to the other side when she heard a thud from behind her. She whirled around to see Daryl stood over a mound of dead animals, two of which were Opossums, one considerably bigger than the other. Her eyebrows shot up and she took a step back.

“That is a…large Opossum.” She pointed out.

“Yeah, was proud of that one.” He bragged as he nudged at it with his boot.

“I can see why.” She giggled.

“Lexie said I should bring ‘em here. Ya need me to skin ‘em?” He offered.

“Oh, no. I can do that. I’m not as squeamish as I look.” She grinned. A little voice at the back of her mind prodded and poked at her confidence. She was shocked that he’d suddenly decided to talk to her, even if it was about dead animals. She intended to tone things down a bit after learning the hard way that the chirpy, chatty approach didn’t quite work.

“Alright.” He answered.

She wracked her brain for a way to keep him there, her eyes darting around the room in search of some kind of prompt. Finding nothing, she remembered her plan.

“So, I guess we’re going to be guard buddies.” She shrugged, as if it was nothing.

“Uh, yeah.” He muttered, shifting his crossbow further up onto his shoulder. After practically ignoring her the day before, Daryl had been lectured by Carol and felt a stab of guilt at his harsh treatment of someone that was simply trying to be neighborly. Being the least sociable out of everyone meant that he sometimes forgot his manners, especially when dropped in an unfamiliar, too good to be true environment. But now, after being hassled by his friend, he felt the need to at least try and make out that he was a half decent person. If he trusted these people or not, he would lose nothing by offering a few short responses in conversation.

“Deanna puts a schedule up on the wall outside her house. Our first shift is tomorrow night.” She mentioned, drawing her thin, white hoodie around her waist.

“OK” He nodded.

“Oh” She said, digging around in the back pocket of her jeans. She pulled out a folded note and held it out to him. “Will you give this to Carol? It’s the recipe for the cookies I made. She said she wanted it.”

He took the note from her hand, noticing how bright her eyes were. Blue, bluer than his. Her nose was decorated with freckles.

“Sure” He agreed.

“OK, well, thanks for the…dead things.” She giggled, lunging forwards and taking hold of the string that bound all of the animals together. She dragged them towards her in a strained display of independence.

“No problem.” He mumbled. “See ya tomorrow night.”

 *****

The house was larger than was needed for Lexie and Mel and they always expected to eventually have to share with someone else, but it never happened. Even when the new group had arrived they were given the opportunity to stay together, albeit it in two houses but near one another and no one had to live with strangers.

From the moment they had stepped foot in their new house, Mel and Lexie had tried to make it their own. After spending so long living in abandoned buildings and tents, the thought of mattresses and running water felt like heaven to them both. Mel had wasted no time in requesting clothes and make-up from the teams that did the supply runs, while Lexie asked for books and art supplies. Deanna had allowed everyone to request a limited number of non-essential items with each run, provided the teams were not putting themselves at risk to get them. She believed that it was important to try and hold onto a sense of normality and enable people to indulge a little in the things that made them happy.

The living room in the house was home to two, large off-white couches that were so comfortable, Mel had built up a long history of good naps on each one. They had a TV, but were only allowed to use it at certain times to conserve the power. The walls were adorned with a mixture of artwork from the tastes of both sisters. Mel opted for generic, photographic scenes of cities and landscapes, while Lexie preferred the darker side of things, choosing framed drawings of skulls, butterflies and quotes from horror films and poets.

Their kitchen, which was adjacent to the house next door, was simple but cluttered thanks to Mel’s disinterest in clearing up after herself. Lexie would often follow her around the house and pick up after her, clothes left here, make-up left there. She had lost count of the amount of times she had threatened to throw everything out with trash and incinerate the lot.

She sighed as she picked up a used coffee mug and a bowl from the sink and began to wash them. Her eyes lifted, caught by movement in front of her. Out of the kitchen window, she could see right into the house next door. Carol stood with her back to her, a large cookie jar off to her side with the lid off and placed next to it. Lexie shifted to the side, able to duck out of sight should Carol turn around and see her peering through the window and into their house. A flash of metal caused her to do a double take before she saw Carol drop a gun into the jar and put the lid back on.

Lexie understood the groups apprehension about moving into the community. It was all happy and smiley and supposedly safe behind the walls and having been on the outside for so long, it would have been hard to adjust to actually being able to relax for once. She knew the feeling well, but had still not hidden any firearms from Deanna upon her arrival. Now faced with a decision to make about what to do with this information, she finished up cleaning what was in the sink and headed up the stairs to her room.

In the morning, Olivia was scheduled to cover the armory and Lexie jumped up the steps to Deanna’s place to return a book she had borrowed which was shoved into the back of her jeans. She was stopped dead in her tracks by Spencer, glaring down at her from his tall height.

“Lex” He said with the most transparent of grins on his face.

“Spence.” She replied, her eyes narrowed and her body taught. She really didn’t like Spencer, and he knew it.

“Where’s Mel?” He asked.

“I don’t know.” She said with a certain degree of annoyance. This wasn’t the first time Spencer had accosted her looking for her sister and she wished he would just find someone else to pester. Better still, someone else to satisfy his urges with other than Mel.

“Well, if you see her, can you tell her I’m looking for her?” He requested.

Lexie thought for a moment. Mel had been messing about with Deanna’s son for a few weeks now, much to Lexie’s disgust. She wasn’t his biggest fan and knew he treated her like an object rather than a person. She considered him to be a coward, desperate to be seen with someone like Mel but not wanting to put in any of the commitment. Luckily, Mel hadn’t been interested in anything more than the occasional one-night stand here and there. Spencer’s opinion of Lexie wasn’t the most flattering either, she had caught him referring to her as the ‘Manly sister’ and in retaliation she had reveled in suggesting in front of a considerable group of people that he might want to keep the noise down next time he was in her sisters’ room because she didn’t want to listen to anymore of his foot fetish dirty talk. She had casually walked away listening to the delightful sound of everyone sniggering. Now, glaring up at him in Deanna’s hallway, she released a slight laugh.

“No.” She replied simply before stepping past him and placing a hand on the handle of the living room.

Spencer shook his head at her, called her a ‘bitch’ under his breath and left the house while she paused, hearing raised voices from inside the room. She side stepped and peered through the gap in the door to find Deanna embroiled in a dispute with Rick. Daryl, Abraham, Carol and Glenn were also present, dotted around the room, mostly with their arms crossed. Lexie strained to hear, but managed to make out a few key words from the conversation. The group wanted their guns back. Everyone said their piece except Daryl, who stayed at the back of the group by the window. Lexie’s eyes cast down to the ankle of Carol’s jeans and she exhaled slowly, wishing she hadn’t witnessed their little secret last night.

When the door opened, Lexie had slinked back to the porch just at the right time and was leaning back on the handrail of the steps as the group passed. Rick nodded politely at her and made his way to the sidewalk followed by Glenn, Abraham and then Carol. As she went to pass, Lexie stepped out in front of her.

“Hand over the piece.” She said, keeping the volume of her voice low.  

Carols initially regarded her with surprise and cocked her head to the side but Lexie’s eyes were locked on hers and she wasn’t backing up.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about” Carol uttered.

“The Ruger LCP” Lexie said.

“I-I don’t have any-” Stuttered Carol.

“It’s strapped to your ankle.” She interrupted.

Daryl had moved out to her side and was also now staring at Lexie’s confrontation. He went to speak but thought twice when Carol held her hand out and stopped him.

“Hand it over. I’ll register it and store it and I won’t say a word. Or, I’ll go and tell Deanna, right now.” Lexie warned.

What followed next was an intense series of stares between everyone, especially when Rick stepped up to the plate and attempted to avert Lexie’s gaze from Carol but to no avail. She wasn’t giving up. She was sure that gun was attached to Carol’s leg and she wasn’t leaving without it being handed over. Her determination was born both out of respect for her own rules and job and respect for Deanna, who had managed to maintain a peaceful and calm environment even if the people living in the community were too comfortable.  

“You do not need guns inside these walls.” Lexie told her.

Daryl ducked down and snatched the gun from the holster on Carol’s leg. She startled and shot him a shocked look, her mouth dropping open.

“Maybe she’s right. Do we really need this? I don’t sense a threat here. Do you?” He asked, his eyes flicking from her to Rick, bypassing Lexie, who was not expecting this at all. Rick held up his hands and shrugged.

“Looks like you’ve made your decision” He commented.

“Look” said Daryl as he turned back to Carol “Ya wanted me to try, right? Well, this is me tryin’. Here. Take it.”

He held the gun out to Lexie who had to force herself not to stare at the weapon in his hand for too long. She slapped a hand over it and took it from him, pushing it into her pocket.

“Thanks.” She whispered under her breath. “You have any more? In that cookie jar of yours.”

Carol grit her teeth and looked at Rick with an expression that told Lexie it may not have been her that had decided the hiding spot for the gun.

“No. Just that one.” She grumbled.

“OK. It’s uh…it’s nothing personal.” She stammered.

“I know.” Carol sighed loudly, her short grey hair billowing up at the front. She shook her head subtly and quirked her mouth up at one side, telling Lexie that she wasn’t taking anything personally.

 *****

In Deanna’s living room there were old fashioned Chesterfield couches and a large, dark wooden desk that was always covered with paperwork, blueprints and plans, scribblings and lists. The shelves were overflowing with ornaments, trophies and an assortment of other items that no one was sure belonged to Deanna or the rest of her family. There was also a heavily stocked bookshelf that had made Lexie’s eyes light up with delight when she had first seen it. Since then, the two women had been sharing reading recommendations and swapping titles.

Lexie wandered in to find Deanna at her desk, scribbling yet more notes. She looked up and grinned widely at her, placing her pen on the paper. Lexie padded to the bookshelf and tugged the book from her back pocket, sliding back into the same gap she’d taken it from.

“What did you think?” Deanna asked.

Lexie ran her finger down the book’s spine, over the black, shiny title and author’s name. ‘ _The Metamorphosis Franz Kafka.’_

“It was like a warped fairy tale.” She hummed.

Deanna chuckled from behind her “I found it to be mostly biographical. Not in the literal sense, you understand.”

“I can see that.” Lexie agreed. “I noticed elements of Nietzsche, Freud, even Marxism to an extent. But mostly it was just weird.”

“That’s because you’re much more insightful than most, my dear.” Deanna observed. “Please, sit.” She gestured to one of the couches as Lexie turned to face her. She sank down onto the dark red leather, noticing the video camera in the corner. It was used to film everyone’s entry interviews so Deanna could re-watch them and pick out each person’s strengths and weaknesses. A somewhat intrusive but useful way of finding out who would be good for what job, and who had the potential to be a less than productive member of the community. Lexie’s entry interview had been short and sweet after she had stared like a deer in the headlights and said a minimal amount of words. Deanna had later admitted that she saw a lot more in Lexie’s interview that was initially obvious. She saw someone who had been traumatized but was resilient and strong, intelligent and diligent. Lexie didn’t see any of that. She just wanted to get to the bookshelf.

“Our newcomers are slightly tetchy.” Deanna huffed as she leaned on the front of her desk, her hands reaching backwards to steady herself. “But given time, they’ll come around. Just like you and Melissa did. I have been mulling over a couple of things. Rick- he was a cop, did you know that?”

Lexie shrugged one shoulder up. She had figured as much. The others looked to him for everything and he had the authoritarian air of someone in law enforcement.

“I had a hunch.” She expressed.

“Well, I was wondering how he would fair as our constable. Someone to enforce the rules besides me. Give people more of a sense of stability. Even in small communities such as this, people will always toe the line. Then there’s Daryl, I feel like we could expand on his role here and he could be extremely useful for tasks outside the walls.”

As she ran her fingertips along the bumpy landscape of the chesterfield couch, Lexie wondered why she was sat here at all.

“I’m sorry, are you asking for my opinion?” She questioned.

“Lexie, you picked up on social, psychological and philosophical aspects of Franz Kafka’s work that I didn’t. So, yes I’m asking for your opinion.” Deanna explained, now clasping her hands in front of her.

“Uh…” Lexie grunted, shuffling awkwardly in her seat and sitting on her hands. “I think Rick has the potential but he’s still reeling from whatever they went through before coming here. Daryl likes being alone, he went out hunting yesterday and brought back a hefty load of dead animals.”

Deanna looked down at an uneasy Lexie, who was still perched with her hands pinned under her legs as she spoke.

“Interesting” She considered. “The others seem like they’d be useful for security, protection, maybe construction when we decide to move the walls back. I may reconsider some of their tasks. But we’ll see how they get on for now.”

She moved from the desk and approached the bookshelf while Lexie wondered if she could get up and go yet. If they weren’t discussing books in this room, then she rarely wanted to be in it. Deanna selected a title and slid the book from the shelf. Wandering back to the couch, she sat down next to Lexie, who had now released her hands from under her legs and resumed her tracing of the leather curves on the couches arm.

“Try this one next. I think you’ll be able to draw more from it than I could. Come back when you’re finished and let me know what you thought.” Deanna offered, handing her the book.

Lexie took it instantly and stood up, backing towards the door.

“Thanks” She said, holding the book up “I gotta go. See ya”.

Deanna chuckled to herself at Lexie’s need to leave any social situation that she hadn’t voluntarily put herself in. She never held it against her, or thought her to be rude or selfish, accepting that it was just the way she was.

 *****

That night, Mel had buzzed around the house, trying on a myriad of clothing in front of the hallway mirror as Lexie reluctantly gave a thumbs up or thumbs down at each outfit she tried, her eyes peering over the top of the book that Deanna had given her. She had rolled her eyes countless times, reminded her she was just doing guard duty but Mel had shot back that it was all part of her plan, that she was going to give the impression that she was laid back, capable and nothing like the tragic bimbo that had turned up on Daryl’s front porch on the day he’d arrived. She turned around in front of the mirror, smoothing down her jeans at the thighs.

“OK, my ass looks great, my hair looks great. What else do I need to do?” She fretted.

“How about a personality transplant?” Lexie muttered.

“What?” Mel called out.

“I said don’t forget your knife.” Lexie lied.

“Right! My knife. Don’t want to look like an amateur” She commented as she ran into the living room and picked up her knife and holster from the coffee table. Lexie watched her strap it to her belt and met her eyes.

“Mel, be careful” She warned.

“Oh, come on, Lex. We used to go through this every time I went on a date. I’m a pro at this.” Mel dismissed.

“This is not a date!” Lexie exclaimed, her voice getting louder as she stood up and thudded her book on the couch. Mel stopped in the doorway and sighed, slowly turning to look back at her worried sister.

“I know.” She tried to assure her.

“No, you don’t. You even applied nail polish. This is not a date. It’s guard duty with a guy you don’t even know, in an apocalypse.” She explained. “We don’t who he is or what he’s like yet, Mel. Just…be careful.”

Mel sighed and walked up to her sister, draping her arms around her shoulders. Lexie usually hated being touched by anyone, but Mel had been the only exception for her entire life. When she was in the 5th grade, a boy had attempted to kiss Lexie in the school yard. She had punched him so hard she broke his nose and found herself in a whole world of trouble until Mel had told their parents that the boy had been being mean to her and tried to kiss her when she didn’t want him to. The punishment was less severe and Mel had known from that day that she wasn’t going to be a very tactile person with anyone else. She hugged her tight, her knife holster pressing into Lexie’s body.

“You’re such a fuckin’ party pooper” Mel huffed. “But you have always been my voice of reason. So, yes I’ll be careful.”

She pulled back and tucked a strand of Lexie’s hair behind her ear, smiling broadly at her.

“You’re beautiful, Lex. Should let that hair of yours down, put something a little figure hugging on and get yourself laid.” She suggested.

Lexie raised an eyebrow at her in disapproval. It always came back to this. The stark difference in the two of them. The girly one and the tomboy, the extrovert and the introvert, yin and yang.

“No” She replied simply.

Mel scoffed and waved a hand at her in dismissal. She pulled on her denim jacket and blew a kiss to her sister as she left the house.

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and for the encouragement so far!  
> Slightly shorter chapter. Forgive any mistakes, I'll pick them up :)

Daryl had found that Mel maybe wasn’t as irritating as he’d first thought. She seemed much more relaxed although she chatted animatedly, using her hands to explain things as well as her words.  He mostly listened, occasionally giving her a one-word answer or a short sentence where it was needed. He didn’t dislike her company, but would definitely rather have been on his own. During a perimeter check, in which they both walked the entire circumference of the community, they passed the back of Mel and Lexie’s place.

At the back of the house was a flat roof that was large enough for Lexie to climb out onto and sit against the wall without being seen. There was also another flat roof at the front of her room, where she sometimes used to sit in the early morning sun and drink coffee or sketch quietly before the rest of the town awoke. No one knew she used the back as much as she did. Every night she would drag a blanket and pillows out of the window with her and set up camp on what she called her ‘perch’. She could hear the conversations of whoever was passing by on a perimeter check as she lay and watched the stars or read her book by the light of a candle. On this particular night, she had managed the first two chapters of the book Deanna had given her before she heard voices approaching. She chanced a quick look over the edge to see Mel and Daryl walking along, side by side. Daryl’s crossbow was slung over his shoulder and Mel was clutching the usual M4 Carbine that they used for guard duty.

“We were out there for a long time.” She could hear Mel explaining “Lexie, she looked after me. I broke my ankle, she strapped it up and dragged me through the woods for weeks. Said we had to keep moving. We found this house and she booby trapped the whole thing to keep us safe. Aaron turned up and triggered a tripwire. Thank god he side stepped or he wouldn’t have any balls left.”

She could hear Daryl laugh quietly. “Damn.”

“I know, right. Lex is pretty badass with traps and hunting and guns and…pretty much everything except socializing.”

 _Thanks, Mel. Appreciate that._ Lexie thought.

“She seems alright.” Daryl responded.

“Oh, she’s awesome. She’s not my biological sister, but I love her like she is.” Mel chirped.

_I love you too, you bitch._

There was a moment of quiet when all that could be heard was a sniff and the rustling of boots stepping over grass. Then, Daryl surprised both Lexie and Mel.

“Sorry if I was an asshole the other day. On the porch.” He mumbled. “Aint so good with people. Like ya sister I guess.”

“It’s fine, forget it.” Mel said breezily.

What she really wanted to say was that she had been trying to make a good impression which would have led to her flirting with him which would have led to him getting laid. But that approach was quite obviously not going to work with this one. She had brushed it off as if it had been nothing, when really it had embarrassed her and sent her scurrying away with her tail between her legs. But now he had apologized, and that alone told her that her pursuit of him was justified.

 *****

 

“Lex, you want some?” Eric offered as he held out a bottle of water. Lexie raised a hand, declining the offer and went back to staring at the sky through her sunglasses as she lay flat on the grass verge outside of the Armory, Eric on one side, Aaron on the other. They had been sat together for around half an hour while Lexie took advantage of not having to do much in the underground room of guns.

The sun was particularly strong, making the ground hard and cracked. It was one of those rare days where she actually considered wearing something that wasn’t a dark color, but then again, she didn’t actually own anything else. She had however, chosen some dark blue, plain board shorts and a baggy, black tank top with dipped arm holes. Underneath, she wore a grey cropped top.

“How did Mel’s first guard shift with Daryl go?” Aaron asked.

“Of course, I forgot it was last night!” Eric cried.

“Fine.’ Lexie replied “She came home and listed every thing he said to her and how it could be interpreted as he likes her and wants to sleep with her. I am so done with this already.”

She bent her legs and sat up, grass sticking to her back. Eric swiped at it, brushing it off for her.

“She’s not been this keen with any of the others, has she?” He enquired.

Aaron shook his head and motioned for Eric to hand the water over, his forehead now beading with sweat in the heat. Eric passed him the bottle.

“Nope” Said Aaron before he took a gulp of water.

Footsteps on the sidewalk caught Lexie’s attention and she looked behind her, seeing some of the newcomers approaching. Aaron screwed the cap back on the water bottle and placed it on the grass next to him. He turned his body slightly to see Glenn, Carol and Maggie walking along the road.

“Hey guys. Settling in alright?” Aaron beamed.

“Yeah, thanks. Just takes a little getting used to.” Carol said, stopping in front of them. “Lexie, I don’t think you’ve met Maggie”

Lexie did a double take before shuffling around on the grass and shyly holding out a hand to a pretty brunette.

“Hi. I’m Lexie.” She said quickly and quietly.

Maggie took her hand and squeezed it. “Maggie, nice to meet you.”

“Lexie works in the armory with Olivia” Eric told them “So, if you need any weapons if you head out, she’s the person to ask.”

Maggie nodded and smiled thinly at Lexie. Glenn, who had remained quiet, took her hand.

“Uh, Maggie won’t be going out if I can help it. Not with the baby on the way.” He explained.

“You’re pregnant?” Lexie rapidly asked, much to Aaron and Eric’s amazement.

Maggie nodded, her smile growing wider as she looked at Glenn, then Carol. “Yes”

“O-oh” Lexie stammered. “Congratulations.” She offered. She hadn’t seen a pregnant person since before the turn and couldn’t help but wonder how a baby could be brought up in the world the way it was now. She had seen the little girl who lived next door and assumed that she too must have been born after everything had gone awry. When she really thought about it, she had a lot of respect for those that were willing to brave being parents in an apocalypse. Life had to go on somehow and with the promise of houses and walls, why not keep trying to rebuild humanity.

“Thank you” Maggie grinned.

“Lexie, can I talk to you a moment, please?” Carol requested, holding her hand out to the area further down the grass verge.

Lexie’s back prickled with dread at the thought of having to talk to someone she didn’t know without having to mentally prepare first. But she nodded and got to her feet, brushing down her shorts and thudding across the grass in her black sneakers. Carol followed and stopped a few feet away from the others.

“I wanted to give you these” She said, dipping her hand into a canvas bag and pulling out a small, white box. “They’re cookies I made. They’re probably nowhere near as good as your sister’s. But I was hoping you’d accept them as a peace offering. You know, for the gun thing yesterday. It wasn’t fair of us to put you in that position and I appreciate you not saying anything to Deanna.”

Lexie stared down at the box in her hand before her manners kicked in and she gently took it from her grasp.

“Thank you.” She uttered “You didn’t have to do that.”

“First time I’ve been able to bake in a very long time. I wanted to make it worthwhile” She smiled.

“OK” Lexie replied, half smiling back at her.

She seemed like a nice lady, gentle and kind. But Lexie knew that she wouldn’t have survived as long as she had without having to do the same horrific things that she and her sister had been forced to do in the name of survival. She considered that underneath her floral bloused façade, Carol was most likely a formidable woman who had found herself with no choice but to toughen up. Much like her and Mel, the turn my not have infected them, but it had changed them and that change was irreversible.

 *****

Claustrophobia. It meant more than just being trapped in a small space to Lexie. She was scared of being trapped in relationships. Scared of being limited to one thing. Scared of people thinking they were protecting her when instead they were smothering her. She was scared of being in a position where she was completely and utterly dependent on someone or something else. The thought made her feel helpless and that was why she scaled the wall some nights and spent time roaming the woods and abandoned buildings.

She would use metal rungs to shove into the holes in the beams of the fence to make herself a makeshift ladder. It was always behind Mrs. Neidermeyer’s house as she always turned in early and closed her blinds and drapes. She would never go unarmed, and always signed out a pistol, checked the boxes of the areas on the map she would be in and followed her own rules.

It had now been just over a week since the new group had arrived and Mel and Daryl had now completed three guard shifts together. She had talked non-stop about the archer and had come up with yet more hair brained schemes to get closer to him. One of which being a party that Lexie had refused to agree to. Mel had begged, pleaded and offered deal after deal but to no avail. The thought of having all those people in her house literally made Lexie nauseous.

When her feet hit the floor on the other side of the wall, she could barely see her hand in front of her face. She quickly equipped her knife and clicked her flashlight on, keeping it low to the floor so as not to attract any attention. Slowly and carefully, she followed her usual path into the woods, instantly feeling like she could breathe again in the vast space of nothing but the trees and the dead.

She kept her breathing steady and almost inaudible but her heart always thumped in her chest. Being outside the wall was never easy, but Lexie felt it was necessary and had started to enjoy her night time trips. She froze when a twig snapped behind her. Her hand slowly crept to her gun holster and slid the cold metal from the leather. She turned on her heel, pointing the gun in the direction of the noise to find Daryl leaning casually against a tree in front of her.

 “The hell you doin’ out here alone?” He shrugged with one shoulder.

The air escaped her lungs in a loud huff and she stumbled backwards, relief washing over her. Slipping the gun back into the holster, she swallowed hard and took a moment to calm her hammering heart.

“Could ask you the same thing.” She eventually said while she tried to catch her breath.

“Saw ya scale the wall. Came after ya.” He told her.

She flapped the arm that wasn’t holding her flashlight and knife to her side in frustration and internally cursed her shoddy observation before she began climbing. She was usually so careful to check all around her, every window from every house she would be visible from and yet, Daryl still managed to spot her.

“Thought ya said runs were three to five people.” He reminded her.

“Like you told me before, I’m better on my own.” She commented, passing the flashlight to her other hand and keeping it pointed to the floor. The air was biting and cold compared to the blistering heat during the day. In the shade of the trees, the evenings meant the temperate dropped dramatically and Lexie was glad she had packed some extra layers and supplies.

“Should go back. It’s dangerous out here, especially at night.” Daryl continued.

“I know.” She answered, turning away from him and resuming her path. She heard a sigh and footsteps following on behind her.

 “Stop following me” She snapped. Realizing how rude she sounded. “Please”

“I aint lettin’ ya stay out here on ya own. If I go back n’ ya get yourself killed, that’s on me.” He explained.

“No. It’s on me. I’ll be fine.” She confirmed.

“Naw. I’m coming with ya.” He decided.

She swore under her breath as she carried on trudging through the woods. Now resembling an angry teenager as her footsteps drummed heavily into the dirt and undergrowth. Daryl didn’t say anything for the twenty minutes or so that it took for Lexie to find her way to a row of abandoned shops. She skirted off to the side, around the back of the first building and Daryl tugged his crossbow from over his shoulder and held it equipped in front of him. He kept up his pursuit of her as she began to climb some black, iron stairs at the rear of the building. Spotting some Walkers in the distance, he figured they wouldn’t cause much of a problem provided they remained quiet and out of sight. At the top of the steps, Lexie shoved the door open and strode into the top floor of the building as if she’d been there a million times before. He followed on, scanning the room quickly and lowering his crossbow. The entire top floor was completely empty. A vast open space lined by tall, narrow windows much like a church. In the middle, stood an old, metal trash can that Lexie was filling with newspaper from the floor. Daryl circled her, watching her intensely. She could feel his eyes on her and she wanted to tell him to stop staring at her. Instead, she focused on lighting the paper and setting a small fire inside the trash can that emitted a glowing, flickering light and a surprising amount of warmth. She backed up, turned and sat down opposite the trash can with her back to the wall. From her back pack, she pulled out a blanket, her sketchbook and a small wrap of pencils.

After checking the perimeter of the entire room and peering out of every window while she swung his crossbow by his side, Daryl finally sat in front of her, his back resting on a pillar in the middle of the room. He drew his legs up and rested his arms on them, he placed his crossbow on the floor beside him. He looked at Lexie with confusion and fascination while she spread the blanket over her legs and opened her sketchpad. She noticed his intrigue had increased and figured he wanted answers but didn’t seem to want to ask.

“I like living in Alexandria. But it’s not real.” She confessed. “This is.”

As the fire crackled in the trash can behind him, it occurred to him that he didn’t dislike it here. It was a strange kind of dangerous peace that she sought and he was surprised that he understood that. The fire cast an orange glow on her face and her knitted, slouchy, black hat. Her wavy brown hair framed her face. She wore grey fingerless gloves and a chunky, black scarf over her leather jacket. Daryl was thankful he’d had the sense to also wear a leather jacket under his Angel winged vest.

“I get it” He eventually said. “What ya drawin?”

“The trash can.” She mumbled.

“Ya any good?”

“Probably not.”

“Can I see?”

“You ask a lot of questions for an introvert.” She observed, her eyes flicking up to meet his.

He remembered his comment to her in the armory about her having sass for an introvert. Giving her a small, bashful smile, he leaned his head back on the metal behind him as he pulled out a smoke and lit it. _I’ll take that as a no_. He thought. She was still watching him, her pencil hovering over the pure white page.

“They’ll kill you.” She warned. “Can I bum one?”

He held out the pack and she crawled forwards on all fours, picking one and looking up at him as he held out his lighter and lit it for her. Her light brown eyes caught his attention and he found it hard to look away.

“What?” She breathed.

“Nothin’” he said quickly “You just remind me of someone.”

She shuffled back to her spot and took a long drag on her cigarette before resuming her drawing. She wondered who it could be. Who was it that flashed through his mind when he looked at her? She hoped it wasn’t a bad thing and made a mental note to ask him one day, if she were ever feeling brave enough.

“You should head back. I’m good here.” She said.

“Aint got nothin’ else to do.” He replied.

Lexie bent her knees and used them to rest her pad on. She glared at him over the pages.

“Aren’t you supposed to be on guard with my sister?” She probed.

“She can handle it. She know you come out here?”

“No. I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tell her.”

“Alright.”

What ensued after this was the two of them sat in a strange, comfortable silence for around an hour. Neither of them felt the need to talk and Daryl had to admit he was actually happy to have found someone who didn’t need to fill noiseless moments with mindless chatter and small talk. He glanced up at her a few times but she either didn’t notice or pretended not to. He guessed he could probably have her pegged as somewhat irritable and short tempered and gathered that that she definitely wasn’t comfortable around most people.

Lexie didn’t entirely hate having company for the duration of her night time visit to the abandoned store. Daryl was interesting to her, likeminded somehow and seemed to share her hatred for chit chat, speaking only when he needed to or wanted to know something. She pondered over how he managed to keep his cool around Mel, who she guessed was the kind of person that would usually grate on him, concluding that there was probably a lot more to him than meets the eye.

When she got up to leave, he dutifully followed her without a word and she huffed and puffed and shook her head at him, wishing he’d not bothered to follow her there, but admitting to herself that she was surprised by the decency in him that led him to follow someone he didn’t know into an abandoned building to make sure she didn’t get herself killed.

Back at the bottom of the wall where she had climbed over, she looked over her shoulder at him. He was stood in the shadows of the trees, the light of the moon slightly illuminating his face.

“My sister really likes you.” She sighed, tuning away from him.

“Yeah, I kinda figured that.” He muttered.

“Don’t hurt her. Please.” Lexie pleaded, still facing away from him with her head bowed.

“Not plannin’ on it.” He responded.

She didn’t say anything else, she just grabbed the rope in front of her and climbed up to the first set of metal rungs she had installed on her way down.

 *****

The sniper tower was big enough for two people, it held nothing but two chairs and a small table between them. Sniper shifts were generally the most hated by everyone in the community due to the fact that they were mind numbingly boring unless there were Walkers trying to get in the gate. Even then, sniping was widely discouraged to ensure noise level were kept to a minimum. So, any overzealous Walkers were generally taken out using knives through the gaps in the bars of the gate. Lexie’s gun, a Blaser 93 Tactical, was adapted with a silencer but it only contained a certain percentage of the firing sound. Nevertheless, Lexie always chose it due to the faster action and lighter design than the other rifles they had.

The night was still and she leaned on the white, wooden box that was once a bell tower and now served as the main vantage point to the small town. Below, she could see Daryl and Mel by the gate. Mel flailed her arms around as she spoke and Daryl rocked back and forth on his heels, smiling subtly at whatever story she was telling him.

_Keep your voice down, Mel. This isn’t a nightclub._

She lifted her gaze out to the canopy of trees and the stars that twinkled beyond them. There was still such beauty in the world, even if one had to wait until darkness fell to see it. Lexie was always able to appreciate the elusive delights that were still all around them, even if she never mentioned it. She yawned, blinked rapidly and looked back down at Mel and Daryl, who were now beginning to wander from the gate around the perimeter wall. A look of concern swept across Lexie’s face when she saw Mel stop walking and turn to him. He also halted but with some apprehension. He gripped the strap of his crossbow on his shoulder as Mel stepped closer to him.

_Oh god. No, Mel. Don’t._

She moved closer still and Daryl looked down at her as she placed a hand on the front of his jacket.

_Don’t kiss him, Mel. He won’t let you. This will not end well._

Lexie wanted to lean over the wall of the sniper tower and scream as loud as she could at her sister not to be so impulsive. She wanted to yell at her that he wouldn’t kiss her back. Something inside her just knew that he wouldn’t and that Mel was about to be terribly embarrassed.

She tilted her head up to him and moved in, aiming for his lips. Lexie grit her teeth and curled her lip in a pained expression as Daryl suddenly stepped back.

“Woah, what are ya doin?” He asked.

_Called it._

Mel’s now wide eyes dropped to the floor and she clamped a gloved hand over her mouth. She screwed her face up momentarily and gave herself a few seconds before answering.

“I was going to kiss you, now I’m dying of embarrassment” She mumbled.

“Jesus” He cursed as he awkwardly looked down at the floor and then back up at Mel, who’s face had now turned a deep shade of red. “Sorry. Thought we were just friends.”

Mel quickly turned her back to him, not wanting him to see how humiliated she was and wanting to wait for her cheeks to return to their normal color before facing him again.

“We are. I guess” She affirmed. “I just thought you might have liked me a little more than that.”

When he didn’t reply, Lexie’s pained expression grew worse and she slowly crept her hand to her face, biting down on the knuckles of her fist. She could see him moving about on the spot, as if he were desperately trying to think of a way out of this situation.

“Um…” He started, glancing around their surroundings before continuing. “I aint lookin’ for nothin’ like that.”

Mel turned back to him, purposefully avoiding his gaze and gripping her gun tighter.

“OK. Then let’s just forget that ever happened.” She ordered as she turned her attention back to the path they were walking. She stormed off in front of him and Lexie saw him rub his face with his hand.

“Alright.” He agreed.

Almost able to feel her sister’s humiliation rush through her veins, Lexie stepped back into the darkness of the tower and balled her hands into fists by her sides. She was angry. Angry at Mel for charging in, all guns blazing and thinking Daryl was like every other guy when he quite clearly wasn’t. She was also angry that she hadn’t thought to warn her off of such a brazen and dangerous move so soon.


	4. Chapter 4

When Lexie met Mel back at the house, the usually loud and talkative sister was sat at the dining table with her hands clasped around a mug, staring solemnly at the grain in the wooden tabletop. Lexie shrugged her backpack off in the hall and shut the door, spotting Mel’s discarded jacket, boots, knife and scarf in a pile on the floor. Instead of scolding her for her careless and messy nature, she said nothing and walked over to the table, taking a seat opposite Mel.

Her face was downcast and sadness swept through Lexie when she wouldn’t even look up at her. She could see coffee in the mug that was no longer steaming and she concluded that Mel had been there a reasonable amount of time, nursing an untouched hot drink, her mind unable to focus on anything else.

“What’s wrong?” Lexie questioned, not wanting her sister to know that she had witnessed the entire debacle from the sniper tower. If anything, it would only serve to embarrass her more.

“I tried to kiss Daryl.” She murmured. Mel had never been one for beating around the bush, she would always just come right out with things, believing that honesty was the best policy and wearing her heart on her sleeve.

“I’m guessing he didn’t kiss you back.” Lexie stated.

Mel shook her head slowly and tapped her fingernails on the ceramic of the mug. Lexie felt slightly out of her depth, advice on men and relationships had never been her forte and she didn’t want to make things worse by offering the wrong kind of advice. She wasn’t experienced enough to delve into what she should do next, but she was observant, and that was her strong suit.

“What did he say?” She asked.

“That he’s not looking for that kind of thing.” Mel sighed.

“I uh-can’t say I’m surprised.” Lexie confessed cautiously. She dipped her head in the hope of meeting Mel’s eye. Mel lifted her gaze and gave her a baffled look.

“Why?” She probed.

Lexie took a deep breath and prepared to do some explaining. Conversations like this were unheard of between Lexie and anyone else, Mel knew a side of her that she had never shown to another soul.

“Well, I can tell he’s not like most guys. We don’t know what they went through before they came here, but he did tell me that they lost people. They were all very untrusting of this place and they still are. I think Daryl might still have his guard up but he’s also not like you. He’s reserved and solitary. Independent.”

“Like you” Mel intercepted.

“Maybe, yeah.” Lexie agreed. She had gathered from their night time trip outside the walls that he was more like her than she had expected.  

“You and I get along just fine.” Mel confirmed as she gently slid the coffee along the wooden surface away from her. Tiring of holding it between her hands.

“Yeah, it doesn’t mean you guys won’t get along. It just means you have to be a bit more understanding of the fact that he doesn’t see things the way you do. Also, your usual methods aren’t going to work on him.”

“It doesn’t even matter, I’m not doing guard shifts anymore. It’s too humiliating.” Mel announced.

Lexie could already see where this was going and felt dread set in.

“Oh, no-no Mel, c’mon that’s not fair.” She pleaded.

“Please, Lex? Just cover a few shifts for me? Until I get over the rejection? Please?” Mel begged.

Lexie slumped back in her chair and closed her eyes before opening them again and looking at the ceiling briefly. Usually only one to look out for herself, her sister was her weakness and she hated to see her upset or low.

“I’ll cover three shifts. One week. No more. You’re in the armory.” She negotiated.

Mel smiled and slid her hands across the table, spreading all her fingers out with her palms up. Lexie reluctantly placed her hands in Mel’s and felt her squeeze her fingers firmly.

“You’re a good sister. Thank you.” She whispered.

“You seriously owe me for this” Lexie glowered at her.

“I’ll give you a makeover” Mel smiled.

“That is really not the kind if payback I meant. That is my idea of hell.” Lexie laughed

 *****

Mel’s next guard duty with Daryl was another night shift and while her sister was tucked up in bed away from any potential embarrassment, Lexie was making her way to the gate, where she saw Daryl stood on the platform at the top of the wall. He was finishing a smoke and seemed to be immersed in his own thoughts. The town was silent, not one other person was in sight except for two other guards on the gate.

For some reason she couldn’t quite place, nervousness licked at her mind and she found herself not wanting to do this at all. After spending time with Daryl outside the wall and finding him to be perfectly fine to be around, something in her was creating anxiety that she was finding it hard to ignore.

She climbed the ladder to the platform and saw Daryl glare down at her.

“Where’s Mel?” he questioned.

“I’m covering her shifts this week.” She replied frankly.

Daryl studied her reaction for a moment, sensing her dislike of the fact that she had to be there. Lexie wasn’t one to leave a job unfinished or a shift with no cover, often volunteering to do various things in the absence of other people. Deanna had always praised her for it but both compliments and praise were not things that Lexie was good with. They just made her feel uncomfortable altogether.

She leaned back on the wooden platforms handrail and tugged a protein bar from her pocket. Daryl copied her stance, leaning back and releasing a loud breath from beside her. She opened the wrapper, snapped the bar in half, popped one half in her mouth and held the other out to him.

He stared at the offering in her hand before looking to the side at her. She could feel him looking at her but wasn’t about to return his gaze. She toyed with the wrapper in her hand as she chewed, refusing to look at him. Finally, he plucked it from her grasp and threw it into his mouth.

“Thanks” he said as he chewed.

She swung her backpack from her shoulder and pulled out her sketch book, slipping a pencil from her back pocket. She opened the pages and shifted slightly to the side, the pad tilting up slightly so he couldn’t see what she was drawing. After a while he stood up straight and paced about the platform from one side to the other, occasionally peering over the edge.

“What ya drawin’ this time?”

“That blue car.” She answered.

“Really? It’s all smashed up.” He pointed out.

Lexie didn’t reply for a few seconds while she maneuvered her pencil over the page, crafting a particularly detailed and shaded part of the picture.

“There’s a kind of dark beauty in damaged things.” She expressed.

He nodded and considered her answer, leaning back on the opposite side of the platform’s walls, facing her.

“Ya ever draw people?”

“Only Mel. She hates it but she’s pretty so she’s a good subject.”

He grunted but didn’t say anything else. His vision dropping to the lighter in his hand that he had retrieved from his pocket. He opened and closed the lid, flicking it back and forth, igniting it and putting it out.

“I saw her try to kiss you” Lexie blurted out, shocking even herself with her out of the blue comment on such a touchy subject.

Daryl was silent for a moment before a grumble sounded out from his throat. His hands stopped moving, the lighter pinned between his index finger and thumb. He didn’t like where this was going and little red flags were going up all over the place in his mind.

“You don’t like her?” She asked.

He sighed loudly and resumed his tampering with the lighter, glancing from Lexie to the floor over and over.

“Gettin’ the impression ya gonna waterboard me in a minute.” He jested.

“I might if you don’t answer my question.” She shot back immediately.

“Uh…yeah, I like her.” He admitted. “But not like that.”

Lexie was surprised to feel an altogether unexpected and confusing rush of relief. She had no idea why and decided to put it down to being worried about her sister. But while she knew Mel should technically move on and let it go, she knew this wasn’t the last she would hear on the matter.

“You’ll change your mind. They always do.” She shrugged casually.

“What?” Daryl responded, screwing his face up in a puzzled expression.

“The guys she goes for. They always change their minds” She stated.

Daryl let out an unamused short breath and shook his head.

“Yeah, well not me.” He confirmed.

“We’ll see.” Lexie challenged. She didn’t see his reaction, she was too busy shoving her sketch pad back in her back pack.

“I’m going to walk the wall.” She told him, standing up and beginning to climb down the ladder.

“I’ll come with ya.” He mumbled.

Walking the wall was encouraged once every hour during a four-hour shift to check for any potential problems going on inside the compound. When a perimeter walk was being carried out, the second pair on guard duty kept an eye on the gate. On this particular night it was Eugene and Abraham.

As Lexie’s boots hit the ground at the bottom of the ladder, she looked up to see Eugene gawping at her from the gate, a rifle clutched in his hands. Abraham, who was stood to Eugene’s right was chuckling quietly to himself at his friend’s blatant captivation with her. She pulled both straps of her backpack further up on her shoulders, securing it to her back and headed off to the other side of the gate. Daryl followed a couple of feet behind her.

“Evenin’ Darlin’.” Abraham greeted her as she passed.

“Hey” She replied, offering a small smile.

‘Nice night for a whole lotta standing around doin’ diddly squat.” He grinned.

“Sure is.” Lexie agreed.

“Uh…Evening, Ma’am” Eugene stammered. His eyes were wide, as if he were looking at something completely terrifying. When really, he was just looking at a girl with a backpack and a black, knitted hat. Lexie caught Abraham’s eye and could tell he was desperately trying to hide a laugh, his lips pushed together so tightly she could barely see them through his beard.

“Hi, Eugene.” She answered, opting not to follow up with anything else due to wanting to avoid small talk and get on with her job. She laced her thumbs under the straps of her bag at the front of her shoulders and continued on her path to the Wall.

Daryl nodded a polite hello to them both, stopping when Eugene blocked his path.

“I would like to make a request if you would be so kind as to oblige.” He rambled. “That there female is a delightful combination of intriguing and terrifying and I would be most appreciative if you were to casually enquire if she has a companion and relay the response to me in a timely and most furtive manner.”

Daryl blinked at him before looking at Abraham who had sifted his weight to one side and was resting his hands on the rifle that hung in front of him. His expression was nonchalant but a smile had remained on his lips.

“The hell’s he talkin’ about?” Daryl asked him.

Abraham cleared his throat. “Translation: I want to bone the hot, moody girl. Ask her if she has a boyfriend.”

Daryl scoffed and began to step away. His temper fraying in his chest slightly and catching him off guard.

“Ask her yaself.” He grumbled.

“I am a coward. I know it. You know it. We all know it.” Eugene affirmed.

Daryl rolled his eyes and walked off in the same direction as Lexie.

 

After walking half of the wall, conversation had been non-existent and Lexie had found it to be reasonably relaxing so far. Being around Daryl meant that she didn’t have to constantly worry about what to say next or if she was going to be thought of as rude or ignorant. He had wordlessly offered her a smoke which she had declined and she had offered him her hip flask from her bag in return. He had tried not to look so surprised at the fact that she carried such a thing with her but found he had regarded her with a sense of bafflement for slightly too long.

“Keeps the cold out.” She simply said.

He had taken the flask and downed a gulp of the liquid which he quickly learned was bourbon. He had passed it back, offered a quiet thanks and went back to slowly meandering beside her. As they passed a gap between the houses, Daryl glanced at the gate which was at the other end of the street. Even from their considerable distance away, he could see Eugene watching them.

“Ya got an admirer.” He said.

“Hmm?” She said, being pulled out of a daydream in which she imagined she was outside the wall instead of having to do Mel’s guard shift.

“Eugene. Wants to know if ya got a guy.”

Lexie laughed quietly to herself. It was typical really. She was never interested in anyone and the only men that seemed to be captivated by her were either egotistical or downright strange. Not that it mattered to her anyway, her focus had never been on the opposite sex and anyone that pursued her was usually wasting their time.

“I don’t and I don’t want one.” Was her short and to the point answer.

“Fair enough.” He grunted.

As she walked beside him, she realised there were things she wanted to know about him. Usually not one for asking probing questions, she was intrigued at her own curiosity about him and how once she had asked a question, their conversation seemed to flow between them a lot easier than it did with anyone else.

“How did you learn to hunt?” She asked.

“My ol’ man and my brother. Used to live up in the mountains.” He replied. “You?”

“Same as you. My dad. He tried to get Mel interested but it’s not her thing.”

“She said ya aint biological sisters” he relayed.

“Yeah, her parents adopted me when I was 8.” She explained

“Really? Know much about ya real parents?”

“I do” She said, pausing for a moment and weighing up the possible ramifications of disclosing such personal information. She figured it didn’t really matter if he knew things about her, it was the apocalypse, nothing in the past mattered much anymore anyway.

“My mother was an alcoholic. My father was an adulterer. I was the result of a short and intense affair while my fathers wife was pregnant. But my mom never told him about me until she got to the point where she couldn’t cope with a kid on her own anymore. She took me to his place and I remember watching from the car as they yelled at one another. He said he didn’t want anything to do with me in case his wife found out what he did. My mother gave me up after that. She neglected me, I was starving. I guess booze was more important. I went into a foster home and broke my arm at 7 years of age. The nurse that looked after me in the hospital was Mel’s mom. She got attached to me. The adoption went through a year later.”

Daryl’s eyebrows were raised when she finally braved a look at him.

“I don’t know why I just told you all that. I barely know you. Sorry.” She apologised, feeling awkward and mad at herself for not being able to stop talking once she’d started.

“Naw, s’fine. Must have been rough.” He guessed.

“At times. I believe in the old cliché ‘everything happens for a reason.’ I wasn’t meant to be with my biological mother and I was meant to break my arm when I was 7. It gave me a family.”

“Guess you’re right.” He agreed.

Lexie began picking at the black nail polish on her fingernails as she walked, digging away at it and flicking the residue away.

“You going to tell me about you? That’s what we’re doing here, right?” She reasoned.

“Aint nothin’ to tell” he mumbled. “Just some redneck asshole”

Lexie almost stopped in her tracks at his blunt and somewhat sad comment but she forced herself to keep walking and not appear too startled. She used the time it took for him to retrieve a smoke and light it to try think of a response but ended up saying the first thing that appeared in her mind.

“That’s bullshit.” She said under her breath.

“Yeah? How ya know that? Said it yourself ya barely know me” he wondered.

“I can tell. If that were true, Aaron wouldn’t have scouted you, Deanna wouldn’t have let you in, I wouldn’t have let my sister go anywhere near you and I would have shot you when you followed me over the wall.”

He half smiled as he blew smoke in the opposite direction to her, being careful not to cloud her with it and to shield his reaction to her mild and well disguised compliment. He hadn’t met anyone like Lexie before and he had to admit, he didn’t entirely disagree with Eugene. There was something about her that was fascinating. 

“There’s a lot more to you than you show people” She mused, catching his eye. “I’m the same.”

There and then was the start of a series of conversations that night that left Lexie more and more inquisitive about the mysterious archer her sister was so taken by. They conversed easily, not feeling the need to carry on filling the gaps if they didn’t want to. He’d told her all about his group and she had given him a brief rundown of some of the townsfolk, who to avoid and who would be useful to him. All in all, when the end of their shift arrived, both Daryl and Lexie had actually had an enjoyable evening in each other’s company.

 *****

Lexie finished up her weeks cover of guard duty with Daryl and felt an unfamiliar sense of disappointment when her last shift had finished. They had discovered they shared similar interests in music, films and their outlook on life. Lexie had even given him a run down and analysis of the book Deanna had leant her and he had listened carefully to every single word, watching her face as she spoke and looked out at her surroundings as she thought. He couldn’t say he was actually interested in the contents of the book but he was happy to sit and listen to her talk. He would allow himself a glimpse of her occasionally. Her eyes and facial features were both distracting and alluring to him, his memories being stirred from a time way back when.

As a result of the extra time spent together, Daryl and Lexie had quickly built up a kind of friendship of sorts which had mildly irritated Mel when she had heard them pass by the house one night, swapping tips on how to bring down deer on the hunt. She had ranted and raved when her sister got back about how he seemed to be able to talk to her with ease but with Mel, everything seemed a little false.

Lexie had brushed it off as nothing, explaining that they simply had similar personalities and that she was reading too much into things. But Mel had persisted with her plan to win Daryl over, bringing up her party idea once more and only letting it drop when Lexie had told her that she would think about it.  

Another week had passed and Aaron and Daryl had been tasked with recruiting runs which meant they spent a lot of time away together. Mel and Lexie had been at Eric’s almost every night when Mel wasn’t on guard with some poor soul who had to put up with her incessant chatter about the archer that didn’t know he was into her yet. United in the temporary loss of Aaron, the three of them ate dinner together regularly and played poker as a distraction.  

 *****

At an abandoned gas station, Daryl siphoned gas from an old, beat up truck while Aaron patrolled around him in a circle, checking for Walkers and keeping his eyes peeled for any other people. They were on their way back to Alexandria after being awake for almost 24 hours. Every time they had tried to stop to rest, they would be bombarded with Walkers and would have to pack up and leave. Aarons bones literally ached and he longed to be back in the comforts of Alexandria. While he did the towns recruiting and spent many hours out on the road, Daryl was more accustomed to the harsh life that was living outside the walls and Aaron hadn't even seen him flinch or tire once. He admired his stamina, his determination and his belief that if they just kept trying, they would find someone eventually. The two had got along well during their time away and like Lexie, Daryl found Aaron easy to be around due to the lack of pressure to be something he wasn’t. He had been tasked with recruiting because it suited who he was and Aaron was more than aware of that, having recommended him for the job himself during a meeting with Deanna.

“So, what’s going on with you and Mel?” Aaron questioned out of the blue. Daryl stilled and looked up from where he was holding a plastic tube into a gas can.

“Nothin’. Aint seen her in a while” He said

“She seems pretty keen on you.” Aaron prodded, his face breaking into a sly smirk.

“Stop. Had all this from Lexie.” Daryl complained

“Ahh the protective younger sister. I take it she warned you off?” He continued.

“What’s with the third degree, man?” Daryl snapped as he took the tube out from the can and fastened the lid.

“I’m just curious is all” Aaron chuckled.

Daryl approached the motorcycle he had been given by Aaron and Eric for trips such as the one they were on. They had found it in their garage when they had moved into Alexandria and neither of them had a clue how to use it and so had collected parts in the hope that one day, someone would arrive that could put it to good use. Deanna had told them that Daryl used to ride and he had been bowled over by the gesture after having lost his previous motorcycle in the last place the group was holed up. He heaved the gas can onto the back of the bike, fastening it to the pillion seat and checking it was strapped in properly. Looking over his shoulder, he saw Aaron making tracks towards him, heading for his car that was parked on the other side of the Bike.

“She tried to kiss me.” Daryl admitted. Aaron froze to the spot and his mouth dropped open in his best display of fake shock. Of course, Mel had told him what had happened before and he had promised her he wouldn’t breathe a word to anyone.

“Ok, wait. What?!” he exclaimed in his forced, shocked voice.

“Yup.” Daryl sighed as Aaron began to chuckle again.

“Well, did you kiss her back?” He demanded.

“No”

“Why?” 

“I aint into her like that. Not exactly on the top of my list of priorities either” He expressed. Aaron gave him a sympathetic look and nodded in agreement.

“Hope you let her down gently.” He said.

“I dunno if I did or not. I aint good with this stuff.” Daryl confessed. “Lexie covered Mel’s shifts last week. Kinda obvious why.”

Aaron slapped Daryl’s shoulder as he passed and reached the car “My advice? Be honest with her. She’s not used to being rejected, so it might take a while to sink in. But it’s better than her hounding you constantly. Should talk to Lexie about the best way to approach it. You guys seem to get along well.”

Daryl dug around in his pockets for his motorcycle key, furrowing his brow.

“Yeah, she’s cool. We got shit in common.” He said absentmindedly.

“It’s been nice to see her talking to someone other than me, Eric and Mel. She’s an interesting girl. If we find anyone else out here, I think we should be looking for people like her. She kept Mel alive for months before I found them. Just like you and Rick with your group. She can be a little irritable and she's full of attitude, but other than that, she's the ideal apocalypse survivor.”

Fining his key in his back pocket, Daryl looked up at Aaron, considering his words and flicked his head, helping the breeze to move his hair from his eyes.

“Yeah. I’m down with that.” He affirmed.

He was. More people like Lexie seemed appealing to him. No acting out, pretending to to be something else other than herself, no useless small talk, a curious, courageous nature and enough logic and street smarts to have kept both her and Mel alive on the outside. Yes, he could definitely spend time trying to find people similar to her.

*****

Six shelves staked with books. Next to it, another six shelves. Everything from encyclopaedia’s to dictionaries to fiction to true crime. It was a mini library that boasted some all-time classics along with some controversial and simply terrible titles. Lexie’s eyes hovered over the titles from her spot on the chesterfield. Voices from others in the room became muffled and quiet as her concentration waned and her attention focused on the books she hadn’t managed to get around to reading yet. This was always the case when she sat in Deanna’s living room, no matter how important the reason was for her being summoned there, she would always sit and gaze at the books, longing to be allowed to slip into the escapism and alternate realities she so craved.

“Lexie?” said a voice, cutting through her daydreaming. “Lexie. Are you with us?” Deanna’s voice.

Lexie looked up at the staring faces of Glenn, Michonne and Daryl, While Deanna circled around the coach she was sat on, looking down at her.

“I’m sorry, what?” Lexie asked.

Michonne and Glenn exchanged a glance, both of them smiling to one another while Daryl was busying himself picking up ornaments and trinkets from the desk and examining them, his eyebrows pinched together.

“I want you all to visit a nearby park.” Deanna announced “From memory, it had a petting zoo inside along with a small restaurant. If there are any animals left, we should bring them back here along with any useful tools. I also have some pages from a book with pictures of herbs and specific plants that we can use both for cooking and medicinal purposes, this particular park was known for it's array of regional plants and we need to collect as many as we can to start growing our own. I have chosen you all for your individual skills.”

She opened a map and pinned it to a wall, below a family photo, before circling the area in red pen. "Right here. Around 3 hours drive."

“We should go in pairs, cover more ground that way” Glenn suggested. Michonne nodded in agreement and Lexie’s eyes shifted to peer at Daryl, who was now calmly leaning back against Deanna’s desk instead of examining everything on it.

“Lexie and Daryl both have hunting experience. Maybe they should focus on finding the herbs and plants on the list? Glenn, Rick tells me you are excellent and getting in and out of places and scavenging and Michonne, you are an extremely capable fighter. Of course, how you do this is up you all of you. I’m just voicing a suggestion.”

“I agree” Michonne said “Daryl is more knowledgeable about the woods than anyone, Lexie should go with him. So, Glenn and I will cover the petting zoo and see what food we can recover. That OK with you?” She asked Lexie, who was sat watching everyone with a blank expression.

“Sure” She shrugged.

“I’ll take the bike.” Daryl offered “Meet y’all at the gate.” With that, he stood and left the room before anyone else could say anything.

 

Lexie had collected weapons from the armoury for everyone, written all their names down and marked her map, showing Mel where they were going. Mel had confessed to being jealous of Lexie getting to spend so much time with Daryl but Lexie had just shrugged and mentioned their somewhat similar skills. As Mel watched Lexie head for the door, her arms full of weapons, she called out to her.

“Can we please have a party, lex?”

Lexie stopped and slowly released a breath, grumbling low in her throat with irritation.

“I told you, I’m thinking about it.” She said over her shoulder before leaving the armory.

 *****

Lexie had ridden in the backseat of the truck that was driven by Glenn. Michonne took the passenger seat and after a couple of attempts to make conversation, she had quickly realised that Lexie wasn’t a big talker. Instead, she intermittently passed potato chips over her shoulder which were gratefully received each time. The journey had taken around two and a half hours and Daryl had led the way on his motorcycle, the sound of the engine roaring along the roads and causing Lexie to shake her head at the notion that Walkers were attracted by noise, yet Daryl still insisted on riding his bike. When they pulled into a narrow lane and parked up, Lexie hopped out of the truck and retrieved a Glock 17 and a Smith and Wesson M2.0 from her bag. She slipped them into two holsters on her belt.

“Alright, radio check?” Michonne prompted.

Everyone checked their radios were switched on, turned to the correct frequency and the volume turned up. Lexie clipped hers back to her tactical belt which held her hunting knife, guns and several pouches for carrying small items. She wore a dark green T-shirt a black baseball cap and camouflage pants with a black, hooded jacket. The air had a bite to it, leaves had fallen and a new season was setting in. Soon, she would have to start wearing more layers, scarves, and gloves to protect her from the cold.

“Aim to meet back here in a couple hours, check in if the plan changes.” Glenn added, getting a quick nod from everyone before he headed off with Michonne.

 

Lexie glanced in the opposite direction. She figured she would have one hell of a quiet day wandering along beside Daryl but happened to be looking forward to a peaceful job, provided the Walkers kept their distance.

After 20 minutes of Walking, Daryl had been studying the pages that Deanna had given him, ripped from books. She had a simple knowledge of the kinds of things they were looking for, but knew she would need to rely on Daryl for the most part. He was walking slightly in front of her and she could smell the smoke and leather on him as she wandered along downwind. When he veered off to the left, Lexie followed on behind him, seeing him hold a page up in front of him.

“Got something?” She asked, quickly checking their surroundings after hearing a guttural growling sound some distance away. She could see a Walker stumbling through the trees in the distance behind them, too far away to be of any cause for concern.

“Yeah, Yellowroot.” He replied as he swooped down and ripped the plant from the earth. Lexie plucked something fabric from her belt and shook it out, revealing a bag. She held it open and Daryl dropped the plant inside.

“One down, 29 more to go.” He muttered.

“What does Yellowroot do?” Lexie enquired.

“Helps with stomach and mouth issues.” He informed her. “Here, make yourself useful, take a couple pages.”

He held out the paper to her, seeing her roll her eyes as she took them from him.

“That’s what I like about our dynamic” She said “No pleasantries. Just straight down to business.”

Daryl smirked at her as she traipsed off ahead of him, reading through the words on the page and attempting to memorize the faded drawings. She kicked at the leaves on the ground as she walked. When Daryl passed her again, she spotted a large pile of leaves ahead of her. Digging the toe of her boot in as she stepped, she flicked the dried, crispy shapes from the floor and aimed at Daryl’s legs. He froze when he saw the sudden onslaught appear at his feet and heard her giggling to herself and shuffling about in the pile like a child behind him. Glancing over his shoulder, he saw the look on her face, a broad smile that was cast down at the floor. Appearing lost in her own little world, she hadn’t noticed him pick up leaves of his own, a huge armful in fact. He lifted his arms, walked towards her and dumped them on her head. She gasped as they cascaded all over her, her mouth dropping open and her legs automatically stepping back.

“Oh my god!” She cried “Daryl!”

“What? Can dish it out but ya can’t take it? Huh?” He prodded as he began to chuckle at her while she picked dried leaves and stones from her hair and clothes and shot him a fake angry look, her cheeks burning slightly which only left her wondering why.

“I win” He told her..

They carried on walking, soon interrupted by a Walker lunging out from a nearby dense part of the wooded area. Lexie took it out with no issues, slipping her knife from her belt and dashing towards it without a second thought. Daryl had raised his crossbow but decided instead to observe Lexie’s Walker killings skills for himself. The corpse was tall, much taller than her, but it’s towering height and grabbing hands did nothing to scare Lexie off. She kicked out at its legs, hearing a bone snap as it toppled backwards and crashed to one knee. She noticed its hand as it grabbed out at her, a wedding ring. He was married. _I’m sorry._ She thought as she plunged the knife through his eye, penetrating his skull.

Satisfied that she could handle herself and needed no assistance from him, Daryl carried on walking, slowly ambling along and scanning the shrubs and plants around them. Lexie wiped her knife on a rag she had pulled from one of the pockets on her belt and returned it to its holster. She raised her vision to the canopy of branches above them that was casting heavy shadows on their path.

“Who taught ya close combat like that?” he mumbled to her, his voice so causal and quiet that Lexie could just about hear the question.

“No one. I’m terrible at it.” She responded.

“Aint what I just saw.” He stated.

She knew how to take out Walkers. She had done it hundreds of times before but was still unable to shake the stab of sadness she felt with every one she put down and she wasn’t without her faults. Her technique was questionable and she often found herself having to back up and attack from a different angle or run away altogether. What she was sure of, was that if she were ever attacked by a living human, she would not be able to fight them off.

“I could use some pointers.” She admitted.

Daryl considered offering to help her. While he wasn’t properly trained in martial arts, he was a scrapper who had been in more fights than he could count and figured he could teach her what she needed to know about defence at least. But something in him was reluctant, his naturally withdrawn personality suffocating his desire to spend more time with Lexie.

“Should ask Carol. She’s pretty good with a knife.” He told her.

“OK, thanks. I will.” She affirmed, bending down to collect another plant from the list.

“Mel still likes you, y’know.” She explained as she tugged the plant from the ground and placed it in the bag. When he looked over at Daryl, he was staring at her with an air of suspicion.

“OK” She said, holding her hands up in surrender “Look, I won’t mention it again if there’s a chance you could change your mind.”

He rubbed over his face with his hand, his eyes casting up to the sky in exasperation. He considered asking her advice on how to make this whole thing with Mel go away, but suspected Carol may be the better choice, being uninvolved.

“There aint no chance.” He sighed before turning and continuing to trudge through the woods.

“She not your type?” Lexie pressed.

“I aint got a type.” He said.

“Everyone has a type.” She commented casually. He stopped and turned to her, his eyes flashed with anger for a second.

“Do you?” He asked.

Lexie hesitated. Uncomfortable with the way he was glaring at her. She had hit a nerve and regretted her decision to bring up the subject. Now, she was faced with her own personal question thrown back at her.

“No. I guess I don’t.” She uttered.

As they stood there and stared at one another, she observed his bright blue eyes, his dirty, floppy hair and his greying beard and it occurred to her that he was likely to be considerably younger than he actually looked. The horrors of the world having taken their toll. Loss, trauma and survival had aged everyone. Even Lexie, who now in her 30’s, sometimes caught herself in the mirror and didn’t even recognise the woman staring back at her.

“Like I said, I aint got a type.” He snapped, carrying on into the trees.

She didn’t respond. Then, time had passed. A lot of time. It was the only occasion that Lexie had felt that the quiet between her and Daryl was awkward. She hadn’t meant to irritate him but knew she had when he’d increased the distance between them as they made their way through the trees. She flicked her thumbnails against the underside of her index finger in a nervous tic.

Lexie’s bag of plants was getting more and more full and they would be returning to Deanna with an impressive result. She hoped that Michonne and Glenn had managed to get some rewards of their own. The sky was beginning to darken and the air was getting colder. She zipped up her jacket and pulled her sleeved down over her hands.

When Daryl sat on a fallen tree trunk and lit a smoke, Lexie hovered awkwardly nearby, not knowing where to put herself or even how to act now she knew she had annoyed him. She chose to wander back and forth, her eyes fixed to the floor, watching as the mossy ground beneath her boots created craters under her weight. She wondered if she should try and speak to him again, change the subject onto something easier to digest. Or maybe she should just kick more leaves at him. The latter, she concluded was likely to make the situation even worse, but she did intend to try and get him back for his earlier win. She stopped walking and leaned against a tree.

“You like the bike Aaron and Eric gave you?” She tried.

He nodded and raised his vision to her from the cigarette he was rolling between his middle finger and thumb.

“Yeah. It’s a good bike.” He expressed.

“Aaron said you had one before. What was it?” She continued, pleased that he seemed to have simmered down and had lost his tense and snappy demeanour.

“A Triumph. Was my brothers.” He replied.

Lexie began picking at her nail polish. She had only reapplied it the night before, opting to wear it in the first place purely because she enjoyed the process of chipping at all away again.

“My father had bikes. Three of them. Used to take me on road trips.” She told him.

“Yeah? What bikes?” His face seemed to brighten slightly.

“Two Triumphs and a Ducati, for when he wanted to tear about like a degenerate.” She smiled.

Daryl laughed quietly, smoke puffing out from his nostrils as he tapped ash onto the ground.

“He used to take me on road trips. Mel was never interested. So, it was just the two of us. I miss those days.” She reminisced.

He wanted to ask her if she wanted to ride back to Alexandria with him. To indulge in a blast from the past. But thought against it, shyness taking precedence over everything else.

Lexie wondered why it was that she always felt so nosey when she was around him. Why she wanted to ask so many questions and find out more about him. She had little desire to know anything about anyone else but in Daryl’s company, the urge to ask questions was almost overwhelming.

It hadn’t gone unnoticed by Daryl. Expecting her to speak only when spoken to right from the start, she had been curious, spirited and had shown that she had a sense of humour. He knew it wasn’t likely that she was like that with many other people and so could only take it as a good thing that she felt comfortable enough around him to let her personality show through the cracks in her withdrawn exterior.

So much so, in fact, that as they moved off and resumed walking she had found her self another row of gathered leaves under the treeline which she was now kicking at Daryl again, a playful grin on her face. Daryl turned on his heels and began kicking them back at her furiously, the two of them wordlessly immersed in a strange childish battle. Noticing her giggle, he swooped down, gathered more in his arms and threw them over her head again. In retaliation, she stepped towards him, grabbed fistfuls of the leaves and threw them at him, stumbling on a rock in the process and falling forwards. He caught her arms as she fell, steadying her. When she looked up, her breath hitched in her throat at the realisation that she was pressed against him, her forearms in his grasp. A ghost of a smile still on his lips.

“Ya OK?” He said.

“Yeah. Sorry. I fell. Um…thanks, for the uh…stopping me thing.” He stammered, pulling her arms from his grasp.

“Sure.” He said, stepping back and clearing his throat. “I won that round too. Just sayin’.”

“There’s always next time.” She smiled up at him.

Try as he might, he found himself weakened by her eyes and noticed them every time she looked at him. Not to mention the way her hair fell and the shape of her nose and lips. She was so familiar he could honestly say it hurt. He would steal glances whenever he could as they walked side by side, all the while wishing he could just turn back the clock and go back to the many months before.

When Glenn radioed and informed them that he and Michonne were on their way back to the truck, Daryl and Lexie also turned back to the rendezvous point. Chatter was non-existent on the way back. Lexie’s mind was firmly on Mel and how obsessed she had become with this man. She wondered if she should just say yes to her party idea and hope that Daryl would come around to Mel’s persuasive ways.

The truck was empty when they arrived and Lexie threw the bag of plants and herbs into the back seat. Daryl leaned against the truck, his eyes following Lexie as she tried to balance on a long, branch that had fallen from a tree. Gently placing one boot in front of the other on the rickety, rounded wood, she wobbled from side to side, holding her arms out to stabilise herself. When her boot slipped and she staggered off of the wood, she reached out and grabbed a nearby tree trunk. She heard him try to say something, before he stopped himself and she opted not to acknowledge it to spare him the uneasy feeling. She yawned, covering her mouth and shook her head, trying to wake herself up.

“You wanna ride back with me?” Daryl suddenly said. “On the bike.”

“Really?” She asked, her mouth quirking up at the side.

“Yeah. I mean, ya don’t have to. Just thought-’.”  

“I’d like that” She grinned. “Thanks”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the love so far! :)

Riding back to Alexandria with Daryl had been an experience Lexie was grateful for. She had loved the feeling of the wind in her hair, taking her hat off so she could feel its full force before it got so cold she had to duck behind Daryl for a break. Her arms stayed firmly clamped around his waist and she held onto his leather vest at the front. The feeling of freedom from being on a bike flooded back to her and she remembered her father and all the trips they took. Every winding road they sped around and every biker bar they’d stopped at for a drink before continuing their journey. It was always bonding time to Lexie, who needed to bond with her parents more than Mel in order to quell the constant, nagging feeling that they would abandon her like her mother did. But they proved to be loving loyal and selfless and as a result, Lexie had grown up to be independent and self-reliant.

Mel was sat outside the armoury when Daryl pulled up on the bike, allowing Lexie to dismount the vehicle and turn in her guns to her sister. Mel’s face was plastered with a gigantic, false smile as Lexie dismounted the bike.

“Thanks, for the ride. Was fun.” She told him.

“No problem. Was a good run.” He replied.

Mel stood and looked from Lexie to Daryl and back again. Her smile faded slightly and Lexie picked up on it straight away. Feeling awash with pity for her sister and her lack of being able to spend any decent time with the man she had a major crush on, she tried to think of a way to help.

“Daryl” She said, turning to him “We’re having a party, to welcome the newcomers. Wednesday night. You should come.”

“We are?” Mel asked, her voice laced with surprise.

“Yes. We are.” Lexie shot at her. Mel’s face brightened when she realised what Lexie was doing and that they were having a party after all.

“Right! We are! Tomorrow night, of course! I forgot. Yeah, it’d be good to see you there.” Mel added.

Daryl shifted in his motorcycle seat, his hand still clasped around the throttle. The bike purred and ticked over under him.

“Parties aint my thing.” He grumbled.

“They’re not mine either.” Lexie agreed. “But I have to go, it’s my house. So, it’s only fair that you have to endure it too.”

He thought for a second, looking around him at the street and back at Glenn and Michonne, who had now pulled up to the side of the street behind him. They were unloading guns from the back of the truck.

“I’ll think about it.” He nodded to Lexie, avoiding Mel altogether.

*****

The next day brought with it a guard shift for Mel and Daryl. Mel’s first one since Lexie had covered for her for a week. She had buzzed around the house with a new-found determination and positive attitude around her pursuit of Daryl. Lexie had temporarily wished she had a remote that could shut her sister up at the press of a button but since she had both agreed to the party and invited Daryl at the same time, Mel had been on her case non-stop.

Lexie had decided to sit her down and have a serious and honest talk about Daryl and what he was like. She had informed her that he wasn’t going to be won over by a short skirt and the flutter of some eyelashes. He was deeper than that, complicated and from what she could tell, short tempered. She had made her promise that if he told her no again, that she would let it go. Mel had eventually agreed but Lexie knew her better than she knew herself, the pull and thrill of the chase too exciting for her to just give up and she recognised that she may have to do a little more persuading. That’s if she were even still around by that point.

As time had gone on, Lexie had begun to feel more and more at home outside the walls of Alexandria. Not wanting to grow lazy and complacent had led to her spending most nights in the abandoned store and on the back roof of her house, wishing she were out there where things were terrifying, dangerous and horrific, but they were true and real and not acknowledging that may as well be a signature on a death certificate to her. She loved Mel more than anything or anyone, but she was safe in Alexandria and that was all Lexie had ever wanted for her since the turn. Somewhere for her to be safe, happy and herself. It was her safe haven, but it wasn’t Lexie’s.

As she shaded the drawing she had started the night that Daryl had followed her, she felt her hand fall away from the page and her concentration wander. She flipped the pad closed and placed it on the floor beside her as she observed the smoke from the fire in the trash can billow up to the middle of the room and escape through a nearby window that had wooden boards hammered across it. The store’s top floor still resembled a giant refrigerator, even with the fire blazing in the metal cylinder which forced her to readjust her scarf and pull her woollen hat down over her hears. Her breath billowed out as she breathed in a fleeting, white cloud.

She didn’t want to leave Mel. But she had felt nothing but anxiety for months inside the walls of the community. Maybe she wasn’t cut out for the elements of the old world anymore. Maybe this new world was what suited her best. She had toyed with the idea of moving to the store for a while, just visiting Alexandria instead of living there full time, but she knew Deanna wouldn’t allow it if she found out, seeing Lexie as a valuable member of their town, she would only convince her to stay.

The door clicked shut and Lexie reached for her gun which was next to her.

“Relax, It’s me.” Daryl rasped.

She didn’t look up, merely moving her hand back away from the gun and leaning her head back on the wall, her eyes still focused on the trash can.

“This is becoming a habit.” She said.

He slid down the wall opposite her, keeping one leg bent in front of him and setting his crossbow down on the floor beside him. He mirrored her positioning, tilting his head back and narrowing his eyes, but instead of the trash can, he was looking right at her.

“Thought I’d find ya here.” he commented.

“You were looking for me? Lucky me” She said sarcastically, still peering at the smoke rising up in dancing clouds to the window.

“Told ya before, shouldn’t be out here by yourself.” He mumbled.

“I can handle it.” She responded, now tearing her eyes from the trash can and picking up her sketch pad again. She flipped it open and continued drawing.

“I know. I guess I kinda like it here too.” He admitted. “I’ll leave…if ya want me to.”

“You’re here now.” She shrugged. “Just stay.”

Daryl could tell she was downcast, something about her was distracted and he could see it in her eyes when she looked up at him every now and then between sketching.

“What’s up?” He asked.

Instead of answering him, she looked up at him and completely stilled. How could he tell she had something on her mind? She hadn’t said anything or acted any differently to normal aside from one throwaway, sarcastic comment. Her expression was serious but behind her eyes he could see a certain uneasiness that told him she wasn’t used to anyone being able to read her so well.

“Aint gotta tell me.” He assured her.

She swallowed hard, her vision dropping as she thudded her pencil onto the page and sighed loudly.

“Been thinking of leaving.” She admitted.

“Leavin’ Alexandria?” He asked “Why?”

Out of everyone, she figured Daryl would be the only one to understand her reasoning and so she had chosen to share her dilemma in the hope that he could maybe shed some light on what she should do.

“Yeah. I only ever wanted to find somewhere safe for Mel to live. She loves it there. Me…I’m just constantly anxious. There’s nothing keeping me there. I love Aaron and Eric, they’re good friends, but they’re not enough to stop me wanting to go. Besides Mel, I don’t think anyone would miss me anyway. I’m better out here, alone. Just need to hone my knife skills and a few other things and I might just…go.”

Daryl could relate. He had felt like that numerous times since arriving and he had only been there a few weeks compared to Lexie. Regardless of that fact, he was still apprehensive about offering an opinion to someone he hadn’t known long.

“What about Mel?” He asked with some trepidation.

“She’d understand. Eventually.” She replied.

He nodded, unable to argue with her after having once said the same thing about Carol when he’d once chosen to go off with his brother and leave the group. Only he soon realised where he belonged and it was not wandering the wilderness without the group. So, he had returned and Carol had never expressed her anger at him leaving, she was simply glad he’d gone back. He could only hope that Mel would do the same for Lexie, but something told him that her reaction wouldn’t be the same as Carol’s.

“Think about it first.” He suggested, refraining from volunteering anything else.

She glanced up at him, a small smile tugging at her lips. She felt better for confessing and had every faith that what she had told him would go no further. Returning to what had become one of their regular quiet moments, Lexie finished up as much of her sketch as she could concentrate on before picking up her book. He caught sight of the front cover as she opened it.

“What’s that about?” He queried.

“You really want to know or are we just chatting?” She challenged

“Both I guess”

“You read?”

“Don’t have to if ya tell me what it’s about.”

Her eyes met his and she tried to hide a smile but failed. Daryl felt a sense of accomplishment when he noticed her amusement at his reply.

“Good point.” She stated. “Fine. It’s The Collector by John Fowles. He was an English author. It’s kind of a dark book, but it raises lots of issues.”

“Like what?”

She shook her head, a smile still on her face. He had listened to her talk about what she was reading before but she had been convinced that he wasn’t really listening. Now it occurred to her that he may actually like to hear her take on things and would actually listen after all.

“Like social class. The protagonist, Frederick Clegg grows up in a lower class household. He wins this soccer competition in the UK and gets all this money. It’s enough for him to fulfil his wildest dreams about the woman he’s obsessed with. The upper-middle class Miranda. Clegg collects butterflies….”

She paused to check he was still interested, his head was slightly tilted to the side and his body was completely still. He was listening to every word.

“…he’s proud of his collection. He knows that he will never be able to be with Miranda because of their class divide, so he kidnaps her and keeps her in a room that he’s made under his house using the money he won. She’s like a part of his collection. A beautiful, rare trophy that he both marvels at and terrifies all at once. Obviously, she tries multiple times to escape but he won’t let her go. That’s where another theme comes in, prison.”.

She stopped again, looking down at the book in her lap and running her fingers over the image on the cover.

“I could relate to the imprisonment part. Feeling like you’re trapped. You can’t just fly away. He showers her with gifts. Artwork, food, perfume, you name it. He photographs her, but he doesn’t attack her. But those home comforts don’t make her happy. Her freedom does.”

“Like Alexandria” he commented.

“Yeah, like Alexandria.” She replied thoughtfully.

“This guy, this Clegg guy. Sounds like a psycho.” He expressed.

Lexie smiled again “I suppose he is. But he’s also in love. It’s not in the conventional sense but it’s the only way he knows how to be. It drives him to commit an unimaginable crime. He sees Miranda as so socially out of his league that he knows he would never be able to be with her any other way.”

Daryl was nodding and she wasn’t sure if it was through agreement of her interpretation or for some other reason.

“Love makes people do crazy things. Well, apparently. I wouldn’t know.” She shrugged.

“It does” he mumbled.

Lexie caught his eye, desperately trying to read his cloaked expression through his hair. She wondered why he had said it but was glad he had. Now he seemed more open in a way. From such a small confession had come a huge revelation. He had been in love before.

“You should read it” She suggested “you might like it. Parts of it spoke to me.”

“Don’t need to. It already spoke to me though you. I get the class divide thing. I mean, I ain’t hidden no women in no basements or nothin’, but I know what it’s like to not feel good enough for someone because of where I’m from or how I was brought up, or dragged up.”

It dawned on Lexie that they had reached a kind of even keel, she had confessed her desire to leave Alexandria, and she had trusted him with that knowledge. In turn, he had admitted he had been in love before and also divulged that he had struggled with a class divide of his own.  She was glad he had asked about her book, it had resulted in a different kind of understanding between them. A deeper one that neither of them had anticipated.

“For what it’s worth, I think you turned out OK.” She uttered, her words nothing more than a shy whisper from across the room. But he had heard them.

“Thanks” he replied.

Deciding it was time to leave, she packed her bag and got to her feet, swinging her bag over her shoulder. Daryl collected his crossbow and stood up.

“Stay, if you want. You don’t have to escort me.” She said over her shoulder as she headed to the door.

“I want to.” He blurted out.

She looked back at him, surprised. His eyes flashed with a brief spell of panic while he realised how he sounded.

“I mean, Like I said before, get yourself killed n’ it’s on me.” He corrected quickly.

 

They walked back through the trees, Daryl following behind Lexie. It felt strange to follow someone else when he was usually out at the front of the group. The expert tracker with the excellent sense of direction. Always on the lookout for something to hunt and eat. Now, after moving in on her almost nightly routine, he respected her need to keep control of things and acted as a visitor on her trips. When they reached the wall, she turned to him, her lips parted as if she wanted to say something.

“Thank you.” She managed, keeping her eyes on the floor, then in the dark trees, anywhere but his face.

“What for?” he asked.

“Listening. Listening to me complain and harp on about my book.” She stated.

He kicked some dirt around with his boots.

“Don’t be stupid. S’been good.” He mumbled in response.

Not wanting him to see the huge smile that was threatening to spread across her face, She turned back to the wall and began to climb.

 *****

When Lexie got back to the house, she climbed the ladder to the back of the roof and crept into her bedroom through the open window. She placed her bag on a chair and shrugged off her coat and boots in the darkness. On the dresser were two candles and a lighter, she picked the lighter up and lit the candles, casting a dim glow across the room. As her gaze scanned the mirror, she jumped and grabbed for her knife when she saw a figure sat on her bed. She dropped the weapon when she realised it was Mel.

“Jesus, Mel. What are you doing in here?” She breathed, trying to catch her breath.

“Where have you been?” Mel asked, her voice taut and angry.

“Out. I just went for a walk.” Lexie said.

“In the middle of the night?”

“You know I don’t sleep much. I was restless.”

“I was worried.”

“I’m sorry.” Lexie said sincerely, sitting on the end of her bed. Mel was on the defensive, legs drawn up and hugging her knees. “Don’t be mad at me. I just need to get out sometimes.”

“I’m not mad” Mel sighed. “Like I said I was worried.”

Lexie almost said she had nothing to worry about as Daryl was escorting her, but decided against it, aware that the entire thing would mean she not only had to admit to scaling the wall of a night, but also to the fact that her and Daryl seemed to like each other’s company so much, he had started turning up every time she went on a night time escape. To Mel, the whole thing would look far too suspicious for her to understand.

“How was your guard shift?” Lexie asked.

Mel instantly brightened, her white, well kept teeth flashing in the dull light of Lexie’s room.

“It was good. I didn’t want it to end. He’s talking to me more. I’m trying not to read into it, but I really want to.” Mel beamed, nibbling on her thumbnail.

“Mel” Lexie warned.

“I really like him, Lex.”

“Oh god.” Lexie huffed.

“I did listen to you! I’m not pushing this, I swear! I just…” She paused to take a deep breath “I think you’re right. He is different. It’s a good thing. It makes him even more attractive.”

She couldn’t put her finger on it. After searching the far corners of her mind, she couldn’t figure out why she felt angry at Mel’s failure to just drop this and leave Daryl alone. What worried her the most, was the thought of him actually giving in to her. A thought which filled her with a feeling she wasn’t familiar with, but hated all the same. Shoving her feeling’s aside, she gestured to her bed.

“I should get some rest if we’re having this damn party tomorrow.” She complained.

Mel shuffled off the bed and flung her arms around Lexie’s shoulders as she passed. She kissed her cheek and made her way to the door, stopping in the shadows of the hall.

“Thank you for agreeing to this. Please let me do your hair and put a little make up on you? I have the perfect dress for you too. Don’t worry, it’s black.” She pleaded.

Lexie hated having to dress up. Before the turn, her idea of dressing up was putting on a pair of jeans that weren’t ripped and applying a small amount of mascara. Contrary to Mel’s definition of the term.

“Fine, but no making me look like a drag queen.” She warned.

“You’re going to look pretty! Because you _are_ pretty!” Mel sang as she vanished from view.

 *****

During the day, Olivia had agreed to oversee everything at the armoury while Mel floated around the town inviting everyone to the party. She had been a massive ball of energy for the entire day and come the late afternoon, was showing no signs of calming down. When the sun finally dipped below the trees, Lexie and Aaron were in the kitchen, sorting out a box of food items from the pantry and cooking a huge pot of pasta. Eric had busied himself in the living room with Carol, who had demanded to help once she got wind of the news of a party and was now moving furniture around and arranging the drinks table and buffet.

Lexie stood next to Aaron at the stove, her legs feeling exposed and drafty in the short, black dress that Mel had insisted she wear. It was plain at the front with long sleeves and a slashed neckline but boasted a low triangular cut out at the back, revealing her spine. The fabric was thick enough for her not to feel completely naked but it was tight, or ‘figure hugging’ as Mel had called it. Her hair was down, washed, blow dried and her waves accentuated. Her make up was simple, but Mel had managed to pin her sister down long enough to draw on two perfect lines of winged eyeliner. When she had finally allowed Lexie to look in the mirror, she had blinked in disbelief at the result. She didn’t even look like herself. Or, what she usually recognised as herself.

She wiggled in the dress, tugging it down with one hand as she stirred the pot with the other. Aaron noticed her discomfort and shot her a smirk.

“Don’t” Lexie spat.

“I’m sorry“ he chuckled. “You just look so uncomfortable”

“I am” She growled. “Dressed up like this in a fucking apocalypse. Going to be useless if the gate gets bashed in by Walkers.” She bashed the wooden spoon on the side of the pot, discarding the excess pasta and switched the stove off.

“You could just flash them that amazing ass of yours and shock them into submission.” He suggested, craning his beck behind her to catch a glimpse of her curves.

“Thanks. I think. God, I’m glad you’re gay.” She laughed.

“Gay but able to appreciate.” He said, wagging a finger at her. “Seriously, you look hot. It’s hard to believe you’re the same girl I saw out in those woods all that time ago.”

She picked up a dish cloth and flicked it at his arm in a display of playful but awkward affection, the only way she really knew to show anyone else but Mel that she was fond of them. He tugged his arm away and grinned at her as he helped her lift the pot from the stove.

 

An hour later, Mel had walked down the stairs as if she were a queen addressing her people. Her over the top, blue, sequin adorned dress sparkling in the light of candles that lined the room, on shelves, in front of windows and in lanterns hanging from the walls. Lexie shook her head and smiled at her sister’s seemingly careless attitude towards the fact that they were a bunch of people behind some walls in a world where people died, got up again and ate other people.

Mel sent Lexie a dark, red lipped kiss across the room as she met the bottom of the stairs and headed to the front door to let in whoever had just rang the doorbell. People poured into the house and with every new face came another new wave of anxiety for Lexie. She had almost kissed Aaron when he’d taken her to one side in the kitchen and told her there was three bottles of their secret red wine hidden in the utility room. She had immediately grabbed a glass and stalked out of the kitchen.

Mel’s cheerful and excited demeanour had started to wane after around two hours. Daryl still hadn’t shown up and she was starting to believe he had decided not to bother. The rest of Rick’s group had arrived and Eugene had stood in one corner nursing the same drink as he watched Lexie’s every move. Abraham had tapped her on the shoulder and told her to ignore him and that he just didn’t have a clue what to do around other human beings, let alone women. Lexie had laughed it off and did her best not to make eye contact.

When Lexie started to feel like her final ounce of energy had been sapped, she filled her wine glass and decided to step outside onto the porch. The cold air hit her as her black heels clunked on the porch’s wooden floor and she clicked the door shut behind her. She took a big gulp of her wine, closed her eyes and released a slow breath as she tried to steady her nerves. Being around so many people and having to make so much small talk was exhausting to her, even without being dressed as someone she wasn’t.

Daryl was sat on a chair on the front porch of Lexie and Mel’s house, realising he needed a nicotine fix before heading into what was quite possibly the kind of situation that would leave him wanting to run for the hills. He lit his smoke and sat back in the dark shade, propping one foot up on the seat in front. He glanced to the side when the door clicked, seeing Lexie stood in front of it and necking a glass of wine. His eyes travelled down her body, over her tight, black dress, down her smooth and toned legs, to her killer heels and back up again. She turned slightly, revealing the cut-out part in her dress and her exposed back. He realised he was holding his breath and for a very good reason.

 _Damn._ He thought.

She flinched and whirled around when she heard him clear his throat.

“Daryl? How long have you been there?” She asked, picking up a candle from the floor and placing it on the table in front of him. She tugged her dress down before she sat down in front of him, flicking her fingers over his boot so he moved it from the seat.

“Five minutes or so.” He answered.

“I think Mel is convinced you weren’t going to show.” She told him, placing her hands on her lap and shivering slightly in the cold, night air.

“Yeah, about Mel…” he started, sitting up straight and exhaling grey smoke from his nose. “…I gotta find a way to tell her that it aint ever gonna happen. Any idea how I can do that?”

Lexie hoped that he couldn’t tell in any way that her heart had jumped in her chest. She tried to figure out what it was that she felt, reluctant to admit that it was, in fact, relief. But why? Was it for Mel’s sake? Or her own?

“Um, I think you should just be straight up with her. There’s no nice way of saying ‘I don’t wanna screw you’, right?” She shrugged, holding her hand out and wiggling her fingers in front of the cigarette that was balanced between his lips. He offered it to her and watched her take a drag and pass it back, slightly stunned by her straightforward answer.

“If you’re not interested, you’re not interested. Right?” She affirmed.

“Uh, yeah.” He agreed.

She sighed, a long exasperated sigh and her hair flapped at the side in the gust of her breath.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, concerned that she was actually angry at him and was hiding it.

“She’s always trying to get me to be something I’m not. The dress, the heels. I feel like a fucking clown. But I only did this for her. I do everything for her. Maybe it’s time to go, do something for me.”

Before he could say anything, the door flung open and Mel swanned out onto the porch clutching a wine glass. Her eyes fell on Lexie, then Daryl, who at that moment realised that they were sat closer together than he would have usually been comfortable with. Lexie gestured to Daryl with one hand.

“Look who I found” she announced.

“Hey. Didn’t think you were going to make it.” Mel directed at Daryl, who was now anxiously tapping his leg.

“Carol said there was beer.” He shrugged.

“Sure is” She chirped “c’mon in, I’ll get you one.”

His eyes briefly lowered to Lexie, seeing her peering down at her hands in her lap. Her hair had fallen either side of her face and for the first time he saw in her a vulnerability that he could not only relate to but was quite surprised by.

“See ya in there” He mumbled down at her as he got to his feet. When he looked round at Mel, he noticed a flicker of jealously pass across her features and felt himself prickle with irritation. Choosing not to react, he followed her inside, allowing himself one last glimpse of Lexie before he stepped inside. He raised her head and smiled at him. He really didn’t want her to leave Alexandria.

 

Aaron stood in the corner of the living room next to Eric, who was munching his way through a bowl of potato chips that no one else seemed to like. Catching sight of Lexie in the kitchen with Carol, he smiled at her deliberate effort to mingle and chat to people. His vision moved to the other side of the room and he took a gulp of his drink, eventually spotting Daryl who was leaning against the wall with a beer bottle in his hand and a scowl on his face. On one side of him stood Glenn and on the other, Mel who was chattering aimlessly at both of them. Aaron noticed Daryl’s attention wasn’t on the conversation in front of him and he followed his line of vision, coming to a stop at Lexie. She was on the other side of the house but Aaron could clearly see Daryl watching her through the crowd of people that filled the space between. Every so often, he would nod or offer a short reply to something Glenn or Mel said, but his focus always returned to the quiet girl in the short, black dress.

“Eric” Aaron whispered, leaning slightly closer to him. “Look at Daryl. What do you see?”

Eric squinted as he studied the room, funding Daryl and looping a hand around Aaron’s forearm. He was still chewing a mouthful of chips. Aaron waited until finally, he felt Eric grip his arm tighter and look over at Lexie.

“Oh god.” Eric said quietly “is he…?”

“Watching Lex? I think so.” Aaron admitted. “Maybe it’s just a one off”

The two of them remained in their spot for around twenty minutes until there was no doubt that Daryl couldn’t seem to refrain from seeking Lexie out with his eyes at every opportunity that presented it’s self.

“What do we do with this Information?” Eric whispered eventually.

“I’ll go talk to Lexie, you keep Mel away” Aaron instructed as he began to weave in and out of the people in the middle of the house.

 

 

Lexie was now nursing her fourth glass of wine and was beginning to feel less inhibited thanks to the alcohol. She had been chatting on and off to Carol for around ten minutes in the kitchen while she filled bowls and plates with more snacks.

“Thanks for the cookies the other day.” Lexie said as she leaned back on the countertop, her finger tracing around the top of her wine glass.

“Oh, you’re welcome.” Carol dismissed, waving a hand at her

“I ate them all. In one sitting. On my own.” Lexie disclosed proudly, hearing Carol laugh to her self and reach up to the cupboard for a glass. She poured herself a drink and settled next to her against the counter.

“Daryl said I should speak to you about learning some close combat skills. Says you’re good with a knife.” Lexie commented.

Carol looked round at her with a confused expression.

“Daryl is much better than me with knives. He taught me what I know. But I can show you, by all means.”

Like Carol, Lexie wondered why Daryl hadn’t offered to teach her himself, they spent enough time together outside the walls. She guessed he just was just apprehensive about teaching something to someone he hardly knew that well. She had to admit, in his situation, she would have done the same.

“Thanks. I’ll stop by your place at some point.” Lexie told her.

“Of course, whenever.” She grinned.

Aaron appeared in front of them and swapped pleasantries with Carol. He got himself another drink and hovered around at the side of Lexie, trying to get her attention. He cleared his throat loudly and she shot him a wary look.

“I need to talk to you.” He uttered “in private.”

“Great. More talking” Lexie huffed, nudging her head in the direction of the stairs. She made tracks towards them, excusing herself from her conversation with Carol. Aaron followed after making an excuse about having to go and find more glasses which only served to puzzle Carol more as she looked over her shoulder to see the cupboard still full of them.

Stopping in her bedroom, Lexie spun around and raised her eyebrows at Aaron.

“OK, um… don’t freak out.” He started

“Well, that’s not a good start, now I’m freaking out.” She complained.

“Don’t. It’s OK. Nobody else knows about this except me and Eric.” He informed her.

“Knows about what, Aaron? What are you talking about?” She pushed, placing her hands on her hips.

“Daryl. He’s been watching you, non-stop since he got here. I don’t think anyone else has noticed because he’s not exactly obvious about it, but Eric and I, we agree.”

Nerves began to rise in her chest.

“Um…OK, that’s probably because I’m the only person the entire room that understands him” She replied, unsure of how to proceed.

“You don’t get it, do you?” He questioned “I spy something beginning with L and T”

Lexie picked up a towel from the bed and flicked it at him, growling with annoyance at his mind games. “Just spit it out!” She demanded.

“Love Triangle.” He announced triumphantly. “He’s not into Mel, Lex. He’s into you.”

Lexie began to nibble on her bottom lip and pace around the room, hovering around the front window before moving back to Aaron. This couldn’t be right, he had to be imagining it. She had to admit, she didn’t want him to be right anymore than she wanted Daryl to end up with Mel but had little idea as to why she felt like that. He had given her no indication that he was interested in anything past sitting with her in the abandoned store and listening to her waffle on about books and how much she hated Alexandria.

“No. He’s not. We get along, we have stuff in common. That’s all it is.”

Aaron scoffed loudly and took hold of her wrist.

“It’s subtle, Lex. But he’s not looking at you because of your mutual love of hunting. He’s looking at you because he likes you.”

Lexie tugged her wrist out of his grasp. “So, what if he is? It doesn’t have to mean anything more than that.”

“Of course, it doesn’t. I’m just telling you because it could make things awkward with Mel.” He assured her. “I won’t say anything else, I promise.” He held his hands up in front of him, his palms facing her.

“You’re wrong.” Lexie spat. “He’s not into me like that. He’s not into anyone.” She pushed past him and left the room, just in time to see Mel charging to the stairs towards her, tears escaping from her eyes.

 *****

Daryl had slipped outside for a smoke in the hope of getting a minute’s peace. He had told himself he would have one more drink before leaving altogether, that was unless Lexie reappeared and he got the opportunity to spend more time with her, which he found himself wanting to do more and more since their run and time spent in the abandoned store.  Abraham had slyly placed a glass of bourbon in his hand as he headed for the door and he had nodded to the large, ginger man in thanks. He settled back down into the chair he sat in when he arrived and enjoyed the relief the nicotine provided him with.

Mel had flitted back and forth between him and various other people and he could tell she was trying not to be so overbearing, but didn’t want to just leave him to his own devices altogether. The others from his group had teased him mercilessly about his admirer and he’d sworn at one or two of them in response, tolerating their jibes and getting nothing but laughs in return.

He had expected Mel to follow him outside at some point and when she did appear, he asked her to sit down, telling her he had to talk to her. Her face had lit up and he felt a slither of guilt for what he was about to do to her.

“Alright. I know ya got this…this thing for me, but I really aint after that kind of thing. I needed to tell ya that it just aint gonna happen, Mel. I don't want ya wastin' ya time on me”

Her face dropped and her lips parted, the shiny gloss on her lips glistening in the candlelight of the porch. The air left her lungs and Daryl took a long drag on his cigarette before downing the entire glass of bourbon in front of him. He made a mental note to thank Abraham properly later on, and ask him where he got it.

“I-I understand.” Mel stammered.

“M’sorry.” He added.

“No, It’s fine. I appreciate your honesty.”

He nodded slowly, sucking his bottom lip into his mouth and nibbling on it.

“I have to ask” She croaked. “Is this because I’m ugly to your, or something?”

Daryl immediately gave her a look that was a combination of shock and mild sympathy. She dipped her head, looking at the decking at her feet and trying to process the fact that she was being rejected.

“Hey. Mel? Look at me” He said firmly, she raised her gaze to him reluctantly and trying to hold back tears. “No. That’s not it. OK? Look, I’m flattered, you’re a good lookin’ girl. This just, it aint for me.”

She began nodding frantically and getting up from her seat. Before he knew it, she’d rushed inside, leaving him alone on the porch.

 *****

“Mel, are you OK? What’s wrong?” Lexie asked, worriedly holding a hand out to place it on her sisters’ shoulder as she attempted to rush past her on the stairs.

“Leave me alone. Please.” Mel sniffed.

“Mel-“

“-I said leave me alone!” She snapped, throwing Lexie’s hand away and shoving past both her and Aaron. She ran up the last few steps and disappeared into her room, slamming the door behind her.

Lexie looked over her shoulder at Aaron who was stood a couple of steps behind her.

“I guess he told her.” He mused.

“Yeah.” She sighed, carrying on down the stairs and back to the party below.

 *****

On the front porch, Daryl finished his smoke and decided to head back next door. He’d done enough socialising that night to last him a lifetime and now he just wanted to be alone. More specifically, he wanted to climb the wall and go and sit in Lexie’s night time sketching spot. Instead, he headed into the house and flopped down on the couch, laying his head back on the pillow and enjoying the empty house for once. When he heard a knock at the door, everything in him told him to ignore it, pretend he wasn’t in. But he got up and clicked open the door.

Lexie stood on the other side, her arms wrapped around her body and rubbing up and down her arms. She was standing with her left side facing him, peering back at her own house for a moment. His eyes lowered slightly to the now visible part of her bare back, then to her legs, below her dress which stopped just below her thighs. Scolding himself for allowing his eyes and mind to wander, he opened the door further and stepped back.

“Hey. Come in. It’s freezin’ out there.”

Lexie stepped in from the night air and offered him a half smile. Daryl turned and stepped into the living room, taking a blanket from the back of the couch and opening it up. He moved closer to her and she peered up at him as he draped it over her shoulders. She grasped it at the front in her fist and struggled to believe how much of a gentleman he could be.

“You made my sister cry.” She said directly.

He stepped back and dropped his head, his hair falling in front of his face.

“Lex-“

“Relax, she needs this.” She dismissed, much to his surprise. She set off on a slow stroll around the dark hallway and living room, taking in the few personal possessions and the artwork on the walls. She knew Daryl didn’t live alone. In fact, he lived with four other people but the place was spotless and tidier than her own house. She assumed Carol did most of the housekeeping and that Daryl had very little to do with it.

“She…what?” He asked

She stopped by the window, adjusting the drape slightly to enable her to see the road.

“She’s never been told no from a guy twice before. She’s used to getting what she wants. She needs this. It’ll show her that she can’t always have things her own way.” She explained.

“Make her sound like a kid.” Daryl pointed out.

“You’d be surprised.” She smiled. “Honestly, you did the right thing.”

He perched on the arm of the couch and ran a hand over his face.

“Feel like an asshole.” He grumbled.

She quirked one side of her mouth up in a sympathetic gesture and moved off from the window, adjusting the blanket around her shoulders and sitting on the other end of the couch. She was starkly aware of her heels and the way she was forced to sit so as not to expose anything under her short dress. She wasn’t used to having to think about such things and the sight of her bare legs, drawn to the side like some kind of princess was completely alien to her.

“If you’d gone along with it, slept with her and then threw her away like last nights leftovers, that would have made you an asshole. You were straight with her, can’t ask for much more than that.” She told him.

“Wouldn’t have done that.” He said.

“I know.” She affirmed. “Although, she deserves some payback from making me wear this getup”

She laughed slightly and Daryl lifted a hand to nibble on his thumb.

“Ya don’t look like no clown.” He said.

Lexie huffed and shook her head.

“Ya look good.” He muttered form behind his hand.

“You think?” She pressed.

“Yeah, I do” He nodded.

Lexie wasn’t good with compliments. She would rather never hear them than have to face the skin crawling nervousness that ensued when someone threw her a nice comment. But there and then, sat on the other end of the couch to Daryl, she attempted to be graceful.

“Um, Thank you. I should go. I only wanted to tell you not to worry about Mel.” She went to stand up, bracing herself with one hand on the arm of the couch.

“Wait” Daryl ordered, a little louder than he had imagined it. “Don’t leave Alexandria.”

Lexie looked up at him, her eyes somehow bright in the darkness of the room. He searched his mind for the right words to say for fear of coming across as if he were begging or as if he had some kind of personal reason for her to stay.

“If ya wanna learn to fight with knives. I can teach ya. If ya wanna get outside the walls more often, you can come on more runs with me, we’ll take the bike. Leavin’ altogether, it aint the right way.” He expressed, satisfied with his reasoning.

She was quiet for a few moments as she picked at her nails in her lap. She hadn’t expected him to try and talk her out of it, believing that he was more likely to leave her to her own devices and not get involved. She was suffocating behind the walls and his proposition was tempting but she couldn’t understand why he had bothered.

“Why are you trying to stop me?” She questioned.

He shifted and decided he needed to get up, needed to pace and try and generate some kind of thought process from here. He hadn’t thought this far ahead. He had planned to tell her that he thought her idea was a terrible one and that there were so many other aspects that she needed to consider. Aside from Mel and her friends, there was Deanna, who had taken her in and trusted her and relied upon her for so much. Then, there was the constant threat outside the walls that did nothing but wear people down and turn them into monsters themselves. Daryl had seen it first hand and while he knew why she needed to get out every now and then, living on the outside 24/7 was not good for anyone.

“Don’t want you to leave.” He confessed. “There aint many folks I got time for.”

When he didn’t say anything else, Lexie figured she knew what the missing part to his sentence was. _But I have time for you._ For a split second, she thought that maybe Aaron was right, before she stuffed the idea to the back of her mind. She followed Daryl with her eyes as she ambled past her, across the front windows and back again.

“I spend 90% of my time alone.” She started “It’s a choice. But then you arrived and every time I’ve tried to be alone, you’ve turned up out of nowhere.”

“Sorry” He quickly said.

“Don’t.” She shot back. “I didn’t say it was a bad thing. We both understand that there isn’t this voracious need to fill the gaps in conversation. We can sit in each other’s company and enjoy the quiet. I think that’s because we understand each other. I trusted you with this secret. Turns out I was right to. But I am suffocating here, Daryl. I have to do something to make it stop.”

“Then let me teach ya how to fight. Let me take ya out on runs.-”

“-Daryl-”

“Naw, I aint finished.” He snapped. She closed her mouth and swallowed hard. His frame was silhouetted against the backdrop of the window which was dimly lit from outside, a lantern on the front porch sending a few beams of light into the room.

“You told me, ya said you didn’t think that anyone would miss ya…” He reminded her. He turned his back, his head low. She saw his shoulders heave slowly as if he were dragging in a long breath.

“I think I would” He concluded.

Dumbfounded, Lexie sat completely still and closed her eyes. _Please don’t let Aaron be right._ When she opened them again, she found herself standing up, taking off the blanket and heading for the door. Almost on autopilot, she didn’t know how she’d managed to come to the decision that she needed to leave, but her legs were taking her there anyway. Daryl darted over to the front door and held it shut with his arm. Lexie stood right in front of him, her back to him, mere inches separating them.

“Just think about it.” He uttered.

“I have to go. Goodnight, Daryl.” She responded.


	6. Chapter 6

 

Lexie had cleared up the entire house with Eric, Aaron and Carol who had offered to say and help. Failing to hide her irritation, she stormed around the house, slamming items into a trash bag noisily and muttering to herself. She didn’t even want the party, Mel did, then she did nothing to help with he mess afterwards. Nevertheless, Mel was her sister and so after taking time to simmer down, she made her a herbal tea and climbed the stairs to Mel’s room.

“Am I allowed in?” She asked as she leaned against the door frame.

Mel, who was sat on her bed with her bedsheets drawn up over her legs and still wearing her dress, pat the bed next to her. Her room was decorated with a myriad of colourful fabrics, pictures of Mel with groups of her friends that she had manage to salvage after the turn and piles of magazines. Lexie moved inside and handed her the mug of hot liquid which she gratefully received.

“What happened?” She cooed, settling on the bed next to her sister and slipping her legs under the covers.

“I’m not going to win this one.” She sniffed.

“Daryl? No, I don’t think you are either.” She agreed.

“I feel like a fool.” Mel confessed before slurping loudly on her drink.

“You’ve never been turned down like this before. It’s going to feel shitty. But you don’t even know him all that well, you don’t know if you really liked him as much as you think you do.” Lexie reasoned.

“Oh I do know” Mel corrected “I really liked him. Like… really liked him.”

Lexie let her head tilt to the side and rested it on Mel’s shoulder. Neither of them spoke for a while and Lexie just lay there and listened to the noisy sounds of her sister drinking herbal tea and repeatedly blowing into the mug to cool it down.

“Mel” Lexie said, sitting back up. “I have to tell you something.”

“That doesn’t sound good. What a night this has turned out to be” Mel huffed.

“It’s not that bad” Lexie chuckled “it’s just that Daryl has offered to teach me some close combat skills and we are both hunters so it’s only a matter of time before Deanna sends us out on runs together. I didn’t want you to feel bad because of the amount of time I’m going to be spending with him.” She explained.

Her heart began to hammer at the realisation of what had just emerged from her mouth. She had twisted the truth slightly and was reluctant to ask herself why. What was she afraid of? Why didn’t she just tell Mel that Daryl had offered to take her on some runs with him so she could get out more often? Lexie never lied, never seriously anyway. The odd white lie to protect someone’s feelings was OK, she reasoned. Provided it didn’t escalate. If she had told Mel the truth, no matter how platonic it is, it just would have made her feel worse and that was the last thing she wanted for her.

“OK. Thank you for telling me.” Mel replied as Lexie’s heart almost snapped into two pieces.

“Sure” She whispered, scooting down in the bed and laying her head on the pillow.

“Whole damn town knows. They all know I have a crush on him. I was going around telling them all my plan. Now, I just look like a psycho. Why have I done this to myself?!” Mel whined.

“Because you didn’t know any better” Lexie sighed, wishing she could just try and get some sleep after the evenings events.

Mel finally thumped her mug on the night stand and shuffled down next to her sister, closing her eyes and trying not to think of the embarrassment she would have to endure in the coming days.

 *****

Daryl checked over his bike at the gate, examining the wheels, oil level and break pads. Everything seemed fine and he lit a smoke while he stood back and looked up at the sky. The yellowish hues streaked across the early morning horizon and all that surrounded him was peace. Complete quiet that he wished would last all day. Even the gate guard was falling asleep while leaned against a post. He had attached his crossbow to the vehicle and glanced over at Lexie and Mel’s place. Mel was sat on their porch, rocking back and forth on a swing chair in a tiny pair of white shorts and a college T-shirt. He started towards the house, finishing his smoke as he reached their front lawn.

Mel was thumbing through a fashion magazine she had read a thousand times before. The collections featured were years old but she sometimes preferred to reminisce and imagine things were back to the way they were before. Her blonde hair hung around her shoulders in loose curls from the night before and her face was bare, any traces of her party make-up now gone. Her eyes were still bright despite her low mood and she smiled politely at him when she saw him nearing the steps.

“Hi” She said.

“Mornin’.” He rasped. “How ya doin?”

“Oh, you know… Alright. Considering” She prodded, easing off the spite with a small laugh.

A bashful smile ghosted his lips and he briefly hung his head before looking back up at her.

“Apparently it was a good party. Eugene forgot where he lived, turned up at our house drunker than a skunk and tried to pee in Rick’s closet.”

Mel erupted with laughter. A laugher that she needed and she leaned forwards in her seat and gently slapped her leg.

“No way! That is hilarious and gross at the same time.” She giggled.

“Everybody was up, squinting and hollerin’ in the dark. Couldn’t see straight I was laughin’ so hard’.” he confessed. “Anyways, Lexie home?”

Mel slumped back in her chair and flung her legs up on the arm of the seat opposite.

“Lex?! Are you home?!” She yelled. Daryl smarted at the unexpected volume of her voice. He narrowed his eyes and peered through the window of the front door, hearing Mel clear her throat. When he looked back at her, she had an index finger raised and pointing to the roof, her face amused and mischievous.

Out of nowhere, Lexie’s head appeared to the side of Daryl as she peered, upside down over the edge of the porch roof she was sitting on.

“What the hell?!” Daryl exclaimed, jumping backwards  “what are ya doin up there?!”

Mel started to laugh from her spot at the table again, trying to stifle her giggles with a hand in front of her face.

“Watching the sun rise.” Lexie commented casually, her cheeks turning red the longer she hung upside down. “What's up?”

“Uh…Think you could come down here first? This is damn weird.” He protested.

“I’ll be right down” she laughed before disappearing from view.

Daryl glanced back at Mel who now had one leg drawn up and was biting down on the top of her finger, she was grinning at him.

“She do that a lot?” He questioned. She nodded.

“Uh Huh.” She reached out and grabbed the door handle, pushing it open. “Go on inside. She won’t be long.”

 Daryl stepped inside the shockingly tidy and clean house when he considered that they’d had a party for the whole town the night before. He quietly headed through the hall and slowly padded around the living room, surveying all the personal belongings arranged on the coffee table. Nail polishes, books, pencils, knives. After a couple of minutes Lexie appeared wearing her usual, practical, military inspired outfit with her knife holster attached to her leg. She also wore a black tank top that was tight and Daryl pushed a flashback away from the night before, when she had stunned him with her surprisingly attractive figure.

“Hey” she greeted as she got to the bottom step. She stopped there, holding onto the end of the banister.

“Hey. I’m goin’ out on the bike. Ya wanna come?” He said, straight to the point.

“I don’t know, I’m not in the best of moods and I have to be in the armoury in a half hour anyway.” She shrugged

“Get Mel to cover for ya.” He immediately suggested.

“Uh… I’m not sure if she-“

“Ya wanna learn stuff or not, girl?” He shot at her.

Lexie’s mouth opened slightly at his direct approach to this. She was taken aback by how determined he seemed to be to get her to go with him.

“Um, alright. Fine. Mr. Pushy.” She jested, her mouth curling into a smile which was returned instantly. “Let me go and ask Mel and collect some stuff. Take a seat.”

“Alright. Ya got a light-coloured shirt?” He questioned

Lexie looked at him in puzzlement

“Probably not. Why?” She answered.

“Find one. One that ya don’t mind gettin’ ruined. Ya gonna need it.” He told her before turning and wandering to the couch where he plonked down and picked up one of Lexie’s books from the table, ignoring her perturbed look.

 

Mel had exhaled loudly and tightened her jaw when Lexie asked her to cover her armory shift so she could go out with Daryl. Jealousy and anger written all over her face. Lexie tried not to take it personally, it wasn’t as if they’d planned it, but she still felt terribly guilty for being part of the reason her sister was unhappy. Mel would have done almost anything to ensure Daryl was taking her outside the walls today, had he not shot her down. Instead, he was taking Lexie which didn’t quite sit well with her. Stopping short of saying anything she could regret, Mel shrugged a shoulder and waved Lexie off.

“I’ll do it. I suppose I owe you for the party anyway. Go on. Have a good day. Be safe.” She said.

Lexie had decided against trying to talk to her anymore, accepting that she needed time to lick her wounds. She headed inside and up to her room, passing Daryl in the living room who was still looking over her paperback book in his hand. He was staring down at the pages with his eyebrows pinched together and his top lip almost curled up in an expression of pure bafflement. Lexie smiled and continued up the stairs.

In her room, she dragged all her T-shirts out of her closet in a determined effort to locate the one, single item of clothing she had that was as close to white as she was going to get. It was a tan coloured, plain top that she had picked up at the beginning of the turn in a frantic effort to gather supplies and clothing for what at the time, seemed like a life on the road. Finally finding it under a pile of boxes, she snatched it from the floor and stuffed it into her backpack before thumping out of the room and back down to a waiting Daryl.

 

Daryl had explained that he wanted to check out a camp in the woods that he had noticed when he and the group were making their way to Alexandria. He wanted to check it to see if it was being used and by who, aiming to determine weather they were decent enough to bring back and add to the community. On the way, he had stopped the bike and wheeled it into the woods where Lexie helped him cover it with branches and leaves. He felt like he never really had to give her many instructions, she was vigilant and observant enough to know what was going on without him needing to say anything. It was for this reason that he realised after around two and a half hours had passed that they hadn’t actually uttered a word to one another since they’d left the gate at Alexandria. She seemed content enough to wander along at his side, but he knew she was side eyeing him suspiciously, assuming she knew what he was doing. He was trying to convince her to stay.

Daryl stopped suddenly and scanned the area around them, it was completely still and clear of any threats, with a decent amount of sunlight beaming through the trees. He dropped his crossbow and Lexie raised her eyebrows.

“Ya pick up a shirt?” He questioned.

“Yes.” She answered.

“Good. Put it on.” He told her.

She pushed the strap of her backpack further up on her shoulder and swallowed hard. The prospect of having to change in the middle of the woods and in front of Daryl not a being a pleasant one.

“Uh…You mean-”

“-Over the one you’re wearin’.” He confirmed with a flicker of a smile.,

“Oh, right. Yeah.” She mumbled, giving the floor an awkward glare as she dropped her backpack and pulled out the shirt. Daryl reached into his pocket as Lexie wrestled with the garment, tugging it down over her clothes and looking down, unimpressed at how tight it appeared. She brushed the loose strands of her hair that had fallen from her ponytail away from her face and looked up at Daryl, raising her arms either side of her.

“Well” She sighed. “I look like a fool. What’s this about?”

Daryl stepped closer to her and removed the lid from a black marker pen. He held it up over his shoulder as if he were holding a knife, clenched in his fist. Shifting and placing one foot forward in a defensive and stable stance, he levelled his eyes at her before lunging at her and attacking her with the pen.

She gasped and stepped back, the marker catching her shoulder. She brought a hand up to try and push him away but was too slow as he went for her stomach, managing to slash a thin black line across her abdomen. She grabbed for his arms, missing every time and it felt like every part of her torso was being jabbed by the pointed end of the pen. She squealed and tried to jump back further only for Daryl to seize her wrist in a tight grasp and pulled her closer to him. She felt the pen hit into her back over and over as she tried and failed to rip her arm away from him. Eventually, after what felt like the longest few minutes of her life, Daryl stopped marking her with the pen and stilled. She gradually raised her vision to his face as he held her arm up above her, his body was so close to her, she could feel his breath on her face and see the bright blue hue of his eyes behind his hair. She breathed out a jagged breath as he finally let go of her. She quickly moved back, clearing her throat and blinking in disbelief.

“What the hell was that?” She gasped as she tried to catch her breath.

“Right here.” Daryl said, pointing to a big black dot over her sternum. “If the pen were a knife, I’d have probably killed ya. Then there’s this….” He moved his hand down, his index finger hovering over the long line across her abdomen from one side to the other. “…Would have opened ya guts up too.”

“I-Uh” She stammered as she looked down at her shirt. She looped her fingertips into the hem and prized it from her body, seeing the long, black line among numerous dashes and dots in other places.

“Wanted to learn how to use a knife properly, right? Gotta know how to defend yourself too.” He informed her, slipping the pen back into his pocket.

“Is this a ploy to get me to stay?” She asked, raising an eyebrow.

“No.” He denied “Said ya wanted to learn so you could leave. But I think ya need to learn anyway.”

She dropped her eyes to the floor, kicking around some twigs with her boot. She didn’t know if she believed that Daryl wasn’t trying to get her to stay at Alexandria and stood there in front of him, her shirt covered in pen marks, she didn’t really care. What did have her attention was the fact that he was even bothering to try and teach her without any kind of reward for himself.

“Ya aint gotta.” He offered quietly. “Just forget it.”

“No.” She replied, her head snapping up. “I want to learn.”

He glanced from her face to the floor a few times, trying to read her sincerity. Determining it was genuine, he tilted his head back slightly and gave her a slight nod.

“Alright.” He agreed.

Over the next hour, Daryl explained that the reason he’d marked her with the pen was to give her a basic understanding of how she could get wounded in a knife attack from a live human. He showed her that the dots on her shirt represented stab wounds that could potentially lead to internal bleeding, the lines and other markings were slash wounds. He also warned her that she would need to know knife defence before she could learn knife training and that one lesson wasn’t going to be enough. After showing her how to create distance and guessing the attacker’s intent, they both sat down against a log and Daryl lit a cigarette. Lexie still wore her ruined shirt and poked and prodded at the black marks on it as Daryl smoked.

“Thank you.” She uttered.

“Aint done nothin’.” He commented.

She swallowed hard, wanting to explain to him how grateful she was and hoping that it wouldn't come out too dramatic. As a person that wasn't used to caring what other people thought, she seemed to constantly concerned about it at that moment. 

“I know you’re out here to check out that camp. But you came to get me from my house, took me out on your bike knowing I like Motorcycles and being outside the walls. Then, you agreed to teach me how to protect myself and that’s likely to take a few lessons.” She detailed.

He side glanced at her before taking a long drag on his cigarette. Smoke exited his lungs in a large cloud in front of them.

“S’ok” He grumbled.

“You should let me return the favour somehow.” She suggested.

“Stop it.” He scoffed. “I don’t want nothin’ from you.”

“I’m serious, there must be something I can do in return.” She continued, realising how potentially flirtatious she sounded and wondering for a moment weather she should warn him about keeping it clean. After a couple of seconds of deliberation, she concluded that he was highly unlikely to answer with anything of the sort anyway. He finished his smoke and stubbed it into the ground between them.

“Is one thing” He said quietly.

“Name it.” She urged.

When he didn’t respond straight away, something in Lexie began to prickle, she began to fret about what he was working up to saying and hoping it wasn’t going to be something that was going to make everything incredibly uncomfortable. _Why did you have to tell me, Aaron?_  She thought

“Let me see that sketch book of yours” He finally answered.

She dipped her head slightly, trying to catch his eye. When he met her gaze, she shook her head.

“I’m sorry, I can’t do that.” She told him. “Even Mel hasn’t seen my drawings.”

“Why?” He queried.

“Because people can be judgy assholes.” She expressed.

Daryl studied her face as she turned her head back to survey the trees in front of them. The sun was still shining through the canopy of leaves in thin, slithers of warmth and the area around them remained completely silent

“Ya think I’m a judgy asshole?” He asked.

She smiled at him, a smile that shot from his eyes through his mind and stirred his memories. He stared at her, wanting to tell her how familiar she was, how he remembered her. But decided not to bring it up.

“No. I don’t.” She confirmed. “I just don’t like to give people the opportunity to prove me wrong. So, you’ll have to think of something else.” She got to her feet and dusted off her pants, leaves and dry mud falling to the floor. Daryl followed suit and collected his crossbow, accepting that he was not likely to ever lay eyes on any of her creations. Lexie crossed her arms in front of her, taking hold of the hem of the pen covered shirt and lifted it over her head. Daryl caught a brief, split-second glimpse of the curve of her waist and her toned stomach as she raised her arms and admitted to himself that regardless of who she reminded him of, she was an attractive woman. He turned away, internally scolding himself for getting distracted.

“C’mon, camps this way.” He grumbled over his shoulder at her.

 *****

When they found the seemingly abandoned camp, Lexie stayed out of the way and managed to successfully eliminate two Walkers while Daryl stalked back and forth, checking over and over for any recent footprints, broken branches and patches of earth that may suggest people had recently been there. But the fire in the middle was cold and there were no tracks that he could see. Lexie wandered through the trees for a while, her Pistol drawn just in case. When he cad called her over, she brought back with her a quail that she’d shot and killed.

“I got us lunch” She chirped as she sat down on a discarded box.

Daryl looked at the bird that she had dumped on her lap and then evaluated the burned out fire. 

“Should be able to get another fire started in there.” He mused.

“I’ll do it.” She offered.

When he disappeared for a while, she assumed he was checking the radius from the camp for any signs of life and set to work building the fire up and plucking the bird she’d shot. She could get used to this. Wandering the woods with someone who wasn’t as demanding as Mel, didn’t need to be watched over and didn’t pressure her for conversation. In fact, she was sure she’d not had such an enjoyable day in a very long time.

When he returned, he was carrying a squirrel by its tail and Lexie was sat cross legged in front of the fire, doodling in her sketchpad. Daryl smirked at her and shook his head when he saw her look up and quickly close the pad, flipping the front cover over so he couldn’t see anything.

“Stop laughing at me.” She complained, picking up a pebble from the ground and throwing it at him. It bounced from his boot onto the floor and he raised an eyebrow at her, struggling not to burst out laughing at her feeble display.

“I wasn’t laughin’ at ya. Am now though” He smiled, sitting down opposite her and across the fire. He began to skin the squirrel, throwing the skin and fur into the woods behind him.

“Had a good day.” Lexie expressed

“Yeah?” Daryl questioned.

“Mmhmm. So strange that I feel more comfortable out here.” She said to herself.

Once the squirrel was fully skinned, Daryl mounted it to a makeshift skewer and began to cook it. Both he and Lexie sat quietly, she sketched and he flipped his lighter open and shut and checked over his crossbow and each bolt carefully.

“I get it” he said out of nowhere. The fire crackled between them, the smell of the cooking meat causing Lexie’s stomach to growl. “Why ya wanna leave. Feel all boxed in in Alexandria” Lexie stopped pulling at the feathers on the bird and looked up at him. “Out here, I’m more like myself. I guess that’s kinda fucked up.” He concluded.

She regarded him with surprise at first, then a certain sadness before continuing her work on the feathers. When the bird was completely bald, she handed it to him and he quickly took it, checking it over and moving from his kneeling position to sitting back against a log, placing the bird on the wood next to him, ready to be cooked next. Lexie found herself a small twig on the ground and began pressing it into the hardened mud in front of her. Over and over again while she thought about what Daryl had said. Eventually, she lifted her eyes to him, he was gazing off into the peaceful woods, not really looking at anything in particular and appearing thoughtful in his expression. At least twenty minutes had passed since Daryl’s admission and Lexie wondered if it was actually too late to bring it up. 

“It’s not.” She said. His eyes flicked over to her but he remained perfectly still.

“What?” He answered, confused at her vague and sudden comment.

“It’s not fucked up.” She told him. “All those people in that community, they don’t know what’s outside those walls. They’ve never seen it. They bake their cookies and trim their lawns like there aren’t people out here… eating one another. Dead or alive. They don’t see what’s out here because they simply don’t want to. But one day- one day it’ll knock on the gate or it’ll break the walls down and they’re all going to die. That is what’s fucked up. Not you.”

Daryl had viewed her explanation from across the fire, the soft orange glow on her delicate features and her shy demeanour as she expressed her opinion. When she had stopped speaking, she looked up at him in time to see him divert his vision from her, almost bashfully and begin removing the animal from the skewer. He replaced it with the bird and sat back, loosely hugging his knees. She could see him chewing on his bottom lip.

“It’s rotten out here. Dangerous. Ain’t no place for nobody. Could never figure out why I just felt like it was normal somehow.” He mused.

“You want to know what I think?” She asked. Daryl nodded subtly at her. While he rarely cared about the opinions of others, Lexie’s opinion was different.

“I don’t think you adapted to the apocalypse. I think the apocalypse adapted to you.” She confirmed. “You can handle yourself out here like it’s second nature. This world underestimates you, Daryl.”

She offered him a brief smile before resuming her ritualistic stabbing of the earth with her twig. Daryl knew it was a huge compliment but was somehow unsure of what to say or do. He thought of thanking her, but decided against it, figuring that she never said it to receive a thanks in the first place. He was taken aback by her hopeful and confident view of him and as hard to believe as her words were, he was flattered.

“You should have the squirrel” She said. “I don’t like them much, I’ll stick to my quail. Was lucky I even spotted it.”

He grunted in acknowledgement and she waited patiently until the bird was cooked and ready to eat. When he passed it to her, she wasted no time in devouring the animal as if she hadn’t eaten in days, picking at it with her fingers before shoving chunks of meat into her mouth. Not caring one ounce for dinner etiquette, she was more interested in enjoying her lunch. When she’d claimed half of it she passed the rest to Daryl, a unsaid agreement that the bird was slightly bigger than the squirrel so it was only fair that she shared.

“Ever had a white trash brunch?” Daryl asked casually.

Lexie laughed slightly, her mouth still full. She chewed quickly, wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and grinned to herself.

“Do I even want to know what that is?” She giggled.

“Peanut butter and jelly, diet soda and pig’s feet. White trash brunch.” He explained, his eyes trained on her as he picked the bones of the bird clean. She started to laugh and shake her head at him.

“That sounds…classy” She responded.

“Wasn’t winnin’ no awards but it was some good shit.” He remembered.

She tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and rubbed her hands together slowly.

“I used to go to this Diner with my Uncle. The Delmont. It had these red and white 50’s inspired booths and this awesome old jukebox. I used to get a huge milkshake, the kind that was so full of sugar it’d keep you awake for hours. They also served the best White Trash Hash there.” She grinned.

Daryl knew the Delmont, he knew the white trash hash, he knew the 50’s inspired seats and the old jukebox, he knew the milkshakes. But he wasn’t about to tell her that.

“Thought ya were more the bookstores and coffee type.” He mentioned casually.

She lifted a hand and pointed an index finger at him. “Now that makes you a judgy asshole.” She teased.

“I’m right though, aint I?” He snorted in amusement.

Lexie bit her bottom lip briefly as she smiled at him “Maybe. Or maybe I’d surprise you and enjoy a white trash brunch.”

“Really?” He asked suspiciously, tilting his head forward at her and giving her a untrusting look.

“Hell no.” She giggled.

Daryl scooped up a handful of leaves and sticks from beside him and threw them at her over the fire. She rocked back in her spot and shielded her face with her arms, her legs bending at the knees in front of her. Her laughter rang out through the small clearing and it dawned on him how much he liked the sound.  

“OK, if you ever find a jar of pigs feet, I will supply the peanut butter and jelly and diet soda and I will try a white trash brunch.” She beamed as she brushed the leaves from her pants.

“Got yaself a deal” He agreed.

Lexie watched him over the fire, aware that he was now deliberately avoiding looking over at her. She was glad, the smile on her face was showing no signs of leaving any time soon. She liked being with Daryl, he made her laugh and was somehow easier to talk to than most people she knew, which was strange considering he was the least vocal person she had ever met besides herself. When she was with him, both of them seemed to have no problem finding things to say to one another, but it was never forced or for the sake of it. Conversation, when it happened, flowed without so much as a second thought.

 

On the journey back, Lexie had hooked one arm around his front and trailed the other one in the air above her as the motorcycle flew down the highway. Her eyes were pinned closed and she imagined she were back on a road trip, back in a time when she didn’t always feel so displaced, so uneasy and so anxious. The wind tore through her fingers, freezing and rippling her skin but it felt real enough to solidify her desire to spend more time on the outside.

Daryl managed a quick look over his shoulder at her as he kept his arms as still as possible, making sure the bike didn’t swerve. It was like he could sense how free she felt without even having to ask. It was written on her pretty features, it was blowing in her hair and it was in her eyes when she had told him that his feeling like himself outside the walls was more acceptable than he’d thought.

When they returned to Alexandria, Daryl stopped the bike outside Lexie and Mel’s house and she climbed off, heaving her backpack off and dumping it at her feet. Daryl bit down on his bottom lip over and over as he glanced at the bikes controls and then turned to Lexie.

“Same time tomorrow?” he asked.

“I really have to do the rest of my guard shifts this week. I have three. Maybe after that?” She proposed.

He nodded. “Yeah. Alright.”

They locked eyes for a moment, Daryl able to tell that she wanted to say something but wasn’t sure how to. She took a deep breath.

“Um, I think I might know a way to return the favour after all.” She said quietly, aware that people milling about could hear her and get the wrong idea.

“Ya aint gotta do that.” He told her.

“I want to.” She expressed. “Meet me in the space between our houses when it gets dark tonight. Just, wait there and I’ll come get you. Don’t worry, I’m not going to stab you or anything.” She chuckled.

“Damn right ya aint, I got better knife skills than you.” He joked, the grin on his face growing wide when he saw her laugh loudly and step about on the spot, her hands reaching down to grab her bag. He lowered his head, feeling his ears turn a deep shade of pink. _Great._

“Touché” She shot back. “See you later.”

*****

Carol was in the kitchen when Daryl arrived back at the house. She was engrossed in a book that she had propped open on the kitchen island that Daryl recognised as looking the same as the pages he and Lexie had used to gather herbs and plants in the park. Around her, lay all of those plants and herbs, sectioned into categories and labelled. There was a strange smell in the house, much like one of those new age shops that he made a conscious effort to avoid.

“Oh, you’re back. Good. Try this.” She instructed, stepping towards him and holding out a mug of dark liquid that emitted a strange odour of mud and basil with a strange minty hint.

“The hell’s this?” He grumbled as he took the mug.

“Just try it.” She ordered. “I need to see if it’s soothing on the throat, but it could make you vomit.”

“What?!” He exclaimed “Why the hell should I drink it then?!”

“Daryl, you eat insects off the forest floor. You have the strongest stomach out of all of us.”

“Naw!” He refused, handing the mug back to her, she took it and thudded it on the countertop. Carol glared at him, looking him up and down for a few seconds.

“Where have you been?” She probed, picking up a cloth and wiping her hands on it just as a pot on the stove began to boil over. She backed up, flicked the dial off as if it were nothing and continued to stare at him with narrowed eyes.

“On a run with Lexie. Told her I’d teach her some knife skills and we went to check out that camp we saw on the way here. Thought someone might have used it since, could have found ‘em, maybe brought ‘em back if they checked out.” He replied, dipping his hand into a box from the pantry and rummaging through the contents eagerly. Carol slapped his hand away and picked up the box, shooting him a scolding look as she deposited it on the opposite counter.

“She came to me for knife training. She’s better off learning from you.” She considered. “That camp was abandoned when we passed it. You even said yourself it’d be a useless place to hole up.” She reminded him.

“So?” He shrugged.

She paused, neither of them saying anything for a few seconds and Daryl could tell what was coming. 

“I knew you’d be drawn to her.” She said, her voice laced with a more serious tone. She leaned a hip on the counter and crossed her arms.

“Don’t know what ya talkin’ about.” He quickly replied as he began to stalk around the kitchen, looking in cupboards and picking up items from the counter.

“Yes, you do.” She challenged. “She seems nice. A little awkward, but nice.”

“She is” He mumbled.

“She’s pretty. Just like-”

“-Stop it.” He snapped, closing his eyes. “Don’t.”

She moved over to him, placing a hand on his forearm and giving him a sympathetic and apologetic smile.

“OK. I’m sorry. But I do want you to think about something.”

“What’s that?”

“The promise you made.”

Daryl’s eyes dropped to the floor and he backed against the counter, his shoulders slumping.

“I aint forgot.” He said under his breath.

 ***** 

Mel struggled to keep her eyes on her soup with Lexie sat opposite her. She wasn’t exactly sure what she wanted to see. Maybe some glimmer of happiness on her sisters’ features, maybe a certain glow or a look in her eye that would give away what her and Daryl had been doing in the woods all day.

She couldn’t deny she was jealous and suspicious. She had wanted to be the one that was alone with Daryl, she wanted to be the one that he sought out when he was going on a run. She wanted to be taught things by him. There were one or two things that she knew she’d revel in teaching him too. But it wasn’t going to happen. Instead, she had to endure her sister being the one that got to spend time with the guy she had thought of constantly since his arrival and Lexie didn’t even have the decency to have a crush on him.

“Good day outside?” Mel asked, her spoon halfway to her mouth holding the steaming liquid.

Lexie didn’t look up, she just finished reading to the end of the sentence in her book and took another mouthful of soup.

“Mmhmm” She hummed

“Thought you said Deanna would be asking you to do runs together.” Mel stated, her spoon still perfectly still below her chin.

Lexie’s back prickled. She had said that to cushion the blow and now it was backfiring. She lowered her spoon into the bowl gently. 

“Figured there was no point hanging around and waiting to be asked.” She shrugged.

“Oh.” Mel replied, also dropping her spoon into her bowl and stirring her soup. Lexie’s eyes flicked up at her sister.

“I thought you were OK with this.” She uttered “I don’t have to go anywhere with him if you’re not.”

“It’s fine” Mel said through her teeth.

Lexie decided to leave things there before the situation escalated and she was forced to point out that her and Daryl could be friends with whoever they wanted. She picked up her book and bowl and pushed her chair out with her legs.

“I’m going to finish this upstairs” She muttered, leaving the table and her distrustful sister glowering at her.

 ***** 

When night fell and the crickets began to chirp, Lexie picked a CD from the stack on the dresser and slid it into the old-fashioned CD player. Music was allowed in Alexandria provided it was kept to a low volume so as not to attract herds of Walkers and electricity was only allowed for use on such things for a limited time. This suited her fine. Being a night owl and not really one for sleeping much, she would pick a quiet album, light her candles and change her clothes into something comfortable. On this occasion she had chosen some black sweat pants and a grey tank top.  This was one of the few things she would miss if she left Alexandria. Being able to have her own little haven inside four walls with just enough electricity to fire up a CD player. The candles on the shelves and night stands flickered as she moved around the room.

 

Daryl smoked as he waited patiently in between their two houses. Shrouded by the darkness, the tip of his cigarette was the first thing Lexie saw when she appeared at the back of her house.

“Psst” She hissed at him as she beckoned him towards her.

He threw his smoke away and stamped it into the ground before walking over to her.

“Sorry this is a little cloak and dagger.” She apologised “I just don’t want Mel to see us.”

“Why?” He asked.

“She’s being a petulant child tonight. C’mon. Follow me.” She smiled as she turned and rounded the back of the house. She stopped by a long, metal ladder that lead up to the roof. “After you.” She said.

Daryl gave her a confused stare for a moment until he finally opted to just wait and see what was going on. He climbed the ladder, each step seeming like it was echoing throughout the whole of the town but he suspected it was probably all in his head. When he reached the top, he spotted a window and two lanterns either side, hanging on nails that had been hammered into the wooden beams of the house. On the flat roof, were blankets and pillows scattered about. He pulled himself up further and stood up, glancing around at his surroundings.

“It’s one of my perches.” She grinned up at him from the ladder.

He instinctively held a hand out to her. She hesitated for a moment, before taking it and allowing him to help her up the last couple of steps and onto the roof with him. Daryl knew straight away why she was showing him this and why she considered it to be adequate payback for him teaching her new skills. She was letting him into a secret. A quiet, hidden place where she spent time away from everyone.

Lexie suddenly realised he was still holding her hand as they stood side by side on the roof in total silence. She quickly removed her fingers from his grasp and he looked down and awkwardly cleared his throat.

“Take a seat.” She offered, Motioning to the large cushions and pillows that covered the roofs surface. He crouched down and settled with his back against the wall, Lexie sitting beside him with only a small distance between them. She pulled a blanket over her shoulders and rested her head back, admiring the view of trees as far as the eye could see.

“Thought you might like it up here.” She told him. “It’s peaceful. No one knows you’re here because they can’t see you. This house is at the end of the street, only the trees and the stars can watch you here. So, I was going to offer to share it with you, as a thank you. The ladder is always there so you could come up here whenever you want.”

He wasn’t saying anything and she was starting to think that he might be wondering if she’d lost her mind. Minutes passed and he remained speechless.

“You don’t have to stay” She assured him.

Quiet melodies from the Smashing Pumpkins drifted through the window behind him and his hand brushed against something next to him. He glanced down, seeing a pile of books and Lexie’s sketch pad.

“I didn’t know if you’d want to stick around, so I brought some stuff out here.” She felt the need to explain.

Finally, his vision moved to the side, catching her face in the flickering light of the lanterns, her eyes were bright and her skin glowing. Her lips were parted and a single, loose curl drifted at the side of her face. He knew he should speak, knew he should just say something to stop her from fretting. But the words didn’t seem to want to materialise as he sat there and looked at her. It seemed like an eternity before she nervously sucked in a deep breath and resumed gazing at the stars.

“Uh…” She heard him try “This is awesome.”

She regarded him with suspicion, her expression full of doubt.

“You don’t have to lie. It’s fine. This was a stupid idea.” She uttered awkwardly, fiddling with her hands and jabbing at her nail polish in her lap. She laughed quietly to herself.

“Hey” Daryl said, trying to get her to look up at him. Eventually, she did. Albeit reluctantly. “I ain’t lying and it ain’t a stupid idea.”

“You just, weren’t saying anything so I panicked.” She confessed.

“I’m just kinda surprised.” He expressed. “This is great n’ all, but it’s yours. It’s your place. I dunno why you’d wanna share it with me.”

She released a slow breath and pulled the blanket further around her shoulders. She wondered if Daryl seemed to feel the cold much in his sleeveless shirt and leather vest. If he did, there was no sign of it.

“I know that you need it.” She whispered.

She was right. He did need it. He needed somewhere to go that wasn’t on the outside where he could just sit without the interference of anyone else. Where he could just be without the threat of Walkers or the pressure of small talk with people he barely knew. He needed the quiet, the solitude and the stars.

“I don’t mind sharing it with you… I trust you.” She promised.

He grabbed a cushion and threw it behind his back, shuffling down until he was almost horizontal. His arms rested above his head while he examined the sky.

“trust you too.” She heard him say quietly. She wasn’t expecting him to respond.

Lexie mirrored his position, seizing a cushion of her own and joining in his studying of the night sky.

“Gonna be up here all the damn time.” He warned.

“That’s ok.” She replied. “You saw this morning that I have another roof I can sit on at the front of the house. So, when you’re here, I can just be out there.”

Daryl replayed Carol’s words to him over and over in his mind. She had reminded him of something that meant a lot to him, not that he had ever forgotten it. Having not been in a position to have to consider it before, he found himself wanting to build some kind of imaginary wall that no one could knock down. So that the past wouldn’t have to be altered and he wouldn’t have to accept that this could well be what he never thought he would have to deal with. At the same time, the pull towards Lexie was becoming stronger and he couldn’t tell if it was because of the familiarity of her face or because of something else entirely.

“What if I wanna sit with ya?” He questioned.

“Then just say.” She answered.

It had to have been at least three hours that passed while they lay there. Mostly not talking aside from the occasional comment. They had both shuffled around and ended up closer than before, their arms very nearly touching. Lexie had draped a blanket over him when she had noticed that his arm displayed goose-pimples from the cold. He had gladly accepted. When he decided it was time to leave, Lexie had fallen asleep beside him.

Looking over her relaxed slumber, he slid the blanket from his body and sat up, crawling over to the ladder on his hands and knees. He turned and his feet found the metal rungs. He climbed down two of them when Lexie spoke.

“Goodnight Daryl.” She called out sleepily, stretching her arms out above her and yawning.

“Thanks. For this. For tonight.” He whispered, aware that someone on patrol could hear him.

“Anytime.” She smiled hazily at him.

 _She is so pretty. Just like her._ He thought

“G’night” he nodded before he was gone.

 *****

Lexie raised a hand and waved to Aaron, who was sat on his porch as she scuffed along the path towards the house he shared with Eric. From where he sat on the porch, he had a direct view across the street of Mel and Lexie’s front lawn and the street in front of it. He raised an eyebrow as she neared.

“What?” Lexie sighed as she awaited the onslaught of questions.

“Nothing. Nothing.” He dismissed, a little too falsely as he watched her settle on a chair across the table from him. She dropped her arms onto the table and fiddled with the long sleeves on her black hoodie, her hair scraped into a messy braid which meant the shorter strands that wouldn’t quite reach blew delicately around her face in the breeze. It was early evening and Lexie had finished her guard shift and headed straight over to Aaron after seeing him sat outside on his porch.

“Drop the charade.” She warned. “Just ask what you want to ask.”

Aaron leaned forwards and dipped his head in an effort to see her eyes, but she just kept her vision low, almost in her lap.

“Saw you and Daryl come through the gate on the bike yesterday. You were out all day. Had a little chat outside your place” He mused. “You two are getting along well.”

“We’re friends” She mumbled.

“Yeah, sure you are.” He retorted sarcastically.

“Do you really think there’s something more to it to him?” She blurted out, placing a hand on the table and leaning towards him. “I can’t tell. I’m not good at this.”

Aaron grabbed a large jug that was sat on the other side of the table, along with an empty glass and poured her some water. He slid the glass along the table towards her and she took it, bringing it to her lips and feeling the cold liquid journeying down her throat.

“Does it matter to you?” He said, annoying her by answering her question with another question.

“I suppose it does. I trust him. He’s my friend. I don’t want anything to ruin that.” She explained as she rotated the glass between her fingers on the table.

“It doesn’t have to.” Aaron told her. “Do you…do you like him too?”

Her eyes shot up and she stared at him with something akin to fear. She hated this kind of thing. Awkward, elephant in the room conversations that led to her having to discuss sensitive subjects. Despite this, Aaron was a good friend to her, one who she trusted.

“Mel’s going to hate me.” She uttered, her eyes still on his.

“Is that a yes?”

“Maybe. I don’t know.”

“Lex, c’mon, just talk to me.” He urged.

A slow breath exited her lungs while she debated her answer in her head. This was the first time she’d actually sat and thought about Daryl this particular way.

“I like having him as this person that just…gets me. No bullshit. We can sit for hours and not talk but when we do it’s like we’re the same.”

Aaron sat back in his seat, rubbing his chin with his hand and smiling knowingly at her.

“You really are bad at this, huh?” He grinned.

Lexie dipped her fingers into her glass of water and flicked droplets at him, he briefly held his hand up and laughed behind it before dropping it and continuing to press her for an answer.

“You still haven’t answered the question.” He pointed out.

Lexie knew that once the words left her mouth, she wouldn’t be able to take them back and that the disclosure of such information would put her trust in Aaron to the test.

“I can see why Mel likes him so much.” She shrugged.

“Lexie” Aaron warned.

“Fine. Yes. I- I think so. I like being with him. He’s a good-looking guy. He’s interesting and he actually listens to what I say. Believe it or not, he makes me laugh. I’m not- I’m not used to this. I _never_ like _anyone_ like…well, that.” She smiled, sensing a rising giggle in her chest.

Lexie always giggled when she was nervous about awkward or sensitive issues. She had once been scolded by her adoptive mother for laughing at the funeral of a cousin she had never met. She had been so disturbed by seeing her first open casket that she had chuckled loudly in front of the entire family. Her mother figured she found something funny and called her a ‘disturbed little girl’, threatened to take her to therapy and apologised profusely to the immediate family of the deceased. Lexie, in all her 9 years hadn’t ever seen such a sight before and the image of a dead body covered in make up had made her so uneasy that she had giggled out of not knowing what else to do. Now, in front of Aaron, she was doing the same thing. Shielding her wide grin with her hand.

“Sorry, I laugh when I’m nervous.” She informed him, starting to wave her hand in front of her face as if trying to wave away her laugh. “I don’t think he’s into me like that. I still think you’re wrong.” She concluded.

“OK.” He nodded. “You can think that, but I’m not wrong. Deanna made me a recruiter for a reason. I’m good at reading people.”

She rolled her eyes, sitting back and crossing her arms.

“He’s teaching me knife skills. I think Mel’s pissed at me.” She sighed.

“She’s just jealous, she’ll get over it. Give her time.” He suggested.

“Yeah, I hope so.” She replied, getting to her feet and smoothing down her dark blue jeans. “Aaron, please don’t repeat what I’ve told you to anyone.”

He gave her a hurt look. “You know I wouldn’t. Well, provided you keep me informed of any goings on between you two. This is the most drama I’ve seen in a while that doesn’t involve Spencer.” He quipped.

“It’s not supposed to be drama, Aaron!” She hissed, reaching forwards and dipping her fingertips into the water again. As she raised her hand to flick it  at him, he recoiled and held up his hands.

“Alright, alright. My lips are sealed” he promised.

“Nothing is going to happen anyway. Sorry to disappoint you.” She told him when she turned and headed down the steps, her hair blowing in the breeze in wispy curls that had fallen from her braid.

“Lexie.” Aaron called after her. She looked over her shoulder.

“Sooner or later, you’ll see it.” He assured her.

“See what?” She questioned.

“The way he looks at you.”

 *****

Daryl was fanatical about keeping his bike in good condition since losing his last one. It had provided him with some much-needed freedom which meant he was able to cling onto his sanity a little better. In the bright morning sun, he sat on the lawn in front of his house and meddled for over an hour with various different parts of the bike, eventually getting to a point where there was nothing else to be checked or altered and so, he resorted to simply polishing and cleaning whatever chrome parts it contained.

When Eugene had appeared out of nowhere on the sidewalk in front of him, he had lifted his chin in a wordless greeting and carried on with his ritual. Eugene had taken his simple gesture as permission to walk over and start a conversation. To Daryl it was quite the opposite; nothing more than an acknowledgement but he remained quiet anyway, opting for the easier choice of letting Eugene do what he wanted. Just as he reached Daryl, footsteps from behind him caused him to glance around from his uncomfortable, crouching position in front of the bike. Rick was clicking down the path in his cowboy boots, dressed in some kind of policing uniform.

“Costume party I don’t know about?” Daryl jested as he shoved the rag he was using into his back pocket and straightened up.

“If there is, you’d make a great Elmer Fudd” Rick replied smugly, giving Daryl a fake smile.

“Shut up” Daryl smirked.

Rick chuckled to himself and realised that Eugene was stood in front of them, his hands clasped in front of him and the same look on his face that he always wore, like he was in constant pain. His wavy, greasy mullet shone in the bright sun.

“Hey Eugene.” Rick said.

“Hello” Eugene responded in his usual stiff and discomforted drone.

“Somethin’ ya want?” Daryl asked.

“That’s a negative. I was just perusing the area. Perambulating and procrastinating.” Eugene explained.

“I don’t know what the hell you’re sayin’, but OK” Daryl grumbled, confused.

“Daryl, I think maybe you were right.” Rick sighed, placing his hands on his hips. “You were right to try. Maybe this place is alright. Maybe we can stay here.”

Before the group arrived, they had been through so much that any trust they had in another living human was all but gone. Daryl had been no different but Rick had by far been the most adamant that any other people they happened upon posed nothing but a threat and needed to be either avoided or killed. Upon arriving at Alexandria, Daryl had agreed somewhat with Rick’s need to scope the place out, be on their guard and ready for any kind of attack. But after weeks of settling into the community, he had realised that the people around them just wanted to live clinging onto some sense of normality, or some kind of version of what normality used to be. Their intentions, were nothing more than that. Carol had complained at him for being too distant, for not making an effort to settle in. He had told her that he would try and as a result had been given a job, and had even managed to connect with someone that wasn’t a part of his group. Although Daryl still felt confined to the walls of Alexandria, he had indeed been right to try and ultimately, thought were safe to stay.

“Yeah, I think we can.” He mumbled, squinting in the sun that darted through the gap between the two houses behind Rick.

Chatter from across the lawn caused all three of them to glance over to the house next door where Lexie and Mel were walking down the path. Lexie wore boyish blue jeans and an oversized, black V-neck, linen top that hung off one shoulder. Mel had dressed completely differently, in a pair of red shorts and a white tank top. Both women were wearing sunglasses and simultaneously waved at the three men watching them.

“That woman is seriously hot.” Eugene blurted out.

Rick’s head shot around and he gave Eugene a shocked and amused look. “Oh yeah? Which one?”

“He’s talkin’ about Lexie.” Daryl grumbled and he tugged the rag from his back pocket and began shaking it out in front of him.

“Oh, why don’t you go and talk to her?” Rick suggested, hearing Daryl grunt.

Eugene shook his head vigorously and Rick wondered if he was actually going to stop at one point. “That is contrary to what I deem to be wise or sensible. Although her interest in certain literary titles may be a mutually beneficial conversational topic.”

Daryl scoffed loudly “Give it up man, pigs gonna fly before she lets you near her.” He affirmed.

“Did you perform the necessary cloaked interrogation to determine if, in fact she does or does not have a close friend of the male variety?” Eugene questioned.

Rick grinned from one of them to the other continuously, finding the situation humorous enough to make a mental note that he should tell Carol and Michonne later.

“Dude, she aint got one n’ don’t want one either. Told ya. Give it up.” Daryl dismissed, turning his back and running the rag over the forks at the front of the bike.

Eugene shifted nervously on his feet and stole a quick look at Lexie as she ambled down the street with her sister. Remembering the whispers around the town and previous conversations with Mel about her desire to get near Daryl, Rick raised an eyebrow before slapping Daryl lightly on the back as he began to pass.

“Planning to go out today and check out the area outside the walls. See if we can expand somehow or if there’s anything out there we can make use of. Interested?” He asked.

“Yeah. Alright.” Daryl agreed.

 *****

Lexie sat on the wall outside the armoury with Mel, her book grasped in her hands at her lap. As much as she loved her sister, she looked forward to being left alone, so she could throw herself into the world of the classic novel that she had spent the last few days reading. Now, at an unusually slow pace due to her time being spent with Daryl instead. Although she read in his presence, she frequently found that after a while he would ask her what was happening in the story or what her opinion of it was and her concentration would falter. As a result, she found it easier to draw when she was around him.

“I’m sorry if I was a bitch last night.” Mel said, leaning sideways and nudging Lexie’s shoulder with hers. “I didn’t mean it.”

Lexie offered her a small smile and quickly lowered her vision to the book in her lap.

“I know you don’t feel comfortable around most people. So, if you wanna learn stuff and go on runs with Daryl, you should.” Mel concluded.

Lexie’s desire to be as forthcoming with information to Mel as she had been with Aaron was non-existent. She knew her sister acted on impulse, usually having to take herself off and think about things before logic came into the equation so any confessions that she considered Daryl to be reasonably appealing on a level that was higher than just a friendship was just a bad idea altogether. Yet, she did feel like she needed to test the water with a milder disclosure.

“We get along well.” She said quietly as she peered down to the ground, too afraid to see her sister’s reaction.

“Well, that’s not much of a surprise. You’re both moody as fuck.” Mel observed, nudging Lexie’s shoulder again.

“At least I have two brain cells to rub together.” Lexie shot at her, biting her lip to stop herself from laughing at her own joke.

“I’m going to let that slide because I owe you. I’m just going to remind you who got better grades in high school.” Mel responded casually, her sneakers thudding on the wall below her as she swung her legs back and forth.

“You paid me to do your homework.” Lexie muttered, side eyeing Mel with a raised eyebrow.

“And If it weren’t for me teaching you how to wax your eyebrows as part of the payment, you’d have a monobrow that connects with your hairline.” Mel retorted “I guess we’re both business minded in some way.”

“Gotta hustle” Lexie nodded.

“Damn right.” Mel agreed.

She reached up to the side of Lexie’s face, pushing a strand of hair out of her eyes and behind her ear. Her brown hair was loosely brushed back into a braid that Mel had insisted she let her create. Her nose was slightly decorated with light, subtle freckles and her perfectly shaped eyebrows were a result of Mel’s constant reminders though her teenage years that she needed to ‘keep her face tidy’.

“I’m pretty hot.” Mel stated. Lexie looked up in disbelief. “But you’re beautiful, Lex.”

“Stop” Lexie scoffed, raising a hand and brushing Mel’s arm away from her. Her cheeks flushed with warmth.

“Beautiful and still can’t take a compliment gracefully at 34 years of age” Mel mused.

“OK, thank you. Now, haven’t you got to go and find another victim?” Lexie asked.

“You’re right, I do. Got a busy day ahead of me. All the batting of eyelashes and the bending over in these shorts is exhausting y’know.” She hopped off the wall, straightened her clothing and grinned. “Catch ya later.”

“Stay away from Spencer.” Lexie called after her as she watched her strut down the street towards Deanna’s place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just want to thank everyone again for reading this <3


	7. Chapter 7

The colour was wearing on the red table top in the armoury. Lexie polished it so much as part of her morning ritual on her shift that it had stared to fade around the edges. It never needed polishing, it was always shiny, clean and tidy, yet Lexie was a creature of habit and routinely contributed to the waning colour. As she ran a duster over the surface, her mind wandered as it usually did when she was performing mundane tasks. Her determination to leave Alexandria had been successfully knocked down a peg or two thanks to Daryl. She had enjoyed her time with him and looked forward to learning more, being a passenger on his bike again and possibly seeing him on the roof at the back of her house.

She knew he was the only reason she had reconsidered leaving. He had made an effort with her regardless of if it was dressed up as some other ulterior motive and for that, she was both grateful and slightly mystified. Aaron was guilty of planting the idea that Daryl’s intentions were more than that of a friend, and now the thought constantly flitted around at the back of her mind every day.

She moved around the desk and slumped down in the chair, picking up her clipboard and beginning a visual count of all the guns lined up along the wall. When Rick and Daryl appeared in the doorway, Lexie refused to look up until she’d finished counting the wall, not wanting to have to start all over again. When she’d finished, she jotted down the number and slapped the clipboard on the desk.

“Hey Lexie” Rick said “We’re heading out for the day, need to check out some guns.”

“Morning. Sure. Daryl knows the drill.” She responded, waving a hand at them.

Daryl set about choosing guns, wandering around the entire room with Rick and discussing between themselves what they should take. Lexie, who had leaned back in her chair and got her book out of her bag, peered at them over the pages as they debated the best handguns to take.

“Glock 27” She called out.

Daryl and Rick both turned to face her, a hint of a smile passed across Daryl’s lips at Lexie’s confident suggestion. _Nothing’s changed there. She still knows her stuff._

“It’s accurate, controllable and small enough for an ankle holster.” She confirmed.

Rick smiled at her and nodded a thanks as Daryl collected the guns. He also picked up Rick’s Python that Lexie had admired since he’d first arrived with it and she’d noticed it in amongst the plethora of weapons they’d surrendered that day. Placing everything on the desk in front of her, Daryl caught her eye and she closed her book and opened the ledger. The corner of his mouth quirked up into a half smile before he took a pen from the pot and filled in the necessary details.

“We’re heading out to search the area around this place, see if we can expand somehow. Any tips on where to start?” Rick asked Lexie.

“Not really.” She replied quietly

Lexie opened the drawer next to her and pulled out the map just as Daryl finished writing and spun the book around so she could counter sign it. She scribbled her signature and swapped the book for the map, unfolding it and smoothing it out on the surface. She handed Daryl the red dry wipe marker and he and Rick deliberated over where their destination should be. When Daryl marked an X in a square, Lexie visibly smarted.

“What is it?” Daryl asked.

Her eyes raised slowly, moving from Rick’s face to Daryl’s.

“That’s not a smart move.” She muttered. “It’s a quarry full of Walkers’, I mean thousands. They’re blocked from getting out by trucks.”

Rick tilted his head as he looked at the map, considering the distance and no doubt deciding what vehicle to take, along with if they needed more than two people. Daryl shoved a Glock 27 into his waistband, handing the other one and the Python to Rick.

“We’ll take a look. Thanks, Lexie.” Rick concluded.

“Deanna has forbidden anyone to go there. It’s dangerous over that way.” She warned.

“We can handle it. I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tell her where we’re going.” Rick pleaded.

Lexie merely nodded slightly, deliberately not agreeing or disagreeing to anything.  

Both of them started for the door and Lexie suddenly felt an unexpected and strong urge to stop Daryl.

“Daryl, I might have some bolts that fit your crossbow.” She called out.

He stopped in his tracks and glanced at her through his hair. She figured he must have been able to tell she wanted him to hang back on his own. Her eyes were wide and pleading and her body language had become taut in a display of anxiety.

“Go on up, I’ll be right there.” He told Rick, who nodded and carried on up to the street.

He stayed by the door, regarding her with uneasiness. She slowly stood up and briefly picked her nail polish as she sighed and stepped closer to him.

“I don’t have any bolts.” She admitted.

“I know.” He said. “Why’d ya lie?”

Lexie realised it was the second time in as many days that she had fabricated the truth. First to Mel to cover up that Daryl had offered to take her outside the walls more often and now to Daryl, because she wanted to say something to him on his own and out of Rick’s earshot.

“I-I don’t know. I just wanted to tell you to be careful.” She stammered, all too aware that she sounded like she really cared about him and maybe that was because she actually did.

“I will.” He promised.

*****

Rick pushed through the trees, his eyes squinted in the sun. The noise of a mass of Walkers up ahead grew closer and closer. Daryl crept along behind him, crossbow raised and loaded. His hair stuck to his face in a mass of sweaty, dark, wavy lines. Daryl had always had Rick’s back, always being right behind him and ready to defend the unelected leader of the group at a moment’s notice. While they had endured their tough time’s, Daryl’s loyalty to Rick had never faltered.

When he came to a sudden stop, Rick raised a hand above his shoulder, telling Daryl to stay put and stay quiet. The noise was now louder than ever and Daryl could tell without even having to see for himself that they were dealing with a massive number of Walkers.

“Holy shit.” Rick breathed from in front.

Daryl side stepped and shoved some branches out of the way to reveal a vast and deep pit that was thronging with Walkers. So many he couldn’t even begin to estimate the numbers, but it had to be well into the thousands.

“Never seen so many all at once.” He grumbled.

“Yeah, they get outa of there and they’re going to do a lot of damage.” Rick affirmed.

As his eyes scanned the scene, Daryl spotted four trucks at the entrance what were blocking the Walkers in. They were at such odd angles from being pushed and shoved constantly that they were threatening to give way and create an opening that would be enough to let a trickle of Walkers through that would only expand with time, creating a huge horde that would end up heading straight for Alexandria.

“We have to do something about this.” Rick confirmed.

“Aint gonna be easy. Need one hell of a plan. Plenty of people too.” Daryl expressed.

The thing that struck him most was the smell, thousands of rotting corpses gave off a thick, putrid and stomach-churning odour that seemed to rise with the heat. That, and the many wasted materials, tools and machinery that they could use to expand and fortify the walls of Alexandria that were sitting there, useless.

“Yeah, we’re going to have to tell Deanna, maybe bring some of the others out to take a look. C’mon, lets go.” Rick ordered, turning around and re-tracing his steps.

*****

When they returned to Alexandria, Deanna was waiting for them at the gate having been informed of their trip by Lexie. She stood with her arms crossed in front of her, a smile on her face and the breeze blowing her hair delicately.

“Good afternoon, gentlemen.” She beamed.

Lexie could see everything from the wall outside the armoury. She could have kept quiet about her knowledge of their trip. She could have erased the ‘X’ Daryl had made on the map and decided not to walk across the road to Deanna’s place and tell her that Rick and Daryl were going to the quarry. She had faced an internal battle between keeping quiet and respecting and trusting their intentions and abilities, or allowing themselves to get too far deep into something that was potentially extremely dangerous. She had deliberated for over an hour, but her head and her heart were telling her two different things. Having never trusted her heart before, this one time, she decided to go with it.

“I understand you took a little drive to the quarry.” Denna said as Daryl swung his crossbow from his shoulder. Lexie could see his arms glistening in the sun even from her distance away. She hoped he wouldn’t be mad at her, but even if he was, she stood by her choice.

“Yeah, wanted to check it out. Those trucks aren’t going to hold much longer.” Rick explained, dismissing the fact that she had somehow found out where they’d been and getting straight to the point. “We need to figure out how to move that herd before they break out of there and head straight here.”

“Those trucks have held for months” Denna cut in.

“Yeah? They aint gonna hold for another month unless we do somethin’. There’s a lot of stuff we could use in there too” Daryl offered.

Deanna’s smile dropped while she studied the two strong and capable men in front of her. She had agreed to bring them into Alexandria for a reason, because she trusted them and trusted their judgement. Now, they were telling her something that to them, was of paramount importance.

“Daryl, you are relieved of any guard duties and recruiting can be postponed for now. Rick, if you can come up with a viable plan, I’d be interested to hear it. You’ll need help but people around here will be reluctant to put themselves in harm’s way. You convince me you plan is the safest you can think of and I will try my hardest to get you some backup.”

Rick un-holstered his guns and nodded at Deanna. “Alright.” He agreed. “Give me a few days to come up with something. In the meantime, we need to get another truck parked across where it could open. Buy ourselves some time.”

“OK, Take your pick. Get back to me when you’ve figured it out.” She decided.

Daryl had already started off in the direction of the armoury when Rick called out to him and handed him his guns. He took them and resumed his path.

Lexie scrabbled off the wall as if it were electrocuted, dropping her book in the process and part of her dying inside when she realised her bookmark had fallen out and she had lost her place. She fumbled around on the floor, grabbing everything and flew down the stairs, throwing it all on the desk, her sunglasses clattering across the top. She sat in the chair and took a deep breath. Readying herself for Daryl being angry with her.

 

When he walked through the door, she was too nervous to look at him. She licked her lips and kept her head low. He walked over to the shelving units and replaced the guns before stopping in front of the desk and placing the boxes of ammunition in front of her. She still hadn’t looked up, more worried about his reaction then she’d anticipated.

“Never had ya down as a snitch.” He said.

She slowly looked up at him, the air leaving her lungs in a wash of relief when she saw a smile on his face.

“I’m sorry.” She whispered.

“Why’d ya tell her?” He questioned.

Lexie swallowed hard and dropped her gaze, she tried to focus on the edge of the table, where the colour was fading away instead of her nervousness about having to confess her reasons why she had told on them.

“If you got into trouble out there, she would have needed to know so we could arrange a search party.” She divulged.

“Well, we were gonna tell her anyway. Trucks aint gonna hold. We’re gonna come up with a plan to get all those Walkers outta there. Can use a lot of the equipment down there too.” He explained.

“That’s good.”

She opened the ledger and signed the weapons back in, spinning the book around and allowing him to do the same. She could feel him stealing glimpses of her every now and then.

“Thanks. See ya around.” He grumbled.

As he went to leave, she was leaned back in her chair, picking the nail polish from one of her thumbnails.

“I told her because I was worried.” She announced against her better judgement. Daryl stopped just in front of the door and shoved his hands in his pockets. He was staring at her sideways, his shoulders slumped forwards.

“Worried about what?” He pressed.

She instantly regretted saying anything at all. Her mind raced as she grappled with panic and tried to find something to say that would make her look less like she’d acted out of pure interest in his welfare. It was contrary to the truth, but she didn’t want him to know that she cared so much. Or did she? Why had she even opened her mouth in the first place? She should have just let him leave.

“You.” She said under her breath.

He moved closer to her, so quietly that she hadn’t noticed at first. When she looked up, she saw that he was nibbling on his bottom lip.

“Ya aint gotta worry about me.” He mumbled. “I’m good.”

“OK” She nodded.

“Um… I dunno if im’ma see ya much in the next few days. Gotta help Rick with the quarry.” He told her, feeling the need to explain his upcoming absence to her.

“I figured.” She replied.

“I’ll check in with ya when I can.”

“It’s fine, Daryl. Go, do your thing.” She smiled. “Just be safe.”

“Alright, later.”

He left the room and she slid down in her chair, huffing loudly and threading her fingers into her hair at her temples. She had no idea why, but his presence was increasingly turning her into a complete mess, much to her irritation.

*****

Over the next week, Daryl was out every day while he helped to formulate a plan with Rick. Some nights, he even decided to stay outside the walls and Lexie guessed he didn’t see much point in returning for a few hours only to have to get up and leave again. Rick had stayed with him and Deanna had grown restless at their disappearance, needing to be updated but having no choice but to be patient.

Mel had also got wind that Daryl didn’t seem to be around and had pestered Lexie not only for an explanation but for a return date. She had given her nothing, knowing she would only resume her leering at him no matter what he was doing and it only made Lexie’s veins spike with a surprising anger that she wasn’t used to.

She had utilised her rooftop sanctuary for most of the week when she wasn’t in the tower and grew agitated, annoyed and bewildered when she recognised that she could think of nothing but Daryl. She wondered what he was doing, where he was sleeping, if he was safe and if he ever thought about her.

She was unhappy with herself, for allowing herself to fall into what she could only describe as an obsession with him that wasn’t unlike Mel’s. But she was not Mel and her desire to act upon anything she was feeling was non-existent. She was also more than aware that her interest in him ran much deeper than just a physical attraction. Yes, he was attractive but he also made her feel like she was allowed to be herself.

After seven days, Lexie had taken an extra tower shift to keep herself occupied. If she hadn’t taken it, she would have scaled the wall and gone to search for Daryl and Rick herself. In a brief visit to Aaron and Eric’s place on the way to the tower, Aaron had assured her that both Rick and Daryl were the most capable and effective fighters he had ever seen. He also told her how smart they were and how their working together equalled a force to be reckoned with, even for a herd of thousands of Walkers. Lexie confided in him that she couldn’t think about much else and it was driving her insane. Eric had looked confused the whole time until Aaron had done a double take at him and casually told him that ‘Lexie and Daryl have feelings for one another and Mel can’t know.’ Eric had held his hands up and protested at being told the information, not wanting to keep anything from Mel, he left the room.

She held up a hand in greeting at the two passing guards below, who returned the gesture and continued their hushed conversation. As she leaned on the wooden ledge, she fiddled with her fingernails and drew the sleeves of her hoodie further down, over her hands to keep out the cold air. When the gate rumbled open, she stood up straight, her eyes fixed on the moving, metal structure. Her heart leapt when she saw Daryl and Rick stood side by side.

They passed through the gate and Daryl briefly paused, checking each person on guard duty before craning his neck to look up at the tower. Lexie smiled down at him and tried to quell her excitement as she saw him stride straight to the tower door and heard him climb the ladder. For a fleeting second, she raised her hands on the way to fixing her hair but stopped halfway. Why did she care what her hair looked like? She hadn’t before. She shook her head quickly and went back to leaning on the ledge, trying to look as casual as possible.

_Is this really how frustrating it is to have a crush on someone?!_

When he appeared at the top of the ladder, he initially said nothing. He only looked her up and down and sighed.

“Hey stranger.” She smiled.

“Hey.” He answered.

“You look tired.” She observed.

“Thanks.” He said, rolling his eyes.

“No, I’m serious, you should just go to bed.” She suggested. She had expected him to be tired, but he was exhausted.

“I’m fine, thought ya might want company.” He expressed, stepping closer to her and leaning on the ledge beside her, the rifle between them.

She gave him a sympathetic and grateful look.

“I never want company.” She shrugged. “I mean, you’re the exception. But, I’m good up here. Honestly. Go and get some sleep.”

“Naw.” He quickly responded.

“Daryl, please” She pleaded.

He thought for a moment. He was tired, his bones felt like they’re made of chalk now he’d finally stopped and taken a minute and his head was fuzzy. His eyes were heavy and he could probably curl up at her feet and sleep for a week. But everything in him was telling him that he wanted to stay. He had been away for seven days and with the passing of each 24 hours, he began to realise that he thought about her a lot.

“Sure ya don’t want me to stay?” he mumbled.

“Yeah. No. I mean, I do, but you need sleep. Go.” She urged. She had waited for what seemed like months to see him, when it had only been a matter of days, but when she had seen how drained he looked, all she wanted him to do was get some rest.

He nodded and turned to climb down the ladder, he paused, his head slightly held to one side with his vision low. Lexie registered it straight away and was now on tenterhooks. What was he building up to saying?

“I don’t like not seein ya.” He mumbled.

Her heart raced in her chest. Heavy silence. Aaron was right after all. She liked him. She knew she did. But witnessing the hints that he might feel the same was alarming to her, worrying in way as the friendship they both shared could be compromised if anything more was said and that was something she would never want to do. But, it was now more obvious than it had ever been and the thing that really bothered her, was the feeling of happiness that it gave her.

“Sorry, that sounds… weird” He apologised.

“N-no. It doesn’t.” She stammered, unsure if she should say anything else but everything in her heart was telling her to be honest with him. “I… missed you.”

He became completely still, his eyes fixed on her. Lexie thought it looked like he was about to accuse her of lying, his face was etched with disbelief.

“Ya did?” he asked.

“Yes”

He was still staring at her and she felt like hours had passed before he finally spoke.

“Missed ya too.”

She shot him a shy smile and dropped her eyes to the floor. He cleared his throat, shifted on the spot and tried with everything in him not to let himself indulge in this moment too much. Yes, she was pretty and yes, he wanted to spend time with her, but he didn’t yet know if it was because of the memories she provoked in him, or because it was actually her that he was seeing.

“Rick’s gonna call a meetin’ soon. Whole town at Deanna’s place. If ya want, I can take ya out for a couple hours tomorrow. Y’know, if ya ain’t in the armory. Pick up ya training.” He suggested, changing the subject.

“OK. That’d be good.” She nodded.

“Alright” He grunted, turning back to the ladder where he hesitated once more, rubbing his chin with his hand.

“Daryl.” She whispered

“Yeah?”

“Go home.”

“Right. Yeah. See ya.”

*****

Outside the walls, they had travelled far enough out from Alexandria on the bike that they were most definitely in the middle of nowhere. Lexie had directed him to an abandoned farm that she had Mel had previously stayed at. She chose it for its peaceful surroundings and spacious land that enabled them to see any potential threats before they got too close. It also meant that the sound of the Motorcycles engine was drowned out in the vast space before it hit any ears belonging to Walkers.

They spent over two hours knife training and Daryl was astonished by how quickly Lexie seemed to learn things. She was an attentive and intuitive student and asked questions about things she didn’t understand or needed a reason for to be able to proceed. He had equipped her with a sharp stick he’d found on the ground, not wanting to bring real knives into the equation just yet. He knew his decision was the right one when she lunged forwards, swiping at him with the twig, centimetres from his throat. A small burst of air flittering over his skin from the movement. She quickly backed up and clamped a hand over her mouth in shock.

“Woah, lucky that’s just a stick!” He exclaimed.

“I know, I would have slit your throat!” She gasped.

“Naw, I’m too fast for ya.” He smirked.

“Ooh someone likes to big themselves up!” She laughed, throwing the twig at him.

“Aint nothin’ wrong with a little self-assurance.”

“Mysterious _and_ modest.” She joked.

She side stepped and swiped a bottle of water from the ground beside her bag, which she’d dropped by the trunk of a tree they had been training under, the shade providing some welcome relief from the sun. Lexie had brought a rifle with her complete with a scope and fitted with a silencer. She drank a quarter of the bottle before offering it to Daryl. He held up a hand and shook his head and she screwed the cap back on and dropped it back on the floor. Then, she retrieved her rifle and an empty beer can that had been resting on the grass a few feet away and started across the field they were in.

“Where ya goin’?” He asked.

“It’s my turn to be modest!” She yelled back at him.

He lowered himself to the ground under the tree, lighting a smoke and watching Lexie wander across the empty field. He chuckled to himself when he noticed her begin to skip and he was sure he could hear her singing. It was obvious that she wasn’t lying when she said she felt free outside the walls. Her whole demeanour changed and she was more playful, and happy. He liked that about her and considered himself lucky that he was able to perceive this side of her that no one else at Alexandria could. 

When she returned, Daryl’s eyebrow was raised in a challenging expression. He pointed to the now tiny can atop a fence around 300 metres away.

“I know you have no faith in me. But I’ll have you know that I am an excellent marksman.” She boasted as she got to the floor and set up her rifle. His eyes fell over her body as she lay on her front on the grass. Her cropped, black, camo pants hugged all the right places and her dark green shirt was doing the same. He couldn’t help but notice the appealing curve of her waist and eventually forced himself to look away, not wanting to be ogling her like some kind of creep.

“Ya ain’t gonna hit that from here. No way.” He dismissed as she checked the scope and got comfy.

“You wanna bet?” she shot back.

“Hell yeah I wanna bet.”

“Modest and a gambler. OK, let me drive the bike back if I win.” She suggested.

“I ain’t riding bitch on the back! It’s my bike!” He exclaimed.

Lexie laughed loudly before offering him a fake sympathetic look.  

“Apparently I’m going to lose this bet so you don’t have to worry about that.” She reasoned.

“Alright.” He huffed.

What Daryl wasn’t going to tell her was that his forfeit sounded more like a prize. The chance to sit close to her and hold on to her waist wasn’t something he would turn down and he hoped with everything he had that she would hit the can.

The shot was louder than either of them had anticipated but the noise was nothing compared to the bullseye hit to the can that resulted in Lexie rolling over onto her back and casually resting her arms behind her head. An expression of complete satisfaction was written on her features and Daryl sucked his bottom lip into his mouth while he fought with the urge to lower his eyes to her partially exposed stomach. He struggled to hide the wide grin on his face and scuffed about with his boots on the ground. Finally, he looked down, his hand covering his mouth as he chewed on the side of his finger. Lexie waited patiently for him to look at her and when he did, she could see how bashful he looked.

“You win” He grumbled.

“I win.” She echoed.

“Impressive”

“Thank you. It’s my superpower. Only thing I’m really good at.” She said as she sat up and picked up the rifle. She flapped a hand against the back of her pants, discarding any stray grass and dust.

“Don’t talk shit. You’re good at other stuff.” He argued.

“Like what?” She asked, catching his eye.

“Won’t let me see ‘em but I bet ya good at drawin'. You know your guns too. Oh, and uh, you're like a book critic.”

She laughed again, an almost musical sound to him. Her cheeks formed two, perfect dimples when she smiled and he didn’t know if he’d ever get tired of seeing her eyes light up like they did when she found something genuinely amusing. He held up a finger, silencing her momentarily.

“Also, ya good at makin’ everybody think ya real shy with nothin to say. But ya just don’t shut up sometimes.” He jested.

“What, like you, right now?” She grinned.

“Then there’s the comebacks.” He continued.

Her giggles softened and she gradually grew quieter as she slung her rifle over her shoulder and picked up her bag. Intermittently her eyes met his before she awkwardly tore them away but they soon moved back and Daryl was doing the same.

“Maybe some other stuff I don’t know about yet.” He suggested.

“Other stuff? What other stuff might I be good at?” Now, she was daring him, pushing him and she had no idea why. It was out of character for her, but something in her mind was clawing away, desperate to see how he would take such a bold question. He made a small tutting noise and wandered around nervously in front of her. She felt a surge of apprehension out of nowhere.

_You’re flirting with him! Stop it!_

“I ain’t answering that. C’mon, sniper one.” He jibed, flicking his head in the direction of the bike.

 

After checking her rifle in, she brought the bike to a smooth stop outside her house and Daryl was impressed by her bike handling skills. As much as he didn’t want to be a passenger, he had secretly enjoyed clutching onto her as she sped through the streets and back lanes on the way back to the town. She killed the engine and he climbed off the bike, allowing her to do the same before he took her place in the driver’s seat and handed her backpack to her. She swallowed hard and backed away from him, along the path to her house.

“Thanks for the lesson and for losing the bet and letting me drive.” She said quietly.

He scanned the streets. It was late afternoon and the sun was beginning to sink below the horizon. People were finishing up their day jobs and heading back to their houses. Not much unlike the way things were before the turn. He could smell someone cooking something and it reminded him how hungry he was. When he got back to the house, he told himself he would have a smoke on the porch before foraging in the kitchen for food. He chose his words carefully, not wanting to appear either dismissive or flirtatious, but somewhere in between.

“It’s something else you’re good at.” He shrugged. His comment made her smile again, that same, wide, attractive smile from before. She took a couple more steps back, holding her bag in front of her.

“You said…” She started, re-evaluating her choice half way through the sentence. “…You said I don’t shut up sometimes”.

Worried he’d offended her, Daryl switched to apologetic mode.

“I didn’t mean-”

“-It’s only you I’m like that with.” She declared, interrupting him.

“What about Mel?” He asked.

“It’s not the same.” She replied. “Anyway, I gotta go. See ya.”

Before he could say anything else, she had hopped up the steps and entered the house. Her words lingered like a strong perfume, dissipating in the air but the effect not leaving his mind as he moved off to his house next door.

 

Mel was stood in the middle of the living room when Lexie arrived home. The windows were open and the drapes billowed in the evening breeze. Lexie could smell burning and concluded that Mel had been trying a new recipe that hadn’t turned out so well. She dumped her bag on the stairs and kicked off her boots before padding into the room and sitting on the arm of the couch.

Mel’s stance and expression immediately caught her attention. Her arms were folded and her vision was fixed, her jaw was pulled tight.

“What the fuck was that?” she snapped.

“What?” Lexie said.

“That. Out on the road. You’re flirting with him now?” She asked.

“What?! No! What did you hear that you consider to be flirting, Mel?!” She cried, standing up and feeling her chest tighten with anger.

“I didn’t hear what was said, it was written all over your faces!” Mel’s voice was now at shouting level and Lexie prepared herself for what was no doubt about to become another impulsive and dramatic scene led by a woman who acted first and thought later.

“Mel, we’re friends.” Lexie said calmly.

“For now! Jesus, Lex! You spend your entire life living like a nun, being fucking frigid and now you’re interested in the guy that I like!” Mel fumed.

“I’m not- Mel, just listen to me-” Lexie tried, aware she had just told yet another lie. She was interested, albeit secretly and with no intentions to make it a big deal.

“No! Why would you do this?! Why would you go for a guy like that when you’re nothing but a weird virgin girl who doesn’t even talk to anybody? You just live through your books and your freaky poetry and your black clothes. It’s pathetic and sad!”

Then, something in Lexie snapped. 

“Pathetic?! I'll tell you what's pathetic! Your jealousy, Mel. You can't stand the fact that Daryl didn't want you, that he's the only guy that has ever rejected you like that. But y'know what? You are so fucking self-absorbed you can't even see that he's a decent enough person to have told you no instead of using you like Spencer does. I'd rather be a weird, virgin, bookworm than somebody's fucking leftovers. Do yourself a favour, pick your self-respect up out of the trash and stay out of mine and Daryl's business. I'm glad he rejected you, you're not good enough for him.” Lexie spat as she turned and thumped up the stairs, grabbing her bag on the way.

 *****

In her room, she slammed the door and fell backwards, her shoulder blades thudded against the wood and she took a few deep breaths to try and fight the rage that was thundering through her body. She looked down at her shaking hands. Rarely did she get so angry, Mel was the only one that seemed to be able to provoke such a response in her. Tears brimmed in her eyes and in that moment, she hated her sister just that little bit more for making her cry on top of everything else.

She left the door, swooping down and gathering her bedsheets and as many pillows and cushions as she could carry in her arms. She opened the back window and threw them outside onto the roof, seizing a lighter and her bag and climbed outside. After spending some time lighting the lanterns and arranging the blankets. She settled back against the wall with her knees drawn up and her hands covering her face, now catching the tears that were finally escaping after being held back. Her shoulders juddered and she heaved in strained breaths.

She jumped at the sound of a creak from the ladder on the other side of the roof and embarrassment consumed her when she saw Daryl stood at the top, his hands gripped around the metal. He said nothing and climbed up onto the roof, walking over to her and sitting down beside her. Lexie sniffed and frantically wiped her tears away, using the blanket to dry her face and shuffling around so he couldn’t see her face.

“I heard it. The whole thing.” Daryl uttered. He had heard almost every single word as he sat and smoked on his porch. It had taken every ounce of self-restraint for him to stay put instead of barging through the door and yelling at Mel himself.

Lexie released an angry sigh and a sarcastic, faked laugh.

“Course you did.” She groaned, angrily batting more tears away and turning her face further away from him. There were a lot of things that Lexie never did and crying without good reason was one of them. She rarely shed tears through sadness, when she did cry, it was usually always through anger. Even when she was a child and was given up by her mother, she had cried through the night, every night for months from the burning rage that festered inside her.

“Want me to go?” He enquired.

Lexie thought for a moment. She was humiliated and horrified at the prospect of him seeing her cry, but she really, really didn’t want him to leave.

“Stay. Please.” She whispered.

“Alright… She said a lot of mean shit to ya.” He said.

“Yeah, it’s not the first time. I said some awful things too. I guess she speaks the truth when she loses her temper.” She sniffed.

“Naw. It’s bullshit it what it is. Ya aint pathetic or sad. The other stuff… well, she don’t know what she’s talking about.”

“Thank you.” She said sincerely, unable to believe that he’d turned up to tell her that. She felt the need to address the elephant in the room.

“I’m not frigid. Or a virgin. I just haven’t found the right person. Or anyone I like that much” She blurted out, regretting it immediately.

“Don’t. Ya don’t have to explain anythin’ to me.”

“OK. Uh… right. Yeah.” She stammered.

_Why did I say that?! Oh my god!_

Wanting the ground to open up and swallow her, she sat in a rigid state of uncertainty, absolutely mortified by the evening’s events. Daryl shocked her even more when she shifted closer to her and leaned forwards, taking hold of another blanket at her feet. He pulled it up, draping it over her legs and arms.

“Here. You’re shakin’.”

She slowly grasped the edge of the blanket and tugged it up to cover her shoulders. His caring and thoughtful gesture spoke volumes to her. Inside the mysterious and rough exterior of Daryl, hid a certain gentleness that she was both stunned and grateful to have been able to see.

"I meant what I said...about you." She mentioned. "You are too good for her."

"Stop" He grumbled.

The black cat that sometimes showed up at their home emerged from the open window to Lexie’s room and slinked down onto the roof on the other side of her. He purred loudly and arched his back, willing her to stroke along his spine. She lifted her hand and tickled along the animals soft, pitch black fur. 

“Hey, Poe.” She whispered.

“Poe?” Daryl queried.

“Yeah, he’s a boy. I’m a poetry fan. So, I named him after Edgar Allen Poe.” She said.

Poe’s ears twitched and he began to knead at the blanket, extending and withdrawing his claws over and over until he finally settled down in a circular, silky mass of black fur.

“He just kinda moved in one day. Haven’t seen him for a while though. Thought he’d moved on or maybe somebody ate him”

“He likes ya.” Daryl pointed out.

“Yeah, I think I was probably a cat in another life.” She smiled. “Why did you come up here?” She questioned out of the blue, hearing him growl subtly in his throat as he thought of a response.

“Same reason you snitched on me to Deanna.” He sighed, tilting his head back and resting it on the wall behind.

“I snitched on you because I care about you.” She said, figuring nothing else she could say could possibly make her any more embarrassed than she already was.

“I know.” He said.

Lexie stopped talking and took a second to look out over the trees and take in what he was implying. He cared about her. The thought it’s self was hard to believe, yet there he was, sat right next to her and he’d seen her cry and hadn’t ran for the hills.

“Listen, about what Mel said…I-I don’t know where she got it from and I don’t want things to be awkward between us-“

“-They ain’t. Are they?” he interrupted.

“Well, no.”

“So, stop it. Stop goin over it all.” He scolded.

Her face was puffy from crying and her eyes were still bloodshot but she still managed to give him a small smile followed by a loud sniff and a huff that told him she thought he was right and that she was going to take heed of his advice. She craved something unfamiliar that took a while to reveal its self to her, surfacing in the forefront of her mind and stupefying her for a few minutes. She actually needed some kind of physical contact.

_I just need to be a little bit closer to him._

Taking a huge risk, she slid closer and leaned her head on his shoulder. He didn’t move an inch but peered down at her as if she were some timid, delicate flower that could blow away in the breeze. She exhaled slowly and steadily and he could see her shoulders literally drop as she relaxed. The sensation of her leaned against his arm meant his skin tingled and he had to fight to keep his breathing steady. He noticed her hand laying next to his and wanted so badly to thread his fingers into hers.

 _Is that going too far? I don’t know. Shit._ _What the hell is this?!_

She stayed there and he did not move her. He didn’t dare in case she moved away and he was left longing for her to come back. The longer she sat there, the more used to it he became and the more it dawned on him how much he needed this as much as she did.

 

Hours had soon passed and both of them had fallen asleep. Daryl awoke with one of the blankets thrown over him, only able to assume that Lexie had woken up in the night and covered him up before going back to sleep and taking up a similar position to before, only now he noticed her arm was wound around his, her hand very nearly clustered into his fingers and she was fast asleep against his bare bicep, which now hummed with the warmth from her cheek.

He didn’t want to move but his entire body had gone numb, he couldn’t feel his legs and desperately needed to stand up and encourage the blood flow to his limbs. But Lexie looked peaceful, laying on her side atop of a pile of cushions and cocooned in a black blanket, using him as pillow. Poe had also been there for hours and now stretched his limbs out in front and behind him and yawned as he tiptoed towards the edge of the roof and vanished over the top.

He studied her face as much as he could from the awkward angle, reminding himself that although she was clutching onto him, they were still just friends. He didn’t know what he thought about that, but after some earlier, minor worries, their close proximity and marginal physical contact had all ended up feeling rather easy to get used to. Eventually, she stirred and opened her eyes. She blinked rapidly and Daryl could tell the exact moment when she had remembered what had happened and where she was.

She shot up in her spot and scrabbled backwards, bringing her hand up to her face and rubbing her eyes.

“Mornin’.” He rasped.

“What time is it? Oh- Oh no, was I… was I asleep on you?!” She demanded, her voice shaky and unsure

“Yeah. It’s probably around 6am.”

“Oh shit. I know I woke up and you were- you were so cold. So, I covered you up but I didn’t mean to go back to sleep. I’m so sorry.” She apologised.

“What for?”

“I-I didn’t mean to sleep on you. Jesus. I probably drooled. Did I drool? Oh god.” She panicked.

“Ya didn’t drool, Lexie.” He responded with an amused grin on his face. She began to calm slightly, rubbing her face with her hand and tugging on the elastic in her hair. Her loose curls fell around her shoulders and Daryl held his breath for a moment.

_She is so much like her with her hair like that._

“I never usually let anybody touch me. But I think I just needed some kind of contact. I’m sorry.” She expressed, biting her bottom lip.

“Stop sayin’ that. S’alright. Wasn’t so bad.” He smiled shyly. “I gotta get goin’, think this meetin' at Deanna’s is in a couple hours.”

“Yeah, ok.”

He got to his feet slowly, feeling like his bones were twice the age they actually were after being in the same position for hours, but he wasn’t about to complain. He turned and began to descend the ladder.

“Thank you.” Lexie called out “for letting me sleep on your arm. It- uh, it was a good pillow.” She joked awkwardly. And it was. She wasn’t the type of girl to waste time ogling men like Mel, bit she could still indulge in some quiet appreciation of what she considered to be probably the nicest arms she’d seen in all her years.

“Anytime.” He replied.

*****

Rick relaxed back into the swing chair on the porch of the house. He had been awake almost the entire night thinking about the plan to move the herd. On this lap, he held a map and a notepad in which he had scribbled down ideas and read over and over then a thousand times, trying to find some way in which he could stop things if they went wrong.

He had been waiting for Daryl for most of the morning while the sun had been up. He had searched the house, walked the perimeter fence and asked at the gate and no one had seen him. He hadn’t worried too much, Daryl was a lone wolf who would turn up when he was good and ready. He knew that Carol had told him about the meeting so Rick was sure he would show, he just wondered where the hell he could be.

When he finally turned up, it was around 30 minutes later and he had just appeared at the side of the house, rounding the front porch and aiming for the steps. Rick raised both eyebrows and kept quiet while Daryl stepped up onto the porch and sat next to him on the swing chair.

“Where have you been? I’ve been looking everywhere for you.” Rick probed.

“Around.” Daryl mumbled, as he pulled it a cigarette and lit it. Breakfast.

“Around?” Rick questioned, making a face that Daryl knew meant he wasn’t going to leave it there.

“I was with Lexie.” He mumbled under his breath.

Rick dipped his head as his eyes grew wide. “All night?! What’s going on, Daryl?”

“Nothin’ like that. She had a fight with Mel. I stayed with her.” He explained as noncommittally as possible but his vision kept swinging around to Rick’s confused face. “C’mon, man. Stop lookin’ at me like that”

“You must like her to have stayed all night.” Rick said in disbelief, a small laugh escaping his lungs.

“It ain’t how it looks.” Daryl confirmed.  

“Then how is it?” Rick asked as he shifted in his seat and adjusted his blue shirt. 

“We’re friends. I think.”

“You think?”

“I dunno! Quit askin questions! We doin’ this meetin’ or not?!” Daryl retorted, his temper flaring at being quizzed about something he had little desire to explain.

“Yeah, sure.” Rick grinned, standing up and passing him. He stopped at the steps and beamed at him “C’mon, Casanova.”

“Hey, fuck you” Daryl smirked as he got to his feet and followed on.

 

Near enough the whole town had attended the meeting, or a least a representative of each household and family. Mel sat with Eric on the far side of the room, as far away from Lexie as she could get, who was cross legged on the chesterfield couch. They had left the house at different times and ensured their paths did not cross at all. Daryl was sat on the windowsill, caring little for the marks his dirty boots were making on the pristine, white wall he rested them on. Carol, who was stood beside him, side eyed him and flicked her head up, motioning to the black marks under the soles of his boots. He merely shrugged and Lexie stifled a laugh.

As Rick explained the plan to the entire room, Daryl caught Lexie’s eye numerous times and she battled with the urge not to grin from ear to ear. He was managing to remain his usual, stoic and hard to read self, but she knew he wasn’t looking at anyone else in the room but her in the same way. Aaron was right, she was noticing it now, the way he looked at her. The fluttering in her stomach and the glint in her eye were too strong to argue with. She liked it.

“Alright. So, Daryl is going to lead the herd on his bike, from here…” Rick announced, pointing to the large map that had been pinned to the wall. “…to here. Lexie, can you drive?”

Lexie’s skin tingled with fear as every eye in the room turned on her. Now it wasn’t just Daryl.

“Y-yes. I can drive.” She replied.

“Good, you’ll follow alongside Daryl in a car. This is a two-person job. You’ll keep them moving while Daryl rounds up any stragglers.”

Lexie nodded quickly, hoping a prompt response would mean everyone would look away from her quicker. She hazarded a glimpse of Mel, who was busy examining her nails.

“Everyone else” Rick continued “You will all be spread out at different points along the route to watch over corners and keep barriers strong. You will all need to know how to fight, so in the next 24 hours, myself, Glenn, Abraham, Sasha, Rosita, Michonne and Carol will all be teaching you basic skills. Daryl, you’re to head out to the quarry this afternoon, take Lexie with you so she can see what we’re dealing with here and keep an eye on those trucks, they could move at any time and we’ll need to know if they start to shift.”

“No problem” Daryl muttered.

Lexie wondered if it was coincidence that she’d been asked to tag along with Daryl. Deanna had made no secret of Lexie’s gun skills in conversations with the newer members of the community and she figured this may be the reason why she was chosen. Either way, she got to spent more time with Daryl and that both excited and terrified her.  

When everyone began to filter out, Lexie weaved through the crowd outside the house and followed after Rick, who was strutting along the street towards the other side of town.

“Rick” Lexie said from behind him. He stopped instantly and turned to face her.

“Why me?” She asked.

“I’m sorry?” He answered, hooking a thumb over his belt at the side and shifting his weight onto one leg.

“Why did you request me for this?” She questioned with an uncomfortable degree of anxiety.

He flashed her a knowing look. "Daryl says you're capable enough, got the smarts not to mess it up and he works well with you. Believe me, that's a compliment coming from him. He requested you, not me. Now, excuse me, I have training to do.' He gestured over his shoulder with his thumb before turning and continuing his journey.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to those that took the time to leave such nice comments on the last chapter. So happy that people are enjoying this :)  
> I should add a reminder that this isn't canon compliant, therefore the timescale of the group being at Alexandria has been massively modified. This is a Daryl fic so isn't really about anything that happens in the show at this point. But you all started reading it for that reason I guess...So, I'll just go!

Eric and Aaron heard the shouting which had ensued some time after Lexie had vanished into the house the previous night. Aaron figured from the ferocity of Mel’s rage that many more people had heard it too. He had asked how Mel was doing when she’d followed them home from the meeting in a bad mood and proceeded to sit in their living room and drink half a bottle of wine. At first, she had proclaimed that she was fine, she explained that no one knew that Daryl had rejected her so staring and gossip had been kept to a minimum. But she had spent the night with Spencer which both Aaron and Eric had voiced their disapproval of, telling her she was only wasting her time and that she may as well concentrate on her role on the community. Eric had suggested she step out onto the porch to get some fresh air in the hope it would sober her up a bit. Aaron followed her outside. As soon as she looked over at the street Mel’s body tensed and she grit her teeth at the sight of Lexie and Daryl ambling along towards the house. He was looking at her with the same unassuming and slight smile as he was when she’d seen them the night before. Envy welled in her chest.

 

Daryl had caught up with Lexie after she had left Rick and invited himself to walk with her to her house. During the short journey neither of them had spoken and Daryl shoved his hands in his pockets when they reached the path to the house and looked at her through the front of his hair.

“You OK? After last night?” He asked.

“Yeah, thanks to you.” She mumbled, her eyes scanning the sidewalk below them and the shadows cast by the morning sun.

“I didn’t do nothin’.” He shrugged.

“I’m an ugly crier. You didn’t run away at that horrendous sight.” She chortled, allowing herself a quick look at his face. He was glaring right at her, a certain seriousness in his eyes.

“Ya aint ugly.” He stated.

Lexie wasn’t sure if it was a compliment or not. Either way, she hadn’t the first clue how to react, so opted to ignore the statement altogether.

_He doesn’t think I’m ugly, that’s a start._

“Seriously, you stayed with me all night. You were there for me. That means a lot to me.” She said sincerely, feeling shyness creep into her mind and tickle at her nerves.

“I wanted to. Ya ever need me, just let me know” He told her.

She wasn’t sure if she would ever do that, but to have him make the offer was something quite new altogether for her. She had always looked out for herself, been independent and as solitary as possible with two over-interested parents and a sister that demanded to know every detail of her life. Even so, she was finding it hard to stay away from him.

His eyes shifted to her right and he spotted Mel and Aaron over Lexie’s shoulder. Mel’s body language was defensive and closed, while Aaron tried to lean around her while he talked at her, trying to get her to listen to him.

“She apologised yet?” Daryl pressed.

“No. I might have to wait a while for that.” She smiled thinly.

“Hmm” He hummed, unimpressed.

 

“There is so something going on between them.” Mel growled as Aaron was in mid-sentence next to her. She hadn’t been listening to a word he was saying and he’d realised after a few seconds, but persevered nonetheless.

“What makes you say that?” He questioned.

Mel scoffed loudly and pulled her crossed arms tighter around her chest.

“Well, I’m not blind for a start. I’ve never seen Lexie give anyone that much time except you and you bat for the other team. I was almost convinced she was completely asexual for a while. But now… I mean, look at them! He can’t stop staring her and she’s smiling like a love- sick teenager!” She complained.

Aaron was sure he even saw her stamp her foot like a toddler having a tantrum. He ignored it, struggling to focus on what she had said instead of her childish display of jealousy.

“That bother you?” He probed.

“Well, Yeah. It’s like an unwritten rule. You don’t go after the guy your sister likes!” Mel exclaimed.  

Aaron, who was known for his patience, diplomacy and logic, was now visibly annoyed and took hold of her arm, forcing her to face him.

“Mel, I’m going to be honest with you here. You and I both know that Lexie isn’t the ‘going after someone’ type. If there is something between them then I highly doubt it’s intentional and you cannot stand there and tell me you’d let her pass up the chance to be happy. She kept you alive, for months. She is your sister.”

She sighed and looked at the floor. Aaron backed up, recognising that she had finally taken in what he had said.

“I’m sorry, Mel. You know I love you. But someone needed to say it.” He soothed.

 

 

Daryl waited for Lexie to enter the house. As soon as the front door closed, he was off, stalking across the grass and aiming for Aaron and Eric’s place.  

“Hey!” He shouted at Mel.

She froze at the sight of him barrelling towards her. His eyes fixed on her and his legs carrying him as fast as he could without breaking into a run. When he reached the porch, Mel was clinging to the wooden post, bracing herself for the worst. She wasn’t sure what she’d done, but she was almost sure it was to do with her shouting at Lexie. She backed up against the wall of Aaron’s house as Daryl took the steps and stopped, right in front of her face. Aaron positioned himself at Mel’s side, his hand hovering between the front of Daryl leather vest and the zipper of Mel’s pink, hooded jacket. Aaron trusted Daryl enough to have led him and the group to Alexandria, but he wasn’t sure he trusted him enough to leave him alone with Mel right now.

“You owe Lexie an apology.” Daryl hissed.

“Um, w-what for?” She stuttered.

“Quit playin’ dumb! Last night. I heard it. The whole thing!” He yelled, his arm flailing in the air as he spoke.

“Oh, Daryl I-“ She tried, not getting very far before he shot her down.

“-Shut up and listen. I’m’ma make this real simple for ya.” He sneered.

“Daryl-“ Aaron tried to cut in

“Back off.” Daryl snapped at him.

Aaron did as he was told but didn’t move far enough away that he couldn’t step in if things got ugly. Lexie was his best friend, but so was Mel and he wasn’t going to stand by and see her put in harms way.

“I don’t know how else to say it; I ain’t interested in you.” Seethed Daryl.

“I know, I-“

“Really? Because I heard ya hollerin’ at Lexie, accusing her. Y’know what, Mel? You don’t know shit about what’s going on between me and her. It ain’t none of your damn business!”

Mel stayed quiet, her lips firmly pushed together. Daryl tore himself away from her and stomped back and forth on the spot. His chest rose and fell rapidly and sweat had begun to bead on his forehead. His anger was increasing and he knew he would have to walk away in the next few seconds. He stepped back in front of her again, jabbing his index finger at her chest but never making any actual contact.

“I ever catch ya talkin’ shit to her like that again, I'll dump ya outside those walls myself, see how long ya last without her.” He raged.

“OK, that’s enough. Daryl, you should leave.” Aaron intercepted.

“I’m done anyways.” He raged, whirling around and jumping down the steps.

 *****

Later that Day, Daryl had driven Lexie out to the quarry. He parked the bike at the top of the vast, sloped road that led down to it and walked to the verge of the sheer drop before sitting down, his legs dangling from the edge. Lexie stood beside him with her rifle clutched in her hands, her mouth was wide open, her eyes pinned on the heaving mass of corpses below. She was speechless, it was much worse than she’d imagined. There had to be well over six thousand and for a moment she started to re-think her decision to agree to help lead them out. Then she remembered, Daryl had requested her. He must have had some faith in her to keep a level head and so she wasn’t about to make him regret his choice. She sat down beside him, close enough for her arm, which was covered to the elbow by a dark grey, off the shoulder, cotton top, to connect lightly with his. She sighed loudly and began swinging her feet back and forth. The smell that was emanating from the quarry was nauseating and she wrinkled her nose. It seemed to hit her in waves, as if the breeze carried it directly to her nostrils every two minutes or so.

“You up for this?” He questioned, gesturing to the herd with his hand.

“It stinks and I might die…. sure I am.” She said breezily.

“It’ll be alright. I’ll start ‘em off, bring ‘em all up here to the top, then we both lead ‘em to the road.” He clarified.

“You make it sound like a piece of cake” She grinned “When we’re really going to be taking thousands of hungry, reanimated corpses for a walk. I’m kind of excited. That’s sick, right?”

“Yep.” He replied.

Lexie stared at him, his face remained stoic but only until he couldn’t hold back a smirk any longer. She leaned closer to him, nudging his shoulder with hers.

“Jerk” She giggled. “Don’t make me shoot you. You know I won’t miss.”

“Only with a rifle. Can’t shoot shit with a crossbow.” He challenged.

“Bold of you to assume I haven’t ever used a crossbow.” She retorted, raising an eyebrow at him.

Her hair blew in the breeze and her eyes were bright, her lightly freckled skin was otherwise flawless and for a moment, Daryl had completely forgotten about the Walker filled quarry. They were just two people sat on a ledge, teasing one another.

“Have you?” He asked.

“Yes. I think guns are better” She replied dismissively.

“Probably ‘cause it takes less skill.” He boasted.

“Oh! Oh, really?!” She laughed “I could shoot a rat between the eyes at 500 yards and you’re talking to me about skill?! I got skills! I’m a badass!”

Daryl couldn’t help but huff in amusement, his mouth quirking into a smile. Now she was revealing more of her personality and sense of humour, he found himself even more drawn to her. Not many people were able to make him laugh, to do so was considered quite an achievement by everyone else in his group. But Lexie managed it just fine, especially now she was getting more and more used to being in his presence.

“I’m kidding, I know ya got skills.” He smiled.

She bashfully moved her gaze back to the Walkers below, her stomach fluttered and her veins coursed with excitement. She didn’t know what to call it, what was happening between them. But she liked it. It felt silly and fragile and thrilling.

“You mind If I ask you about your family?” She tried, knowing she may not get the response she was rooting for but giving in to her curiosity.

“What ya wanna know?” He mumbled as he lit a smoke and exhaled slowly.

“What were your parents like?”

“Drunks. Both of em. Died way before the turn.” He stated plainly, as if they held little emotional connection to him. Lexie wondered if they ever did, judging from his tone of voice. Having a biological mother who was also an alcoholic, Lexie was strangely relieved to have found someone that knew what it felt like.

“You said you had a brother before.” She mentioned.

“Yeah. Merle. He was kind of an asshole. But he was still my big brother, y’know?”

“Yeah, I understand that.” She said, glancing to her side at him. He was taking long drags on his cigarette and exhaling the smoke in the opposite direction, so as not to cloud her with it. Quite the opposite to when she had witnessed him blow smoke directly into Mel’s face on his front porch. She also had a sibling that was problematic and not always the most likeable of people, but she still loved her. She assumed Daryl felt the same about Merle.

“Did Merle look out for you?" She queried, wondering if she was asking a little too much. But he cleared his throat, shifted slightly in his spot and looked at her.

“Sometimes. I knew the owner of the dive bar my folks were always in. She did me some favours. Gave me a ride home from jail, a place to stay when the ol’ man was on a bender. Took her for granted at the time. Mostly, I just looked out for myself.”

“You did a good job.” She told him. “Mel, she can be an asshole too. She thinks she looked out for me but it was more the other way around.”

“Yeah, that was Merle.” He agreed.

Lexie looked up to the sky as quiet fell around them, only the noise of the Walkers in the quarry floated in the air and the odd chirp of a rare, passing bird. Not continuing with a conversation for the sake of it, they sat side by side in the sun, comfortably lingering in each other’s company. A few minutes turned into fifteen and Lexie leaned back on her hands, he caught a brief glimpse of her but soon found himself thinking back to when he would sit by the lake in his hometown, with the best company he could have asked for at the time.

Gradually, his thoughts moved back to the present and he began to fret.

“Lex, I gotta tell ya somethin’.” He mumbled.

“What?” She answered straight away, sitting back up and staring at him.

“I yelled at Mel.”

“You did what?!” She demanded

“Lost my temper. She can’t talk to ya the way she did. It ain’t right.” He reasoned, smoke escaping from his nose.  

She could have been angry at him, she could have requested that he stay out of her quarrels with her sister. But something in her told her that Daryl had lost his temper with Mel for one, very good reason. He had defended her because he cared about her.

“Did Merle ever say horrible things to you?” She asked.

“Yeah”

“How often?”

“Everyday. Hell, every hour.”

“Then you know it’s just siblings fighting.” She explained.

Daryl did know that, but his temper had run away with him when he’d heard the things Mel had called her. He had been taken aback by how much it had bothered him and had made the informed decision that night to head up to the roof to seek Lexie out, instead of knocking on the front door and shouting in Mel’s face.

“The whole damn street heard, Lexie” He argued.

“It doesn’t matter. What did you say to her?” She wanted to know. She shuffled sideways, bringing one leg over the edge and bending it at the knee, able to face him properly now.

“That I ain’t interested in her n’ whatever is goin on… between you and me, she should mind her damn business.” He uttered.

Lexie’s eyebrows shot up and she gave him a startled look.

“Um, is-is there something going on between us?” She said before she had even had time to consider the ramifications of her question.

He shrugged, took a drag on his smoke and resumed nibbling his lip.

“I dunno, you tell me.” He eventually mumbled under his breath.

“I-I don’t know either. I thought we were friends.” She stammered.

“We are”

“OK then. So, that’s it.”

“Yeah, that’s it n’ it ain’t nothin to do with her. I don’t like her talking to you like that.”  He informed her as he flicked the cigarette end out to the quarry. The small, white end filtered down slowly and vanished into the throng of Walkers.

It was almost in slow motion that Lexie placed a hand on Daryl’s forearm. His eyes fell to her fingers as they delicately lay on his skin which was tingling fiercely at the contact. It was completely out of character and way beyond the remit of what she was used to. Lexie didn’t do physical contact unless it was the occasional sisterly affection with Mel. Even then, she had to distance herself after a while for fear of feeling suffocated. She didn’t know why she had committed to such a gesture, but once her hand was there, she wasn’t about to take it away anytime soon. The taut muscles beneath her fingers rippled as his body tensed and all over again, she was reminded of how attractive he was.

“Daryl, I appreciate you standing up for me. But you really don’t need to. I’ve known Mel a long time and I know how to deal with her. Right now, she will be in absolute turmoil because I’ve not tried to talk to her and that’s punishment enough. She can’t stand it when I act like she’s not there because she knows that she’s the only person I’m close to. She is a complete bitch sometimes, but she loves me. She will come to me with her tail between her legs, she always does.” She clarified. 

Her hand had now completely relaxed over his arm and she was faced with the internal war of whether or not to remove it now she had said her piece. Her eyes searched his as she tried to make a choice. Realising she was taking too long, she quickly withdrew her hand. Daryl’s eyes moved down to his arm and then back up to her face.

“M’sorry.” He whispered.

“It’s OK.” She soothed “Did anyone else see this?”

“Aaron. Think he thought I was gonna hurt her or somethin’. I wouldn’t do that to her, or you” He assured her.

“Daryl, I know that” She affirmed.   

“Ya mad at me?” He gingerly asked.

“No, I’m not mad at you. I just think you’re a hot-headed jerk” she smirked at him, giggling softly.

“Maybe you’re just a pushover” He shot back.

She realised an eyebrow at him “You heard what I said to her that night, right? Definitely not a pushover!”

“Alright, you can have that.” He agreed.

 *****

Upon their return to Alexandria, the inside of the gate was heaving with trucks and people packing supplies to be taken out along the route the Walkers would take when they were led far enough away from the town to be left wandering on their own. Daryl had broken away from her and headed over to Glenn, who was struggling with packing some large, metal sheets onto a truck.

Lexie had noticed Aaron and Eric throwing wooden planks into another vehicle. She held a hand up in a feeble wave to a few others that had called out a greeting to her. She didn’t know them personally, rather she remembered then from checking out guns in the armoury. She recognised a woman that had delivered a vegetable lasagne on Lexie and Mel’s first night in the town and neither of them had wanted to risk trying it in case it was poisoned, no matter how delicious it smelled. She seemed to be known by everyone but gave little back in return. Just the odd wave, a slight nod or a brief smile but never any conversation and definitely no small talk.  

“Hi” She squeaked as she stopped between Aaron and Eric.

Eric dropped a piece of wood into the truck and stared at her. She knew what he was thinking.  

“He told me.” She confirmed.

“Ah…” he said, breathing a sigh of relief.

“She OK?” Lexie asked. Despite everything, she still loved Mel and couldn’t stand the thought of her being upset, even if she was still angry. Aaron approached her and placed a gloved hand on her shoulder until he remembered she hated being touched and quickly drew it away.

“I don’t know” Aaron shrugged “She’s been in the Pantry all day. She hardly said a word when she left our place.” He took hold of her arm and steered her away from everyone else, motioning with his head for Eric to follow them. Daryl glanced over his shoulder to see Aaron and Eric whispering to her.

“He was pretty mad, Lex. It’s not the action of someone who only likes you as a friend. I don’t know if he told you this but he warned her that if he ever heard her talk to you like that again, he’d drop her off outside the walls and leave her there.” Aaron told her.

Lexie’s mouth hung open “woah.”

“Yeah” Eric said “You think he’d actually do that?!”

“No” She answered. She didn’t even need to think about it. “I don’t think he’s as brutal as he sounds.”

“She’s right. That, and he wouldn’t risk losing Lexie.” Aaron added, turning to face her and levelling his eyes with hers.  “When are you two going to sit down and talk this thing out? You both like each other, this is the apocalypse, life is shorter now than it ever was before. I really think that Mel will come around, especially now she’s been put in her place by Daryl….and by me.”

“You?”

“I gave her a gentle reminder that she’s your sister and after everything you’ve done for her, you deserve to be happy.” He justified.

“Oh god, she’s going to feel like everyone’s against her.” Lexie sighed, rubbing a palm over her face and fiddling with the strap on her thigh holster with the other hand.

“We’re not. We just don’t agree with her. Anyway, you’re avoiding questions again.” Aaron prodded, a smile emerging on his face. He exchanged a glance with Eric who was now also smiling. It occurred to Lexie that Eric wasn’t necessarily on Mel’s side. He wasn’t on anyone’s side.

“I don’t know if I want to. I just want to let fate take care of this one.” She nodded.

Eric and Aaron fell silent when Daryl appeared behind her. She hadn’t seen him but could tell from their expressions that she should say no more or she would end up in a very awkward and difficult to explain situation.

“Need a hand?” Daryl asked them.

“Yeah, that’d be great, thanks!” Eric chirped, turning around and beckoning for Daryl to follow him.

“I’m heading home.” Lexie announced.

“Spaghetti night is off I take it?” Aaron asked.

“Probably not the best idea at the moment.” She called back, her hands raised either side of her in an exaggerated shrug.

“Yeah, you’re right. I’ll stop by later on with a bottle?” He suggested.

“OK” she smiled as she turned to walk away.

“Lexie” Daryl called out, quickly scuffing across the sidewalk to stand right in front of her, he looked down at her and chewed his bottom lip, starkly aware that everyone around the gate was now watching him with interest as they worked. He turned his back to them all.

“Can I see ya later?” He requested, his voice low and quiet but Aaron just about caught it.

“Um…” Lexie craned her neck to look at her friend behind him.

“Another time” Aaron mouthed at her, shooting her a wink.

“Sure.” She smiled up at Daryl. Her insides felt like they were vibrating with nerves. He was close enough to her to kiss her but she knew that he wouldn’t. For a fleeting moment, she allowed herself to imagine what it might be like before she quickly shoved the thought away. She didn’t want to expect anything, or she would end up disappointed.

 *****

Lexie went straight to her room, bypassing Mel and not even looking at her as she sat on the couch. She slammed the door and climbed onto her bed, unlacing and kicking off her boots. Poe appeared at the window and offered a small chirp which caused Lexie to giggle as he jumped elegantly from the ledge and into her room. He joined her on the bed and rubbed his silky fur against her arm, coming back for more over and over until she shuffled backwards and lay back on the cushioned headboard. Poe curled up beside her and she slid her sketchbook from the nightstand and opened it up.

 

A light knock on the door roused her from sleep around an hour later and she blinked rapidly, rubbing her eyes and wondering when she’d nodded off. Her sketchpad lay open on the covers in front of Poe, who was still sleeping. Dragging herself further up into a sitting position she sucked in a deep breath and mentally prepared herself. She knew it was Mel and that it could either be round two or an apology.

“Come in.” She called out.

Mel slowly opened the door and stepped apprehensively into the room as if her sister were a lion ready to pounce. She gingerly leaned back on the dresser and looked down at Lexie who had resumed her sketching but had now briefly paused, her pencil hovering over the page, motionless.

“Daryl has feelings for you.” Mel said abruptly. “Y’know how I know? Because he came charging at me like an overprotective boyfriend this morning. Told me he’d leave me outside the walls if I ever spoke to you badly again.”

“I know.” Lexie sighed.

“You know? You know what?” She asked

“All of it. He told me.”

Mel nodded as if she wasn’t all that surprised. She straightened up and began gradually pacing about the room in her pink, denim skirt and white tank top. She looked over the dark walls and stopped to pick up a CD from the shelf. She examined it and tilted her head to the side before placing it back where she found it. Her toes sank into the thick pile of the carpet as she walked.

“I need to tell you I’m sorry.” She blurted out, almost choking on the words.

“This is going to be good” Lexie muttered to herself.

“I didn’t mean those things I said to you. I was just angry.”

“Yes you did.” Lexie replied “they’re the same things you always say to me when you’re mad. I don’t care, you can think what you like.”

“Lex, I really don’t think those things. I’m sorry.” She pleaded, her voice now changing to a more serious tone and Lexie knew at this point that she was actually trying. She looked up to see that Mel was struggling to hide how visibly upset she was. Her eyes were shiny with tears.

“I’m sorry too. I was harsh with you.” She offered.

“No. I deserved it. I just flipped. It’s horrible being told by somebody you have a major crush on that they just don’t like you. Then I saw you guys, the way he looks at you. It’s really fucking cute, Lex. I just got so jealous.”

Lexie didn’t answer, choosing to continue with her sketching instead while Mel stared at the floor, her mind mulling over everything that had happened since Daryl had arrived at Alexandria. She had managed to form some hint of a friendship with him, they talked easily and guard shifts were enjoyable. If only she’d left it at that instead of trying to push it into something it wasn’t. She had come across as immature and unintelligent and, in the process, had embarrassed herself and upset Lexie. But it was never her intention.

 “He really likes you, Lex. I don’t think he knows it himself yet, but he wouldn’t have yelled at me like that if he didn’t.” She said, cutting through the quiet.

“It’s doesn’t matter.” Lexie dismissed. Flipping her sketchbook closed and thudding her pencil down on top of it. Mel Stepped forwards and lowered herself onto the edge of the bed, turning to face her sister.

“Yes it does. Because if you like him too, you should tell him.” She urged.

“I’m not going to do that.” Lexie spat, a small laugh escaping her at the ridiculousness of the idea.

“Why?” Mel pressed.  

“Because you like him and I’m not a relationship person. Im not an… anything person. I’m better on my own.” She explained.

Mel pursed her lips and sighed, her hand creeping over to take hold of Lexie’s wrist.   

“Listen to me. You were right, he’s a good guy and he is too good for me. I do like him, but it’s not me he wants, it’s you. Maybe it’s time to give it a chance. See what happens.” She proposed.

“I never wanted anything to come out of this.” Lexie assured her with serious eyes.

She hadn’t. She hadn’t intended to get so close to Daryl. The lure of his quiet nature and mutual appreciation for solitude proving too interesting for her to resist. At some point during their developing friendship she had realised that what she thought of him was far greater than she had ever anticipated. It was, in fact, far greater than she had ever experienced for anyone else in her life. For the first time, she found herself laden with feelings for someone instead of feeling nothing but indifference. But Daryl was different. He was unlike any man she’d ever met and in the time he’d been there, she had found herself sinking deeper and deeper into a complicated and unfamiliar territory.

“But it has.” Mel smiled.

“Why are you encouraging this?” Lexie asked.

Mel climbed past her on the bed, taking up the spot that Lexie had previously fallen asleep in. Poe awoke with a start and shot out a paw, swiping at Mel’s leg. She waved him off and he quickly left the bed and went to sit in the window instead. Mel sighed and leaned back against the headboard.

“It’s time for me to leave well alone. If I’d known you would ever have felt anything for him I never would have tried. I hope you know that.” She said, her mouth still quirked into a smile. 

“You never give up, Mel.” Lexie told her, almost disbelieving her.

“You’ve never liked anybody before. My god have guys tried with you. But you just never seemed to care. I’m not like you, I guess I like to prove to myself that I can get what I want…” She paused for a second, her eyes connecting with Lexie’s. “…That I am good enough.”

It dawned on Lexie there and then that they both had self-esteem issues that just played out in different ways. It was the reason they clashed so badly and struggled to understand why they lived so differently.

“You are good enough” Lexie reassured her “But not when you act like a spoiled brat.”

Mel giggled and nodded. She held out her hand and Lexie took hold of it, letting her pull her closer. She settled on her side next to Mel, the warmth on the sheets from Poe’s sleeping body still present under her ribs. 

“Are you happy? When you’re with Daryl?” Mel questioned with some trepidation. She had never had to ask such questions to Lexie before and wasn’t sure of what response to expect.

“I like being with him. I can be me. He makes me laugh.” Lexie confessed.

“And he’s hot, right?” Mel chirped as she looked down at her an expression of glee on her face which was a huge contrast to a few seconds previously.

Lexie rolled her eyes and laughed at her sisters shallow comment.

“ _Right_?!” Mel prodded.

“OK, OK. Yeah, he’s pretty hot and he doesn’t even know it which makes it even worse.” She admitted.

“Then tell him.”

“I can’t”

“Oh come on! Why not?!”

“Because we’re friends!” Lexie groaned.

“Friends schmends, Lexie!” Mel announced.

“Oh my god. Shut up.” Lexie complained. “It’s just not me, Mel. Just let me handle this myself. If it happens, it’s happens and I’ll need to take it slow anyway. You know I don’t know the first thing about being in a relationship.”

“God. Boring. But OK. Am I forgiven?” Mel wanted to know.

“Yes. Am I?” Lexie said.

“Sure” Mel shrugged before jumping from the bed and walking to the door.

“I’m not a virgin, by the way.” Lexie mentioned. Stopping her sister in her tracks. _Since I’m being forced to confess things._ She thought.

Mel approached the bed again, curling her hands around the wooden frame at the end and leaning over it, an eager and stunned look in her eyes.

“Remember Tyler from high school?” Lexie mumbled.

Mel gasped. “Strangely attractive, loner, got thrown in juvvy for arson- Tyler?!”

Lexie nodded, a pained expression on her face.

“When?!”

“When he was released. I ran into him in the park one day. We went out a couple times. He took me to his place. I figured I may as well just get it over with.”

“He was your _first?!_ Jesus, Lex!” Mel cried in disbelief.  

Lexie had never pinned much hope on being in love when she lost her virginity. She knew from an early age that she didn’t much like people and finding a boyfriend was going to be nigh on impossible. Growing up watching Mel jump from boy to boy and claiming that she was in love with them all had somehow worn her perception of true love a little thin. She didn’t really believe in it and ended up seeing her first time as more of a means to an end. She had chosen a boy who was considered to be reasonably infamous at their school, but for all the wrong reasons. He was seen as an outcast, unapproachable and volatile yet the popular girls always mentioned his smouldering good looks and how it was a shame he was such a psycho.

Lexie had planned it all along. She was in the right place at the right time having heard he had been released from juvenile detention and had worked on him from that moment. But she had been surprised at how little work she had to put in after all due to him seeming to genuinely like her. The experience its self wasn’t as terrible as most first-time stories. He had been considerate, respectful and kind and she had left feeling triumphant and smug. What she didn’t expect, was for him to call her the next day explaining that he felt something for her and wanted to see her again. She had politely declined. She wasn’t a relationship person, even back then.

“Mmhmm. Then there was Stevie at college.” She shrugged.

“Stevie dropped out to join a biker gang.” Mel stated.

“Uh Huh.”

Stevie had spotted Lexie in a bar at an open mic night. She sat alone at a table with a bottle of tequila and a shot glass in front of her. He had introduced himself and sat down opposite her which had filled her with rage. But as the night went on, she had softened towards him and even let him walk her home. Months passed and Stevie was never more than a stone’s throw away, admiring her and asking her over and over if she would just let him take her out on a date. Eventually, he showed up at her dorm room after a party she had declined to attend and for a reason she still was none the wiser about, she had grabbed his leather jacket and yanked him inside. Before he could even speak, she had shoved him against the door and rammed her hands down his pants. Her second time had been even better, but there wasn’t an ounce of emotion in it for her. In the morning, she refused to acknowledge what had happened and went on as if nothing had changed. Stevie, having had enough of her mixed signals, had finally given up and left college to join a biker gang.

“Wow, you like ‘em dangerous, huh?” Mel quipped.

“Very funny.” Lexie aid sarcastically. “Now you finally know what you’ve been wondering for years, you can fuck off. Close the door on your way out and clean up your shit in the living room.”

 

After Lexie and Mel had cooked and eaten dinner, they watched a movie in the living room and Lexie had decided to head up to her room again, needing some peace from Mel’s incessant chattering and moaning that her and Daryl should just kiss. It wasn’t that easy for Lexie or Daryl. She knew they were both complicated and deep individuals with all manner of ingrained issues from the past and reasons not to just throw away the precious friendship they had created and both needed at that moment in time.

Darkness had crept in and Lexie lit the many candles that decorated her room on almost every flat surface. A yellow glow illuminated the room and she sat back on the bed and reached to her nightstand. She pulled open the draw and collected a small notebook and a pen and began to scribble in black italic handwriting the thoughts that were passing through her head. She had never kept an actual journal, preferring the use of notebooks that held random scribblings, small drawings and verses of poetry that would sometimes creep into her mind. Once it was all out and on paper, she usually felt like she’d vented and dispelled everything that was causing her anxiety. Only to find something else as soon as the notebooks cover was closed.

  

Mel stretched out on the couch, singing softly to the song that played as the credits rolled up the screen at the end of the movie. She lifted a foot in the air, spreading her pink polished toenails and thanked her lucky stars she was in Alexandria and not out in the woods anymore. Here, she could look after herself and feel human again instead of feeling like a walking snack for a hungry dead person.

A loud knock at the door startled her and she got to her feet, brushing her bright blonde hair back from her face with her hand as she walked. She yawned as she reached the door and grabbed the handle.

Daryl stood on the porch, side on with his head low. Mel just huffed and stepped aside, allowing him in. He thudded across the threshold in his heavy boots and waited for her to close the door before speaking.

“Sorry about this mornin’.” He muttered.

“No, you were right.” She said, a hint of a smile flashing across her lips.  

“Still, shouldn’t have yelled at ya. Sorry if I scared ya.” He apologised.

“It’s fine. We’re cool. I won’t cause any more trouble.” She promised.

Daryl nodded and glanced around at his surroundings. The kitchen and living room were both empty. “Lexie here?” he enquired.

“Yeah she’s in her room. You can go on up if you want.” She offered.

“Thanks.” He grumbled.

He turned and headed up the stairs. Mel watched him from the hall, still able to appreciate his broad shoulders and strong back. _You’re a lucky girl, Lex._

“Daryl” She said.

He stopped half way and glanced over his shoulder.  

“Last time I saw a man get that mad over someone talking to a girl like shit, it was my father. He threw a guy through a window because he called my mother a ‘bitch’. My dad loved my mom more than he loved life itself”

He didn’t say anything.

“She’s not like other women. That’s a good thing. Take it slow.” She advised.  

“Take what slow?” He questioned, knowing what she was referring to but not wanting to come across as if he did.

“Everything. Door at the end on the left. Make sure you knock first.” She grinned.

He gave her a nod of acknowledgement and carried on up the stairs.


	9. Chapter 9

Lexie huffed at yet another knock at the door. Wishing Mel would just leave her alone. They’d made their peace, spent some time together, now it was dark and Lexie’s favourite time of the day. She could crawl out to her perch and watch the stars in a peaceful bliss. But not now.  

She sprang up from the bed and threw her notebook on the nightstand. Candles flickered and danced as she moved past them. She grumbled in her throat as she reached for the handle and threw the door open.

“What do you want now, you pestilent bitc-oh! Um… Hi.”

Daryl stood on the other side, one arm up on the doorframe, he leaned in with an eyebrow raised. Lexie stood up straight and tried to mask the embarrassment that stung at the inside of her cheeks.

“I-I thought you were Mel. Sorry.” She apologised quickly.

He didn’t say anything back, only staring at her where she was and she found herself doing the same back at him. His blue eyes behind scraggly, unkempt hair. His usual, bare arms in a sleeveless shirt. His bottom lip being nibbled mercilessly as she considered what he might be wanting to say.

“Why didn’t you just use the roof and knock on the window?” She asked, snapping out of her trance.

“Needed to apologise to Mel.” He replied.

“Oh, I bet that was interesting.” She joked.

“Not really. It’s cool. We’re good” He rasped, now leaning all of his weight on the door frame, his face closer to her.

“Um, come in.” She said shyly. He crossed into her room.

He had never seen inside before and Lexie nervously picked at her nails as she closed the door behind him and watched him slowly move around the room, looking at all the posters, framed art, quotes, CD’s books and various other trinkets she had amassed in the time she had lived there.

Daryl stopped when he noticed a photograph of Lexie and Mel from before the turn. They were both smiling, arms around each other, in front of a college sign. Lexie looked exactly how he remembered her. Hearing her clear her throat awkwardly from behind him, his attention shifted to further up the wall.

 “What are all those?” He asked, nudging his head up at the black, scrawled quotes on the walls.

“Just quotes that I like. Most of them from Edgar Allen Poe” she said.

“Ya write em up there?” He questioned. “That’s your handwriting’?”

She nodded, feeling self-conscious. The last time she had let a man into her room was Stevie from college and a part of her wished she’d maybe allowed herself a little more practice at this.

“Looks real good” he said.

“Thanks” she mumbled.

She decided to sit down and stop acting like a spare part. She resumed her previous spot at the top of the bed and drew her legs up, hugging her knees.

Daryl could sense her discomfort, but wasn’t about to leave. He had been looking forward to seeing her and figured the longer he stayed the easier it would become for her. He wasn’t exactly finding the whole thing easy himself, but he did have something to tell her and wanted to choose his moment wisely.

He picked up a stack of books from the side and glanced over the titles, not recognising any of them, he placed them back down and sat on the other end of the bed, facing Lexie.

“Read anything else recently?” He queried.

She wondered why he had chosen this as a topic of conversation, although he had asked her about her reading material more than one and seemed happy to listen to her ramble on about her perception of certain novels and the issues they raised. She had no idea if he actually cared about anything she said, but whenever she paused, he would always encourage her with another question or comment.

“Yes. Deanna let me borrow Franz Kafka’s ‘The Metamorphosis’. Before I read The Collector” She told him.

“What’s it about?”

Daryl’s barrage of questions since he’d arrived was slightly unsettling to her but she decided to simply give him what he wanted in the hope that his curiosity would quell after a while. She didn’t mind talking to him and he was one of only three people she trusted enough to hold a conversation with.

“It’s an unusual one. It tells the story of Gregor Samsa who wakes one morning to find himself transformed into a huge insect and subsequently struggling to adjust to this new condition” She explained.

“What kinda insect?”

“A beetle.”

“It not got any pictures?”

“Um, no. You have to use your imagination.” She laughed.

“You read some weird stuff.” He commented.

“I like strange things. Life would be boring without the strange.” She smiled.

Everything she liked tended to be a little out of the ordinary. She wore dark clothes, read unusual books, listened to music that was before her time, drank far too much coffee and preferred spending time at the gun range to shopping.

“Guess that’s true.” He agreed.

“Kafka was trying to convey so much with this odd, little book though. It’s crazy how you can find something in it that relates to you.”

He gave her a bemused look as he shifted further onto the bed, careful not to drag his dirty boots over the sheets. “Dude turned into a beetle” he scoffed.

“OK, how about ‘I cannot make you understand, I cannot make anyone understand what is happening inside me. I cannot even explain it to myself’.” She narrowed her eyes at him. “Tell me that’s not relatable.”

“It is.” He replied, taking the current situation into account. “Ya like it better than that one?” He asked pointing at ‘The Collector’ on the chest of drawers.

Now she became suspicious and decided to ask a question of her own. “Why are you so interested in my books?”

“I aint” he protested.

“You don’t do ‘making conversation’ and you ask me about what I’m reading all the time.”

“Curious I guess.” He replied, picking at the stitching on his jeans.

“You just don’t read? Never anything at all?” She questioned.

“Stole a dirty magazine from my big brother when I was a kid. Read that.”

Lexie slowly licked her lips in an effort to keep her grin at bay. Now _this_ was amusing.

“Oh…you ‘read’ it, huh?” She jested.

“Front to back, over and over.” He nodded.

“Literary masterpieces with minimal words.” She stated.

“I’m more of a picture book kind of guy.”

She burst into fits of laughter and he fought not to do the same when he saw how funny she found it. They both chuckled quietly and she motioned to his boots.

“Take those off, get comfortable.”

He hesitated for a few seconds, studying her face. For what, Lexie couldn’t decipher. She waited while he unlaced them and slipped them off, moving back onto the bed and bending one leg underneath him.

“Mel apologised to me” She said.

“Good” He answered.  

“She can be a dick, but she’s not a bad person.” Lexie commented.

The truth was, Mel wasn’t as bad as she liked everyone to think she was. She had just never had to endure being torn away from her life and mother and placed in a new home. She had been lucky enough to have everything she wanted provided for her and all she was guilty of was taking advantage. Lexie appreciated everything in her life that little bit more because she knew she almost didn’t have any of it. She was always polite and courteous to her parents and the rest of the family. She minded her manners, said please and thank you and consciously made a massive effort to be around them and spend time with them. She had chosen to stay at a local community college with Mel instead of moving miles away and taking a place at another institution that had offered her a prestigious scholarship that she hadn’t told a soul about.

Even Mel didn’t know about Lexie’s choice to stay with her over embarking on the course of a lifetime that would pave the way for her to have a successful career in art. Lexie was never resentful and had always maintained that her family was the most important thing in her life, therefore all of Mel’s less appealing personality traits were forgiven and her entitled attitude was understood. Despite her faults, Mel had proved herself to a loving, loyal and fiercely protective sister who only wanted the best for Lexie.

As he sat in front of her, she noticed his body had completely stilled. His fingers still pinched the loose thread in his jeans that he had been playing with but his hands were motionless and his eyes were locked on her.  

“Lex” He mumbled.

She noticed he was chewing on his bottom nip nervously.

“Yeah?”

“I gotta tell you something”

 _Oh god. Oh god. Oh god._ Lexie hoped with every fibre of her being that he wasn’t about to confess any feelings for her. Not only would she not know how to respond, it was also highly probable that she would come across as completely weird and freaked out.

“Two things in one day” She sighed.

Gradually, he used his arms to move closer to her on the bed. She thought she must have been gawping at him like an idiot but found it difficult to care.

“The Remington. It’s kinda…Walmart.” He uttered.

Lexie’s eyes widened for a moment while the sentence echoed in her head. She had heard it before. A long time ago. Because she had been the one to say it.

“That’s right, I remembered you. From before. But I don’t think you remembered me.” He expressed.

Finally, able to gather her thoughts, she nodded and offered him a smug and knowing smile.

“You paid with a black Amex.” She whispered.  

She heard a slight huff from him and witnessed his mouth curl into the subtlest of smiles. It was now many months ago, probably over a year, a time that she could barely recall the details of, but she remembered that day like it was yesterday. A pounding on the door of her father’s gun store that was so intense she was sure the glass was going to break. Her father had instructed her and Mel not to let anyone in. Daryl peered through the door at them. Pleaded with them. His hair shorter and lighter in colour, his face much younger, his clothes cleaner than now and she had met his eyes through the dirty glass of the gun stores door and questioned if she had ever seen a more attractive man. Mel had outwardly expressed her own interest in him as Mel usually did and their father had been stirred from his office by the ruckus. Daryl had slapped a black Amex against the glass, which had proved to be the golden ticket to the store. Lexie had found herself almost unable to tear her eyes away from him and when her father had asked her to find him a hunting rifle, something inside her bubbled and burned. It was nerves. She was nervous of this good-looking stranger that had turned up out of nowhere and practically bashed the door down. On her father’s orders, she had fetched him a Remington Sendero SF II and proceeded to point out all the features and benefits of the weapon, finishing up by expressing that her opinion of the make was that it was a little ‘Walmart.’ When he had turned to leave, his angel wing emblazoned, leather vest was the thing that had seared itself into her memory. Now, here he was, that same man that had been the first in her life to ever render her almost speechless…and he remembered her. For weeks, she had tried to push it away, tried to ignore that fact that she could see the old Daryl in him and still thought him to be just as attractive as he had been back then.

“You do remember me” he stated. His voice carried a hint of surprise.  

“Yes. You steal that card?” She grinned.

“Naw. Borrowed it” He responded with self-satisfied smirk “With permission”.

“Whoever let you borrow it was a good sport.” She said.

“Yeah.” He nodded.

“Mel doesn’t remember you. She would have mentioned it if she did. It was your wings that jogged my memory. Then It all came back. I remember looking at you through the door.” She recalled. Part of her wanted to add that she thought he was completely gorgeous and terribly distracting but she decided against it.

“Those guns ya ol’ man sold me, saved my life and the people I was with. A lot of times” Daryl said. Didn’t wanna piss him off. But I did agree with ya, ‘bout the rifle”

She giggled and brought a hand to her face, not wanting him to see her vulnerability.

“Yeah, touchy subject.”

Daryl felt like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. She knew he remembered her and the fact that she remembered him was both flattering and a shock. He had looked through that dirty glass at her pretty face and the air left his lungs at the sight of how similar they looked. Not only that, but she was mysterious and alluring in her own right. He hadn’t been able to stop thinking about that day from the moment he realised it was her when he arrived in Alexandria. 

She had been wanting to tell him for so long that she knew who he was, that she remembered him from before, so his revelation had come as not only a relief but also a kind of shove in the right direction for both of them. Having ran out of conversation, they sat and looked at one another. Daryl’s eyes occasionally lowering to his lap or glancing around the room. It was a rare situation that silence between them was awkward, but this time, Lexie felt her skin begin to crawl and wracked her brain to think of something to stop it.

She wanted to ask if he’d come to her room to tell her that he remembered her from before, or was it for another reason. He wasn’t showing any signs of leaving and if she was honest with herself, she didn’t want him to.

As time passed and they chatted intermittently about the books on the shelves and quotes on the walls. Daryl had started sorting through the CD collection Lexie had. He made an impressed face at more than one of them and she had told him that she had found them in a car on the highway, along with the old-fashioned CD player that stood on the edge of the dresser next to him. She threw it in her truck and brought it back to Alexandria, much to Deanna’s dismay. She was only allowed to keep it if noise levels were kept low.

When Daryl pointed to the photograph of Lexie and Mel and asked when it was taken. She rose from the bed to stand beside him and informed him it was their first day of college and that they are the same age.

“The party we had here wasn’t the only time she dressed me up like a clown. She dragged me to a frat house that night. I’ve never been so terrified.” She giggled.

Daryl remembered the party they’d had and how he’d been reluctant to show his face. Having arrived and seen how amazing Lexie looked, he had instantly changed his mind.

“Told ya, ya didn’t look like no clown. Ya looked amazin’.” He said without even thinking. When the words had left his lips he froze, thinking maybe he’d gone too far. He slowly risked a look at her. She was staring at the wall, both lips curled into her mouth.

“Thank you” She whispered after a few highly uncomfortable seconds had passed. Not only was it a compliment and she had no idea how to take them, it had come from him. Despite this, her stomach hummed with excitement and happiness and she gradually turned to face him, not realising how close to him she actually was. Coming face to face with his chest, she peered up at him and saw the tensing of his jaw as he examined her face with his eyes. She tried to step away, her mind screamed at her to move, but her legs wouldn’t comply and so she stood, gazing at him and listening to the rhythmic sound of him breathing.

Daryl had also grasped that he wasn’t quite able to move away. His body had completely seized up and he could quite easily stay there and stare at her all night. Something invisible was keeping them there, something that both of them felt but Daryl had to put a stop to before things got even more confusing.

“I should go.” He muttered.

“Oh, yeah. It’s late.” She agreed, finally able to step back.  

“Maybe see ya tomorrow.” He suggested, fully intending to make sure he was back from whatever he had to do with enough time to find an excuse to see her. She smiled and nodded and he set about putting his boots back on as she paced back and forth, lost in her own thoughts.

_What am I supposed to do? Do I stop him? Was I meant to kiss him? But he could have kissed me too. But he didn’t. Oh my god. I am so out of my depth here. I actually need Mel’s advice. It’s bad if I need Mel’s advice._

”Uh… night.” He croaked, snapping her from her thought process and backing towards the door.

“Be careful tomorrow. Goodnight.” She said.

When the door closed and she was left all alone in her room, she released a huge sigh and threw herself onto the bed, face down and groaning into the sheets in frustration. Unbeknown to her, Daryl leaned against the other side of the door and dragged a hand over his face, also trying to relieve the gnawing feeling in the pit of his stomach that was urging him to do something about the situation. He could hear Lexie’s strangled growls and smiled to himself at the fact that it sounded like she felt exactly the same.

 *****

The day has passed and Lexie thought it might have been the slowest 12 hours of her life. Daryl had been out all day and the armoury was empty. Guns had been checked out first thing and no one had been back until the early evening when Glenn showed up with everyone’s firearms in a huge box. It had taken a lot of box signing and tidying before she could go home but when it was finally done, she was delighted to see Aaron stood in front of her house with two bottles of red wine hidden in his jacket. Just what she needed.

Aaron poured more dark red alcohol into Lexie’s glass. They were a bottle down already and had been sat in the kitchen for almost two hours. He had updated her on the state of the roads, ready for the great Walker trek and told her how Mel had turned up at their place with a bowl of pasta, potato chips and a terrible romance movie that she was currently forcing Eric to watch. He could tell Lexie’s mind was elsewhere as she traced circles in a small patch of water on the surface of the kitchen island.

Her mind had started to fog after the third glass and now the bottle was almost empty, she was feeling even more spaced out. She hadn’t forgotten that Daryl had said he would maybe see her when he got back. But it was now dark and he still hadn’t showed up. She had welcomed Aaron with open arms in the hope he would provide her with a much-needed distraction in the form of wine and decent conversation. But she had been unable to apply herself to anything and Aaron was beginning to notice.

“You’re not even listening, are you?” He asked, reaching out and tapping the countertop in front of her with his hand.

“Yes.” She lied, realising she was completely clueless about what he had just said.

“Alright, no. I’m not. I’m sorry, I’m really preoccupied and…a little drunk.”

“You’re always drunk on wine night that’s no excuse. What’s going on?”

“Nothing. That’s the thing. I have you and Mel pushing me to do something about this Daryl thing and then he keeps staring at me and standing real close to me and I can tell he wants to do something and he says these really subtle things sometimes but nothing is happening and if it does it could ruin our friendship and I don’t want to ruin our friendship. I’m just so damn confused.” She rambled. Once the floodgate was opened, it was hard to close it and her thoughts tumbled out in one, messy blur of words.

“It is evident now more than ever that you haven’t done this before” Aaron sighed.

“He’s just as bad at it as I am!” She protested.

Aaron laughed and took a sip of his wine. “Apparently so.”

“Look, being single is part of the fabric of my being. I wouldn’t even know what to do with a boyfriend. I mean, am I supposed to feed it? Do I tell it stuff? How honest do I have to be? Will it just go away if I ignore it? How often does it need to be walked?”

With a mouthful of wine, Aaron couldn’t suppress a heave of laughter that rose up from his chest. Wine sprayed from the corners of his mouth as he jumped off the seat and over to the sink, leaning over it and breaking into hysterics.

“You know I have to tell Daryl you said that at some point, right?” He gasped.

“If you do, I’ll push you into the quarry of Walkers.” She threatened, narrowing her gaze at him. He sat back in his seat and slowly rubbed his hands together while leaning on the counter in front of her.

“Seriously, I really think if you just spend a little more time with him, you’ll find it comes up in conversation. Either that or he might just kiss you. It’ll probably take around six years, because let’s face it, he doesn’t strike me as being the ‘throw you against a tree in the moonlight’ type and you’re not exactly going to be the one to make the first move.”  He announced with a tone that led Lexie to believe he found this whole thing highly entertaining because he was merely a bystander that got to watch the drama unfold.

“What makes you think that?” She asked.

He grinned at her before taking a sip of his drink and gently placing the glass down, making a small _clink_ as it hit the surface.

“You asked how often he needs to be walked _and_ if this were Mel, we both know the deal would have been sealed at this point.” He pointed out.

“The deal?”

He shot her a sympathetic look.

“Oh! The _deal_. Right. Oh god… the deal has to be sealed.” She fretted.

Aaron was right, if something were to happen between them, there would no doubt be a point where physical affection would become another hurdle to deal with.

“What, you don’t want to seal the deal?” He questioned with an expression so serious it made her even more nervous about the whole thing.

“Now, wait a minute, I never said I didn’t want to. Although it’s been a while. Like… college… been a while.” She mumbled before clearing her throat and looking away from him. Too ashamed to look him in the eye after confessing something so personal.

“But… you’re 34?!” He cried.

“Yes.” She squeaked.

“Oh, you poor thing.” He chuckled.

“Aaron!” She snapped, her mouth dropping open In shock.

Lexie, who got drunk with Aaron on a weekly basis, had never been as loose lipped before. She considered that her new found need to share information was down to a number of factors including the need for advice and several glasses of extremely old wine from a secret stash outside the walls. Her mind had fogged over and the room was starting to spin and Aaron grinned at her, enjoying every single moment of their intoxicated conversation. He couldn’t wait to get home and tell Eric.

“Mel was right about those arms. They’re just magnificent.” Lexie mused before she finished the drink in the glass.

“OK, here have some more wine. I am liking honest Lexie. I have never seen this side to you before.” He picked up the bottle and slid her glass closer to him. She quickly placed her hand over the top to stop him from topping it up.

“Na-Uh. He told me he might see me tonight. Can you imagine if he turns up and I’m drunk as hell?!”

“Too late for that.” Aaron sniggered.

“Yeah, thanks. Buddy.” She said with a hint of sarcasm.

 

As it happened, Daryl was already there. Sat on the back perch smoking a cigarette, cleaning and waxing the strings of his crossbow and enjoying the peace and quiet after a long day of lugging heavy things around in the blistering heat. Poe sat beside him, grooming his fur and purring loudly. Daryl had briefly tickled his head before leaving him to his own devices. He was more of a dog person anyway.

The last rays from the sun had dipped below the horizon and Alexandria was cloaked in darkness which with it, brought a stinging cold air that licked at the bare skin of his arms. Daryl was used to the opposite extremes, both the cold and the heat due to spending most of his time growing up in the woods hunting and avoiding people. He considered dealing with the weather to be partly mind over matter and if he didn’t focus on it, it rarely bothered him.

He had positioned himself so he was able to see into Lexie’s room should she appear but he had been sat there for almost an hour and there had been no sign of her. The room remained dark and he contemplated going back to his place but didn’t want to leave the serenity of the rooftop escape, especially if there was still a chance he might see her.

 _What are you really doing here?_  He thought. _You aren’t even sure how you feel about her._

But the pull towards her had been too strong for him to ignore and he had thought about her for the entire day. Wondering what she was doing in the armoury while he was working and even what she was reading.

The guard shift passed by below, two women chatting quietly and he moved away from the edge so as not to blow Lexie’s cover and reveal her hiding spot to anyone. Poe began to brush against his elbow and he glanced down at the cat, wondering how it hadn’t been caught and eaten by walkers yet.

A noise from inside Lexie’s room disturbed him and he looked over his shoulder to see her in her room. She was stood in front of a single, lit candle wearing a huge, black T-shirt and nothing else. The hem reached the middle of her thighs. Her hair was down, textured, brown waves reaching to the middle of her shoulder blades. She pressed a button on the stereo and began to sway to whatever music was playing inside. Daryl couldn’t hear it, but he could see her singing. Her head tilted back slightly and her eyes closed. Instead of tapping on the glass and getting her attention, he sat in the darkness outside and watched her for a few moments, not wanting to stay too long and invade her privacy but craving to see if she really was the same when she was alone as she was when she was with him.

She twirled slowly around the room, her bare legs illuminated in the glow of the candle as they carried her around. She lifted her hands and ran all of her fingers through her hair, lifting it up and allowing it to fall bit by bit back across her shoulders. Daryl was mesmerized. He had not seen a more alluring and fascinating sight for a long time. When she flopped down on the bed, her legs bent and her arms resting on the covers above her head, Daryl decided he had been gifted with enough of her for one night and tore himself away from something he could have easily watched all night. He tickled Poe’s head again and descended the ladder.

 *****

In the morning, she awoke with a headache clustered behind her eyes and had made her way to the armoury clutching a coffee in one hand, a bottle of water in the other with her backpack on and a large pair of Mel’s sunglasses that she hoped would make it less obvious that she was so hungover she could vomit at any moment. She had been surprised to find the gate crowded with people, Daryl amongst them. Deanna made her way out of the crowd when she caught sight of Lexie and headed over to her.

“Good morning, Lexie. You look a little out of sorts.” She chirped. Obviously, a lot more astute than Lexie felt. 

“Morning. I’m just tired.” She grumbled.

“Well, you’d better finish up your coffee, we’re ready to move the herd today. Olivia is covering the armoury. We have a truck for you, everyone’s almost ready to go. Here, this is your walkie” She instructed, passing her a large, black device with a long aerial.

Lexie stepped closer to a nearby wall and set her coffee down. She threw the bottle of water into her bag and clipped the Walkie to her belt.

 _Great._ She thought. _I have to take a herd of dead people on a walk with a hangover._

Deanna had wished her luck and Lexie was given a run down by Rick, Daryl and a couple of the others as to how the plan would unfold. Throughout the entire briefing, Lexie could concentrate on nothing but the fact her eye sockets felt like someone had hit her with a baseball bat and made a mental note to make Aaron pay for plying her with alcohol in order to extract gossip out of her. Regardless of the fact that she had only partially heard the plan, she nodded and climbed into the truck she had been assigned. After a few minutes of settling in and checking her walkie, she started the engine just as Daryl pulled up beside her on his bike.

“Just follow me.” He called out.

She gave him a nod and hit the gas as he glided past her and through the gate.

 

When they reached the quarry, Daryl drove his bike to the bottom of the slope and instructed Lexie to wait at the top. Rick had stationed himself at a major bend in the road along the route they would take that had been reinforced with trucks and a makeshift wall in the hope that the Walkers would take a right turn instead of ploughing ahead. Daryl climbed into the last truck that was holding the thousands of Walkers at bay and started it up, quickly hitting the gas and creating a gap. Lexie held her breath for entire time it took for him to clamber out of the truck and back onto his bike. Her hand hovered over the gun in her leg holster in case any of the threats got too close to him. She was confident she could shoot any of them in the head from her distance, even with a pistol. Luckily, Daryl made it to his bike and started it up, the engines noise grabbing the attention of every single corpse as the noise boomed around the quarry’s walls. He gradually edged the bike up the slope, making sure the Walkers were following behind him. Her foot grazed over the gas as she waited for him to line his bike up with her, watching in the rear-view mirror. Still wearing her sunglasses and suffering the after effects of the night before, she tried to push away how bad she felt and focus on the task in hand, but her brain throbbed and her body complained at her mistreatment of it.

“Alright, they’re almost to the top, lets go.” Daryl encouraged, appearing beside her. “Gotta keep it steady, slow, but not too slow.”

She eased her foot down onto the gas and inched the truck forwards, eventually managing to match Daryl’s speed and finding they were able to creep along the road next to one another as the Walkers followed on behind. She pressed ‘play’ on the trucks CD player and jumped when loud rock music blared from the speakers. Her head cracked with pain and she jabbed the stop button as hard as she could.

“Shit.” She spat, bringing a hand up to massage her temples.

“Ya alright?” Daryl asked, finding it mildly comical but not allowing her to see it.

“I have a hangover.” She admitted. Her arm propped up on the open window. If she was going to tell anyone, it was going to be the introverted, keeper of secrets, Daryl.

“Really” He stated “Party I didn’t about or somethin’?”

“Wine night with Aaron. Remind me to slap him when I see him next.” She griped.

“Wine night?” He enquired.

“I found some old, red wine under the floor of a house just outside of Alexandria. I told Aaron and since then we’ve been working our way through it, a bottle a week. Overdid it last night. I almost died when Deanna told me we were doing this today.”

“And it’s Aaron’s fault?” he asked.

“God damn right it’s his fault. I am far too sensible to get that drunk of my own accord.” She scoffed.

“Nah, ya just easily led.” He commented.

She turned briefly to him, her face serious at first before she smiled and huffed with laughter.

“I guess so.” She agreed.

The engines of the Motorcycle and truck were still successfully drawing the Walkers out and they were now stretched along the road in one, huge line, all trundling forwards in pursuit of Lexie and Daryl. He drove close to her vehicle but kept a watchful eye on what was happening beside him so he could round up any stragglers from the group if he needed to. Lexie pressed ahead, as relaxed as she could be during such a task. It was still a long way until they reached anyone else from the group and she picked up the walkie and checked in with Rick, telling him that they were on their way and it was going without a hitch so far. When she thudded the device onto the seat beside her, she quickly looked at Daryl.

“You requested me.” She mentioned. “Rick told me.”

He shot her a quick look, not able to keep his vision on her in case he accidentally drove into the side of her truck. From her peripheral vision she saw him shake his head and assumed it was because Rick had disclosed the real reason why she had been chosen.

“Yeah” Was all he said and she decided not to push it anymore, simply smiling at him and moving her concentration back to leading the herd.

When they finally reached the bend in the road and the others from the group, Lexie could hear shouting from behind her as she rounded the curve and drove ahead. She looked up in the mirror to see that some of the Walkers had barrelled through the barrier and were being picked off by Rick and various others while the remaining people were fighting to close the gap that had been made. Daryl also looked behind him before swerving closer to the truck.

“I gotta circle back and round ‘em up. Keep goin’, I’ll be back.” He instructed.

Lexie did as she was told and continued on the route that had been discussed at the meeting. She knew it well from being on the outside for so long before Aaron had found them. She had spent many days and nights trekking through the surrounding woodlands with Mel and hunting animals for food. When Daryl had finally reappeared, she had felt a sense of relief after him being gone for so long and the two of them drove along side by side until they met the final point on the map and surged forwards, gaining speed and shooting up the highway until the herd was out of sight. They took a turn and headed back to Alexandria, well away from the groaning crowd of corpses.

When she climbed out of the Truck, Rick was waiting for her with a handshake and so was Deanna. Now, all they had to do was hope that nothing would turn the herd around and that they kept on going. Rick and Abraham discussed gathering a team and heading to the quarry the following day to retrieve any useful materials, or machinery. It had taken almost the entirety of the sunlit hours to move the herd and Lexie’s hangover had subsided somewhere between the third and fourth hour of driving. She was tired and headed home, telling Rick to let her know if he needed help with anything else.

As evening settled across the town, people retreated to their houses, guard shifts rotated and Lexie was seriously glad she didn’t have to sit in the sniper tower until the next night. The thought of curling up on the perch with Poe and her sketch pad was more appealing than ever and she quickly walked back to the house after half heartedly waving at everyone. Eugene, who was stood on Deanna’s front porch was gawping at her and she tried her best not to make eye contact. Daryl, who was much subtler, had quickly glanced up through his hair and watched her walk away from beside his bike.

 *****

At the house, Mel was curled up on the couch, fast asleep when Lexie gently clicked the front door shut and slid off her boots in the hall. She crept into the kitchen and immediately noticed a that Mel had left her a meal on the counter, along with a plate of cookies and a note that read.

_‘I love you. M x’_

She smiled at the gesture and ventured into the living room to layer a blanket over Mel as she slept. Then, she sat in the kitchen and demolished the meal within minutes. She hadn’t even realised how hungry she was until she’d started eating. The plate of cookies however, was something she intended to make last as long as possible. She carefully carried it up the stairs to her room, pausing to check on Mel one last time and deciding she may as well leave her there. She was comfortable, warm and safe.

 *****

Daryl stood in the kitchen alone, leaning on the countertop with his head bowed. Rick, Michonne, Carl and Judith gathered in the living room and the soft thrum of conversation travelled through the house. Carol watched him from the doorway, tapping her fingers on a mug in her hand. He stirred when he heard the sound and looks around at her, perturbed at being caught in deep thought.

“Penny for ‘em” Carol urged.

Daryl was reluctant to disclose what was going on in his head, but if he was going to talk to anyone about it, it was going to be Carol. The one person who would be able to offer sound advice as well as providing a listening ear at a time when he needed it. She had always been the same, always the one that coaxed him to express himself when otherwise, he would let everything build up inside until he exploded.  

“Thinkin’ of going to see Lexie.” He told her, making sure his voice was low enough for no one else to overhear.

“At this late hour. That promising.” She beamed as she glided into the room and gestured with her head to the other side of the kitchen. She knew he wouldn’t want anyone else to hear their conversation and so encouraged him to reduce the risk by moving further away. He followed her, stopping at the other end of the island.  

“She really looks like her.” He sighed, leaning back on the counter and rubbing his chin with one hand.

“Yes, she does. But she’s not her.” Carol pointed out. “You like her. But it’s freaking you out, isn’t it?”

He wouldn’t look at her, finding it to exposing to talk about his feelings and make eye contact in that moment.

“Yeah.” He whispered.

She stepped closer to his side, lowering her head and speaking in a hushed tone.

“Daryl, I think sometimes our souls try to find connections to the people we’ve lost and occasionally it’s through those that are still living. There nothing wrong with it and it’s something I think you should just, allow. Don’t read too much into it and don’t let it stop you from pursuing something that could make you happy again. She wouldn’t want you to be alone. You know that. It’s why she made you promise.”

He contemplated her words, taking his time to process them and she didn’t rush him. She copied his stance, leaning against the counter and staying quiet. Laughter could be heard from the living room and Carol smiled briefly. It was a sound she had missed during the many weeks they’d spent on the road together, starving, thirsty and searching for shelter.

“I really loved her.” Daryl eventually murmured. His eyes were closed and his head lowered.

Carol placed a hand over his on the counter.

“I know you did. But she wanted you to feel that again.” She soothed.

“I don’t know if I want to. Feels like a betrayal or somethin’.” He admitted.

Carol, who had also lost people, understood this completely and was wary of pushing him too much, too quickly. But he was opening up and she wanted to do everything she could to encourage it.

“You deserve to be happy. You did so much for her and she loved you enough to make sure you knew she would be OK with you moving on. You have done so much for this group. Now we are here, with houses and electricity and walls…safety. It’s time to think about yourself” She insisted.

“What if I feel the way I do ’cause of how much like her she is?” He asked.

“Answer me this” She proposed “When you’re not with her and you think about her, do you think about her as Lexie? Or, do you think of someone else when she’s in your thoughts?”

He thought for a moment before finally looking up at her. She could see from his eyes that he was actually managing to find some clarity in the situation.

“Just Lexie.” He replied.

“And what is it that you like about her?” She continued.

“I aint gonna give ya a damn list.” He scoffed.

“If you want my help, yes, you are. So, let’s have it.” She said sternly.

He grumbled to himself and crossed his arms over his chest. He was closing up but Carol trusted her instincts, he would still answer her, she just needed to be patient. He began to chew on his bottom lip, a sure sign that she was about to get an answer.

“She’s different. She aint afraid of it either. She’s funny, smart. Neither of us like talkin’ much, but we talk to each other all the time when we’re together. I like the way see sees things, she tells me about the books she reads. I dunno how the hell she makes the connections she does, but I could listen to her talk about them all day.” He explained.

Carol moved so she was in front of him, forcing him to look at her.

“I think you have your answer.” She stated.

“What do ya mean?” he questioned, confused.

“You said all those things, but you didn’t once mention what she looks like. You’re not seeing the past, Daryl. You’re seeing Lexie.” She smiled.

She could almost see the penny drop when a very slight flicker of realisation flashed across his features. The corner of his mouth curled up into a half smile.

“I see Eugene practically drooling at her. But you see her as who she is. That is so important. I don’t think she knows it at all, but she is very striking and pretty and it’s in her own right, not just because she looks like someone else.” She expressed.

“Yeah, she is.” He agreed.

What he wanted to do with the revelation he had just experienced, he was unsure. But he now understood that all he needed was Carol’s perspective. She had a way of uncomplicating things. Simplifying it so it was easier to digest. Daryl’s mind was always so crowded and loud that he sometimes had a hard time when it came to emotions and feelings and so always chose to just keep it all to himself and say nothing. But now he had clarity and just had to come to a decision about what action to take, or not take.

 *****

The front perch of the house was like a sun trap in the early mornings. Lexie liked to use this side before anyone else woke up. The peace was profound at such an early hour that she almost forgot where she was and why. It had been light for around two hours but the streets were still empty. She sat with her legs dangling down off the front porch roof. Donning a cropped pair of black pants and black sneakers, she felt the sun hit her shins and the warmth increased the longer she sat, leaned back on her hands. Her loose-fitting black vest hung about her torso, too low at the sides and a little too long altogether but she cared little for style these days. The front of it boasted a white logo belonging to a classic rock band. Underneath, she had opted for a camouflage sports bra. Her hair, still dampened from the shower, was braided at the back with shorter strands that had fallen to the sides of her face. She wore Mel’s sunglasses, not intending to give them back any time soon. She had her own, but preferred the huge frames on Mel’s. Not expecting to see anyone at this time in the morning, she was surprised to see Maggie walk past with a shovel in her hands and gloves hanging from her back pocket. Glenn followed on behind her and they passed below where Lexie sat just as Carl emerged onto the porch next door with an excited Judith, Rick, Michonne, Carol and finally, Daryl who closed the door behind them. Everyone seemed to be heading in the same direction and Lexie watched as they met up at the end of the street and moved aside when the gate opened and a truck moved inside, loaded to the brim with metal, wood and equipment that she assumed was from the quarry.

She figured something must have been communicated to everyone but her and Mel as Aaron and Eric also turned up with shovels and a wooden box full of what looked like cuttings of plants. From what she could see, some people were starting to unpack the truck and the others were preparing for some serious digging. She scrabbled back on the roof and climbed into her room, grabbing her boots and swinging her door open. Mels room, on the other side of the house wasn’t going to stop her. Lexie banged through the door and dropped her boots on top of Mel, who was sound asleep. She awoke with a start and a few choice curse words and blinked her bleary eyes at Lexie, who by that point, had the drapes grasped in her hands, she flung them open and sunlight shot through the room. Mel recoiled and dragged the covers up over her head.

“C’mon, get up. Looks like we’ve been missed out of a communication. People are gathering by the gate. We need to help them.” Lexie announced.

“Oh, for god sakes, Lex!” Mel groaned under the covers. “If they didn’t tell us, they don’t need us.”

Lexie turned with a serious expression on her face. She took hold of the bottom of Mel’s sheets and with one, fluid tug, whipped them from the bed. Mel screamed as the cold air hit her bare arms and legs and she curled up into a ball, clutching her pillow.

“Melissa, there is a pregnant lady out there. Do you know what she’s doing? She’s digging. We are not going to sit on our asses all day while a pregnant lady digs! Get up, put those boots on and meet me downstairs in ten minutes.”

Lexie could hear Mel protesting as loudly as she could but opted not to listen as she stormed out of the room and down the stairs.

When the two of them reached the gate, Mel glanced around and spotted people digging up the grass on both sides of the street. Her heart sank at the prospect of manual labour but she figured she had to keep herself fit somehow and a little physical activity couldn’t hurt. But she wasn’t about to exert herself by any stretch of the imagination.

Lexie walked up to Rick and gestured to all the work going on around them. Her hand slowly swinging around and her eyebrow raised.

“We didn’t get an invite to this shindig. What’s up with that?” She asked.

Daryl, who was unloading a truck with Abraham and Glenn behind Rick, stopped briefly and smirked at Lexie’s sass laced comment.

“We have plenty of bodies, didn’t seem necessary to bother you guys.” Rick explained.

“Why is everyone digging?” Mel enquired.

“We’re creating places to grow crops.” Rick responded.

“Huh. Cool.” Mel chirped.

“You have a pregnant lady digging a vegetable patch in this heat? Lexie prodded confrontationally.

Again, Daryl paused behind Rick, glancing from him to Lexie. Her abrupt and direct question also catching the attention of Glenn, who wandered up beside Rick and slapped his gloved hands together, sending a small cloud of dust up into the air.

“Believe me” Glenn said. “She wants to. There is just no telling her. We’ve all tried”

Rick was smiling at both Glenn’s answer and Lexie’s confused expression. Daryl was still listening in from behind them. Lexie turned and grabbed Mel’s arm, dragging her across the road and up the step of the side walk, aiming for Maggie. The three men watched in surprise as Lexie stopped in front of her, dropped Mel’s hand and pointed to the shovel that Maggie grasped in both hands.

“Hand it over.” She barked. “You’re pregnant. I’ll take over for you. Mel will bring refreshments”

“I-I will?” Mel whispered.

“Yes” Lexie hissed through her teeth at her.

Maggie’s face broke into a huge smile.

“Honestly, I’m fine, I wanna help.” She said.

“Sorry, not an option.” Lexie argued, holding her hand out further in front of the shovel. Maggie backed up slightly.

Glenn, Daryl and Rick all now stood side by side, trying not to snigger at the sight before them.

“I tried to convince her not to go all morning. Girl’s got bigger balls than me, that’s for sure.” Glenn quipped.

Quiet, unassuming Lexie had somehow got a bee in her bonnet about a pregnant Maggie digging in the heat and Daryl thought it was amusing, bold and extremely telling all at once. He knew she must have felt strongly about it for her to even be speaking in public let alone making such a scene.

“It’s Lexie, right?” Maggie asked. Lexie nodded. “I’m not all that far along yet and I can still pitch in before I get really big. I’m used to doing my bit, helping out where I can.”

“You can help out by sitting your ass down and supervising.” Lexie snapped, pointing to Maggie’s abdomen. “That baby is the future. Along with Judith and Carl and any other young people that may be out there. We need to protect them. I get that you want to help, so I’ll compromise with you. You do an hour, then Mel or I will take over, we rotate like that until it’s done. Deal?”

Everyone was now observing Lexie’s bossy confrontation with Maggie and Mel’s jaw was almost on the floor at her sisters completely out of the blue change in character. Although she suspected she may have an inkling as to why she felt so passionately about it. She looked over her shoulder to see Daryl, Glenn and Rick all still watching, except they had been joined by Aaron and Eric, who were covered in mud and dust. Maggie considered Lexie’s offer for a few seconds, studying her stern and stubborn look. Eventually, she sighed and held out the shovel.

“It’s sweet that you’ve offered. So, alright. Deal” Maggie smiled.

Mel flailed her hand at everyone in a desperate attempt to send them all a ‘look busy’ message before her sister noticed that pretty much the entire community was staring at her. Daryl, who had got the message straight away, gently slapped the backs of Glenn and Rick.

“C’mon, give me a hand with this” He told them.

Maggie took up a seat on the steps of a nearby house as Lexie set to work, digging like her life depended on it. She considered that the more she got done, the less work there would be left to do for Maggie. After only ten minutes, the sun was already slowing her down along with being dressed in black. Her forehead dripped with perspiration but she still carried on.

Mel had announced to everyone that she was heading to the pantry to collect some food and water and had been stopped by Aaron on her way. Daryl could also hear this conversation as he tinkered with a large piece of machinery from the quarry at the side of the road.

“Hey” Aaron stopped Mel by stepping in front of her as she went to pass. “Is Lexie OK? What the hell was that?”

Mel quickly glanced over her shoulder at her sister, still throwing herself into the work like a trooper.

“She gets kinda funny about protecting children. I think it all comes from before my parents adopted her. Just gotta let her do her thing. She’ll calm down soon enough. You want some lemonade?” She grinned.

“Uh, sure. Thanks.” Aaron agreed as Mel ambled along the sidewalk away from the group.

 

Daryl was now making his way back to the truck and Aaron had spotted him looking over at Lexie intermittently as he lined up a metal beam on the back of the truck. Recognising that it would be way too heavy for one person to lift, no matter how strong Daryl was, Aaron jogged over to help. The beam had slid out half way but was being blocked by something.

“I got it, hold on.” Aaron stated as he climbed up onto the truck and began moving various items from the top of the beam, clearing a space around it so it could be moved. Every time he looked up, Daryl’s attention was on Lexie.

“It wasn’t love at first sight y’know.” Aaron casually said.

Daryl shot him a baffled look, but inside knew exactly what he was alluding to and began to wonder how he was going to avoid having to have this conversation

“What?” He grunted.

“Eric and I. We were friends before it moved onto anything else. Friends make the best lovers.” He told him, aware that he needed to keep his voice down in case anyone else were to hear.

“Why ya tellin’ me this?” Daryl demanded, his hands dropping from the beam.

“Just making conversation.” Aaron grinned.

Daryl knew exactly what he was doing, instead of gracing Aaron with some kind of giveaway response, he turned his attention back to the beam, taking hold of it and using all his weight to shift it from it’s trap. It finally moved and Aaron helped it carry it from the vehicle.

 

When an hour was up, Lexie handed the shovel to Mel and headed to the wall outside the armoury for some peace. She needed to be away from everyone else after the drama she had caused. She swiped a bottle of water from a table Mel had set up that was full of energy bars and lemonade and wandered off alone. She wiped the sweat from her brow with the back of her wrist as she sat down and took a long drink of water, gasping for air once she finally stopped. She had closed her eyes and opened them to find Daryl crossing the street towards her.

“Hey” He called out.

“Hi.” She tilted her head up in greeting.

He sat next to her on the wall, sipping from his own bottle of water. His arms and the exposed part of his chest between the open top buttons of his shirt were slick with sweat and Lexie mustered all of her self-control not to look.

“Ya OK?” He asked.

“You mean after ordering Maggie around and sassing Rick? Yeah, fine.” She scoffed. She was now regretting her earlier dominant display and was starting to feel embarrassed for not honing it in a bit and being subtler about her thoughts on the situation.

“You were right. She needs to take it easy” He offered in an attempt to make her feel better.

“My mother drank and smoked when she was pregnant with me. It’s a miracle I wasn’t born with some kind of developmental delay. I know Maggie isn’t anything like that, I just couldn’t stand by and let her overheat in the sun.” She reasoned.

“I get it.” He nodded, briefly looking at her, his eyes falling to her tattooed forearm.

“Been meanin’ to ask…” He said as he gently touched the soft skin of her arm with his index finger. Lexie froze at the completely unexpected contact except for her eyes, which shot down to her arm and fixed on his finger which was tenderly drawing a line over the lines of her tattoo.

_What is he doing?!_

“…What’s this mean?”

Lexie fought to catch a breath that just didn’t seem to be there anymore, it had hitched in her throat and it took all of her concentration to inhale without seeming like a nervous mess. Even though she had fallen asleep on his arm unintentionally on the roof one night, her skin under his fingertip felt like it was burning, because he had made the choice to touch her. It burned in a deliciously addictive way and for a moment, she allowed herself a small fantasy; if the touch of a fingertip felt that electrifying, what would it feel like to be even closer to him?

_He’s touching me. He’s actually touching me._

“Um…It’s the date I was adopted.” She managed.

“Roman numerals.” He commented, lifting his finger away. “And the Queen of clubs?”

“Don’t have the time to explain that one right now.” She smiled.

He didn’t reply. He pulled a red rag from his back pocket and wiped his brow. Lexie quickly looked at the floor when she realised, she was ogling him again. It was something that was beginning to mildly irritate her. She had never looked at anyone with such intentions before and she had to admit that while it was niggling and distracting, he did make for quite the sight.

“Ya still wanna leave, Lexie?” He asked.

With her vision fixed on the floor, she blinked rapidly at his sudden and to the point question. In the last couple of weeks, she had spent so much time with Daryl that the thought of leaving had been pushed to the back of her mind. But it wasn’t gone. She had hidden it in a box at the back of her mind but had not secured the lock. The idea not gone forever.

“I’m growing as a person.” She mused. “Growth can be painful, learning lessons and having to accept things that just don’t seem right. Change can be even more painful, you think your settled but you never really are. But, nothing is more painful than being stuck somewhere you don’t belong.”

She could feel his eyes on her now, grazing over her features, the side of her face. He hadn’t expected such an answer.

“You do belong. You belong here with Mel…” He uttered.

As much as she loved Mel, she knew that Alexandria was all she needed to continue with her life. Lexie needed something else, what that was, she wasn’t sure and she had no idea if she was going to find it here, inside these walls.

“…And Aaron” Daryl continued.

She owed Aaron a lot. Mainly, her sanity. He was a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, a provider of advice and good fun. In a way, Lexie wished she could take her best friend with her, where ever she went.

“And me.” Daryl added.

It was almost like he’d left it until last for a reason. Like he was separating himself from the other people that should be a reason for her to stay.

“Told ya before, I don’t like not seein’ you” He mumbled.

She bit her lip. _Say it._ She thought.

“You’re the main reason I’m still here.” She sighed, slipping off the wall and walking away from him, back to her work at the vegetable patch.

She meant it for a number of reasons; because he had bothered to take her outside the walls, teach her something, allow her time and freedom. He had given her someone to relate to, someone who understood her and someone she could trust. He had also drawn out of her something she had never had to deal with before, she had feelings for him.

 

Mel and Lexie dutifully took turns to help Maggie with her task during the rest of day and by the late evening, it was completed, ready for the planting of cuttings and seeds. Daryl had skulked around, not straying far from Lexie unless he had no choice. He had witnessed her dig earthworms up and collect them in her hands before throwing them at Mel. Causing a loud and hilarious scene that resulted in Mel threatening to poison Lexie later that night. She had merely giggled at her sister. Her white, captivating smile stirring a sense of longing in Daryl.

Eugene had been on the gate for a shift for a couple of hours and had spent the duration with his eyes firmly locked on Lexie. Daryl had approached him, patted his shoulder and told him to let it go. An act that was potentially problematic when he pondered that if he were to get anywhere with Lexie in the future, it could mean a strained friendship between him and Eugene. But after her declaration that he was the main reason for her sticking around in the community, over her sister and her best friend, he thought it was worth the risk.

 

The back perch was cold that night and Lexie had dragged out every blanket, sheet, pillow and warm item that she could find. Determined to sit outside and not in the confines of her room. It wasn’t so much a fear of enclosed spaces, more a fear of her inability to exist within them. After so long in the open, walls had a tendency to throw her equilibrium off and so, most nights, she’d rather have frozen to death than been inside the house.

She had created quite the snug in the corner with two lit lanterns and the plate of cookies Mel had made her beside her. She munched through two cookies and turned the page of her book when she heard footsteps on the ladder. Looking up, she saw the top wobble and smiled widely for a few seconds before having to hide how happy she was that Daryl was going to be joining her. When he reached the top, she said nothing, closed her book and held out the plate of cookies. His eyebrows raised and he walked towards her, taking a cookie and shoving it in his mouth as if he hadn’t eaten in days. Lexie nudged her head to the sit, motioning for him to sit down. 

“You sure? I can go, if ya wanna be alone.” He said.

“No, stay. I told you before, you can come up here whenever you want.” She replied, waving a hand at him and setting the plate down with her other hand.

He had changed from earlier and she noticed a different sleeveless shirt under his leather vest. His hair also seemed damp, as if he hadn’t long been out of the shower. Lexie had also changed into some black sweatpants and another baggy vest but this time she wore a black zip-up hoodie to protect her from the cold. They both set about clearing the plate, not bothering to talk in between bites. Lexie drew a large blanket around her shoulders and noticed that his arms were covered in goosepimples.

“Are you cold?” She asked

“M’alright.” He shrugged.

She shifted closer to him, gathering the blanket so there was more on one side and lifted her arm, draping it over his shoulders. He sat forward slightly and helped her adjust it so it covered both of their backs. Although he would have been fine without it, she could read him better than he thought.

"Thanks.”

“No problem.” 

There were things that Lexie wanted to say to him about the day they’d first met, in her father’s gun store. When she had struggled to act normally around him due to him being the first person to have provoked some kind of sexual attraction out of her.

“The day that you bought those guns from my dad’s store...he let you in because he wanted to help you. Not because of your rich people’s credit card. He never said it, but that’s the kind of guy he was. I guess I just wanted to clarify that”

“Seemed like a good guy.” He expressed.

“He was.” She confirmed.

“He’s gone?” He questioned, instantly regretting asking such a potentially painful question. “Sorry, ya ain’t gotta answer that.”

“It’s ok. Yeah, he’s gone. He got bit.” She sighed, shifting closer to him so the blanket covered more of her shoulder. Her arm was now touching his. The result wasn’t anywhere near as intense as earlier on in the day, the fabric of her hoodie providing a barrier, but never the less, she still felt sparks flit over her skin inside her clothes.

“You put him down?” He wanted to know.

“Actually, Mel did. He was her blood.” She stated.

Memories clouded Daryl’s mind. Every time he had had to be the one to end someone’s life. Not always when they’d been bitten. Then there was the one time that bothered him the most. The one he wished he could erase from his memory.  The one that had never left him.

“Mind if I ask ya something?” He queried.

“Sure.” She smiled.

“Ya think it’s right that folks want the people that love ‘em to be the ones to put em down if they get bit?”

Lexie remembered back to the gun store. When her dad had left to find food. He had returned with half a dozen tins and a chunk missing from his arm. A stubborn streak and little emotional blackmail had given him time to say goodbye to his girls and it was a time that Lexie would never forget. Having just lost their adoptive mother to cancer, she and Mel had curled up with him on a camp bed and hugged him until he fell quiet. Then, Mel had taken the pistol from the holster on Lexie’s leg and shot him in the head without so much as a blink. Lexie had waited for some kind of rush of despair from her and for a few moments she panicked that it would never come, that it would be suppressed until an inconvenient time when it would re-surface and cause her some kind of breakdown. But it had happened eventually. Mel collapsed onto the floor and cried for what seemed like forever in Lexie’s arms.

 “Yes, I think it’s right.” She expressed “Because it’s not an act of murder. It’s an act of mercy. The last thing you can do for that person is to end their suffering. In a way, it’s the ultimate act of love.”

“Ya don’t think it’s… I dunno… unfair on the person that’s gotta do it?” He continued.

“The way the world is now, I think everything is unfair.” She uttered thoughtfully.

“Yeah, guess it is.”

Daryl contemplated the decisions he’d had to make in his own past. The promises he’d kept and the things he’d done which still caused him to hold pain in his heart. Lexie’s opinion of it had helped him to look at things from a different angle. It was one of the things he liked about her and he had told Carol that much the previous night during their conversation.

“You look really different to how I remembered you.” She said.

“You don’t.” He responded quickly “I mean, that’s a good thing.”

“Apocalypse suits me.” She grinned.

“It does.” He agreed, a little quicker than he had intended.

Daryl stared at her, unable to drag his eyes away from her face. She was smiling subtly at him, also finding it difficult to look away. She didn’t want to. She wanted to sit there all night and look at him. Almost a minute passed and a charged energy had formed between them. Daryl recognised it as a feeling he had only ever felt once before. The tension was broken when Lexie yawned, her hand coming up to shield his view of her.

“You’re tired, I should go.” He commented.

“No. Stay. If you want. I’m OK.” She insisted.

“Alright.”

She picked up the last cookie and snapped it in half, handing him his share. He looks down at it in a callback to the first time they’d had guard duty together and she’d shared her protein bar without even asking him. He took the cookie and made little work of making it disappear.

“Good to see you and Mel talkin’ today”

“Yeah. She made me dinner and the cookies. We talked. I um…told her we’re just friends.”

Daryl didn’t respond and Lexie felt a stab of panic. Telling herself he probably just didn’t have anything to say, she sat back and began picking at her nail polish.

Daryl looked out over the trees, listening to Lexie’s steady breathing beside him and feeling the ever so slight warmth of her arm, her hoodie against his skin. He was no longer bothered about being cold, but he wasn’t going to pass up on being close to her. He wanted to know something. A particular question he wanted to ask that was now on the tip of his tongue and after speaking to Carol and weighing up the possible outcomes, he figured their friendship was unlikely to be lost over one question.

“That all we are?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the comments and the love!  
> Anyone that has read the Angel and the Phoenix will be putting the pieces together by now. I have to say, the decision I made with this was controversial and I am aware I could potentially piss people off with it and lose some readers. I can only hope that people stick with it and aren't too mad at me! But, It was my plan all along to write two intertwined stories about love and loss, both in and out of the apocalypse. It challenging subject matter which was appealing to me. I should say; you don't have to have read both stories for it to make sense. This is written so it can be a stand alone story too.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of you hate it, some of you love it. It was never my intention to mislead anyone, I simply couldn't tag this as what it really is because it would have given the twist away. But like I've said before, it's also a stand alone story.   
> Very risky to do this to a much loved OC. The fact she was so well liked was a massive compliment. But this is the apocalypse and not everyone survives. Still, there is hope, there has to be :)  
> Huge thanks to those fans of The Angel and the Phoenix that are actually still with this story despite the plot twist! To those that are new to this and haven't read The Angel and the Phoenix, you can still read them the other way around <3
> 
> Bit of a bittersweet one now.

She slowly turned her head to him, her heart starting to hammer in her chest as her skin prickled with unease. _Did he really just ask me that? Shit. What do I say?!_

Gradually, his vision eased around until he was looking to his side, waiting for her reply.

“Do you…want it to be more?” She asked. Somehow, somewhere, she had mustered up the courage to reply.

“Do you?” He muttered.

In her mind, Lexie had an idea of how she wanted this to play out. She had conjured up a scenario in the last few seconds and already it was going haywire.

“Um” She stammered “Daryl, I’m not very good at this.”

“Hell, neither am I. Just answer the question.” He said.

To her, it seemed like an eternity before she actually managed to form some semblance of an answer. Her thoughts were jumbled and her stomach was churning with a strange feeling that she had never felt before. Aware that whatever she said in that moment was going to pave the way forward for them both and whatever was happening between them, she was feeling the pressure. _I have to be honest. I don’t want to lie to him._

“Maybe. Yeah” She whispered.

Try as he might, Daryl was seriously failing to disguise the small but intensely powerful smile that had emerged on his lips. He looked down into his lap, a small huff escaping his lungs and Lexie almost died there and then at the sight.

_Oh my god. He really does like me._ She thought.

“I answered. Now it’s your turn.” She pressed, nudging him slightly in the shoulder. He was still smiling subtly into his lap, his hair obscuring some of the expression she so desperately wanted to see. She waited patiently, seeing him suck his bottom lip into his mouth as he looked back up at her. He nodded, ever so slightly, but it was there.

“Yeah”. He said.

She felt like she was about to burst. Like she wanted to stand up and throw her hands in the air and yell from the rooftop that Daryl Dixon _likes_ her. Somebody likes her that she actually felt the same about. But instead of such a rowdy and bold display, she simply brought her hand to her mouth and bit down on her thumbnail, hoping that he couldn’t tell that she was so happy her veins felt like they had electrical currents shooting through them.

“I don’t know what to say” She confessed, hearing him sigh from beside her.

“You should know somethin’.” He started. “I’m dealin’ with some shit that happened before we got here. Have been for a while. Just still tryin’ to process it. So, I dunno if I can promise anythin’. I wish I could, but I don’t wanna hurt you.”

“I don’t want you to promise anything.” She told him. “If it happens, it happens and if it doesn’t, that’s OK.”

“Alright. I just…I don’t want ya to think I ain’t interested” he paused and exhaled slowly. “I am.”

“OK” she grinned at him, no longer bothered about hiding how happy it had made her to know that he felt the same.

“I should get goin’.” He expressed. “Ya got plans tomorrow?”

“I’m in the armoury from 6am until midday. Then in the tower from 11pm until 1am. Other than that, nope.”

_Please ask to see me._ She thought _then I won’t have to ask you._

“I’m goin’ to the quarry to give Rick and the others a hand bringing some more stuff back. Maybe I’ll see ya after that.” He considered.

“You know where to find me.” She uttered.

Daryl tugged the blanket from his shoulder and pulled it through the gap between his back and the wall. He then lifted it and draped it over Lexie, making sure her arms were covered and got to his feet, walking over to the ladder on the far side. When he turned to descend the ladder, he caught sight of her twirling a strand of hair around her index finger and staring at nothing in particular in the distance.

_She is so damn pretty._

“Night” he called out.

Her gaze shifted to him and she flashed him a wide smile. “Goodnight.”  

 

 *****

Lexie’s entire armoury shift was akin to torture after the events of the previous night. Her concentration was all over the place and had resulted in her starting three sketches only to end up defacing them and throwing them away. She checked guns in and out all day but the highlight, by far, was when she saw Daryl briefly in the morning. She had made the choice to keep the conversation between them the night before to herself. She was going to keep this one close to her chest and wanted little interference from anyone else. Daryl had stopped by to check out a gun for a trip to the quarry that he didn’t need. He had a knife and a crossbow and was going to be spending more time driving than anything else. But it was an excuse to see her. A good one. Lexie had taken a deep breath when she noticed him walk through the door.

Mel sat on the other side of the room having dropped in for a reason that Lexie still hadn’t managed to get out of her. She was cross legged on top of a large plastic box eating an apple and had greeted Daryl with a grin and a quick raise of her eyebrows to Lexie.

“Hey” He said to Lexie as he approached the shelving and picked up a gun. She had her boots on the top, her sketch pad in her lap and her chair leaned back.

“Morning.” She replied, trying not to smile too widely and come across as too keen. In truth, Lexie felt like she was a teenager again, doing something that she should have done all those years ago but was too busy concentrating on finding herself to be bothered with. Now, she cursed herself for getting to 34 and having absolutely no game.

He held the handgun up and Lexie slowly removed her boots from the table and slid the ledger towards him. Her eyes were locked on his and they both smiled shyly at one another. Mel craned her neck to witness the bashful and tension-filled display.

“No need for the map. I know where you’ll be.” She pointed out as she pushed her chair back and stood up. She stepped up to the filing cabinet and pulled open a drawer, selecting a box of bullets and handing them to him. When he took them, his fingers grazed hers and for a split second, he held on before letting her go. Lexie could tell that Mel had missed this tiny, hidden, gesture of affection from him and felt a smug sense of satisfaction that it was hers to cherish.

“Gonna be in and out all day. Might not be able to check this back in until tonight.” He warned.

“It’s fine. Olivia will be here tonight.” She told him.

He nodded a couple of times and even though he had acquired what he had visited for, he still hadn’t left and stepped closer to her.

“So, when ya gonna tell me what the story behind that tattoo is?” He whispered.

“Patience is a virtue, Daryl.” She said breezily.

He gave her a slightly surprised look and huffed, a smile tugging at his lips.

“Alright. Thanks for the gun.” He smirked, backing up.

“Be-“ She called out.

“-safe.” He interrupted “I know. I will.”

He turned and headed for the door, holding a hand up to Mel just before he disappeared from sight.

Mel sat like a statue on the plastic box, her mouth wide open and her head full of questions.

 “Say what you have to say.” Lexie groaned.

“What? Me? Oh, I don’t have to say anything.” Mel lied.

“Mel, I am not an imbecile. I know you are bursting to comment.”

“Oh my god you two are so adorable the way you tip toe around one another how have you not jumped him yet?! You could cut the tension in here with a knife and I love the way you guys smile at each other, it’s fucking cuuuute! There, I said it all.”  She rambled in one, long sentence, the words all mashed together.

“We both agreed to just see what happens. If anything happens.” Lexie shrugged with one shoulder as she sat back in her seat at the desk.

“That could take weeks!” Mel complained.

“Then it takes weeks.” Lexie affirmed.

“Lexiiiiiie” Mel whined.

“For someone as solitary as he is, he seems to seek me out and we spend a lot of time together, that’s a good start.” Lexie reasoned.

“I guess Eric, Aaron and I will just have to carry on gossiping until we have something concrete for now.” Mel suggested.

“I guess you will. Although, there is one thing I can tell you.” Lexie said.

Mel sprang off her box and shuffled across the room to the desk, perching on sit sideways.

“Go.” She ordered.

“You met Daryl, before he arrived at Alexandria. You just don’t remember him.” She said. Part of her really looking forward to Mel’s reaction.

“What are you talking about?” She asked, her eyebrows pinched together and her face slightly screwed up. She shook her head slightly and squinted at her sister.

“The gun store. When everything started to go wrong. Black Amex guy. That was Daryl.” Lexie revealed, able to see the exact moment when the cogs in Mel’s head began to start turning. She gasped and her hand flew to her face. “That wasn’t Daryl.” She whispered.

Lexie nodded at her knowingly.

“It _was_ Daryl! I remember! He even told us his name! NO. FUCKING. WAY! He looks so different!” She cried.

“I know” Lexie agreed. “But I knew it was him as soon as I saw the wings on his back.”

Mel comically slapped herself in the side of the head before clamping her hand over her mouth for a few seconds.

“What a small world.” She said to herself.

“Small Georgia.” Lexie smiled.

“Does he recognise us?”

“Yes.”

“Well, I feel like a dufus for not realising.”

Lexie chuckled to herself. She had delighted in telling Mel and knew it would lead to her feeling slightly embarrassed. However, it wasn’t like Daryl was going to bring it up in conversation. So, she figured Mel’s digits would remain intact.

 *****

 

When Olivia took over at the armoury. Lexie checked out a rifle and decided to go hunting alone for a couple hours. Wandering through the trees in the warm, afternoon air and tracking animals was the only thing that had successfully managed to distract her attention and keep it. When she read, her mind wandered, when she sketched, she failed to concentrate. Doing something physical, which meant she had to pay attention not only to tracking but to her surroundings to avoid getting bitten by a Walker, was the perfect afternoon activity.  

She returned with numerous squirrels, two rabbits and a opossum., a collection she figured Daryl would be impressed by if he had seen it. When she handed her rifle back in, she made her way up the street towards the pantry to see Mel, who she knew could probably made a decent meal out of her kills but had to skin them and ration them just the same as everything else. Mel was talking an older lady through a recipe when Lexie arrived and slumped her dead animals onto the counter. She did recognise the woman, but had no idea of her name so just smiled thinly and tried to be polite. When she left, Mel turned to her and gave her an impressed look.

“Nice work.” She complimented.

They both stepped further towards the open door when they heard a vehicle tearing up the street. It made a loud skidding noise as Daryl hit the breaks from inside and jumped out of the cab. He nodded in acknowledgement at them and set about removing the materials from the trucks flat bed and taking them into the garage of the house opposite. The sight to Lexie and Mel was quite something as his sweat covered muscles shone in the heat and he grunted as he heaved heavy wooden planks and various tools from the vehicle. Lexie glanced to the side to see that Mel’s mouth was hung open and she was mesmerised. She couldn’t blame her, when she looked back at Daryl, she also seemed to lose her self-restraint.

“Holy shit” Mel breathed.

“We should stop staring. This is real obvious.” Lexie warned.

“I don’t want to.”

“Same.”

“I hope you know” Mel said, her eyes still firmly fixed on Daryl “When I implied that I would be backing off, it didn’t mean I had a lobotomy.”

“Nope. I got that. Don’t blame you.”

“Be still, my quivering loins” Mel whispered.

“Mel. Behave.”  

“He is so fine.”

“I know. I can’t believe he likes me.”

Daryl took them both unawares when he looked up and caught them staring at him, open mouthed, as if he was some kind of show on a stage. They both flinched and turned their backs to him. Mel clears her throat.

“OKAY! So, if you could just finish up skinning those, that’d be great!” Lexie exclaimed

“Alrighty then! I’ll…get right to that!” Mel chimed in.

Daryl shook his head at them both from across the street and climbed back into the truck.

“It’s ok, it wasn’t that obvious.” Lexie said.

“No. It wasn’t.” Mel agreed.

“It was, wasn’t it?” Lexie countered

“Yep.”

“Shit.”

 *****

 

Once her tower shift was finished it was 1am and she headed straight over the wall. She craved the sense of freedom she’d felt from earlier when she’d been hunting alone. It had cleared her mind and given her a chance to think, despite the threat of Walkers milling about. She pushed through the trees, her flashlight low to the ground and her knife drawn and acting as a kind of hedge trimmer as she passed dense foliage and low hanging branches. When she got to the edge of the woods, she glimpsed the empty row of store fronts, spotting a Walker rounding a car beside her. She raised her knife again and carefully stepped closer to it. It was female, young when it turned and dressed in a waitressing uniform. Its scalp had been partially peeled back from its hair being caught in something. She threw her arm forwards, the knife sinking into its eye with a sickening splat. She withdrew it and blood dripped along the sharp blade, pooling on the floor as the body crumpled.

She backed up and turned on her heels, her blade in her hand as she walked, ready to take on any more Walkers and drying in the cold air. She climbed the black, iron steps to the abandoned store and shoved the heavy door open. Shocked to see that the fire was alight and Daryl was sat in one of the windows on the ledge.

“What are you doing here?” She blurted out, not intending to seem so curt.

“Needed to think.” He mumbled. “Ya OK?” He gestured to her knife with his hand.

“Yeah, was just a walker outside. I can go, if you want to be alone.”

“Naw. S’ok.”

She noticed the downcast look on his face, his broad shoulders slumped and his eyes were missing their usual sparkle when he looked at her.

“Is something wrong?” She asked.  

He glared at her though his hair and for a moment she got a sinking feeling, like he was going to tell her something awful.

“Sit down.” He ordered, moving off from the ledge and sinking down against a metal pillar closer to the trash can fire. Lexie began to panic and fumbled with her hands once she had sat opposite him. She was almost certain he was going to tell her that he had made a mistake the previous night and didn’t actually feel the same as she did. She wanted to explain herself before he said anything else.

“If you didn’t mean what you said last night, it’s OK. It doesn’t have to be a thing. I mean, it’s a thing now but there’s no pressure and I don’t even really know what I’m doing or what is supposed to happen now. So, it’s fine, really. We’re friends and that’s OK-“

“Lexie?”

“Yes?”

“Stop talkin’.”

“OK.”

He slowly rubbed his hands over his legs as he thought of the right words to use. What he was about to tell her wasn’t something he had told anyone for over a year. He never thought he would have to, but life was full of unexpected situations, especially in this new world.  

“Before the turn. I was living with someone. She was a good person. The best kind of person and she changed my life. She was the one that let me use the black Amex card the first day we met. Hadn’t been livin’ with her long, then the world went to shit. We survived in the woods for a while, me, her, my brother and her sister. Then, we found ricks group camped round a quarry. They let us stay. She settled in real easy. She was a people person, friendly, trusting. She got along real well with Carol.”

He paused for a moment to check she was still with him. She was, her eyes wide in the flickering orange of the fire. She let go of her knife and placed it quietly on the floor beside her. He took a deep breath and shifted, sitting cross-legged as he began to tell her the most difficult part.

“One day, my brother and some of the others went into the city on a run. I went out huntin’. When I got back, everyone was lookin’ at me. Even my brother. I ain’t never seen a look like that on his face before. Carol takes me into this RV they had and there she was. My girl. All laid up and feverish. Big ass bite on her shoulder. Everything around me just… stopped.”

She shifted forwards along the floor in front of him, situating herself so she was mirroring his position, right in front of him. His hand lay motionless on his leg and she wanted so badly to pick it up and hold it. But neither of them was good with physical affection and she still wasn’t convinced he wasn’t going to tell her that he’d acted in haste last night.

“Had to put her down. She made me promise. The person I was, the person she made me into… gone. Died with her. Since then, I just been survivin’ the only way I know how. Ain’t ever looked at nobody like I looked at her. Ain’t wanted to since.”

“Daryl, I’m so sorry.” She said quietly. “She must have meant a lot to you.”

“Yeah. Everything.” He nodded.

“What was her name?”

“Faith.”

_** Then ** _

**_Her eyes are bloodshot, marbleised, glossy windows to a rapidly fading, beautiful soul. One that was irreplaceable, unique. One that had changed him forever. He had known longing, he had known desperation and fear. Longing for her, desperation when he had made mistakes and fear of seeing her fade before him. But he had also known love, she had shown it to him. Opened his heart to a world where anything was possible as long as she was with him, believing in him and allowing him to be his true self._ **

**_Her skin is waxy, greying and pallid. Sweat beads all over her, a shiny and deadly appearance he never thought he would have to witness on her. She holds out a weak and trembling hand to him. His fingers grip hers with the ferocity of someone holding onto a rescuer as they fell from a ledge into an abyss. It was the last time he would ever hold her hand._ **

**_Tears travel from the corners of her eyes and pool on the pillow beneath her head. Blood pulses from a crescent moon on her shoulder under a crimson stained dressing. His face crumples, his eyes press shut and his head lowers. He brings her hand to his heart. The heart she had given him. Take it back. It’s yours. I have no use for it without you._ **

**_“Faith” He whispers, his knees giving way under him as he slumps onto her body, burying his face into her neck._ **

**_She struggles to commit to the slightest of movements as her delicate fingers lace into his scruffy, knotted hair. A light kiss placed on the side of his face._ **

**_“You have to keep going” She whispers._ **

**_He sits back and looks at her. His love, his life, his entire world as she shakes and swallows hard. The pain is great. He wants to take it away, to bear it as his own so she doesn’t have to suffer. So she doesn’t have to go._ **

**_“I can’t.” He utters. Salty tears race down his cheeks from his brimming, hazy eyes blurred with a grief that is already beginning to creep into his soul._ **

**_“Yes, you can. I believe in you” She tells him. “You promised me. Find someone who makes you happy and hold onto them so tight, like you did with me.”_ **

**_“Please don’t go.” He pleads, gripping her hand, pressure builds in the small joints of her fingers._ **

**_“You have to do it.”_ **

**_“No. No. Please.”_ **

**_“Daryl, I want the last face I see to be yours.” She smiles, reaching up and brushing a thumb across his weathered and tired skin. It hasn’t been long but the new, dangerous world they live in is taking its toll._ **

**_“I don’t know how to-how to live without you anymore.” He stammers._ **

**_His tears drop onto the sheet that covers her and grow as they sink into the fabric, creating a devastating roadmap of his despair. She links a finger under his chin and brings his face up to see his eyes._ **

**_“You’re going to be the one to end my suffering. Because it hurts, Daryl. The pain is too much. Then, you’re going to carry on. You’re going to survive. You’re going to be brave and courageous but you’ll never forget your honour. Make sure there is honour in everything you do. You’re going to protect those you care about. You’re going to find someone who you’ll fall in love with and all the guilt you will feel about betraying me will weigh you down. Until you remember. Remember what I’m saying to you. It’s OK to move on. It’s OK to love her. I want you to. You made promises to me. Please, stand by them.”_ **

**_He can’t imagine it. He can’t picture anything in his mind except her. The first day they met. The first time they spoke. The glint in her eye when she had first smiled at him. The overwhelming rush of nervous excitement when he had seen her in the long, black dress with the plunging neckline. She was like a queen. The way everything fell away and they were the only two people in the world when she had kissed him for the first time and seemed to warp time and space and he never, ever wanted it to end. The first time they had spent the night together, wrapped in each other’s embrace. Fingers tracing over smooth skin, gasps and moans all intermingled in a glorious chorus of delicious moments that would form one of the most precious memories of his life. She was a queen. She was his queen. Then, there were the promises he’d made her. Promises he didn’t want to have to make but as the world changed, so did they. Adaptation and survival. He had agreed because she wanted him to. He did it for her. His queen._ **

**_“Fuck” He sniffed. A wave of anguish hitting him like a freight train. He dropped his head onto her stomach, sobs wracking his body._ **

**_“Please” the word leaves her mouth as almost a whisper but he hears it all the same. He can’t make her beg. He has to keep his promises. He looks up, but not at her. He can’t see her face while asking such a gut-churning question. His eyes fix on her hand, still clasped in his. Soon, it’ll be nothing but the hand of a ghost._ **

**_“Gun or knife?”_ **

**_“Gun”_ **

**_He reaches into his waistband for his pistol, withdrawing it and hauling himself up to sit on the bed beside her. Finally, he catches her eye. She already doesn’t look like herself. The festering poison of the virus coursing through her veins and changing her right in front of him. But she can still smile, and she does. A wide, beautiful smile that tugs at his heart and brings on another barrage of sobs. He leans forwards, his lips grazing hers before he gifts her with one, last kiss. A kiss he will never forget. A farewell._ **

**_“You’ve given me so much since I met you. Now, I just need one last thing from you. Your mercy. Please, end this for me.” She pleads._ **

**_He slowly sits back and lifts the gun to her forehead. The cold metal stings skin that feels paper thin._ **

**_“I love you, Daryl.” She affirms._ **

**_“I love you too, Faith.” He sniffs._ **

**_“Goodbye, my love.” She closes her eyes._ **

_**The trigger is pulled. The bullet leaves the chamber. With it, goes a large part of Daryl that he will never, ever be able to replace.** _

 

Now

Her brown eyes gazed at him as the light of the fire flicked on one side of her face. He always thought flames made everything look that little bit better. The glow, the warmth. But Not Lexie, she looked beautiful in any light, especially when she was sat so close to him and had listened to every word he had told her. She was still here.

He smiled briefly. “Remember when we sat here the first time, I said you reminded me of someone?”

“Yes.” She had been wondering ever since who he had been referring to but always felt like she would be prying if she asked.

“It was Faith. You look like her.”

Suddenly, it all made sense to Lexie. It was possible that he liked her because she looked like the woman he’d loved and lost, she was what he saw in his mind when he was looking at her. 

“I do?” She questioned.

“Yeah.”

Not knowing what to say, she looked down, avoiding his gaze and trying to ignore the raging disappointment in her heart. It wasn’t her he wanted. It was Faith. But despite that, she was still incredibly flattered that he thought she looked so much like someone he had obviously thought the world of.

“You’re still healing from your loss and I’m obviously just complicating things for you. Maybe we should just stay friends.” She suggested.

“Lexie…I meant what I said last night.” He told her. “I like you.”

Her disappointment gradually dissolved and happiness crept back to replace it. He had meant what he said but something in the back of Lexie’s mind probed and prodded, at her logical and sensible side and she tried to listen to her head and not her heart.

“Please don’t be offended, but I need to know if that is because I look like her?” She questioned with some hesitation.

“No. It’s ‘cause ya look like you. ‘cause you’re funny and smart and ya got Maggie to sit the hell down for once.” He replied, catching her eye.

She giggled quietly and felt her cheeks burn slightly at the compliments he had given her. Now, she had no idea what to say and became all too aware that she was just sat there smiling to herself like a loon. Daryl was watching her; the spark had returned to his eyes and his expression had softened. It suddenly dawned on Lexie that’s he hadn’t even thanked him for telling her something so personal and painful.

“Thank you for telling me. I know it must have been hard for you.” She whispered, her hand creeping closer to his. She wanted to take hold of it so badly.

“Wanted you to know why can’t rush into anythin’.” He uttered.

She decided from that point that because he had been so honest with her, it was now her turn to divulge some information that might help him understand why she didn’t want to rush either.

“OK, so I have something to tell you too” She started. “I um…haven’t ever had a relationship, boyfriend, whatever. I just…never met anyone I liked that much. So, I don’t have a clue what I’m doing and rushing really isn’t something I want to do either.”

“No one’s ever asked ya out on a date or nothin’?” He asked.

“Well, yes. A few times. I just wasn’t interested.” She answered, looking down into her lap and feeling extremely self-conscious.

For Lexie to have reached 34 years old and avoided having any kind of a romantic relationship was not exactly something she liked to make common knowledge. Mel had always told her how unusual it was and found her need to shroud her personal life in such secrecy strange and baffling. But Lexie had always maintained that it would take someone unique, someone special and someone she could trust that would be the first one she would ever agree to devote herself to and while she was no virgin, she was way out of her depth in every other aspect.

“But I’m interested now.” She whispered. “In you.”

He huffed and dipped his head, his hair cloaking his face form her. She could tell he was hiding a smile and she wished she could see it.

“So, ya never liked anyone, but ya like me?” He questioned, finally looking up. She noticed the dark pink shade his ears had turned, this was him blushing. She had made him blush. She wasn’t good at receiving compliments, let alone giving them to other people, but she had accepted more than one from him at this point and thought it was only right that she tries.

“Yeah. You make me laugh.” She grinned. “You listen to me, you’re brave and selfless. Then there’s um…god, I’m bad at this…you’re very attractive. There. I said it. I’m done.”

Daryl smiled shyly and reached forward, his fingertips traced over the back of her hand as she rested it on her knee.

_Oh my god._

“You don’t know how pretty you are.” He admitted.

_That’s it. He’s done it now. I’m hooked._

Lexie’s heart raced and her cheeks hummed with warmth as she tried to look up, tried to say thank you, only to find that she felt like she was about to burst and all that came out was a strange giggle. Thankfully, Daryl seemed to do the same. Then, Lexie remembered her and Mel being caught checking him out earlier in the day and hoped with everything she had that he had already forgotten about it.

Daryl couldn’t take his eyes away from her and he had already anticipated that his rapidly growing attraction to her was going to result in him having to make a conscious decision to keep things at a slow pace. He didn’t want to hurt her or scare her off and his unresolved grief from the loss of Faith was still fresh in his mind. However, she had done well so far to convince him that he had done the right thing in revealing to her what had happened. She had reacted with understanding and he had appreciated her own honesty in response, resulting in his feelings for her only being strengthened.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone for the comments as usual!

In the days that followed Lexie and Daryl’s heart to heart in the abandoned store, she had hardly seen him. He had been out for days on end with Aaron, signing guns out with Olivia for four-day blocks at a time. The search for other survivors to add to the community now the herd was headed away from Alexandria was in full force. She had gone about her daily business without a change, remaining her quiet self and avoiding Mel’s constant questioning about Daryl. She simply told her she hadn’t seen him much and she didn’t know when she would next. But underneath it all while going about her usual, mundane tasks, she would stop and switch to autopilot, her memories skipping through their previous conversations and she regularly thought of what he might be doing at that exact point.

When Lexie had finished a tower shift in the middle of the night, she had padded through her room, in and out of the bathroom dressed in a thin, black, tank top and a small pair of white shorts as she brushed her teeth. She hummed a soft tune to herself as she wandered past a row of candles on the dresser, the only light that was cast across the room.

Daryl stood outside the window on the back perch, darkness shrouding him and finding himself torn. He had climbed up there with the intention to check in with her, to let her know he was still around and was still thinking of her. But he had arrived to find her in a world of her own and she didn’t look as though she would appreciate being disturbed. So far, she hadn’t looked over at the window and he had gone unnoticed while he tried not to focus too much on the curved, yet toned lines of her body. Something else had caught his attention, what seemed to be thin scars across her thighs. He wondered if they were from before or after the turn but wasn’t about to ask. He had scars of his own that was less than happy to talk about. Despite this, he had noticed that she usually dressed in comfortable and tactical clothing that wasn’t always flattering, but now he could see that underneath, she was stunning.

Poe tiptoed across the roof towards him and jumped up on the window ledge in front of him.

“No…shhh” He hissed, willing the cat to stay quiet so he could creep away and avoid looking like some kind of night stalker. Poe peered up at him with wide eyes and everything seemed to happen in slow motion when the cat opened its mouth and emitted the loudest whine Daryl had ever heard from a Cat. He stepped back, away from the window and contemplated grabbing Poe and tossing him over the wall at the back of the house.

“Asshole” He whispered.

The window swung open and Lexie cooed at Poe, beckoning him over to her when she caught sight of Daryl, standing by the ladder.

“Daryl, hey” She addressed “You wanna use the perch?”

“Uh, naw. I came to see you. But I gotcha’ at a bad time. So Im’ma go’ He rambled.

“No, you haven’t, it’s fine. But it’s cold out here so come inside.” She coaxed, stepping back from the window far enough for him to climb in. Poe darted inside first and Lexie caught sight of herself in the mirror. Hair down and brushed, covering her shoulders, but her legs and arms were bare along with her chest due to her thin top. Her eyes darted around and she snatched a sweater from the bed, slipped it on and grabbed a blanket to cover her legs just as Daryl was closing the window behind him. She was flustered and was in the middle of tugging her hair from inside the sweater as she turned to face him, stopping and dropping her arms when she found herself right in front of him.

“Hi” She breathed.

“Hi” He whispered back, looking down at her slightly pink tinted cheeks.

“Long time no see.” She pointed out.

“Yeah, that’s kinda why I’m here. Wanted to check in.” He explained.

“OK” She uttered. _Was that Daryl speak for ‘I’ve missed you?’_ She took a couple of steps back and sat on the bed, bringing her still covered legs up under her and nodding her head at the empty space opposite her. He got the message and sat down, looking at her side on.

“It’s good to see you.” Lexie declared.

“You too.” He murmured. “I been real busy. Aint been avoiding ya or nothin’.”

Lexie felt extremely exposed and bashful, she slowly clambered back on the bed until she met the headboard and slipped her legs under the covers. She bit her bottom lip and glanced up at him, her head low.

“I didn’t think that.” She assured him.

“Headin’ out again tomorrow with Aaron. Steppin’ things up now the herds headed the other way, we got a lead we wanna check out. Might be another couple days before we’re back. Just givin’ ya a heads up.” He told her as he fiddled nervously with the creases in the blankets beside him. For once, he didn’t want to go out, he just wanted to spend some time with her. But he had a role in the community and Aaron was counting on him as well as Deanna.

“I’ll see you before you leave. I’m in the armoury in the morning.” She said.

Daryl sighed as if he was preparing himself for something. Then, he got up and moved closer, sitting back down right in front of her. He took hold of her wrist and turned it over, holding it in place on the covers. The warmth from his fingers made her fingertips tingle and her breathing became shallow and slow. His touch was electrifying and his eyes refused to leave hers. He shifted his hand, pulling it out from under hers and tickled over her tattoo with his middle finger. She suppressed a shiver at the sensation it created and, in that moment, was sure that she had never been more turned on by such a simple and quick touch before.

“Uh…” She stammered.

Daryl knew exactly what was going through her mind, because the same thing was going through his. He understood that neither of them was great with physical contact and having committed to a bold move and for a split second, he had worried that it might backfire and leave them both confused and embarrassed. But her reaction had been exactly what he wanted. He had seen her breathing change and her lips part. She liked it when he touched her.

“My tattoo. You want to know about my tattoo.” She said, almost to herself even though he was still studying her eyes.

“Yeah.” He rasped. His finger still very deliberately poised over the ‘Q’ on the Queen of Clubs symbol.

“W-well, when Mel’s mom first saw me in the hospital, with my broken arm, she said I was so well spoken for a kid that lived under the care of the state that she dubbed me a ‘Little Queen’. It’s kind of stuck. Then, she found out that card suits and numbers can correspond to personalities. Turns out, mine was spot on. So, I got the tattoo as reminder that she helped me find who I am.” She told him.

Daryl had now placed three fingertips on her wrist as she spoke and it had taken all her concentration to carry on with her explanation as if it hadn’t given her an almost uncontrollable urge to grab his hand and pull him towards her so she could kiss him.

“So, what’s the Queen of Clubs like?” He asked.

Lexie smiled to herself and quickly cleared her throat.

“She’s organised, creative. Has sharp mind, an even sharper tongue. She’s bright and she isn’t afraid of hard work. She likes to give orders and make rules, rather than follow them. But she will if she has to and she’s still sensitive and kind. She’s also a little indecisive when it comes to relationships, which means that she’ll be the one to hold off until she finds someone that’s able to handle her.”

She slowly stretched her fingers out under his hand, grazing across his wrist.

“She sound like someone you could get along with?” She added.

“Think I’m already gettin’ along with her.” He whispered.

Lexie wanted to slip her hand back slightly and wrap her fingers around his. To hold his hand properly, but she knew his reluctance to do that in the first place was for a reason. He was flirting with her, in his own, subtle way that meant he wasn’t going to charge in, all guns blazing with a grab of the hand and a few dirty one-liners. She was loving every single second of his way of doing things.

“Im’ma let ya get some sleep.” He informed her, dragging his hand back so slow that his fingers traced along the palm of her hand before the contact was gone. “See ya in the armoury in the mornin’.”

He got to his feet and stepped back, gaining a complete view of her. He didn’t want to leave. He wanted to curl up next to her and stay with her but he had to keep in mind that the urge to dive into things too quickly would complicated things and possible result in a disaster that he wanted to avoid.

 *****

Lexie had hardly slept that night, the sensation of Daryl’s touch on her wrist was still ever present every time she thought of it. She lay, wide awake with her hand on the pillow next to her until sunlight broke through the drapes.

She had risen earlier than she’d needed to, showered, dressed in black jeans and her Jack Daniels T-shirt and walked the silent street to the armoury. She unlocked the door and flicked the coffee machine on. A small luxury she had afforded herself in her ‘office’ that she let Olivia and Mel use when they took over from her. She ran her fingers through her wavy hair and tied it up into a messy bun before collecting her clipboard and beginning the morning count.

Aaron was the first to arrive and she wondered why he had practically thrown himself down the stairs and ran up to her, startling her enough for the coffee in her mug to slosh over the side and onto the floor.

“I’ve not seen you in so long. Daryl is on his way. Quick, give me gossip.” He demanded.

“Uuuuh…I-I don’t know where to start” She tried, feeling caught off guard and struggling to know what to say.

“OK, we have a matter of seconds. Question and answer round. Ready?” He proposed.

Lexie raised an eyebrow and gave him a worried look.

“O…K?” She agreed reluctantly.

“Have you had the ‘I like you’ talk?”

“Yes”

“He likes you?”

“Yes”

“Kissed?”

“No”

“Touched?”

“Yes, hands.”

“He’s complimented you?”

“Yes. Pretty.”

“Nice. OK, good, I’ve not missed the good stuff.”

“Aaron” Lexie said seriously “Please don’t tell anyone. Not even Mel. We’re taking this really slow, like one day at a time. She knows he likes me but that’s it.”

Aaron pushed his shirt sleeves further up his arms and grinned at her.

“My lips are sealed.” He assured her as he plucked a pistol from the shelving next to them and Daryl appeared in the doorway.

Lexie immediately felt her stomach flutter with the now all to familiar sensation of butterflies that emerged whenever she saw him. It made her feel like a teenager, or what she would have felt like as a teenager had she actually liked anyone. After flashing him a smile she pretended to carry on counting when really, she was just whispering random numbers under her breath. Aaron was writing in the ledger, signing out his gun and helping himself to Ammo.

As she glided to her left and tried to concentrate on counting the rifles, she felt a rush of air from behind her and saw a hand emerge from her right. Daryl reached out and took hold of the barrel of a rifle but didn’t dislodge it from its frame. He stood directly behind Lexie, not quite touching her but a mere hairs breadth away. She could feel his breath on her neck and collar bone while he considered whether or not to select the rifle in his grasp.

“Thinkin’ of takin’ this one.” He said, so close to her ear that the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end.

Aaron did a double take when he saw how close Daryl was to her, his hands poised over the box of ammo on the desk as he stared at what was possibly the most unexpected thing he had seen in a long time.

Lexie couldn’t help it. She closed her eyes and exhaled slowly as his breath still licked at her skin. Daryl wasn’t usually a flirter or one for teasing and since losing Faith, he felt like he had lost every scrap of game that she had ever taught him. But this had been too easily turned into something it was never intended to be in a matter of seconds, so he just went with it. Yes, he wasn’t rushing anything, but he wasn’t going to completely avoid her either. The presence of her best friend meant little to Daryl, Lexie wasn’t the kind of girl that broadcast her personal life around the town, so he was sure that she would shut down any ideas that Aaron had about telling anyone what he’d seen. What he had considered to be worth the risk, was the constant nudging and questions he was going to be faced with for the next two days when he and Aaron were alone outside the walls.

“What do ya think?” He continued.

The atmosphere around them was thick with tension and Lexie’s eyes sprang open and she took a deep breath.

“I think you’ll hit more with that than you will with a crossbow. Y’know, because it takes less skill and all.” She jested.

Daryl laughed quietly, his head dipping almost to the point where he was resting it against hers. When he raised it again, he pulled the gun from the frame, all the while keeping his eyes fixed on the side of her face. Her gaze was cast down, her lips parted and she blinked slowly.

“Queen of Clubs got attitude.” He whispered in her ear before he backed up and approached the desk.

She shook her head and followed him, rounding the desk and noticing that Aaron was hanging back at the rear of the room, faking choosing a knife when he already had one strapped to his belt. She sat down in front of Daryl and watched him sign the gun out. One of his hands sported various small tattoos, his fingers calloused, scarred but strong. While she was watching him, it occurred to her that he needed ammo.

_I’m shirking my duties because I’m too busy being a damn pervert._

She slid across the floor on the wheeled chair and opened the filing cabinet to collect him a box of rounds and he caught her eye when she handed them to him, his fingers gently ghosting over hers as he took the box from her.

“Aaron” Daryl suddenly said without even looking away from Lexie.

A loud clatter from behind them startled Lexie and she jumped slightly in her seat. Daryl glanced over his shoulder to see Aaron gingerly collecting a fallen knife from the floor, inches from his boot.

“Yes?” He said as causally as possible.

“Im’ma pack the truck. You know where we’re goin, mark the map.” Daryl instructed.

“Yeah, sure.” Aaron affirmed as he placed the knife back on the shelf.

Lexie was trying to hide a giggle at Aaron’s clumsiness and the fact that he almost took a blade to the foot purely because he was too busy watching her and Daryl from across the room.

Daryl picked up the box of rounds and gave Lexie a nod.

“Be safe.” She smiled. It was the same thing she said to him every time and he doubted he would get tired of hearing it.

“You got it.” He replied as he collected the gun from leaning against the desk and made his way up to the truck.

Aaron’s eyes widened as soon as Daryl left and Lexie braced herself for an onslaught of questions. She opened the drawer and unfolded the map on the table, holding out a red pen to him. He walked across the room with his arms outstretched and his hands open at her.

“What the hell was that?!” He asked, reaching the desk and ignoring her attempt to get him to take the pen.

“I don’t know” She groaned “Just mark the damn map, Aaron.”

He glanced down at the pen and snatched it from her hand, quickly marking a series of boxes before handing it back to her.

“That was the last thing I would have expected from him. He’s usually so…antisocial.” He mused.

“Good luck on your trip. Be safe.” She said in the hope that he would choose not to grill her and just be on his way.

Seemingly getting the message, Aaron held his hands up in surrender.

“OK, but you need to know that he didn’t even touch you and there was some serious sexual tension in here. I mean, I was almost suffocating in it over there.” He laughed.

Lexie threw the pen at him “Get out of here.”

 *****

Deanna was sat at her desk, engrossed in blueprints and plans to extend the walls and add more land for growing crops. So far, the vegetable patches and herb gardens that had been created were working well, they were just in need of more variety and more seeds. Her vision for Alexandria had been to build a whole, new, self-sustainable community that was able to thrive and carry on despite what threats lurked on the outside. She knew she had been a little naïve to think that the threat would never be able to get in, or that they would never lose anybody to it when they went on runs or recruiting. But so far, she had managed to keep a lot of people safe. Her only doubts now coming from overhearing conversations from the new group about how complacent the residents were and how they would have no idea how to fight if something terrible were to happen and the walls broke down. She tapped her pen on the page in front of her intermittently as she mulled over the situation in her head.

Hammering on the door made her jump and shock spiked through her before she got to her feet and walked to the front door. Through the glass panel, she could see Lexie. She pulled the door open and instantly noticed that she was fully suited up. A handgun and a knife strapped to each leg, a rifle slung over her shoulder, shin and elbow pads and a large bag positioned on her back. She had a determined but uneasy look on her face.

“Lexie, what’s wrong?” Deanna asked.

“Aaron and Daryl. When they checked their guns out, they noted in the ledger that it’d be for 48 hours. It’s been four days. They’re not back. I need you to agree to a search party.” She explained quickly, looking over her shoulder briefly at the people heading to their day jobs on the street.

“Come in” Deanna said, stepping aside.

Lexie accepted the invitation and moved into the house, Deanna closing the door behind her.

“I’m sure they’re fine” Deanna began “Aaron has been recruiting for us for a long time, he knows what to expect outside those walls and Daryl is extremely capable.”

Lexie sighed in irritation and began to pace back and forth in front of her, chewing on her thumb, then picking at her nail polish anxiously.

“I know Aaron is your good friend. But he is with Daryl and he will look out for him.” She added.

“It’s not just Aaron I’m worried about.” Lexie admitted, stopping in front of her and lowering her voice.

“Oh?” Deanna pressed

“Daryl and I, we’re close too. But in a different way.” She uttered.

Deanna’s face broke into a broad smile and she placed a hand on Lexie’s arm.

“That’s wonderful, Lexie.”

“I want to go and look for them.” She expressed. “I need a search party.”

“You know the rule is three days past the estimated arrival date. You chose that rule. I cannot say yes to this and no to everyone else if it happens to them.” Deanna told her. “Give them one more day and if they’re not back you can go, but you will take somebody with you who knows the outside, like Michonne, Abraham or Glenn.”

She heard footsteps on the stairs behind her and knew without even having to look that it was Spencer. Deanna’s eyes flickered up to him before returning to her.

“Fine.” Lexie spat, hauling the door open and charging outside.

Deanna turned to Spencer.

“She’s going to try and leave. Stop her.” She instructed.

Spencer thudded down the stairs and to the door. “Yes, mother.”

 

Lexie headed straight for the gate, which was being watched by Eugene. She considered this handy seeing as he was more than aware that he had a huge crush on her and would probably move heaven and earth for her judging by the way he spent most of his days looking her way. She stuck out a hand and rotated it quickly, signalling that she wanted the gate opened, Eugene didn’t hesitate and jumped at the chance to pull back the massive dead bolt. As he was about to pull the gates back, Spencer stepped in front of Lexie, blocking the way and holding a hand up to Eugene.

“Stop. Close the gate. Now.” He barked.

Eugene spun on his heels and closed the gate, asking no questions. Lexie glared up at Spencer.

“Get out of the way.” She ordered.

“No can do. You’re not allowed to leave.” He told her.

“Step aside Spencer, I’m going.”

“No, you’re not. If you try, I’ll have to throw you in the cell.”

Lexie slugged the rifle from her shoulder, checked the round, clicked the bolt back into place and pointed it between his legs. Spencer stepped back slightly, his sightline now directed right at the gun’s barrel. Eugene began waving frantically at someone behind her, but Lexie was concentrating on one thing only.

“Fuck you, you’re not throwing me in the cell. If you don’t step aside, I’m going to blow your little soldier to kingdom come and that’ll serve two purposes; you’ll be indisposed and I’ll be able to leave and you won’t be able to fuck my sister anymore.” She raged.

“I feel special, that’s the most you’ve ever said to me. But I’m not letting you leave.” Spencer declared.  

“Lex” said a soft voice from beside her. Mel. She could hear other voices too, more people arriving. Carol, Maggie, Rick.

“Lex, give me the gun.” Mel tried. Lexie’s eyes gradually moved to her right to see Mel stood right next to her, her hand held out near the rifle. “No one’s shooting anyone. Give me the gun.”

“I have to go and look for them. They’re-they’re late.” Lexie stammered.

“I’m worried too. Aaron told me two days. But it’s only been four and they have one more day before we can go look for them. It’s three days past, remember? Just wait one more day. They’ll be back, you’ll see. You’re making a scene.” She told her.

Lexie glanced around her, to the people that had now stopped as they passed and were observing her pointing a gun and the son of the town’s leader. Shame washed over her and she buckled, handing the gun to Mel and leaning forwards with her hands on her knees. She heard the gate lock in front of her and felt Mel lace her arm around her.

“C’mon, let’s get you back to the house.” Mel cooed

Mel had checked the guns back in while Lexie had stormed back to the house and locked herself in her bedroom where she stayed for the next two hours. Mel had sat on the other side, shoving chunks of candy under the door which Lexie gratefully took each time as she sat cross legged in front of it on the inside. Mel had asked why she had lost her cool and tried to leave like that and Lexie had just expressed that she was worried for both of them, not thinking that they had overstayed outside the walls before and Lexie showed little to no concern then. But things had changed now. Mel had politely reminded her that it had been a regular occurrence and received nothing in response. A sign that Lexie wasn’t even sure what the answer was herself and was become more and more accepting of the fact that she was losing her mind.

 Eventually, Mel moved away from the door and Lexie opened it, asking if they could just forget the whole thing and suggesting that she might just be feeling a little unhinged and down and it had presented its self in a dramatic way. Mel smiled, kissed her on the cheek and bounced off down the stairs to make dinner. Lexie knew people would be talking about her little stunt and that it was only a matter of time before it got back to Daryl, if he ever returned. She told herself she would cross that bridge when she came to it and that her main priority now should be distracting herself to avoid any more humiliating scenes.

 *****

She spent the rest of the afternoon on the front perch in the sun, listening to music and sketching Daryl’s bike which he had left outside the house next door. She looked up when the gate opened and her breath hitched when she saw them. Aaron and Daryl drove through and parked outside Deanna’s place. People started to gather and Lexie could see Rick and Michonne along with Carol, who had left the house and was wandering along the street alone. Aaron spoke to Deanna briefly on the front porch of her house while Daryl removed two large bags from the back of the truck.

Lexie got up and climbed back through the window to her room. She darted through the house to find the front door already open and Mel jogging down the street towards Aaron. She padded along slowly, seeing Aaron pick Mel up and spin her around while Carol gave Daryl a quick hug. Lexie wrapped her arms around herself and continued slowly towards the group. Aaron looked up as Mel rambled on to him about everything he’d missed and caught sight of Lexie.

“Daryl” He called out as low key as possible.

Daryl looked over his shoulder to see Aaron nod up in Lexie’s direction. He followed his gaze and started towards her as soon as his eyes fell on her. He kept a casual pace, not wanting anyone to notice how pleased he was to see her. She stopped a couple of feet away from him, still hugging herself and her eyes darting everywhere but on him.

“Hey” He said.

“Hi.” She replied. “Are you OK?”

His clothes were caked in dirt and blood which was dark and probably not his due to the colour of it. He looked like he’d been to hell and back.

“Yeah, I’m good. You?”

“Yeah, glad you’re back.” She smiled half-heartedly, her gaze still averted. Then, she skirted around him and broke into a jog when she spotted Aaron. Daryl stood, motionless and witnessed her fling her arms around him and crash into his embrace. He laughed heartily as he clamped his arms around her waist and lifted her momentarily from the floor.

“Hey, missed you too, Lex!” He chuckled.

“I’m glad you’re safe.” She whispered into the crook of his neck before letting go.

“We got into a little trouble, but Daryl handled it.” Aaron told her “I’d be dead if it wasn’t for him”

Lexie’s heart sank at the prospect of Aaron possibly being killed. She was under no illusions that recruiting was extremely dangerous, but she had somehow managed to sugar coat it for herself, making the fact that her best friend constantly put himself in harms way an easier pill to swallow. She wanted to turn around and thank Daryl, she wanted to hug him too. But she felt too out of her depth and her emotions were a mess. She needed to remove herself from the situation.

“I gotta get home, I’m exhausted.” Aaron sighed, almost reading her mind.

“OK, we’ll catch up at some point.” She agreed as she backed up and held up her hand in a small farewell gesture. As she turned to head back to her house, Daryl was stood off to the side of her. She walked straight past him, not looking at him once and concentrated on placing herself firmly behind the walls of her house so she could collect her thoughts and try and push down the irritation that bubbled in her chest. Mel ran after her, trailing along beside her and asking what was wrong. But Lexie merely glanced from her sister to the front door and kept on walking until she met it. After charging inside, she slammed the door behind her and balled her hands into fists at her sides.

“What’s gotten into you?!” Mel demanded “they’re back! They’re fine! You should be happy but instead you’re charging around like someone shit on your cereal!”

“This is why I never did it.” Lexie snapped.

“Did what?”

“The relationship thing!” She shouted, her arm flying up and gesturing wildly in the air. It occurred to her that she had now said too much and would have to come clean to Mel about her situation with Daryl and once the words started emerging, she tried and failed to stop them.

“We like each other, we had the talk. But he’s going through some stuff and I may as well be a nun so it’s complicated and now… now I think about him a lot and it’s making me do crazy things like threatening to shoot Spencer in the penis at the gate and I’m just so mad, Mel! I’m mad because he was gone longer than he said he would be and I’m mad because I…because…”

“Because you care about him.” Mel said softly.

“Yes! And I kind of wish I didn’t right now” Lexie admitted.

“You don’t mean that.” Mel corrected.

“I don’t know what the hell I mean or don’t mean anymore. I’ve been acting like I’ve lost my fucking mind.” She seethed as she stormed off to the stairs. Mel sighed deeply to herself as she watched her sister thud up the stairs and toyed with the idea of following her. But she decided against it when she heard the bedroom door slam.

 *****

Lexie climbed out onto the back perch and sat in the middle, hugging her knees. Poe trotted over from the corner and let out a shrill meow. She tickled along his back, her hand being pushed up when he dipped his body and raised his tail as she reached the base of his spine. She flipped her hood up and resumed her embrace of her legs, burying her face in her knees.

She was confused and irritated. She had never cared about anyone but her family and until she arrived at Alexandria, Aaron and Eric too. To care about people was to allow herself to be at their mercy, to risk being hurt when they left and abandoned her. So, she had distanced herself from everyone altogether. She had certainly never felt the niggling pull of worry when anyone else had gone over the wall and not returned for such a long time. She never expected to feel anything for Daryl when she’d first seen him at the gun store, let alone to find herself so out of sorts at his absence. Yet, here she was completely consumed by the anxiety of having to face her actions at the gate earlier and dealing with the fact that she could think of nothing but Daryl while he was gone.

Footsteps on the ladder. She huffed. _He’s here. You’re going to have to speak to him._ While she couldn’t deny she wanted to see him, at the same time she also wanted to hide on her perch and not face anyone. When he appeared next to her, shrugged off his bag and quietly sat down, she could feel him staring at her, his eyes roaming over the side of her face as she gazed out at the horizon, refusing to look at him.

“You mad at me or somethin’?” He questioned.

She could see the blood that was smeared over his cheek and arms from her peripheral vision and hoped with everything she had that he hadn’t been injured at all. She pushed her hood back down.

“No” She said simply.

“Then what’s up with the cold shoulder?” He continued.

“I’m talking to you, aren’t I?” She snapped.

“Wouldn’t even look at me down there. Don’t exactly seem happy to see me, but alright.” He mumbled as he drew his legs up and crossed them at the ankles. He draped his arms over his knees and looked to the side for her reaction. He waited patiently when he saw her exhale slowly and close her eyes.

“I’m not mad at you.” She confirmed. “I’m mad at myself.”

Daryl realised he was going to have to proceed with some caution, having never seen her like this before.

“OK, why?” He pressed.

She cleared her throat and laced her fingers into her hair, stopping them halfway and cradling her head as she peered down into her lap.

“I panicked.” She admitted. “When you and Aaron didn’t come back after 48 hours. I panicked.” She lifted her head and removed her hands, her shiny hair resting on her shoulder. She still hadn’t stolen a glimpse of him. “I wanted to go look for you. So, I asked Deanna but she said no. There’s a three day past the deadline rule. But I tried anyway and she sent Spencer to stop me. I pointed a rifle at him. I was going to shoot him. I almost got thrown in the Cell.”

A moment of silence followed while Daryl replayed what she had told him over in his head.

“Oh.” He grunted.

“I have this problem….” She carried on “…I care about you.”

He saw her face fall when the words left her mouth, as if she had admitted to some kind of huge weakness that she didn’t quite understand.

“Hey” He whispered, urging her to look at him. When she didn’t, he shifted closer to her, feeling the need to disclose what had happened to make him so late returning back to Alexandria.

“We followed a guy until it got dark, but we lost him. Found a house and set up camp. In the morning, the place was surrounded by Walkers. We had to wait it out. Eventually, we took our chances and fought our way outta there.” He told her. He knew she was listening, but she had not graced him with a glimpse yet. “Hey” He repeated, louder this time.

Finally, her eyes crept around to land on him. The blood wasn’t just smeared on his cheek, it was across his forehead and dried on his neck too. She thought he looked like he could use around twelve hours of sleep.

“M’sorry.” He said sincerely.

“Don’t” She responded, shaking her head. “Don’t do that. It’s not your fault. Ignore me, I’m being…weird.” She looked away again, conscious of how clingy and strange she must seem.  She considered a number of different things to try and correct the situation. One of which was to claim she was drunk or delusional for some reason. But instead, she allowed a few minutes to pass while they sat in silence and wished she had some kind of device that could erase the last hour of Daryl’s memory.

“Y’know…” Daryl eventually said. “…If it was you out there, I’d have shot Spencer.”

Lexie tried not to seem too stunned at his comment, but she failed to mask her shock completely. Her head snapped to the side a little too quickly, she said nothing, her expression saying it all.

_Really?!_

“Care about you too.” He confessed. “Thought about you, while I was out there.”

“You did, huh?” She asked, a smile ghosting her lips.

He briefly looked out over the trees, smirking to himself and hoping that his hair was hiding it. A simple nod was her confirmation and her stomach fluttered. The same excited, buzz that he always seemed to give her. A flock of birds passed overhead, their small bodies silhouetted in the dusk light. Daryl and Lexie both looked up and witnessed them dart behind the line of the roof behind them. Lexie let her legs fall flat on the roof’s surface and sighed quietly.

“I’m not used to caring. I’m sorry. I was happy to see you. I am…happy to see you.” She explained.

“Don’t worry about it.” He dismissed.

She caught his eye and noticed how uncomfortable he suddenly looked, he fidgeted and absent-mindedly picked at a frayed part of his jeans where a red patch had been sewed across a hole in the knees. Minutes passed and he stayed quiet. She began to worry that she had been the one to have brought on his unnerved display, when he finally spoke.

“I got ya somethin’.” He said, so quietly that if she’d moved and simply dragged a boot across the roof she would have missed it.

“What?” She asked.

He reached to his side, dragging his bag closer to him and unclipped it, shoving his hand inside. He removed a dark coloured item and held it by his side, out of reach of her vision. He quickly looked at her and began nibbling on his bottom lip. He wordlessly passed her the item. She held out a hand and stared at what he had placed in her palm. A black, leather wrap that was fastened with string. She plucked at the bow an unravelled it to reveal a row of perfectly kept and sharpened pencils. Her breath hitched in her throat at such a thoughtful gesture and she looked up at Daryl, who was regarding her with a nervous stare.

“The house was full of art supplies. I didn’t know what ya would have used. So, I just picked these up on the way out. I seen ya usin’ the same ones. If ya don’t want ‘em I can give ‘em to the kids or somethin’.”

“No.” She blurted out. “I mean… Do you know why I draw, Daryl? “she asked, receiving a slow shake of his head in reply.

“I was offered a prestigious art scholarship when I was in high school. I turned it down, because I wanted to stay with Mel. I ended up in community college. I never told anyone that I had an opportunity to make something else out of myself. When I draw, no matter where I wander, I feel like me. I’m a better sketcher than I am a talker, that’s for sure and I don’t draw what I see, I draw how it makes me feel. So, the reason why is because It gives me my life back. Even just momentarily.”

Daryl nodded slowly at her, his eyes locked with hers, fascinated by her take on it. She was telling him that he’d just handed her the perfect escape from everything. The path to feeling like herself when everything around her didn’t make sense anymore.

“Thank you. Daryl. This means a lot to me.” She said, offering him a genuine and wide smile.

“No problem. If I ever go back there, I’ll get ya some more stuff. Or maybe it’ll be safe to take ya there one day.” He suggested.  

“I’d like that.” She grinned, clutching her gift tightly in her hand. She wanted to lean towards him, to drape her arms around his neck and kiss his cheek with gratitude but didn’t want to push her luck. Instead, she opted for a gentle squeeze of his forearm where there wasn’t any dried blood. His eyes darted down to where their skin connected and she could hear his breathing become slightly louder. Under her hand, his muscles went taut but all Lexie focused on was how much she wanted him to let her keep her hand where it was. She felt him stir and shift closer to her but decided she had already been allowed more than she’d bargained for, a few precious seconds until she lifted her hand away.

Daryl missed the contact as soon as it was taken away from him. The tingly patch of skin where her hand had been was now cold and noticeable. He was always apprehensive at first, taking his time to get used to it. But once he was, he didn’t want it to end. He had always been wary of being touched by anyone, having to place some serious trust in a person before he would let them within arms reach, but with Lexie it seemed easier. Like it was with Faith.

“You know I’m still not going to let you see my drawings though, right?” She confirmed.

“You will.” He challenged. “One day.”

 

Daryl had stayed for another hour in Lexie’s company before she told him to go home and get a shower. The crusted blood on his face, arms and neck was beginning to get a little disgusting and she could literally smell the Walkers that he’d killed. When he’d started to descend the ladder, bag slung over his back with his crossbow, Lexie had got up and tenderly but briefly touched his fingers as they grasped the top of the ladder. He had completely frozen and stared up at her.

“Thank you for saving my best friend. Aaron told me he owes you his life.” She told him.

“Ahh he was alright. Didn’t really need me.” He shrugged.

“Daryl. Aaron doesn’t lie. Nor does he exaggerate.” She shot back.

He remembered back to when they had made a run for it. Daryl leading from the front, Lexie’s gift shoved into the pocket of his pants from where he had doubled back at the last minute, not wanting to leave without it. He picked off the Walkers in front of him with his crossbow, Aaron making use of a Machete on any that approached from the rear. A stumble from behind resulted in Daryl quickly glancing behind him and seeing Aaron sprawled out on the floor, his legs being tugged at by a Walker whose teeth were gnashing wildly at the denim of his jeans. He kicked out frantically and swung his blade up at another Walker who had appeared at his side and lunged down at him. He sliced it’s head in half as Daryl instinctively raised his crossbow and eliminated the Walker that was scratching at his legs. Aaron took a moment to catch his breath and gratefully accepted Daryl’s hand which aided in him being hauled to his feet. He nodded a quiet thanks at Daryl, who shrugged one arm up as if it were nothing and carried on along his path to the truck, firing off bolts any any close threats.

“S’fine. Nothin’ he wouldn’t have done for anybody else.” Daryl mumbled at Lexie.

“You’re a good person.” She whispered.

He hadn’t considered himself to be much of a good person since losing Faith. A large part of who he had become being snatched away when she had died. He had tired with everything in him to make the right choices, to save as many people as he could. But sometimes, he felt the weight of each death the group had encountered on his shoulders. When Lexie had spoken with sincerity and a true belief that she knew who he was, he hoped she was right and wasn’t about to tell her otherwise.

 *****

Mel hated doing armoury shifts alone. She liked to chat and conversate with people that came and went so quickly throughout the day was difficult. Unlike Lexie, her concentration wasn’t held by the monotony of the daily tasks or by reading. So, she constantly found herself sat outside, looking for someone to converse with and hoping that Aaron or Eric would stop by with some food. So far that morning, she had seen one person. Abraham. He had visited to check out a gun so he could head to the quarry and carry on working to remove everything that was left behind. Mel’s eyebrow had risen when he’d wandered in wearing a white vest and army pants. He was a considerable unit of a man, tall and wide and with an impressive array of facial hair. Mel thought she could handle that and so flirted shamelessly with him while he lapped up every single second. When he’d left, everything fell back to deafening silence again and she huffed so dramatically as she sat on the wall outside that her blonde bangs blew up into the air above her.

Daryl appeared at the end of the street, walking towards her with a smoke in one hand and the other pushed into his jeans pocket. His leather vest clapped in the days warm breeze and his hair hung over his eyes so Mel could t even tell if he’d noticed her.

“Morning!” She sang out at him.

He almost stopped on the sidewalk at her high pitched and sudden greeting. Without a care, he flicked his cigarette into the street.

“Hey.” He grumbled back, eventually coming to a stop in front of her. She stood up from her seat on the wall and attempted to see past his hair and into his eyes but to no avail. This morning he was shady and intended to stay that way.

“I’ve not seen Lexie since you got back yesterday.” Mel told him “have you?”

“Yeah, tracked her down for a while in the evenin’.” He replied, reaching up and scratching at the back of his neck.

“Is she OK?” Mel probed.

“Yeah, she’s alright.” He nodded.

“She freaked out on you, huh?” Mel asked cautiously.

“Yeah, a little” He divulged, wary of giving away too much information that could potentially embarrass Lexie.

Mel smiled knowingly and leaned back on the wall, nudging her head up at the space next to her. Daryl got the hint and took up a spot on the spare end of the wall beside her. The sun beat down on his back and shoulders, his black leather vest only holding the heat.

“Lexie was given up by her mother when she was a kid. Since then, she’s not wanted to get close to anyone in case they give her up too, or abandon her. She doesn’t trust very easily and she can be a little… difficult to bond with sometimes. She’s going to be kind of weird every now and then because she’s never had this kind of mutual attraction before. She’s learning. But once she lets you in and you bash down the wall she builds around herself, she’s amazing.” Mel reasoned.

Daryl had no doubt about that. It was one of many reasons he found himself drawn to her. She was different, interesting and it wasn’t easy to get to under the protective layers she had built up. But he was getting somewhere with her and he knew he was lucky enough to already be chipping away at it.

“I get it. I ain’t in no rush.” He affirmed.

“You really like her?” Mel asked directly, not shying away from finding out exactly what she wanted to know. Daryl glanced up comfortably and wished people would stop asking him awkward and person questions as if it were nothing.

“Yeah.” He grumbled, standing up straight and turning to continue on his route down the sidewalk. Mel stuck a leg out in front of him, stopping him from leaving.

“Just a minute there, buddy. I’m not done with you yet. There’s more you need to know.” She warned, positioning herself so she was right in front of him.

“Lex has never been short of attention from the opposite sex. Hell, even the same sex at times. She’s always just shrugged it off and ignored it. But she’s beautiful so it’s never been a surprise to me that she’s actually had more genuine interest than I have.” She started.

Daryl nodded in agreement. She may look like Faith, but she was beautiful in her own right.

“But she’s super shy and quiet and she will only let you see what she wants you to see. Under those ugly, baggy ass clothes of hers, she’s got a body I would murder for and make no mistake, if you push her too far too soon or you hurt her, you will see her wrath. I mean, she was going to shoot Spencer in the dick yesterday. That’s says it all. Don’t fuck with her, she’s a complete savage when she wants to be and so am I.”

“I don’t say stuff I don’t mean.” Daryl told her.

“Well, good. Keep it that way. Look, I don’t mean to bombard you with warnings like this. It’s just, she’s my sister and I love her and I don’t want to see her get hurt or she will clam up in her shell again. I just want her to have what I never did. The experience of being with someone that adores her for who she is and nothing else.” Mel admitted.

“You done?” Daryl asked curtly.

“Yes. I’m done.”

He skirted around her, stepping into the road and walking on. When he was around four feet away, he stopped and looked back at Mel who had her head raised to the sky and her eyes shut with her hands tapping in irritation at the sides of her jeans.

“Hey” he called out. She opened her eyes and lowered her gaze at him.

“The drawings she does, ya ever seen ‘em?” He wanted to know.

Mel pursed her lips while she weighed up how honest to be.

“Between you and I, I might have taken a little peek on a couple of occasions.” She smiled.

“She good?”

Mel’s smile grew wider until she was flashing him a pure white, perfectly lined grin.

“She’s incredible” she beamed.

Daryl couldn’t help but half heartedly return her smile for a fleeting moment while he thought of the possible talent that Lexie was so keen to hide away from the world in her sketchbook. He wanted to respect her wishes and let it go, accept the fact that he would never see any of it, but the desire to persevere and reap the rewards if she finally gave in was too much. While nibbling his lip, he played with the edge of his vest with one hand, thumbing the seam.

“She’s different. She’s smart and she don’t ever try to be nothin’ she ain’t. Except when it’s to make you happy. She’s funny and yeah, she’s a fine lookin' girl but I spend so much time with her because she’s good with who she is and she lets me be who I am. So, yeah. I do really like her n’ I ain’t got no plans to hurt her. That’s why there ain’t no rush. Alright?”

Mel was giving him an appreciative look that seemed to be laced with a hint of sadness at her own lack of someone who saw her in the same way.

“Alright.” She agreed. “That’s what I wanted to hear. Thank you.”

Daryl tilted his head up in a quick farewell gesture and turned on his heels, leaving Mel to think about how the tables had turned. How Lexie now had someone that not only liked her, but she felt the same about. Someone that had the best of intentions and treated her with respect. Someone that had the decency to stop in passing and assure her sister that he wasn’t out to hurt her and that the things he liked about her, were the things she had wanted the previous men she’d fallen for to see in her, if only she’d picked the right ones.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a short one, but I enjoyed writing this one :)

While Mel was at the armoury, Lexie had the day and the night off and spent the morning tidying the house and collectively dumping all of Mel’s cast off stuff onto a blanket in the middle of the living room before gathering the edges and dumping it upstairs on her bed. When she returned to the lower level, she hummed a tune to herself as she entered the kitchen and stopped when the scent of lasagne hit her nose. On the kitchen island sat a glass dish, covered over with foil and with a note on the top.

_Vegetable lasagne. I made it for next door. Carol gave me the recipe and I decided to try it. Please deliver it while I’m working. Mel x_

Lexie grumbled a string of obscenities to herself at the thought of Mel forcing her to go and socialise with the neighbours. She always said she understood Lexie’s hatred for small talk and awkward social graces, yet every now and again she would put her in a situation that she was unable to say no to.

As tempting as it was to sit and eat the entire thing to herself and then claim she had no knowledge of it, Lexie made the reluctant decision to get changed and fulfil her sisters wishes.

 *****

Her boots sank into the green, grassy path as she crossed the space in between the houses, lasagne in hand. Her baggy, black, Guns N' Roses vest flapped in the breeze and she could feel the braid at the back of her head slowly working its way loose. She paused, surveying the house before proceeding and hoping to be able to catch some kind of idea of how many people she may have to contend with once she’d knocked on the door. Unable to see any movement in the windows, she prayed that no one would be in but figured it was unlikely, it was 10am in the morning and for some strange reason, Mel had cooked a lasagna.

She walked quietly up to the door and took a deep breath, knocking on the surface with one hand. A quick scan of the street behind her revealed a few people ambling along, some chatting outside their homes and the gate guards, indulging in what appeared to be some playful banter. The door opened and she whirled back around to see Rick in front of her, his uniformed shirt partially unbuttoned as if she had caught him in the middle of getting dressed.

“Good morning.” He greeted, a little surprised at her presence.

“Hi” She squeaked as she held up the dish. “Lasagne.”

Rick regarded her with an air of total confusion, not expecting to be faced with the hermit from next door turning up on his porch with an Italian dinner first thing in the morning. Lexie noticed his baffled expression and realised how strange she must have sounded.

“I mean, Mel made you guys a lasagne. Asked me to bring it over.” She said a little more coherently.

“Oh, that’s kind of her” Rick responded as he stepped aside. “Come in”

“N-no that’s OK, I just-“Lexie protested

“-please, come in.” He pressed.

Not wanting to come across as rude, Lexie reluctantly agreed and stepped inside the house. The already awkward and heavy prospect of small talk bothering her. She thought Rick must have noticed too as he walked further down the hall and stood by the doorway to the living room. Lexie tentatively stepped closer and followed his gaze, seeing Carl sat with little Judith on the couch, taking her through a picture book about animals. He looked up and waved politely at Lexie, who held up a hand in return.

“How are you?” Rick asked “you didn’t seem too happy at the gate the last time I saw you.”

 _Great_ she thought. He world and his wife had witnessed the scene she had made with the rifle and it wouldn’t take long for them all to figure out why she had acted in such an extreme way.

“I’m fine. I was just angry.” She lied.

“Hey, I understand. We’ve all wanted to shoot Spencer at some point.” He offered.

She thoughtfully tilted her head to the side and raised an eyebrow “true.”

“So, Daryl tells me you worked at a gun store” he commented.

Lexie’s back prickled _Daryl tells you about me?_

“Yes.” She nodded “My father’s business.”

“Good things to know your way around in the apocalypse, guns.” He smiled.

“Yeah.” She agreed, seeing an opportunity that she would only be able to seize if she made more of an effort with the conversation. “That Colt Python you brought in. You mind if I try it out one day?”

“You like Pythons?” He asked, surprised.

“I wouldn’t go that far. Cops stopped carrying revolvers in the nineties. I've not seen many in my life. It’s got a nice big hammer spur and a smooth trigger, but it’s a little arrogant for a Walker killer gun for the times we live in. Still, it’s pretty nonetheless.”

Rick chuckled at Lexie’s blasé and critical attitude towards his firearm of choice,  impressed by her knowledge and fearless expression of her opinion.

“Arrogant, Huh?” He grinned.

“No offence.” She shrugged.

“Sure you can try it out. Be careful though, we don’t want you getting ‘arrogant’ now, do we?” He jested.

Thudding from the stairs caught her attention and she saw Daryl barrel his way down to the bottom and lean his crossbow against the hallway table. He caught sight of her when he glanced up and his face instantly softened into a slight smile.

“Hey” He rasped. “What ya doin’ here?”

Lexie looked down at the dish that was still in her hand and it occurred to her that Rick had made no attempt to take it from her.

“Hi” She said quietly, unable to stop the shy but excited smile on her face.

“I thought I could hear voices” Carol announced as she wandered out from the kitchen “Hello, Lexie! What’s this?” She asked, peering down at the foil.

“Lasagne” Lexie stated as she offered Carol the dish. _Please, take it._

Carol removed the lasagne from Lexie’s hands so quickly that she thought she’d actually dropped it for a moment.

“She gave it a try!” She exclaimed “I gave her this recipe, a lot of substitutes… you know. But it looks like it turned out well! You want some coffee, Lexie?”

“Uh… I should-“ she went to reply before catching Daryl’s eye. He was looking down his nose at her and he may as well have had a neon sign above his head that read ‘you want coffee. Stay.’

“Yes please, Carol.” She called out.

Rick looked back and forth between them, noticing Daryl’s shy smile at Lexie’s acceptance of Carols offer purely so she could be around him. Judith made animal noises one by one in the living room every time Carl pointed to a farm animal in the book, which made for a happy sound. 

“I better get going.” Rick announced as he walked over to Carl and Judith and gave the toddler a kiss on the cheek.

Lexie could feel Daryl staring at her as she watched Judith throw her tiny hands in the air and giggle with such enthusiasm that she wished she could find something in life that provoked such a response in her too.

As he passed Daryl, Rick gently pat his back and wordlessly left the house. The noise of cupboards and drawers being opened and closed from the kitchen played out as a kind of background noise as Daryl and Lexie stared at one another in the hall.

“What?” She managed to ask.

“Nothin’.” He mumbled, shaking his head.

Lexie side stepped closer to the living room and decided to head inside, lured by the gentle giggles and murmurs of Judith. Carl looked up and smiled at her.

“Take a seat” he offered, nodding to the armchair opposite them. Daryl was shocked to see her sit down next to Carl and gently take hold of Judith’s hand. Carl’s eyes flickered up to Daryl, who was now stood in the doorway, flummoxed by her interest in the small child. His eyebrows were pinched together and he could only shrug back at Carl. _Don’t ask me, I got nothin’ here._

“Can I hold her?” Lexie asked Carl.

“Yeah, sure” he agreed, hooking his hands under Judith’s arms and hoisting her into Lexie’s Lap. She balanced Judith comfortably on both of her legs and took the farm animal book from Carl.

“She likes the horses. Because they have so many colours.” Carl told her.

Lexie slid a hand around Judith’s front to steady her, the podgy, warm shape in her grasp making her want to snuggle into her and hug her tightly. She smelt like flowers and baby shampoo. 

“She likes colours?” Lexie asked.

“Yeah. And birds.” Carl added.

Daryl was now leaning against the doorframe. His arms crossed in front of him and with Carol next to him who was silently gawping at the sight, stunned that Lexie had been so bold as to decide to bond with the child. 

Lexie opened the book in front of Judith and let her take hold of the edges of the pages with her fingers. She immediately began to chatter and smile to herself.

“You like birds?” Lexie cooed “which ones do you like? Show me”

Judith’s hand shot out and she pointed to a large, brown Chicken in the forefront of the image. Lexie continued to whisper in her ear, making her chirp and attempt to say certain words. Carl laughed from beside them as Lexie began to bounce her knees up and down and sing to her in a beautifully tuneful voice.

“I wasn’t expecting this. So sweet” Carol uttered from Daryl’s side.

“Yeah.” He replied, his vision firmly planted on Lexie. Seeing her being so playful and gentle with a child was like seeing a completely different side to her altogether. He realised there and then that Mel was right. She only showed him the aspects of her that she wanted him to see. If he wanted to witness more of the real Lexie, it was going to take more time.

“I’ll put your coffee on the table.” Carol called out.

“Thank you” Lexie smiled. She handed the book to Carl and picked Judith up, turning her around and hugging her against her side while she stood up. The whole thing seemed effortless to Daryl, as if she’d done it a million times before. She slowly padded around the room tickling Judith’s nose and singing to her so quietly Daryl couldn’t quite hear the tune from where he was. Until she stopped at the window.

_and if that Mockingbird don’t sing, Lexie’s gonna buy you a diamond ring._

After giggling her way through the entire song, Judith was eventually handed back to Carl despite her constantly reaching back out to Lexie, who had picked up her coffee and was sipping it gingerly in front of Daryl and Carol.

“You like children.” Carol stated.

“I just appreciate them.” Lexie corrected 

“Well, she is very taken with you.” Carol beamed, noticing that Judith was still reaching out at Lexie.

“She’s a cutie.” Lexie confirmed.

“She is. Anyway, If you’ll excuse me I have to go down to the pantry.” Carol announced. 

Lexie nodded a polite goodbye and Daryl waited for her to leave before he stepped closer.

“Goin’ out.” He mumbled, hoping that Carl couldn’t hear him. “Come with me.”

It was more of an order than a question and Lexie realised that she didn’t dislike it. She gulped her coffee down and placed her mug back on the table before she stepped further out into the hall. He followed, distancing them from Carl and Judith.

“No ‘do you want to come with me?’ Or ‘please will you come with me?’ You’re just ordering me around now?” She questioned, offering him a flirtatious smile.

“Uh…no. I…” He stammered, looking completely confused.

“Daryl.” She said sternly.

“Yeah?”

“I’m just kidding.” She giggled.

“Oh. Right.” He huffed awkwardly.

“Where are you going?” She asked, receiving a subtle shrug in return.

“Deanna gave Glenn a list of stuff she wants picking up on runs. Aaron said there used to be a Mall about thirty miles east. Was gonna get the list and check it out.” He explained.

“OK. I’ll come with you. Mr. Bossy.” She beamed.

Daryl sucked his bottom lip into his mouth and held it there. She knew he was doing this to hide a smile so considered her mildly flirtatious and playful effort a success.

 *****

Hoping to be returning with supplies, they had opted for a car for the journey. Much to her relief, Lexie had managed to avoid Mel in the armoury when Daryl had offered to check them out some guns. She would have been faced with more than one childish and humiliating stare at the prospect of spending the day alone with him. Lexie told Daryl she would drive, if anything just for a change of pace and scenery and she enjoyed the breeze that blew through her hair from the open window as she sped along the back roads. Daryl sat beside her and glanced over every now and then, thinking she hadn’t picked up on his occasional stolen peeks of her.

She reached forward, her fingertips grazing over the dials on the CD player of the truck. She pressed the eject button and plucked the CD out, holding it up in front of her.

“Hmm, Journey.” She commented before loading it back into the CD player. She went to press the ‘play’ button but Daryl stopped her.

“Don’t.” He said.

She looked back at the button and smirked, her gaze returning to him.

“Please. Don’t.” He repeated.

She pressed the button and the sound of 80’s rock music filled the car. Daryl slumped against the inside of the door, propping his head up with a hand on his forehead and sighed in irritation. Lexie nodded her head and pursed her lips as she changed gears and surged the car forwards, joining in with the band on the chorus.

“Don’t stop, believin’! Hold on to the feeeeeeling!” She sang at him.

Daryl just looked out of the window on his side, now not irritated at all. Now, he was fighting as hard as he could not to give her the satisfaction of seeing how amusing he found her.

“Streeeetlights! Peopleeeeee!” She cried, adding a power grab with her hand for extra emphasis and scrunching her eyes shut.

Daryl snorted with laughter, finally letting it go and smiling at her. He had now seen two sides to her that he hadn’t been graced with before. Her tenderness around children and her sense of humour and adventure when she was really able to let herself go.

Lexie had decided that Daryl was the only person she could feel completely herself around except Mel and Aaron and so, had stop caring about presenting herself a certain way and holding back the parts of her that those close to her deemed to be the most endearing features of her personality. She could have fun, she could laugh at herself and she could be gentle and loving if she wanted to. Only those that she could really trust were lucky enough to see it.

“Judith appreciates my singing. Even if you don’t.” She giggled.

 *****

Upon first inspection the mall appeared totally deserted and Lexie breathed a sigh of relief in the knowledge that she wasn’t going to have to do much brain stabbing after all. They crept across the vast parking lot which was littered with empty, abandoned vehicles that had all very obviously been siphoned of all their gas. Grass was starting to grow through cracks in the ground and billboards around the parking lot still displayed damaged and fading posters boasting of the latest deals and offers from various stores inside.

Daryl wanted her to stay alert and keep her knife in her hand. No guns unless they had no other choice. She had whole heartedly agreed that the last thing they needed now was a herd wandering through. He crept along in front of her, his crossbow raised and ready and she followed the wings on his back as they weaved in and out of the vehicles towards the delivery entrance door.

Lexie was guilty of becoming a little complacent as a result of the empty parking lot and was started to find the delivery entrance door milling with Walkers. Daryl had noticed first and she had been so busy checking nothing was following them that she barged straight into him. He stepped forwards, bracing himself on one foot before looking back at her. One of her hands had ended up on his bare upper arm and she quickly let go when she noticed the disgruntled look on his face. She moved back and held her hands up.

“Sorry.” She whispered.

Ignoring her clumsy accident, he motioned with his head to the corner of the wall they were stood against.

“Around the corner. Six of ‘em. Two on the left, four on the right. You go Left.” He instructed.

She had spent a long time out in the world faced with the continual threat from Walkers, but it was still something she was more than aware that she would never get used to. Each time she saw one, her nerves spiked with fear whether she chose to acknowledge it or not. But she had learned that a little fear was sometimes a good thing. It had prevented her from being too overconfident and making a stupid mistake.

“Ready?” Daryl asked.

“Ready.” She nodded.

“I got your back.” He assured her.

He shot around the corner, taking down one Walker straight away with a well-placed bolt and Lexie went for the two that had broken away to the left. She charged up two concrete steps and plunged her knife into the eye of a small, female Walker that toppled over straight away. As she retracted her blade, the other one came at her but she ducked and charged at it, pushing it backwards with a powerful shoulder barge that she didn’t even know she had in her. It tumbled down over some boxes, flailing its arms and it was then that she could see its clothing. It was a he, and he, under all the dried blood and gore, was a cop. She blinked at the image of the shredded, deceased and dangerous human in front of her as he scrambled to get back to his feet. Before he could stand fully, she slammed her knife through the top of his skull and he fell silent.

Looking over at Daryl, she saw him stab the final Walker that was near him before he ran to her, skidded to a stop on some loose gravel on the ground and grabbed her arm, lifting it up and scanning her with his eyes.

“You alright?” He asked eagerly.

“Yeah, fine” She grinned.

His hand was clamped around her wrist like a vice but she said nothing, too taken with the fact that he’d gone into protective mode with her. He held on for what she considered to be a couple of seconds too long and the worried look on his face had cemented in her mind that he did in fact, care a great deal about her. When he did let go, he backed up slightly and turned his concentration to trying the door, which was stuck fast. He grumbled under his breath and Lexie could tell her was checking every inch of the door meticulously with his eyes, running through his options. She unlaced an arm from her bag and unzippered it.

“Will this work?” She asked.

Daryl looked over his shoulder to see her stood holding a crowbar with a smug look on her face. Without a word and only a fleeting half smile, he took the metal bar from her and jammed it between the two doors. He heaved with all his might, his face crumpling and his arms flexing to the point that Lexie had to look away, not trusting herself enough to be able to refrain from drooling. A crack followed by a grunt from Daryl echoed around the delivery area and Lexie briefly closed her eyes and tried to pull herself together after suddenly finding everything inherently sexual for the last few minutes.

_What the hell is wrong with me?! Focus!_

“Alright, let’s go.” He said, handing her the crowbar.

They meandered through the back hallways of the Mall, the silence inside the building was almost deafening and the thudding of their footsteps sounded ten times louder than is usually did. Lexie even tried to breathe slower, feeling like everything she was doing sounded like she was a bull in a china shop. Inside so far, they had found no Walkers and Daryl confirmed the same could be said for the main area of the Mall when he poked his head around the fire escape door to find a wholly uninhabited space.

Daryl read through the list while Lexie took in all the store fronts, jewellery, clothing, homeware, cell phones and many, many others. Daryl glanced up to find her peering through the front window of a dark bookstore and he wished he could just unlock the door, slap the lights on and let her loose in there.

“Hey” He called out. She turned to him, her eyes full of wonder. “C’mon, we should hit some of the restaurants kitchens.”

 *****

Two shopping carts filled to the brim with non-perishables from the restaurants, clothes and children’s items from a department store and tools from the homeware store sat immobile at their side as they lay back on the flat, rounded seats in the middle of the Mall. Both of them stared up at the ceiling with it’s elaborate pattered coving and large windows that displayed the bright blue sky outside. Neither of them spoke as they enjoyed the tranquillity and Daryl was glad he had asked her to accompany him on a trip that he had originally intended to take with Glenn. But after making some excuses and walking off before Glenn could ask for his list back, his comrade had become Lexie, who he preferred to look at a lot more than Glenn anyway. He slowly turned his head, studying the side of her face. Lexie knew he was looking at her again and she gradually smiled up at the roof.

“What?” She croaked.

“Nothin’.” He mumbled.

“Caught you looking at me a lot today.” She told him.

 _If I want a straight answer, I’ll ask a direct question._ She thought.

“Sorry.” He apologised.

Lexie sat up and shuffled back, crossing her legs under her. He looked solemn and downcast now, not like he had been before and she began to connect the dots as she remembered their conversation in the abandoned store.

“What is it?” She asked.

Daryl sighed loudly and also sat upright, draping his hands over his knees.

“What ya mean?” He questioned.

“What is it about me that’s making you think of her so much right now?”

His entire face glazed over with concern. He had been careful so far not to focus on her likeness to Faith too much, hoping it would put her mind at rest and serve as confirmation that it was not the reason why he enjoyed spending time with her. Yet she had figured it out without any doubt over the last few hours. He felt a stab of guilt but had little desire to lie, concluding that the right thing to do was to just be honest.

“She had this light in her eyes. Like a sparkle or somethin’. Was always when she was happy or laughin’.” He paused to take a deep breath, struggling to meet her eye as he explained. “Seen a different side to you today. How ya were with Judith. Singin’ at me in the car. Even when ya got all smarty pants about the crowbar. It’s there, the same light. You got it too.”

Lexie swallowed hard. _What do I say to this?!_

“Oh” She smiled shyly into her lap.

The profound and logical response she had been searching for in the far corners of her mind had all but vanished, if it was even there in the first place and all she was left with was the urge to grin like a fool. But when a few more moments passed and she had no doubt he was still observing her, she was able to offer up a better reply.

“I’m getting to spend the whole day with you.” She tried “ So, I guess I am happy and if that’s the way it shows, then I’m going to take that a compliment.”

Daryl hadn’t expected her to be anywhere near as pleased to spend the day with him as she appeared. He had assumed that his desire to spend time with her far outweighed any urges she had to be around him, but she had affirmed that his opinion was quite to the contrary.

“I wish I could see what she looked like.” She mused.

“Just gotta look in a mirror.” He huffed.

“But I just see me. I want to know what you see.” She corrected.

“I told ya before. When I look at you, I don’t see her. I see you. There’s just a lot of her in you.” He attempted to clarify.

Lexie still looked down into her lap, chipping away at the black polish on her thumb.

“I understand. Just wish there was a picture or something.” She shrugged.

Daryl didn’t say anymore. He just brought a hand to his face and clamped his teeth down on his thumbnail, nervously nibbling away at it while she slowly blinked and twitched her nose and licked her lips as she picked at her nail. He knew it was a difficult thing to come to terms with, it had taken him months to accept that Faith was gone and now he had someone that looked like her twin sat in front of him. She was alluring and attractive in her own right with her own personality that he loved to be around but it would hit him like a smack in the face at times. Faith used to do that. Faith used to like that. Faith used to smile at him like that. It would stir his soul and send pain through his heart because he missed her deeply but it would also remind him of his promise to her.

He cleared his throat and shifted closer to her on the cushioned, flat surface, his arm settled against hers and he saw her start slightly and glare at him in surprise. As he looked at her eyes, seeing that the familiar sparkle was still present. He reached into his jeans pocket and took hold of a shiny piece of card inside. His fingers gripped it with a fierce sense of protection but he was going to do this. Because he trusted Lexie. He pulled the card from his jeans and held it out. Her eyes dropped and widened at the photograph in his hand.

“There is a picture.” He whispered.

The photo was face down, the image facing away from her for a reason. He was giving her a choice. He didn’t know if seeing it would make things better or worse for her. So he was handing the decision over to her.

“No one else knows it exists.” He said. “But…I trust ya.”

Lexie raised a hand and took the photo from him. She slowly turned it over and held her breath when she saw the stunning woman in the image. She wore a black, fitted, floor length gown with a plunging neckline. Her hair was perfectly styled and her lips a brilliant red. She looked like a movie star. Daryl watched her closely, her jaw tightened and she blinked rapidly, he could hear her release a held back breath.

“Was our first night out together.” He informed her and allowing some context to the photo.

“Where were you guys going for her to look so glamorous?” She asked. Her face finally breaking into a wide and genuine smile.

“Charity fundraiser. Wasn’t my thing, but she asked so I went. Almost turned around and went home when I saw her on her porch dressed like that.” He admitted.

“Why?”

“Didn’t think I was good enough for her. Still don’t.”

Lexie looked up at him. He was the closest he’d ever been to her and while she knew he wasn’t the most expressive of people, she could see the love etched on his face as he stared at the picture in her hand. But it was also mixed with pain.

“I didn’t know her, but I know that’s not true.” Lexie stated.

When he didn’t say anything else, she resumed her studying of the picture while he straightened out his legs but didn’t move away, not wanting to break the contact of their arms.

Lexie didn’t feel like she was looking at a picture of herself, but she couldn’t deny that she had similarities to Faith. She had the same eye colour, the same shaped face and nose and both had brunette hair. But the same could be said for her and a multitude of other people.

“I don’t think I look that much like her.” She expressed. She could see from the corner of her eye that he turned to her straight away.

“Really?!” He asked “You lookin’ at the same picture as me?! Why not?”

“She was very beautiful for a start.” She scoffed.

“She was. You’re real similar.” He replied.

She suddenly guessed what he was trying to say and felt her cheeks start to burn like she was some kind of shy child. He bent a leg and placed an elbow on it, rubbing a hand over his face. She heard him sigh and growl slightly under his breath.

“You’re beautiful too.” He uttered.

Her mouth dropped open and her eyes fixed on something insignificant and off to the side as his unexpected response settled in her mind. She had been told many times that she was beautiful. By Mel, by Aaron, by her mother and by various men who were all vying for her attention. She never once believed that any of them meant it. It was just a word that was thrown around and had lost it’s meaning. Once upon a time, it meant everything, it was the ultimate, romantic adjective. Now, coming from someone as withdrawn and guarded as Daryl, who’s opinion she had come to value, even more so his opinion of her, it meant more to her than he could ever know. No words would come to her, her mind was blank except for one, constantly circulating thought.

_He thinks I’m beautiful._

She gently passed the photograph back to him and he shoved it back into his pocket. She was sure at least a minute had passed, maybe two and she still couldn’t find anything to say.

“Um…I’m sorry. For the silence.” She tried.

“S’alright.”

“I wasn’t expecting you to say that.” She confessed as she felt a laugh rise in her chest like a demanding cough that wouldn't go away. She tried to stifle it, tried to force it back down but it burst from her lungs and she clamped her hand over her mouth. Glancing at Daryl with worry that she’d offended him.

“I’m sorry.” She giggled. “I laugh when I’m-“

“-nervous. Yeah, I know.” He replied. Lexie was relieved to spot a smirk forming on his face. “Think ya sposed to just say thank you.”

“Thank you” She quickly blurted out, realising she hadn’t even considered that she needed to thank him for expressing such a meaningful opinion to her. “Sorry. Of course, thank you. I-I can’t believe you actually think that.”

“Why?”

“Because I really like you.” She divulged, before she even had time to think about it.

Daryl fidgeted nervously before shocking her and taking her hand. Her stomach flipped as he laced his fingers with hers and rested them on her thigh. She could feel the sensation of his unease in his grip, which wavered between tensing and release sporadically.

“Me too.” He mumbled.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just adore the comments I get on this. You WONDERFUL PEOPLE! Lost my motivation for a bit recently. I got sick (again) and then got distracted with work. But I am back! There are some major twists and turns planned for this now I've had time and determination to plan it out, so watch this space! Chapters may get a little smaller so I can post more often. <3

In the midst of the chaos that was the new world, Lexie and Daryl sat, hand in hand in the middle of the deserted Mall. Both of them lost in their own thoughts, the stillness that blanketed them. A comfort in finding a mutual, unsaid agreement that this was it, the first time they’d had significant physical contact that was for no reason other than their own desires. Besides family members, Lexie had never just enjoyed the pleasure of holding someone’s hand before. To her it said so much by doing so little. A kind of complex simplicity and she was surprised at the feelings it raised in her. She experienced a myriad of emotions that she hadn’t anticipated. Among them, a sense of acceptance and safety. Could it be that Daryl was to be the first person she trusted not to break her heart? When she was with him, she not only felt safe from the horrors that surrounded them, but also from herself.

Daryl hadn’t held anyone’s hand since Faith had been lost to the bite of a Walker and as he sat there with Lexie, his fingers laced into hers, their palms warming more and more by the second, he considered that it was almost a kind of message to her, even though she was nothing but a memory. He was trying. Trying to honour her wish, no matter how hard it was and this small physical act that seemed to monumental to him, was his way of showing both Lexie and Faith that he knew he had to move on. Regardless of his efforts, the guilt still stung like a nettle on the skin.

“Should probably head back.” Muttered Daryl. There was a hint in his voice that he really didn’t want to have to move from the comfortable yet completely new situation they’d found themselves in.

“Yeah” Lexie agreed, her eyes slowly moving around the Mall’s shop fronts. “Load up the car.”

“Yeah.”

She heaved in a deep breath, her shoulders rising slightly and the grip on his hand tightened briefly. When she released a sigh, she was alarmed to hear in her own head how nervous it made her sound.

“Guess I should… let go of ya hand.” He uttered.

She pursed her lips and nodded slowly, still keeping her gaze trained away from him. The moment still too unusual and new for her to be brave enough to look at him.

“Mmhmm” She hummed.

He awkwardly cleared his throat and fidgeted, reluctantly moving his hand from hers. Her skin felt cold without him wrapped around her but the excited, nervous sensation that he made her feel was still ever present.

The journey back had been uneventful, Lexie had initially fallen quiet while she replayed their moment in the Mall over and over. A breeze still wafted through the car from the open window beside her, blowing her hair about and providing some welcome relief from the day’s heat. The CD player still sang and performed but this time at a much lower level. Unable to help herself, Lexie also still sang, this time just to herself. Daryl hadn’t offered much in the way of conversation either, he was still asking himself if despite being the initiator, taking her hand was the right thing to do.  

*****

Lexie pulled the car up to the pantry entrance where Mel appeared and helped them to unpack all the supplies and food they had found. The pantry wasn’t just used for consumables. Other items like clothing and toiletries were stored there and rationed and Mel set about stacking everything on the shelves at the back of the room. Lexie was unpacking a box of tins on the other side of the room while Daryl wandered through the door with the last box from the car.

“There’s a meeting tonight, you going, Daryl?” Mel asked.

“Nah.” He grumbled “Anything I need to know I hear from Rick anyways.”

Mel stopped folding clothes and tilted her head to the side slightly while a plan ran through her mind.

“Hmm, that’s an idea.” She mused “Lex, I’ll go to the meeting. Why don’t you stay at home?”

“What? Why?” Lexie questioned.

Mel’s eyes rolled up to the ceiling in an all to obvious display of bewilderment.  She hadn’t expected Lexie to get the hint straight away, her experience in such predicaments being next to none. She grabbed her sister’s arm and dragged her out of Daryl’s earshot.

“You’ll have the house to yourself. Invite him over.” She whispered.

“Oh… w-why?”

“Why? What do you mean, why?! So you can get busy!”

“Melissa!” Lexie hissed “Oh my god, stop.” Her cheeks hummed with warmth. She believed that the state of the world had to mean that no all loving deity was listening to anyone’s prayers anymore, but she prayed nevertheless that Daryl couldn’t hear what Mel had said.

Mel Shifted her weight to one foot and placed a hand on her hip, narrowing her eyes at Lexie and letting out a small huff. Her bright pink button down shirt pinched at the hip where her hand was, exposing the top of one breast as a result of Mel’s reluctance to wear anything that covered up what she frequently reminded Lexie were her ‘best assets.’

“Don’t tell me you’d kick him out of bed” she said, craning her neck around Lexie to leer at Daryl for a second. “Dude is _fine_.”

Lexie swallowed hard. She hated having to discuss such topics, let alone with Mel, who’s confidence and matter-of-fact attitude towards men, love and sex always seemed alien and bizarre to her. She never knew where she had garnered her crass and carefree ideals from. Their mother had been a classy but feisty woman who didn’t suffer fools, certainly no frat house regular with a short skirt and an even shorter timeline between boyfriends. Mel was so different to everyone in the family that Lexie had once commented at the dinner table that it was like she was the product of a brief and passionate spell with the mailman. The quip had earned her a stinging, slapped hand and two weeks of silent treatment from their mother. Lexie had learned over the years that she could be as outspoken and blunt with Mel as she wanted, provided she was prepared to endure a backlash of unladylike and sometimes downright deliberately filthy statements from her sister that were specifically designed to torment her quiet and withdrawn nature. She pushed her mouth to the side as she thought carefully. Then, she leaned forwards slightly, urging Mel to do the same with a look in her eye.

“He is fine as fuck. I’m shy, not insane.” She pointed out. Mel’s smug yet bordering on impressed expression conveying to Lexie that she was aware her persistence to get her to come out of her shell may just be paying off. “But we’re not at that point.”

“Giiiirl.” Mel giggled “I have never heard you say anything that that before!”

Lexie rapidly flapped a hand in front of her, hissing for her to keep her voice down as panic thundered through her chest.

“Oh relax, he can’t hear us. Just invite him over. I’ll go to Aaron and Eric’s afterwards.” She winked as she scooted off back to the shelves.

Daryl, unbeknownst to Lexie and Mel, had in fact heard the entire thing. He may be a man of little conversation for the majority of the time but his hearing and observation skills were second to none, in part due to the amount of time he spent out in the woods during his life but also from spending hours as a child, listening carefully for his father to pass out from the alcohol so he could leave his room and creep into the kitchen to get food. Not wanting to fall victim to another vicious beating or a barrage of verbal abuse.

Every word had been clear, albeit with a small amount of effort required to concentrate on the hushed tones of their voices. Lexie considered him to be as Mel put it ‘fine’ and such a compliment had been scarce in Daryl’s life, having only ever received similar flattering mentions from Faith. He wasn’t sure if he had ever grown used to it. Her admission of her opinion had left him with conflicting thoughts in his head. He tried to shove them away, to hide them and pay them no mind. But they remained, prevalent and gnawing.

_She finds me attractive. She doesn’t really mean that._

He didn’t know if Lexie would take her sister’s advice, nor did he know if he would even accept an invitation. His head was beginning to get crowded. When they were alone in her room, he would notice the different shades of brown in her hair, some chestnut, some mahogany. The different lines shimmered and danced as she moved and the room would get lighter. His fingertips traced over her tattoo, the electric pull towards her wrenching him closer and the clouds seemed to clear. He would hear her melodic and captivating laugh and there would be nothing else worth worrying about, just for those few seconds, when he would lose himself and crave the side of her that she hardly showed to anyone else. The way she was so talkative when she was comfortable with someone. Her witty and boisterous sense of humour. Her intellect and ability to draw so much from words on the pages of a book. Then, without warning, he was jolted back to reality and the confusion and chaos of his own thoughts. Of his loss, of the guilt and of the increasing feeling that he had no idea what he was doing.

Daryl waited for Lexie to walk back from handing the car keys to Deanna. He leaned against the armoury wall after checking their guns back in with Olivia and followed Lexie with his head down and his eyes fixed on her, the sweaty strands of the front of his hair slightly obscuring his vision. She scuffed lazily along the sidewalk, the soles of her boots making a racket that she took no notice of. Daryl’s mouth quirked up into a slight smile at the thought of her indifference to anyone else at times. When she neared him, she licked her lips and he saw them shimmer in the glowing sun as she thumbed through a book in her hand, her eyes darting up for a split second to check her route was clear. He pushed off from the wall, meeting her as she passed. A small nod was exchanged between them, having little need for words and more of a wordless understanding that they seemed to have developed. He walked by her side towards her house as she turned the book over in her hands and read the passage on the back, still pacing noisily along the paving. Daryl cracked his knuckle, pushed his hands into his jeans pockets and then removed them again. His limbs seemingly crawling with the need for occupation but with what, he had no idea.

“This is me.” Lexie announced, spinning slightly on her heels outside her house as if Daryl had never seen where she lived. Like they had been on some kind of unexpected first date and he had chaperoned her home. She squinted at him in the sun, one side of her lip lifting up as one eye almost shut in the direct light of the rays. She pinned the book under her arm as she wrung her hands in front of her.

“Thanks for invitin- Well, ordering me to come with you.” She said with a hint of mild amusement.

“Sorry ‘bout that.” Daryl grumbled.

“I didn’t mind, really. I guess I was trying to use it as a reason to flirt with you. But it bombed when I realised that I can’t flirt for shit.” She admitted, her eyes dropping to the floor.

“Oh” He grunted, his eyebrow raising slightly. “Aint so hot at that either.”

“Expect me to believe that after the stunt you pulled in the armoury in front of Aaron?” She giggled.

Daryl hadn’t necessarily thought of it as flirting at the time. It had been more of an accidental situation that had grown out of standing that bit too close to her. Admittedly, he had made no attempt to stop it as it spiralled and had only uncovered a burning desire for a repeat performance, but his nerve had not complied since. Upon reassessing his actions, he could see why it could be perceived as a flirtatious and bold move. He remembered the parting of her lips, the closing of her eyes and the change in her breathing as he stood in such close proximity he could have nuzzled into the side of her face. He concluded that he probably was flirting, without even considering it at the time and it was something he wouldn’t mind trying again if he could be sure she wouldn’t recoil in terror.

“That make ya uncomfortable?” He asked.

She had been uncomfortable, but not in the negative sense of the word. Her inexperience with such occurrences had provided her with a barrier to overcome, but she had soon summoned the courage to shoot him a witty line once she had pulled herself together.

“In a good way” She smiled. _You know what I mean._

“Uh…right.” He gushed. _I know what she means._ “Good. I should-I should get goin’.” He motioned with his thumb over his shoulder “See ya around.”

_Invite him over._

“OK, bye.” She chirped, backing up the path and gripping the book in her fingers like it was a block of her own fear she was holding. She wanted to squash it, to rip it up so it couldn’t stop her from doing what she wanted. But the chance was gone. Daryl was stalking off towards his house and Lexie was left to remain in the confines of the walls of her room for the night. Being alone would usually have struck her as a wonderful idea, something she would look forward to, but not now. Now, she had blown her chance because she hadn’t been braved asking a simple question.

 ****

Daryl smoked on the front porch as people started to leave their houses and make their way towards Deanna’s place. Rick had left with Michonne and Carol and Carl was in the house with Judith along with a few of the other teenagers from the community. The sky was clear blue but he could sense a storm coming, he could always anticipate it a long time before it happened. Before the rains arrived, he could feel the wind pick up and see the clouds roll in, bringing with them a sweet, pungent zing in his nostrils. The sharp, fresh aroma of ozone.

Daryl spotted Mel bounce from the porch and run over to Aaron and Eric, who were waiting for her on the sidewalk and had both politely raised a hand in Daryl’s direction. He nudged his head up at them and slouched further down in his seat, lifting his boots up and propping them up on the table in front of him. Carol hated it when he used the table as a footrest, or anything else for that matter. But she wasn’t there, so his boots could settle where ever they wanted for now.

 

Lexie paced about in the living room, back and forth, over and over, following the same line she had created on the carpet. She mumbled to herself, a string of mixed up thoughts formed from saying the first thing that popped into her head. On more than one occasion, she had set off for the door, only to reach the handle and turn on her heels, talking herself out of leaving the house and allowing self-doubt to cloud her intentions. Despite her longing to spend more time with him, she wasn’t entirely convinced that he wasn’t going to suddenly second guess his interest in her and so she had reserved a certain amount of judgement in order to keep her own emotions safely guarded behind the brick wall she had built up after so many years of pushing people away so they couldn’t leave her. 

She had changed into a black, fitted, button down shirt with sleeves that reached her elbows, showing her tattoos, along with a pair of tight, dark blue jeans. She had fastened her hair into a loose ponytail. Her fingers were decorated with plain, rings made from black gemstones that she wore mainly for the aesthetic effect more than the meaning of the stone. Unlike Mel, Lexie was understated and practical, but still had her own sense of style. Usually comprising of unusual jewellery, band and slogan T-shirts and pants that boasted pockets and straps that she could make use of. Hardly ever wearing make-up, she had amassed a variety of mascaras, eyeliners and other cast offs from Mel that she had never even attempted to wear aside from on a special occasion when her sister had forced her to. Apparently, having the house to herself qualified as a special occasion to Mel, who had grabbed her in passing and flicked a mascara brush over her eyelashes despite rigorous complaining from Lexie. She lifted a hand and pinched the corner of her eyelashes, where a clump of mascara was creating a blurry, black spot in the corner of her vision. She sighed to herself as she removed it and looked back over at the door.

“What’s the worst he can say?” She asked herself. “No. No is the worst he can say.”

She walked over to the door and curled her fingers around the handle.

“Fuck it.”

 

Daryl was on cigarette number two and beer number one as he carved vertical lines into the edge of the table between his boots with his knife. He knew Carol would have kittens when she saw it, but he would claim ignorance and beat a hasty retreat when that happened. He looked up when a blur flashed past on the outside of the porch and within seconds found Lexie stood on the top step, her hands clasped in front of her. He instantly picked up on her change of clothes, startled by just how much she looked like Faith in that moment. When she was at the bar, working. Casual and effortless but to him, she always looked perfectly put together. He recalled how she tied her hair loosely into a ponytail as she poured drinks and told the bikers off for making a mess. He was looking at Lexie, staring intensely, but this time, he wasn’t seeing her. He was seeing Faith. His heart ached and he wanted to let his rage take over. He fought the need to hack away at the table, his knife primed with its tip dug into the wood. He wanted to yell, throw things about and maybe even cry, he wasn’t sure. Emotions thundered through him, stung at his core like venom running through his veins and some of them he didn’t even recognise. Outwardly, he ground his teeth, his jaw taut and his eyes serious.

_Take me back. I want to meet her all over again. I miss her._

“Hi” She said quietly, tapping a boot on the wooden flooring.

He grunted curtly in response.

“Um, Are you busy?” She questioned.

“I look busy?” He replied.

She sensed the abrupt tone to his voice and questioned if he had actually just snapped at her. Her head telling her that he most certainly had but her heart tugging away, encouraging her to stay positive. Pushing herself to follow through with her plan, she shook it off and continued.

“No, no you don’t. Um, Mel’s gone to the meeting. Do you wanna come over? I have a low budget movie and a bottle of whiskey that I could use some help with.”

His eyes dropped and he focused on finishing his smoke and sipping from his bottle of beer for a moment. She noticed his whole demeanour had changed since she’d seen him three hours ago and she thought back to the car journey, his silence. It wasn’t out of the ordinary for Daryl to be quiet, just like it wasn’t for her. But together, they talked. She had come to accept that they actually spoke a lot more than she had ever anticipated. But he had withdrawn into himself in the car and had not even looked at her until they’d arrived back at the gates and now, while he sat in front of her, surly and disinterested, at least a minute had passed and he looked out over the street, seemingly disinterested in her. She knew he wasn’t going to answer her.

 _He held my hand. He regrets it._ _Now he’s pushing me away._ _It’s exactly what I’d do. It’s exactly what I might do in the future. What the hell are we doing?_

“Y’know what? It doesn’t matter. I’ll see you around.” She backtracked, changing her mind completely and racing down the steps before he had a chance to respond. Her cheeks burned with humiliation, her heartbeat pounded in her ears and she could only think that this was exactly how Mel had felt when he had shunned her advances in the exact same spot.  

Daryl was enraged at himself. He sat, motionless with his cigarette poised in front of his face and his head still turned to the steps of the porch while he tried to assess what had just happened and why. His eyebrows furrowed and his lips were parted.

_Nice work, jackass._

 

The door slammed behind her and she stopped in the hallway, her head tilted to the ceiling and her eyes squeezed shut in an attempt to blot out what had just happened. She wished she was reading it in a book, so she could blot out the page with correction fluid, erasing it forever and learning a valuable lesson; you are better off alone. She angrily splayed her hands out in front of her and let out a hissed, growl of frustration through her teeth. Her whole body shook with vexation. She took a deep breath and made the decision to go to the meeting with everyone else. Even if it meant sitting in the background out of Deanna’s sight so she couldn’t single her out like she regularly did. Daryl would see her from the porch but she paid that no mind, telling herself that it was a good thing, that he would assume she wasn’t bothered which is exactly what she wanted him to think.

_How has Mel done this time and time again?! This shit is exhausting._

She whirled around with determination and opened the door to find Daryl leaning against the outer doorframe with his forearm braced on the wood above him. Shock resulted in a rapid blink and a staggering step backwards from her. His gaze instantly met hers and she unintentionally shrank back from the door.  

“What kinda movie?” He questioned, her discomfort not lost on him.

He was under no illusions that he had most likely hurt her feelings and embarrassed her and had no idea how to make it right, but he was damn well going to try.

“Uuh…” She tried as her eyes glazed over for a fleeting moment, her brain scrabbling around in the far corners, shoving away her anger and looking for an answer to his question. “It’s- the guy is a murderer-a slasher. It’s a slasher movie.”

“It’ll do.” He grunted, inviting himself inside and closing the door behind him.

Lexie stood in front of him with her eyebrows raised and her mouth open, baffled as to what was going on and how she should handle it.

“Didn’t give me a chance to say yes or no” He prodded.

“I thought… I thought you weren’t interested. So, I-I left.” She shrugged. _Come on, you are stronger than that._ “Actually, you were a jerk so I’d rather spend my evening with Poe. He’s more of a gentleman than you it seems.”

Daryl sighed and rubbed a hand over his face.

“Alright. I deserve that. M’sorry, just caught me at a bad time.” He lied.

Lexie nodded and turned to head into the kitchen, using the few seconds her back was turned to try and compose herself. She grabbed two small glasses from the cupboard and pointed to the bottle of whiskey on the opposite end of the counter, where Daryl was standing. She aimed to pour two drinks, hear him out and then kick him out to prove that she wasn’t to be trifled with.

“Slide that over here.” She instructed with a bossy and fed up tone.

“Ya drink whiskey?” He asked, apparently surprised by her poison of choice. He slid the bottle across the counter and Lexie caught it without so much as a blink.

“My father liked his whiskey.” Was her short reply as she opened the bottle and poured their drinks.

“Yeah, mine too.” Daryl muttered under his breath. He winced when he saw her knock back the liquid in her glass, straight down without a shudder followed by a second without hesitation. _Holy shit_ he thought. Then, she poured another and placed both hands on the counter in front of her. To Daryl, it looked as though she was preparing for some kind of argument and he figured that he should probably prepare himself, reasoning that if she could argue like she could drink, he might have his work cut out.

“You regret it, don’t you?” She blurted out.

“What?”

“You regret holding my hand at the Mall.”

She side eyed him, witnessing how uncomfortable her line of questioning had made him and experiencing a flurry of satisfaction that he could feel a fraction of what she had felt on the porch. He had stepped back slightly and was chewing on his thumb nail. She tapped the countertop with her fingernail, gaining his attention and slid his glass of whiskey along the counter to him.  He caught it and gave her a small nod of thanks. An unsaid message passed between them. She was right, he did need it. The alcohol hit the back of his throat, its strong aroma filling his sinuses in a sensation that was milder than he’d anticipated at first, but then came the burn. He shook his head subtly and looked up at her. She was watching him with a faint smile.

“It ain’t that.” He rasped.  

“Then what is it?” She purred.

He carefully considered how hearing the truth would make her feel and remembered that she had been patient and understanding, trustworthy and not pushy so far because he had been honest with her. He at least owed her the simple act of continuing with the same truthfulness.

“I don’t regret it.” He assured her “I just, I feel like I’m cheatin’ on her.”

She moved closer to him, both hands cupped around the glass in front of her.

“Can I ask you a difficult question?”

“OK.” He agreed.

“If Faith were still alive and it was you that was bitten that day. If you weren’t here and she was, would you want her to move on and be happy if she could?” She queried.

Daryl took another gulp of his drink at the mere sound of Lexie saying Faith’s name. Her question wasn’t something he’d considered before, at least not from that point of view, but he knew what his answer was.

“Yeah.” He whispered.

She tilted her head slightly towards him and then back again, coupled with a noncommittal shrug that gave the impression she was trying to reveal something extremely obvious to him.

“Then you should allow yourself that too.” She offered with a noticeably softer tone.

“She made me promise.” He sighed.

“What did she say?” Lexie asked apprehensively. Try as she might, she just couldn’t shake her attraction to him and above all, her feelings for him. She fought a war inside, between not allowing herself to be treated as if she was nothing and succumbing to her growing feelings of affection. She was aware that there was a mark that couldn’t be overstepped with this, or everything that had happened so far would mean nothing and Daryl would retreat back into his shell, just like she would.

“Said that if I found someone, I should try. She wanted me to try.” He explained.

It was all he was comfortable enough to give her. Leaving the details of his promise close to his heart. Maybe he would tell her one day, offer up the details without a second thought but now didn’t seem like the right time. Lexie seemed to accept it and agree with it all at once. She leaned back on the counter, crossing one boot over the other and sipped her drink.

“Daryl, I can’t claim to understand because I don’t.” She started “But I know that losing people I loved changed me. Grief changed you. It’s shifted you and transformed you into somebody new. You told me that the person you used to be died with her, like the world ripped your other half from you. It didn’t, he’s still there, he’s just… different.”

He was glaring at her, his eyes locked with hers. He had listened to many lectures from Carol over the past few months and tried to take it all in, tried to make sense of it all. But now it was coming from someone else, from Lexie, who was potentially the ‘someone else’ that Faith had been referring to and it was different somehow, it was sinking in easier. He sensed her anger towards him but nevertheless, she still had a way of appealing to him that no one else could manage, when she spoke, he listened to every word even if it was about nothing of interest to him.

“One day, you’ll see how whole you already are on your own. She’s gone but you’re still here, all of you. You have to believe that you are as important as she was. You’ve admitted you’d want her to be happy. I’m not saying it has to be with me, but you deserve to be happy too. I didn’t know her, but I think it’s what she would have wanted if she made you promise.”

Her words had penetrated the barrier he put up around himself when it came to talking about Faith. She claimed not to understand but she had communicated exactly what he needed to hear. It wasn’t much different from anything Carol had said before, except now it was coming from Lexie. He stepped closer to her narrowing the space between them.  

“Like I said, I’m tryin’” He reiterated “I don’t regret holdin’ ya hand. Same way I don’t regret telling ya I like ya. You’re right, everythin’ ya said. Just...complicated. That n' I aint used to doin somethin’ for me, y’know? I don’t want for much, but it was always Merle or Faith or Carol or Rick or someone else.”

Lexie’s eyes met his and she offered him an understanding smile. A smile he was reassured to see. “OK. Just don’t shut me out. I literally have no idea what I’m doing. I have never trusted anyone enough to get this close to them. My whole life I have pushed people away before they can walk out on me. You and I, we don’t really talk much to anyone else, but we talk to each other. So, I need you to keep doing that. If your change your mind and you decide that this…that I’m not for you. I won’t be mad if you just tell me.”

He was nibbling on this bottom lip, nervously “Alright” He mumbled.

“Don’t snap at me and ignore me like that again. I’ll kick your fucking ass, tough guy.” She nudged, raising an eyebrow. He huffed and took another drink and she could see him smiling through the glass.

She gradually skirted around him on her way to the living room, hearing him follow behind her and stopping in her tracks when he grasped her hand and pulled her to a stop. She held her breath when she realised how close he was to her. As close as he’d been in the armoury. His fingers still gripped hers in a warm embrace.  

“You changed your mind? ‘Bout me?” He growled, his blue eyes levelled and serious. 

Lexie almost melted from his stare alone and struggled to contain the powerful urge to tell him that he was managing to turn her on with a single look and the touch of her hand, but figured that was all a little too much information this early on in proceedings. Especially when it occurred to her that his domineering side, his apparently effortless and possibly unintentional, masculine, bossy and controlling tendencies were more erotically charged and powerful to her than she had anticipated. Instead, she revelled in his attention and braved a squeeze of his fingers.

“No” She breathed.  

She noticed his eyes flicker down to her lips and her heart jumped at the thought that he might actually take the risk and kiss her. Among the electrifying orchestra of excitement in her veins, was sheer panic.

“Same.” He uttered. His voice was gravelly, his southern drawl more pronounced than ever. 

_Oh my god. I smell like an alcoholic. What if my lips are rough? I could be a bad kisser. I’ve only kissed two guys! I haven’t prepared for this!_

She saw him suck in a deep breath and swallow hard while she peered up at him. His fingers loosened in her grip as he detached them from her, she thought that was it. That was all the contact she was going to get. But then, the skin on the back of her hand and wrist exploded with light tingles. He was tracing his fingertips up and down the back of her hand in a line as he closed the gap between them and gently nestled his head at the side of hers. Her eyes dropped closed and she exhaled a long and loud breath. He was breaking down her walls, unravelling her without even noticing and she could only hope she was doing the same for him. Lexie had finally felt something she never had before. Chemistry. The kind of chemistry that touched her mind yet set her body on fire and she never wanted it to end. Mel had once told her that by not pursuing anyone she liked, she was missing out on finding out what ‘Panty-dropping chemistry' felt like. Stood, there with Daryl caressing the back of her hand and nuzzling the side of her face, her skin broke out into goose pimples and warmth emanated from between her legs and she suspected that she was very much in the throes of it, right then and there. He had the odor of whiskey, cigarettes and leather and she wondered if she'd ever encounter these smells again and not think of this moment. She turned her face to him, her nose lightly grazing his cheek and she could see his lips were opened ever so slightly, his breath taken away just like hers.

_Not so hot at flirting. My ass._

Daryl had made more progress in the last five minutes than he ever thought possible. He had been torn between his loyalty to Faith and his attraction to Lexie and as a result of his truthfulness and Lexie’s interpretation of it, he had found himself closer to her, physically and emotionally than he had ever been and once again it was Lexie he saw, not Faith. He wanted to kiss her. He knew why he wanted to kiss her. It was because she was beautiful, and exactly the right kind of smart and funny. She connected with him in a way that only one other person had in his life. He could feel her grip tighten around his hand as she turned to him and he moved back slightly. Her lips were shiny, inviting and parted subtly, as if she were about to say something. He wanted to kiss her. To show her that she didn’t need to say anything. That words were just obstacles sometimes. He wanted to kiss her. 


	14. Chapter 14

It was all too soon. He needed time and so did she. He stepped back and let go of her hand, the sexual tension between them still evident upon the flushed appearance of her chest and the heavy breaths he took. He needed to back off before his body gave away exactly how much he was enjoying being so close to her.

Lexie’s mind raced when she considered that the mere touch of a hand and a cheekbone had practically melted her on the spot. Her skin itched with excitement from the inside at the prospect of an actual kiss. The ‘first kiss feeling’ Mel always talked about. Lexie’s first kiss had been purely a physical thing, a means to an end, even bordering on some kind of strange, personal experiment to see what all the fuss was about. In her life, she had never had a meaningful and genuine first kiss and she couldn’t help but smile when she realised that the chances of Daryl being that to her were very high indeed.

He saw her lips curl and her cheeks tint pink from the corner of his eye, a surge of gratification running through him. He had done that to her. Stopped her dead in her tracks and silenced her. He had heard her breaths turn jagged, seen her chest rise and fall in a deep and sensual change of pace. He had witnessed her eyes close just before he connected his skin with hers, lightly dragging the edge of his lips across her cheekbone and promising himself that he wasn’t going to take things too far. Faith had taught him everything he knew and it was slowly coming back. He was capable of flirting, as terrifying as it seemed at first, it was just a look, a fleeting touch, or the idea of something more that leaves a lingering want, a need that had resulted in the both of them needing a minute to compose themselves.

“OK. Wow.” Lexie said to herself, under her breath and not intending for Daryl to catch it. She turned slowly and summoned the clarity to enable her body to step into the hallway and cross into the living room. Leaving Daryl to follow on behind, a small smile etched on his face.

She closed the drapes, flicked on the TV, loaded the DVD and placed her glass on the coffee table before falling back onto the couch opposite as if she had just finished a marathon. Daryl sat next to her and was already unlacing his boots before she could suggest it first. The light from the tv cast a flickering white glow through the space and Daryl looked up to see her peering at him in the darkened room. Her eyes were bright despite the blackness around them, full of questions, full of secrets he had yet to find out and he couldn’t wait. She gradually forced her gaze to a light green blanket draped over the arm of the couch at her side. She tugged at it and opened it up.

“Get comfortable.” She smiled.

He sat back, bringing his legs up onto the soft couch cushions and shifting to the side so he could bend them in front of him. She draped one end of the blanket over him and settled back against the other arm, facing him with her body but with her head turned towards the TV. She started the movie and snuggled further down in her spot. The couch was long enough for them both to have an end each and still have plenty of room.

 

 

Halfway through the movie, Lexie heard Daryl scoff loudly.

“What?” She asked.

They were still slumped against each arm, facing one another with the blanket over their legs. Their drinks now drained but Lexie had every intention of getting up and refilling them.

“These movies, they always do real dumb shit.” He complained.

“What do you mean?”

He pulled an arm out from under the blanket and motioned towards the TV.

“This Guy right here, he tried to jump from the roof. Ain’t no escape up there. Just askin' for a broken ankle fallin' from the top. The killers gonna find him 'n kill him because he’s too damn slow runnin' away with a fucked up ankle” he explained.

Lexie grinned at his certainty that he could do a better job than the character in the film. She had no doubt that he could. He was one of the most capable people in the entire community both at fighting and hunting and seemed fearless of everything, except his own emotions.

“What would you do then?” She challenged.

“Find somethin blunt 'n heavy, spring outta nowhere, bash his damn brains in.” He mentioned casually.

She laughed loudly and after doing a small double take, he caught her eye. He thought she was so pretty when she laughed like no one was watching. She could tell he was admiring her as the smile on his face faded slightly and was replaced by a look of awe. She brought a hand to her face and nibbled on her thumbnail, stifling her amusement.

“That’s funny, huh?” He jested.

“Yes. Because it’s typical of you.” She expressed.

“Alright, what would you do?”

 “Not find myself in a situation where a killer could let himself into my house while I’m inside and alone?” She shrugged, winking at him. A quick gesture that was full of playfulness and what Daryl thought could be mild flirting. He moved a leg under the blanket and gently shoved at her shin.

 

“Smartass”

*****

When the credits rolled, Lexie had completely relaxed. Her muscles slackened and her eyes grew heavy, the half a bottle of whiskey they had managed to get through now making everything hazy and blurred. She had turned onto her side, her head rested on the arm of the sofa, facing the TV and one leg had crept, ever so slowly between Daryl’s under the blanket.

Daryl had missed the end of the movie, the sight of a sleepy and probably slightly drunk Lexie draped over the arm providing him with something far more interesting to look at. With her hair messed up and falling loose from her ponytail and her eyes sparkling in the light of the TV, he had given up trying to shift his attention from her a long time ago. Especially now, as an increasing warmth was forming along his inner thigh where her foot had somehow ended up. He thanked his lucky stars for the blanket that was successfully managing to hide the large bulge in the front of his jeans. He had struggled with the feeling of guilt it gave him, for thinking of her in such a way so soon, but it was something he just couldn’t push away no matter how much he tried and it had confirmed that what he felt for her now stretched way beyond that of a simple friendship.

Unlike his brother, or the bikers from the bar he had by and large grew up in, sex wasn’t ever at the forefront of Daryl’s mind. That was, until he met Faith. Far be it for him to follow in his older brother’s footsteps and end a night’s drinking and doing meth with a prostitute, a stripper or a drunk girl from the bar. More often than not, he would go home alone and he liked it like that. On the odd occasion, he had been loath to go against Merle when he was forcing him to take a girl home, calling him all manner of homophobic slurs if he expressed his disinterest and so, he had yielded here and there in order to lead as quiet a life as possible. He would never let a woman stay over and sleep next to him, nor would he ever stick around at someone else’s place. He made little conversation while still managing to be respectful enough to those women that weren’t drunk or high enough to come off as plain irritating.

He had grown up with a female childhood friend, Jen. Who, as the years progressed had blossomed into a younger, prettier version of her stripper mother and unsurprisingly had also taken up the same career choice. He had lost his virginity to her and slept with her intermittently for years, all the while feeling nothing but a fondness for her company and a mutual understanding of what it was like to grow up in an abusive household. When she disappeared for a number of years, her return brought with it a confession of her love for him and a broken nose from Faith, who had witnessed her attempt to steal him away from her. Daryl had been oblivious and was stunned to discover that he hadn’t been as unnoticed by the female species as he’d first thought. He gained himself a reputation as being mysterious and secretive, garnering him attention that he rarely noticed and never took advantage of.

Meeting Faith had changed everything for him. He had gone from pinning no emotions to any of his sexual encounters to feeling everything all at once after having found the right person, or more her finding him and it made his head spin. Now she was gone, he was back to square one, or so he thought. The woman laid opposite him on the couch, with her foot pressed against his inner thigh had brought everything back to the forefront again. He had always maintained to Faith that a relationship was something he had just accepted was never going to happen for him and she had proved him wrong. He considered that maybe, just maybe, Lexie might be his second shot. If only it were as easy as that.

“Sorry, I’m taking up all the room.” She murmured while slowly dragging her foot back from between his legs.

“Nah. I’m good. Stay where ya are.” He urged.

 _As much as I'm enjoying this, I wish I’d worn sweatpants._ He thought.

She slid her foot back into place and rolled onto her back, stretching her arms up over her head and yawning dramatically. Her top raised, revealing a slither of flesh across her stomach and Daryl didn’t even bother to look away. He didn’t know if it was the drink that had caused such a testosterone fuelled reaction in him, but what he did know was that she was perfect and he wanted to touch her so badly.

Lexie leaned back and looked at Daryl down her nose as he reached out and took hold of the whiskey bottle, unscrewing the cap and filling their glasses again. He passed one to her and placed the bottle back on the floor beside the table leg. Lexie took the glass and bit her lip as she stared at him.

“Trying to get me drunk?” She asked.

Daryl took a large gulp and screwed his face up for a second as the burning subsided in his throat.

“Don’t give me that shit. This was your idea.” He shot back, gently waving his glass in the air in front of him as he spoke. “More like you trying to get me drunk.”

All she could think about was how close her foot was to him, lined up along his left thigh and thrumming with warmth that sent a sexual energy spiralling between them. It would be so easy to just slide it forwards, inch by inch until…no. That’s the kind of thing Mel would do. Lexie wasn’t anywhere near as bold. She had taken control of the few sexual experiences she’d had mainly because she had only gone through with them for all the wrong reasons, but she was by no means confident in enticing Daryl. At least that was what she was telling herself, but the positioning of her foot contradicted her own opinion on the matter. Maybe, just maybe, she was braver than she gave herself credit for. 

“Maybe I am.” She responded as she glared at him over the top of her glass.

His eyebrows flicked up for a second as a look of wonder passed across his features and he bit down on his bottom lip. He cleared his throat awkwardly and lowered his head, his eyes scanning her. She was looking right at him and for the few, silent seconds it took for it to sink in, she inched her foot closer to him and his erection raged in his jeans as he realised…she was toying with him.

 

The door slammed open and Mel tumbled through the hall, crashing to the floor with a hysterical Aaron following behind her. He scooped up a pink stiletto that had worked its way loose from her foot as she fell and he had to lean on the doorframe of the living room to steady himself as laughter boomed from his chest. Tears streamed down his face, his arm was raised as he pointed wordlessly at Mel and continued to laugh.

Mel’s hair was stuck to her lip gloss when she managed to turn herself over on the floor and glower back at Aaron. She punched the floor with her fist before hauling herself to her feet and staggering about uneasily on the spot while Aaron wiped tears from his eyes with his sleeve.

Lexie shot back on the couch, snatched her foot away from Daryl's crotch and stood up so quickly her head felt like it had hollowed out. Mel noticed her as she stood and whipped out a hand, pointing at her.

“Sssexy Lexie!” She bellowed

“Don’t call me that.” Lexie retorted.

“Ssssexy Lexie!”

“Stop it.”

Daryl sat quietly and observed what he knew was going to be chaos unfolding in front of him. Part of him wanted to get up and leave, but there was no way he was going home without at least trying to say goodnight to Lexie.

“Sssister!” Mel cried. “I lost the game! The drinking game! Then Aaron opened the door and I fell in!”

“Flat on her face.” Aaron chuckled to himself.

“Hmm” Lexie hummed, crossing her arms in front of her and rounding the couch so she could see them both clearly. Aaron was struggling to contain another round of giggles as he clamped a hand over his mouth. “How much did you guys drink?! Daryl and I have done almost a bottle of whiskey and we’re not as bad as you two.”

“Daryl is here?!” Mel shrieked. “Where is he?! Oh! There he is! Hi Daryl! Daryl Daryl Diiiiixon Alexandria’s sssexiest redneck. Hit me up baby. Room number one, top of the stairs. I got my own bathroom. Ballin’. Oh, oh shit, I forgot you guys are bangin’ now. I’m so sorry.” She endeavoured to fire a sexy wink at him, but what emerged was a demonstration of what it looked like when someone caught a glimpse of themselves in the back of a spoon.

Lexie threw an angry look Aaron’s way before approaching her sister and taking hold of her wrists.

“Mel, shut up. C’mon, you need water and sleep.” She growled.

“Is that Ragtime Rye?!” Mel exclaimed, pointing to the whiskey bottle on the floor. “It is! Oh my goooood, do you remember that time, Lexie? When we stole a bottle from, from daddy and and then- and then went to that club?!”

Lexie’s stomach clenched. _Oh god. Not this._

“Yes, I remember.” She snapped as she tried to push Mel’s drunken weight out into the hall. It was turning out to be a lot more difficult than she had anticipated due to Mel’s intense intoxication, no doubt courtesy of Aaron, who was now buckled over, bracing himself on the door frame with one hand still clutching Mel’s shoe as he roared with laughter. Mel’s announcement about the brand of whiskey had peaked Daryl’s interest and he had now risen from his seat and perched on the arm of the couch.

“I made you wear those heels, do you remember? And those leather pants. I still have those. You did the dancing! You did! You got up on the- on the podium thingy and shook that ass of yours…”

“Mel, shut up.” Lexie hissed

“…like you was workin’ for food stamps! Woo! Ssshakin’ the moneymaker! That’s how we found out how you got legs like a frickin gymnast and an ass that’s better than mine! You- you fooled uss alllll! You be creepin’ the college halls going to fuckin hip hop classsss- classes on the sly! Oh…oh, then the man, the man with the gold teeth, he tried to take you home! Tried to offer you four hundred dollars to sleep with him. Like you weren’t worth at least a grand! Hahahaha!”

Aaron had now stopped laughing and was exchanging a shocked glance with Daryl. Lexie huffed loudly, her chest filling with rage and humiliation as she bundled Mel over to the stairs. Daryl could hear Mel yelling at the top of her lungs.

“AARON! You got me drunk!”

Her other shoe came flying through the room and collided with Aaron’s shoulder followed by a high pitched, triumphant cackle from the stairwell where Lexie was now literally shoving Mel up the steps on all fours with a stony look on her face.

Aaron picked up the shoe and placed them both on the backrest of the couch while he released a relieved sigh and ran a hand over his face.

“Remind me never to play never have I ever with her again.” He commented. “You guys have a good night?”

Daryl could see the true meaning behind his question and decided to skirt around it, wanting his time with Lexie to remain between them.

“Not as wild as you by the look of the state of her.” He replied.

“Yeah, figured it was time to bring her home when she asked me if I’m sure I’m gay, right in front of Eric. She’s a handful.” He laughed.

“Got that right.” Daryl agreed.

“I should head back. Although I have to admit I almost want to stay and find out more about Lexie and her leather and heels.” Aaron quipped, testing Daryl’s reaction.

He nodded slowly and thoughtfully, apparently as surprised as Aaron was to find out that Lexie hadn’t always been such a shrinking violet and had actually been persuaded to emerge out of her comfort zone once or twice by her sister. He slipped his feet into his boots and adjusted his vest.

“Yeah.” Was all he managed to say.

“Anyway, I’m going before Lexie tries to murder me. Enjoy the rest of your night, man.” Aaron said sincerely, patting Daryl on the shoulder as he passed.

“Stop right there.” Lexie called out to him as she reached the bottom of the stairs. Aaron turned in front of the door and held his hands up.

“OK, it was my fault, I take full responsibility. But she was hilarious tonight.” He confessed. “If it’s any consolation, Eric is flat out on the sofa with a bucket next to him.”

“You are a bad influence.” Lexie said, wagging a finger at him and eventually getting close enough to jab him in the chest with it.

“Not as much as Ragtime Rye, apparently.” He laughed, ducking and avoiding her attempt at slapping him playfully.

“Get out” she giggled as he opened the door and quickly leaned forwards, pecking her on the cheek.

When the door closed, Lexie found herself still stood in front of it, examining the grain pattern on the wood instead of turning to Daryl. She couldn’t take seeing his reaction to the highly embarrassing story her sister had revealed in her intoxicated state, knowing it was likely to have shocked him. She had fallen into some minor lapses in judgement in the past and was guilty of being easily led by Mel on the odd occasion which had without fail ended up in some kind of horrendous situation every single time. Lexie had learned through this not to be a Mel, it wasn’t for her and she couldn’t deal with the fear that she would wake up with after a night out on the town or at a party she’d been talked into attending

Daryl had re-filled both of their glasses and was now wandering over to her. She hadn’t even noticed him move, but he had concluded that she needed a top up.

“Here” He rasped from behind her.

She gradually turned and took hold of the glass, her fingers brushing over his knuckles as she took it from his grip. She knocked the whole thing back in one go and sighed instead of wincing or even blinking. Daryl wondered how she managed it with such a strong whiskey but felt comfortable in the knowledge that she wouldn’t allow herself to get as bad as Mel was.

“Um…” He started “Y’know Im’ma ask, right?”

“Jesus” She grumbled under her breath.

“A podium?” He smiled.

“Oh god.” She groaned, swerving around him and thumping up the stairs. Daryl stayed put, unsure if he was meant to follow her or if she had decided she was completely done with the entire night. She paused halfway up and glanced over her shoulder.

“You wanna know or not? C’mon. Bring the bottle.” she said.

 

In her room, she lit some candles for light, having used most of the nightly electricity supply for the TV and not wanting to take advantage. She then opened the window to let Poe in before flopping down on her bed, face up as Daryl filled her glass on the night stand. He set off ambling around the room and eventually settled in a chair in the corner, one leg propped up on the other by his ankle. He balanced his glass on his knee with his fingers lightly clasped around it.

“I was kiddin’ y’know, ya don’t gotta tell me nothin’.” He told her.

“So, you’re just trying to get into my bedroom, then?” she jested.

“Yeah” he answered without hesitation, earning him a laugh from her.

She sat herself up and scooted backwards, settling with her back against the headrest and picked up her glass. She kept her eyes lowered to the liquid inside, swirling the golden hues around that were highlighted by the flickering lights of the candles.

“I’ll tell you, I trust you. I always carried this anger around with me. Part of being given away like a bag of clothes to goodwill when I was a kid. I tried all sorts of stuff to keep in check. Yoga, Meditation, Mindfulness.” She explained. “But none of that shit worked. I needed something more…intense. Tried boxing. But I didn’t fair so well when I refused to get in a ring with another woman and couldn’t find a guy that was willing to spar with me. The feminist in me kinda shot me in the foot with that. So, I ended up at hip hop classes.”

She glanced up at him and gave him a small smile when she saw how enthralled he was by her story. He was totally still except for one finger that was tracing up and down his glass at the side.

“I was good. I won awards, performed at a lot of shows. I think everyone that knew me expected me to sit in a black, painted room listening to Marylin Manson and sacrificing virgins in my spare time or something. But I love Hip Hop. I love Manson too, but I’m not narrow minded enough not to give everything a chance. Never told Mel or our parents. Until that night. Ahh shit. That night. We got so drunk she convinced me to go to a club with her, a fucking hip hop club. I don’t even remember much, but she remembers every detail. How I danced in those shoes, I have no idea. Like wearing stilts. I'm pretty sure they were only designed to be worn in bed, if you know what I mean. Then there were those leather pants…Holy crap.” She giggled, hiding her face behind her hand.

Daryl smirked and took a drink. He positioned his glass in the same place as before.

“I was so hungover the next day I actually toyed with the idea of calling an ambulance. I stopped letting Mel talk me into going out with her after that.” She concluded.

“Bet ya looked good though.” He stated quietly from the corner.

“I don’t know about that. More like some drunk, white girl with bad fashion sense.” She laughed, seeing Daryl do the same from the shadows.

“Gotta say, I’m surprised.” He admitted. “Ya still dancing before the turn happened?”

“Yeah, as secretly as possible. Was a good way of keeping my fitness up.” She replied.

He got to his feet and moved to the bed, sitting opposite her and leaning back against the rail at the bottom. He drew one leg up and draped an arm over it, swirling his whiskey in the glass with the other.

“Lot about ya I don’t know, huh?” He asked.

She shrugged subtly. “Guess so.”

“Thought you were just real quiet at first. Like a mouse or somethin’.”

“A mouse? Pick a prettier animal.” She smiled, throwing back another gulp. She estimated that her stomach was beginning to resemble a whirlpool of pure whiskey and her head was fuzzy enough for her to feel her inhibitions lowering.

“What, like a rabbit?” He suggested.

“You find rabbits pretty?” She joked, catching his eye.

“You’re the one thinks animals are attractive!” he protested, reaching out with his leg and prodding her calf gently with his toe. “The fuck outta here with that shit.”

A wide smile had emerged on his face and he ducked his head shyly, as if trying to shield it from her. She loved it when he smiled like this. It was so very rare, but it was always when they were teasing one another, in the middle of banter or when she’d said something that she had no idea was funny to him. His smile and laugh were an insightful thing to witness for her. She found his need to hide himself away both interesting and slightly sad when it was one of the most physically engaging things about him.

“You have a gorgeous smile.” She blurted out, her eyes widening at the sound of the words emerging from her mouth.

 _OK, so I'm just saying the first thing that pops into my head now._ _That’s enough booze._

She lowered her gaze and grit her teeth, slowly reaching out and sliding the glass onto the night stand.

“Stop” She heard him say. His tone wasn’t too serious, as if he was accepting the compliment but showing her that he wasn’t totally comfortable with it for some reason. She braved a peek at him, his hair had dropped in front of his face and his ears had become awash with a deep shade of pink. He threw back the rest of his drink and began picking at a frayed hole in his jeans.

She cursed herself internally for coming out with such a plain and blatant comment so suddenly instead of working it into the right moment, picking it wisely so as not to embarrass him but the damage was done and she hoped he wasn’t mad at her for making him blush.

“Should probably go” he mumbled.

“OK” She replied. The urge to argue against him overwhelming.

He shuffled off the bed and headed to the window, intending to climb down from the perch. His idea of leaving the house under the cover of darkness and from the back was something she was in agreement with. Only Aaron, Eric, Carol and Mel knew how things had progressed so far and questions from anyone else would place unnecessary and unwanted pressure on their decision to take things slowly.

Lexie followed him to the window and regarded him with bafflement when he appeared to stop and become as still as a statue for a few moments. She knew he did this when he was thinking something through and so she waited. When he turned to face her, they were parted by mere centimetres, candlelight flitting in the thin space between them. Lexie peered up at him.

“Heard what ya said, ‘bout me. In the pantry.” He uttered.

Her breath hitched and she swallowed hard. She started to frantically search for a way to explain herself but admitted defeat instantly when she remembered exactly what she had said and the context it had been in.

“Oh.” She squeaked.

“Wasn’t gonna bring it up. I just…” he trailed off, dipping his head momentarily before sighing deeply and scratching nervously at the back of his neck with one hand and an air of confusion about him. “…ya really think that?”

Lexie pursed her lips and tilted her head to one side as if deep in thought. Really, she wasn’t. She knew without a doubt that her description of Daryl as ‘fine as fuck’ was more than accurate and she had meant every single word.

“Y-Yes.” She said quietly. “You weren’t meant to hear that. It’s a not a big deal, honestly. You get compliments from Mel too-”

“-It is a big deal if it’s comin’ from you.” He interrupted.

Lexie let her eyes drop from his and she braved another step forward, pressing her chest to him. He inhaled sharply at the contact and she noted it as an involuntary action as she took advantage of the alcohol in her veins, the confidence it had brought out in her that revealed It was always there, she just needed a little alcoholic encouragement. She found his hands and ever so gently intertwined their fingers. He responded with apprehension at first, but she soon found he was holding onto her with a fair amount of grip. Her forehead connected with his shoulder and she tilted her head to the side, so close to his neck that he could feel her warm breath on his skin.

“Lexie” he breathed

It wasn’t a protest in the slightest, her name had left his lips before he could stop it. He tightened the pressure around her fingers, slowly raising their arms either side of them and stopping when they were chest height on either side. He inched open his hands, allowing her fingers to find a more comfortable position between his.

“Were you going to kiss me? In the kitchen?” She whispered

He ghosted his jawline over her forehead, lowering their hands again and hearing a fleeting whimper from her as she exhaled against him. Her breasts were pushed to his chest, her hips level with his own and he tried to ground himself, tried not to let things go too far but everything in his body was screaming at him to kiss her and back her up to the bed.

“Was thinkin’ about it.” He admitted.

“You don’t want to?” She asked, working her way into the crook of his neck.

Shivers ran down his spine, his head angled upwards and his eyes shot up to the ceiling when her lips grazed the skin of his neck, sending jolts through his nerves and setting his mind alight. She wasn't kissing him, but he could sense her smiling against him, into the side of his neck and he didn’t care if she was manipulating him. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he hoped she was. Already under her spell, he wanted to see what else she had in store, where she would take this, how far she would go. He let out a strained breath, holding her tighter still and noticing how hard she was making him.

 _Fuck._ He thought _She knows how turned you are now._

“You know I did” Was all he could manage.

Lexie was aware of her ability to seduce but wished she’d had more practice before being able to use it on someone she actually liked. So far, her self-doubt had been kept at bay by the whiskey and for the time being, she was hoping it would stay that way. The sensation of his hands tight around hers, the hardness in his jeans pushed against her and the sound of his shallow breaths only spurred her on. But her thoughts were jumbled, would she regret this when she was sober? Was it all too soon? He hadn’t kissed her yet for a reason, but she could tell he was fighting with everything he had not to give her what she was seeking. She levelled her lips with his ear.

“I want you to kiss me.” She purred

“Lexie…I…” He tried, his voice now barely a croak because he was too busy thinking about one of her hands, which had now worked it’s way free of him and was tickling up his bare, muscular arm from his wrist, unhurriedly, deliberately, leisurely. His head turned to her as she drew back slightly, her big eyes filling his soul with desire.

“Gotta take this slow.” He attempted to reason. Her hand had reached his shoulder and she journeyed it down his chest, around his waist and pressed it into the small of his back while tilting her pelvis into him. Everything from his waist down exploded with pleasure and a powerful craving for her and he witnessed a devilish smile wash over her face.

“Uuuh fuck… Lexie, you gotta stop.” He panted.

“Doesn’t feel like you want me to stop.” She hummed at him.

_What are you doing? Do you really want this to go that far right now?_

There it was. The doubt. It was small, tiny even, but still significant. Lexie’s real worry would be when things got past this point. When clothes were being shed and she would be exposed in every sense of the word and she wasn’t sure she was ready for that yet. But as she stood there with pure lust flooding her body, she at least wanted to give it a try.

She was right, it didn’t feel like he wanted her to stop and he was definitely averse to pulling away, but he knew it was the right thing to do. He didn’t want to rush in and end up hurting her in the long run because he didn’t give himself time to adjust, to manage the guilt, to gain some closure when it came to Faith. His free hand had slid around her waist without him even realising and his fingertips were digging into her flesh now that she had acknowledged his erection and was using it to wind him up.

“That's your fault.” He told her. “You’re doin all this.”

“Just like you did, in the armoury and downstairs. Don’t act like you want me to stop.” She grinned, letting go of his other hand and feeling it around his neck, lacing her fingers into the back of his hair. He blinked slowly as his lips parted further.

“Shit, we're drunk. I don’t want ya to stop, but you gotta…please.” He begged.

_I don’t know if I have the strength to fight this anymore_

She lifted her hand from his back and brought it to his face as she pulled back, disconnecting their bodies and running a thumb along his jawline.

“I meant what I said to Mel. You are a _fine_ -looking man” She grinned, biting her bottom lip completely unaware that her comment had very nearly broken him, virtually pushed him over the edge and resulted in him tearing every item of her clothing off. But he held onto the shred of logic that was still present amongst all the dopamine rushing through his brain.

“Thanks” He laughed gently, dropping his head and connecting his forehead to hers. “I really should go.”

“So, go. I’m not stopping you.” She said. Though he couldn’t see her face, he could tell she was still smiling. He made a mental note to try and decipher in the morning whether her behaviour was because she had a part in the bottle of whiskey they had almost finished, or because she had merely found the courage to do as she pleased. Right now, his head was too clouded with lust and booze for him to even begin to pick apart the details.

“I’m goin’.” He whispered, remaining still.

Lexie laughed a small, giddy laugh and stepped back, taking her hands away from him and giving him an imaginary nudge in the right direction. He looked up and locked eyes with her.

_No, she’s not that drunk. She knows what she’s doing. Right?_

“Alright” He sighed, rubbing a hand over his face and turning to the window. “I’m goin’, I’m goin’.”

She giggled as she watched him climb out of the window and pace back and forth for a few seconds outside on the roof. She figured he was composing himself in the fresh air before using the ladder after all the alcohol and their close encounter. He stopped and stared at her, his whole body facing her. She nibbled her thumbnail. He started to back up as he spoke, but Lexie heard it as clear as crystal.

“Drivin’ me fuckin’ crazy.”

 *****

 

Lexie woke up face down on her pillow, still fully clothed and feeling like she’d been eating sand all night. She blindly grappled with the contents of the nightstand, her hand bumping over the box of tissues, a book, her sketch pad and the glass from last night. She groaned in disgust at the thought of more whiskey and tried the other side, finally finding a bottle of water. She lugged her body up from the mattress and ripped off the cap of the bottle, downing the whole thing in one go. She sucked in a deep breath once she’d drained the bottle and blinked the sleep from her eyes, looking around the room and seeing several burned out candles. Since she’d opened her eyes she had tried to remember the events from the previous night to no avail due to her attention being distracted by her dehydration. As she rubbed her hands over her face and brought herself into the present, everything suddenly flashed back in front of her eyes in a series of vivid frames like a comic book and she gasped, her hands closing over the top of her head like she was trying to hold the memories in before they vanished and she was none the wiser.

_You hit on Daryl last night._

“Oh, shit.” She cussed, flapping her hands down on the sheets in frustration.

She sat up further, resting back on the headboard and hugged her knees. She remembered it all now. Holding his hands, whispering in his ear, making him hard and teasing him. Her mouth quirked into a smile and she buried her head in the space between her body and her knees.

“Oh my gooooooood” She groaned.

 

 

She didn’t panic when she found Mel’s bed unoccupied. She marched into the room having showered, dressed and overcome her hangover in record time and made her way to the window. She threw back the drapes, the brilliant sunlight beaming through the white-walled space and she stepped over Mel’s discarded clothes on the floor, taking hold of the bathroom door handle and slamming it open.

Mel recoiled on the cold, hard floor and hissed loudly like a vampire in a cage that was about to burst into flames. Her body crumpled and scrambled backwards, folding in on its self. She was dressed in only her underwear, her hair was matted to her face and the whole room had the sticky, pungent smell of vomit. Lexie swiped a towel from the rail behind her and threw it at her before stepping over her and switching the shower on.

“Oh fuck oooooooff!” Mel complained.

“Nope. Get up. Get in the shower. I have to talk to you about something.” Lexie instructed.

“Can’t it wait? I’m dying. Let me die.” She protested.

Lexie huffed in irritation and crouched down to her level. She waited for Mel to make eye contact. When she had finished plucking away strands of hair that had been suck to her face with vomit and saliva, she finally looked at Lexie.

“You weren’t the only one that got drunk last night. Daryl and I did a bottle of whiskey and almost kissed. Well, almost did a hell of a lot more than that too. I need to talk to someone about it and seeing as Aaron is probably indisposed peeling Eric up off their bathroom floor much like I’m having to do to you, it’s going to have to be you that I use to help me make sense of this.” She informed her.

Mel blinked up at her through blackened eyes, her jaw hung slack and Lexie thought she saw her drooling at one point.

“OK. I’m getting up.” She suddenly sighed “Piss off and give me some privacy. But don’t go too far with that golden gossip you got right there.”

 _I knew that’d get your ass moving._ She thought.

 

 

Over an hour had passed and Lexie had cleared away any sight and scent of booze, made breakfast and coffee and wandered to Olivia’s place and back again to ask her to swap armoury shifts. When Mel emerged wearing one of Aarons hoodies with the hood up and her hands hidden in the large front pocket, Lexie knew she was going to feel like absolute garbage all day. Her own hangover was now long gone and aside from some initial tiredness, she felt like herself again. She wondered how Daryl must have felt but guessed she would probably find out when she ventured out in the afternoon for work.

She poured Mel a large mug of coffee from the pot and slid it over to her along with a bowl of cereal and powdered milk. Mel wrinkled her nose and pushed it away, only to have it shoved back at her along with a stern look from her sister. She rolled her eyes and began munching through it, piece by piece with Lexie watching her every mouthful.

“I feel like someone crept into my room last night, took my eyeballs out, turned them around the wrong way and popped them right back in.” Mel mumbled.

“That’s why you’re going to eat every scrap of that cereal, drink your coffee and then you’re going to wash it all down with this.” Lexie announced, reaching behind her and grabbing something. She slapped a litre bottle of water on the island top and gave Mel a serious look.

“Fine, but while I do that, you’re going to tell me everything that happened last night. C’mon, let’s have it” Mel demanded, waving a hand in the air.

“Well, before you arrived home and told Daryl to meet you in your room-” Lexie started

“-I fucking didn’t.” Mel cut in

“You fucking did.”

“I’m so sorry.” She whined through a mouthful of cereal.

“Yeah, I’m sure. Anyway, we had this moment. He held my hand, almost kissed me. It was, well it was amazing. Then we watched a movie and over the space of like three hours we drank three quarters of the bottle of Ragtime Rye-“

“Ragtime Rye? That’s what we drank when-“ Mel interrupted again.

“Oh my god. Shut up, shut up, shut up! You told Aaron and Daryl that story last night along with the fact that some asshole offered me $400 to sleep with him.”

Mel sat, shell-shocked in front of her with her mouth open and her eyes gaping in disbelief. She thought it was like someone else’s actions were being explained to her, having barely being able to remember having her first drink at Aaron and Eric’s place after the meeting. The whole night had been a blur until she had been woken up on the bathroom floor by blazing sunshine and Lexie throwing a towel at her.

“Oh shit. I didn’t?! I’m so sorry.” She gasped.

“Stop saying sorry or I will throw this coffee in your face.” Lexie warned.

“Right. Continue.”

“Anyway, we went to my room. I’m pretty drunk by this point but nowhere near as bad as you. You were on the big, white telephone straight away. I got all confident and sassy and before I know it…” She paused, not knowing what words to use to convey the situation and do it justice. She had never had to explain such a thing to anyone before, having kept her previous encounters well under the radar.  

Mel leaned forwards in her seat and banged her fists on the surface impatiently. “Ohmygodwhatjusttellme”

“…before I know it I’m pushed against him, whispering stuff in his ear and he’s hard and neither of us wanted to stop and it was so intense even though we didn’t even kiss and I think, I think he’s going to think I did it because I was drunk and I didn’t I mean I was drunk but I did it because he’s hot and I really like him-“

Mel held her hands up to silence Lexie, worried she might faint if she didn’t take a breath soon.

“-Good lord, take a frickin' breath, girl. Relax! It’s fine! You got to rub up against Daryl. You did a good thing.” She said, rolling her eyes.

“I did?” Lexie prodded.

“Sure. Bet your bottom dollar there was nothing else on his mind but you when he was alone in his room with his hand in his pants. If you get my drift.” Mel winked.

“Jesus. Why do I even talk to you?” Lexie muttered.

“I’m proud of you.” Mel grinned. “He’s so into you. The whole aim is to leave him begging for more and from the sound of it, you did exactly that.” She told her, shovelling another mouthful of cereal into her mouth and crunching loudly. Her hood had slipped down her head and she quickly pulled it back up, the intensity of the morning light still being a little too much to bare.

“I’m not going to lie to you, Lex. I’m real jealous. Dude’s fuckin hot. Bet he’s packin’ something serious in those jeans too, huh?”

“Will you please stop that?!” Lexie exclaimed. “Contrary to your beliefs, some things need to remain sacred.”

“Oh, come on! That kind of information is standard girl talk.” Mel argued, downing her coffee and reluctantly opening the bottle of water.

“I’m not a standard girl” Lexie retorted.

Mel grinned at her sister and reached out, brushing a strand of hair from her face.

“You got that right. You aint no basic bitch.”

They smiled at one another, Lexie wishing that Mel’s soft and affectionate side was more prevalent than her mildly irritating, self-obsessed side. Underneath it all, she was loyal, loving and Lexie’s biggest cheerleader.

“I guess I resigned myself to a life of pining when I let you have him.” Mel sighed.  

“Excuse me?! You ‘let me have him?’ It was me he liked all along you egotistical airhead.” Lexie pointed out, pushing the bottle of water closer to her as a reminder that she had to drink the whole thing before she was going to be allowed to leave.

“Sticks and stones, Lex. Sticks and stones. Seriously, now all you gotta do is wear something short and tight that leaves hardly anything to the imagination.” Mel suggested.

Lexie was sure that Daryl would probably give in and sleep with her at the drop of a hat if she pulled the same moves on him again. That was if his reaction the previous night was anything to go by. While she had no doubt that when it happened it would be amazing, there was a lot more involved in what was going on between them.

“It’s not just about that. This is complicated, he’s lost the love of his life and I’m her doppelgänger so we’re taking this one step at a time.” Lexie affirmed.

“You’re her dopple-what? What is that? Some kind of freaky ass circus act with midgets?”

Lexie’s eyebrows pinched together in sheer confusion at Mel’s train of thought on occasions.

“Mel, what did we say about words you don’t know? Don’t guess them out loud. You’re going to offend someone. It means her double. He thinks I look a lot like the woman he was with before the turn.”

“Do you look like her?”

“Yes, I do.” She admitted. “But she was very beautiful.”

“So are you.” Mel shot at her, earning her a small smile from her sister. “You think that’s why he’s so taken with you?”

“I thought it was at first, but I don’t think so now. I can see it in the way he looks at me. He’s looking past her and seeing me. Last night, he was definitely seeing me. But it's kinda scary. There’s the fact that I may as well be a fucking virgin.” She complained.

“But you’re not. Did you just lay there like a sack of potatoes with Tyler and Stevie?” Mel questioned.

“Hell no. If I was going to do it, it was going to be my way.”

Mel giggled and took a large gulp of water.

“Hah, maybe you and I aren’t so different.” She said, gesturing to Lexie with the bottle.

“Ew, Mel.”

“Sorry, sorry. Look, stop overthinking it all. Just go with it and play it cool. Let it happen. You’re not a virgin, you’re super-duper pretty and we both know he’s spends a large portion of the day staring at you and he got all turned on when you touched him. All the signs are there. It’s a recipe for success.”

Lexie shook her head and tried to hide an embarrassed smile behind her hands which were covered with her jacket sleeves. Yes, Mel could be crass and she overstepped the boundaries all the time, but Lexie was sure she wouldn’t have her any other way.

*****

The fine lines of her sketch were failing to produce the desired effect, the shape of one section of the drawing compromised by her distracted mindset as she sat outside the armoury on the wall. She could hear Sasha and Maggie at the gate talking quietly to Eugene, who had spent so much time looking at her that she was actually staring to get used to it. Aaron and Eric were planting herbs in wooden boxes outside Deanna’s place and Lexie had smiled politely at various other people as they milled about the community during the afternoon.

Her long, black, off the shoulder top was possibly the worst choice of clothing in the current weather but she had little else in her closet that wasn’t either black of carried some kind of offensive slogan on the front and now she was a neighbour to little Judith, she figured parading around with obscenities on her front to be against the child’s best interests. She unzippered a pocket on the side of her pants and dug around for her eraser. Finding it, she rubbed it over the entire section that she had created while being sat there, resulting in a considerable part of the image being wiped out. Its was ok, she told herself, she could do better than that.  

She looked up to see Eugene awkwardly stepping over to her holding two glasses and Sasha and Maggie observing from being him, exchanging excited glances. She quickly shut her sketchpad and shoved her pencil and eraser into her pocket. As her gaze raised back to the road, she could see Aaron had stopped what he was doing and was also watching.  

 _Oh god._ She thought.

Eugene stopped in front of her and looked down at the glasses in his hands as he spoke in a drawn out, southern ramble.

“Good afternoon Miss Lexie. I was wonderin’ if on this hot summer day, you’d be inclined to accept my proposal of a cooling refreshment in the form of some Lemonade. Of course, if that is contrary to your particular tastes I can run on back to the pantry and acquire you something a little less citrus infused.”

Lexie’s stomach exploded with butterflies when she saw Daryl passing by on the other side of the street, heading towards Aaron. He wore a black sleeveless shirt and his leather vest over the top, his big arms on display as usual. Her ears heard the words that Eugene was saying, but her brain was focusing on Daryl. She could see the puzzled look on his face as he caught sight of her.

“I’m sorry, what?” Lexie blinked at Eugene.

“Um. Would you like some Lemonade?” He asked.

Her eyes flicked from Daryl back to Eugene and it dawned on her that had a crush on her that she had forgotten about for a brief period of time. She assumed Sasha and Maggie had talked him into approaching her and trying to spend some time with her. Daryl stopped next to Aaron and they both looked on, Aaron with amusement and Daryl with what she could only describe as an unimpressed and baffled expression.

“Yes. I would, thank you.” She said, taking a glass from Eugene. “Please, sit.” She offered.

Daryl was wondering what the hell it was he was looking at. Much like him, Lexie was known for avoiding people as much as she could in an effort to avoid small talk and meaningless, time wasting chit chat. So, out of everyone, he couldn’t figure out why she would want to have a conversation with the likes of Eugene who was almost impossible to understand and had a way of using way too many words just for the sake of it.

“Did you make this?” Lexie asked Eugene.

“Affirmative. I derived a little inspiration from seeing your sister handing out refreshments the other day. I am well versed in making a variety of very specific things in the kitchen. Although boiling an egg still escapes me.”

Lexie laughed gently and sipped the cool drink in her hand. It was good. If she could get anything out of this, the free lemonade was going to be a bonus.

“I can’t do that either. But I can make a good pot roast.” She confessed.

“I would surely like to try that one day” Eugene replied, keeping his vision on the street ahead, too nervous to look her way.

“If I ever have the ingredients, I’ll let you know.” Lexie offered.

 

Daryl was trying his absolute best not to come across as too concerned by the sight that befell him. But Aaron could see his jaw tighten and his shoulders tense and was both surprised and somewhat pleased that his reaction was one of mild jealousy. It only confirmed Daryl’s interest in his best friend.

“The hell she doin?” Daryl grumbled.

“She’s talking to Eugene” Aaron answered.

“She don’t just talk to folks like that though, right?” He asked, knowing that Aaron knew more about Lexie than he did after having spent so many months building up a solid friendship with her before he even arrived at Alexandria.  

“She’s Introverted, Daryl. She’s not an asshole.” He quipped.  

Daryl just grunted and continued to watch as Lexie laughed and chatted breezily to Eugene. “He’s had a thing for her since he first saw her.”

“And you haven’t?” Aaron reminded him.  

Another grunt followed his observation but this time he offered no words.

“Looks like Eugene has a little encouragement” Aaron continued, nodding in Sasha and Maggie’s direction. The two women were giggling and whispering.

“He’s not a threat, man.” Aaron said to Daryl.

His defences immediately went up and he visibly jolted away from Aaron, his brow furrowed and his eyes narrowed.

“I know that. Shut up.” He scoffed.

 

“Uh, Miss Lexie. Would you be so kind as to grace me with your presence one evening for an alcoholic beverage? Abraham, while he is a little protective over his stash is well equipped with a number of small bottles of hard liquor that I can imagine would be enough to knock one on one’s ass. Not that I am implying that is your date of choice, no ma’am. I would however, be most respectful and grateful for your accompaniment.”

_Ah crap. How am I going to get out of this?_

Lexie finished her drink and struggled to think of a reply that would mean she wasn’t just prolonging this until a later date. Eugene had been polite to her and hadn’t given her a reason to think him a bad person, even if she did hate his haircut. A business at the front, party at the back 80’s throwback that always left her a little perturbed whenever she saw him. She needed to say something that was both true and that told him that she really wasn’t interested without hurting his feelings. Just how honest she was, even surprised her when it came out.

“That’s a nice offer. But, I can’t. I’m actually seeing someone. Kind of. So, I guess I’m unavailable I’m sorry.” She apologised

Eugene sat still, his eyes still focused on everything that wasn’t her. At this particular moment, it was the floor of the road in front of them.

“Oh. I understand and appreciate your honesty.” He said simply.  

“We can be friends though.” She suggested.

“Of course. I would be most privileged and may I say that the gentleman that has your attention is one lucky son of a gun.”

She chuckled and almost felt the strange and unfamiliar urge to hug him. “thank you, Eugene.”

 

Daryl had remained in the same spot for the entire duration of the conversation, even when Aaron had retreated and resumed his work with Eric, who had motioned with his eyes to the stern and prickly redneck, watching the girl across the street. Aaron had merely shaken his head and told him that he would tell him later.

When he left Lexie, Eugene walked back over to Sasha and Maggie and Daryl could see them trying to console him. Realising that he looked far from casual and didn’t seem to have a reason for standing there to the uninformed observer, he pulled out his smokes and sparked up. He shoved the pack back into his pocket and looked up in time to see Eugene approaching him.

“Your observations about Miss Lexie having a close personal friend of the male variety have proved to be factually inept. She does, in fact appear to be involved in something that could potentially be described as a relationship. In future, I shall think twice about using you for the gathering of correct and sound information”

Daryl glanced over his shoulder to see Aaron giving him a surprised look before going back to his digging. Daryl sighed deeply and took a moment to look at Eugene's dejected and slightly irritated face. He had spent a long time on the road with him and while the two didn’t have what he would call any semblance of a friendship, he was still a part of the group, and therefore was a part of the family. He nudged his head up and motioned for Eugene to follow him further away from anyone else’s earshot.

“C’mon over here. I gotta tell ya somethin’.” He instructed, taking a long drag of his cigarette.

Eugene complied without questions and dutifully followed him like a lost dog trailing behind its master. Daryl stopped at the other side of Deanna’s house and turned to face him.  

“Alright… it’s me.”

“Excuse me? What is you?” Eugene questioned.  

“The guy Lexie’s seein’. It’s me, man.”

A heavy silence formed when the words left Daryl’s mouth and Eugene did nothing but glare at him for an uncomfortably long time. Until he blinked and the veil of jealousy seemed to lift from his eyes.

“I see” He snapped.

“Dude, it just happened. I didn’t plan it and we both wanna keep it quiet.” Daryl tried to explain before flicking his cigarette away having lost all interest in it.

“No, I very much doubt that you did plan such an outcome. I will keep your secret. As long as your intentions are good and Miss Lexie and yourself are on the same proverbial page then I do not declare this to be an issue.”

“Sorry, man” Daryl said sincerely

Eugene held up a hand to quieten him

“No need. Really. I’ll be over this in three flicks of an armadillo’s tail. If you’ll excuse me. Im’ma head home where there’s a jar of pickles with my name on it. But I do wish to convey something to you; Not only is that woman insanely hot, I have also come to the conclusion from my estimations and observations that she is a good and true person and you would do well to treat her accordingly. You have proved to be an honourable individual in the time I have known you and I have no qualms with you. But you are what is commonly known as a lucky son of a bitch. I bid you have a good day.”

He turned on his heels and walked off stiffly with his dark, greasy mullet shining in the sun. Daryl wasn’t sure if he was removing himself from the situation because he was mad or if it was just his odd nature at play. His chest welled with a strange feeling, a feeling that he hadn’t felt in a long time and that wasn’t unpleasant. Then, it occurred to him; it was pride. He noticed Lexie still sat on the wall, her legs crossed under her and her eyes fixed on him as her hair blew gently about her face. He wanted to be near her, so he set off in her direction.

 

“So, you’re socialising now, huh?” He asked as he stepped up onto the sidewalk and stopped, peering down at her.

“He offered me lemonade.” She shrugged. “And a date.”

“A date?” Daryl queried.

“Yeah. Had to let him down gently. There’s this guy I’m seeing, he’s a little rough around the edges, but I’m really into him.”

His hair fell in front of his face as he held back a grin at the thought of her blatant admission of her opinion of him. He didn’t think he would ever get tired of hearing how much she liked him, even though he found it all a little hard to believe.

“Know the feelin. There’s a girl I’m seein’, she’s got these pretty brown eyes.”

Lexie chuckled and pat the space on the wall next to her. He leaned back against the wall beside her.

“She’s got a good ass too.” He revealed against his better judgement but considered it worth a try. He didn’t turn to her, but he heard her laugh and could tell she was beaming as she nudged his shoulder gently with hers.

“Seein’ each other…that what we’re doin?” He wanted to know.

“I suppose so.” She mumbled as she picked at her religiously applied black nail polish in her lap.

“What’s that phrase even mean?” He continued. "Had to fess up to Eugene and I didn't know what the hell I was talkin' about."

“Damned if I know.” She muttered. “Have to admit, it was tempting to say yes to him.”

Daryl’s head snapped to the side and although he tried not to look shocked, he failed. Lexie smirked.

“When life gives him lemons… He makes great lemonade.” She joked.

“Damn, gotta switch up my game.” Daryl scoffed.

“I wouldn’t bother. He won’t be able to turn me on with the touch of a hand like you can.”

Straight away, he lowered his head, hiding behind his hair and exposing the pink tips of his ears. She had made him blush and she was enjoying every single second along with the fact that it was so easy to do. She guessed that he hadn’t ever been any good with being showered with compliments and comments that alluded to someone desiring him. It was easy to see in him, because she was the same. He nibbled his lip and looked at her sideways.

“Look, about last night-“  He stared

“-Yeah, about that.”

“We was both pretty lit. It don’t matter if ya said or did stuff ya regret.” He told her.

Lexie leaned back slightly, as if trying to get a better look at him. She raised an eyebrow.

“Regret? I was just going to say it was great and we should do it again sometime.” She mentioned breezily.

“Oh, right.” He replied awkwardly.  

“I meant every word I said and every move I made. I regret nothing” She smiled at him casually as she got up, grabbed her sketchbook and hopped down the stairs to the armoury. At the bottom she turned and looked up, seeing Daryl’s mouth quirked up into a shy smile as he observed her from the wall at the top and she felt a rush of satisfaction.

_Play it cool, Lexie. Play it cool._


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Very short chapter just to keep this moving <3

Lexie had read it before. It was one of her favourites during her college years and she had even gone as far as to rifle through many thrift stores and yard sales in search of the perfect hardback copy of it. ‘The Collector’ had become her book of choice in the new world, but nothing could compare to the day that she dragged out a blue book from beneath a pile of old vinyl records that someone had left outside their dorm room. Lexie hadn’t thought twice, giving little consideration to whoever owned it, she had swiped it up in the blink of an eye and ran back to her own room. She had been delighted with her find, the beautifully drawn images at the beginning of each chapter and the flawless front cover. She had found the perfect copy of To Kill a Mocking bird that she would go on to treasure, if only she had time to find it and bring it with her when she had left her apartment at the start of the turn.

Now she sat with Deanna’s small paperback copy in her hands, happily reading through the second chapter and munching on a cereal bar she had found in the bottom of one of her bags. How old it was, she had no idea. She didn’t care much for expiration dates anymore, it seemed trivial considering food was scarce and they had to accept what they could find. She had built her usual snug in the corner of the rooftop perch and lay back on a wall of cushions, a blanket draped over her legs and a lantern lit above her, hanging on a hook.

Daryl had turned up as she expected and she ignored the churning mass of excitement he always seems to create in her stomach every time she saw him. He settled next to her and she silently handed him what was left of the cereal bar, her eyes still trailing along the words on the page. He accepted and chewed noisily as he shuffled around on the spot and lay back, surprising her by using her outer thigh as a pillow. Her eyes darted up from the page to register him staring up at the sky, his hands clasped together over his stomach. He was getting more and more comfortable around her while still taking baby steps and she loved the fact that he’d felt comfortable enough to take up such a brazen position, resting his head on her leg.

“What’s it about?” He asked.

She slid her bookmark into place and offered him the book with the intention that he reads the paragraph on the back. He waved her off, shaking his head.

“Naw, you tell me.”

“It’s right there.” She protested.

“Like listenin to you” He said.

“OK. Well, it’s set in Alabama in the 1930’s and it follows the story of a little girl called Scout. Her father, Atticus is a lawyer who is hired to defend a black man that has been accused of rape. It’s kind of told from a child’s point of view and it’s just amazing. I’ve read it before, but it never gets old.”

She felt him move as she finished speaking and noticed him snuggling back further, using more of her leg to lay on. Her lips curled up at one side while she watched him get comfortable on her and she resisted the urge to reach out and lightly brush his hair from his face, deciding that she would evaluate the situation more before committing to such a next level romantic gesture like that. He didn’t ask anymore, seemingly satisfied with her summary.

“Why did you tell Eugene about you and I? You didn’t have to, I didn’t mention a name” She asked.

“Been makin eyes at the girl he likes. Owed him the truth. He ain’t gonna sing about it.”

“That was good of you. Does anybody else know?”

“Just Carol. Ain’t said nothin’ to nobody else.”

“Mel and Aaron and Eric know.”

“Yeah, I know. S’ok.”

Daryl had no desire to announce his feelings for Lexie from the rooftops. He knew he was the last person the group would expect to get into a romantic relationship, not just because of losing Faith, but because he had completely withdrawn himself from any signs of close friendships let alone relationships and frequently came across as hostile, rude and unapproachable.The closest he had been to anyone in the last few months was Carol, who always had his unwavering support and vice versa. He got along well with everyone else when he had to and saw Rick as a kind of adoptive brother, but usually stayed on the sidelines and distanced himself for the most part. The secrecy surrounding what was happening between him and Lexie wasn’t because he was ashamed or embarrassed to be seen with her, it was mainly due to his concerns about it being early days and even he wasn’t entirely sure what was going to happen from this point onwards. He knew he liked her, that she had a huge effect on him and that seeing her turn down a date with someone, even if it was Eugene, had filled him with pride that she had chosen him. People would be shocked, they would talk and gossip and he would feel like a bear being prodded in a zoo and he was sure that he couldn’t deal with that kind of attention.

“What did you do? Before the turn?” Lexie asked out of the blue

“Nothin.” He shrugged.

“Nothing? Then how did you live?” She pressed.

He sat up and scooted around to sit beside her. He mirrored her positioning and leaned back against the cushions, his shoulder touching hers.

“Did some haulin’ materials and shit at construction sites for a buddy of mine. Rest of the time I…” he stopped talking and let out a quiet sigh.

“You what?”

“…you don’t need to know. It don’t matter no more.” He dismissed.

“I’ve told you things about me. I want to know about you. I’m not going to judge you based on your past. None of us can ever really do that anymore.” She assured him.

He glanced to his side at her, seeing her pleading brown eyes and realised she was incredibly difficult to say no to. He didn’t want to lie to her, nor did he want to not answer, so he volunteered the truth.

“I ran drugs for a local motorcycle club.” He confessed.

Lexie didn’t reply, she just pouted and raised a shoulder briefly in a show of indifference. Daryl was relieved to see this low key reaction.

“The sentinels?” She questioned.

His head shot to the side in confusion.

“Yeah”

Lexie smiled and gave him a knowing look. She could see it written all over his face that he was worried about her familiarity with his old life.

“We’re from the same town. I’ve heard of them. I know a guy that left college to join them.” She told him.

It was a comment that was said in innocence as a explaination as to how she knew of the club. But she regretted mentioning it as soon as it was said, remembering just how she knew the guy she had referred to and hoping that he wasn’t going to ask any details

“Yeah? Who?” He queried.

“Um… Stevie Anderson?”

“Ahh, Yeah I knew him. Scrawny dude, those weird lip piercings.”

“Snakebites”

“Yeah. He was alright though. How’d ya know him?”

“Oh, Uh, We were friends in college.” She answered, far quicker than she had intended. 

“Sure about that?” He smirked, acknowledging her uneasy reaction.

“Yeah. Well, kind of.”

“What?”

“We were friends. But he had this crush on me. Didn’t make a secret of it. Pursued me for months and I just kept saying no. It wasn’t that I didn’t like him, I did, he was cool. I just didn’t like him _that_ much. He tried to kiss me countless times and I just pushed him away until one day when I gave in and slept with him and then he left to join the Sentinels and that was that.”

Daryl laughed under his breath and rubbed his chin with one hand. He thought her need to be so honest was endearing, along with how nervous she seemed about it. He really didn't care that she'd slept with Stevie, especially when he remembered the nowhere near classy and downright rough women he had been with. Faith having been the only woman he was ever proud to be seen with, even if it meant people snickering and asking how someone like him had ever managed to land a woman like her.

“Alright. Wasn’t expecting that.” He huffed.

“Yeah, neither was I.” She concluded.

“Ya slept with Stevie. Shit” he chuckled, hoping she would see it as him prodding fun at her

Lexie slapped his arm in jest and threw him a partially unimpressed glare. She really didn’t want to have to discuss her past indiscretions but had to admit that she was curious about Daryl’s and it worked both ways. She was going to have to admit to her less than appealing decisions from before if she even wanted to ask about his. Stevie had been the kind the guy that a girl could never take home to her parents, but he had been nothing but courteous and respectful to her, even after she rejected him time after time.

“Shut up. He may have looked like a junkie but he was kind of… sweet. He was sweet to me.”

“He _was_ a junkie. I used to do blow with him and Merle sometimes, but it was never enough for him. He’d hit the meth straight after. Don’t think I ever saw him sober. Hell, I’m sure he’d have pretended to be anything if it got him a night with you.” Daryl contemplated.

 _Now we’re getting somewhere._ She thought. _I didn’t even have to ask for this information._

Lexie was under no illusions that Stevie did drugs, but she had no idea what or how much. She had slept with him for a number of reasons; to shut him up, curiosity, to satisfy her own need for physical intimacy, and because she felt bad about saying no to him for that long when his loyalty to her never seemed to wane. She also didn’t know that Daryl did drugs either, but wasn’t about to screw everything up by mentioning it. It wasn’t something that bothered her too much, pretty much everyone she knew in college had done drugs at some point, even Mel and Lexie couldn’t say she was completely innocent either. She had managed to harbour a secret stash of weed under her mattress in their parents house for years and when she finally moved out, it was transferred to a shoebox at the back of her closet.

 “He was still sweet to me.” She affirmed. “It’s weird how I never knew you. From school or something. Or your brother… or Faith.”

“I'm like five years older than you. Plus, Merle and me didn’t really go to school much. He was locked up a lot or away with the Military. Faith was from the next town over. Moved when her husband died.” He said

“She was married? Her husband died? What?” Lexie exclaimed in surprise.

“He was in the Army. Killed in Afghanistan. I met her a few months after.”

“Wow.” She whispered.

“She moved on with me after a while. Think he was always with her somehow.”

Lexie leaned her head back on the cushions and looked at the stars as she drew the blanket up around her arms. Daryl moved over slightly and took hold of the blankets edge, pulling it up to cover her shoulder before moving back into the same space as before, still just as close to her.

“It’s like she showed you how to do it, without even knowing that you’d be put in the same situation.” She mused.

She could see him nod to himself and side glance at her.

“Never thought of it like that.” He admitted.

 *****

Aaron slung the final bag into the back of the truck and wiped sweat from his brow with the back of his wrist as he squinted in the sun his view of the street being obscured by the intense rays of first thing in the morning. He could just make out the image of someone strolling towards him and recognised it to be Daryl when he got close enough for his vision to register it. He was loading a handgun as he walked and slapped the clip into place before sliding the gun into the back of his waistband. He nudged his head up in a greeting to Aaron.

“Hey man” Aaron called out “You ready?”

“Yeah. Listen, im’ma drive, OK? There’s somethin’ I wanna run by ya on the way.” He told him.

“Sure” Aaron shrugged, throwing him the trucks keys. Daryl caught them effortlessly with one hand and plucked his cigarettes from his pocket with the other. He tapped the pack and pinched one between his lips, withdrawing it from the wrapping and swapping out for a lighter. He lit the smoke and took his first puff without even touching it while he walked to the driver’s side.

Both doors slammed loudly as Aaron and Daryl climbed into the cab. Aaron unfolded his map and began working out the route to their destination when he saw Daryl wave a hand at him before turning the trucks ignition key, bringing the vehicles engine to life.

“How do ya feel about a detour?” Daryl asked.

“Hmm, a last-minute change of plan? The wrong place marked on the map in the armoury? Imminent danger? Why the hell not?!” Aaron joked sarcastically

“Don’t get ya damn knickers in a knot, man. S’gonna be fine.” Daryl scoffed, his cigarette dangling from his lips as he spoke.

Aaron leaned out of the passenger seat window and signalled to Glenn to open the gate for them.

“I can still drive, y’know.” He mentioned, sucking back into the cab. He had always driven the truck seeing as Daryl usually had his bike and it felt odd to him not to be behind the wheel. He was going to have find something to amuse himself once they hit the long stretch of highway which would mean a pause in navigation.

“We need to go faster than a Sunday afternoon.” Daryl mumbled as he manoeuvred the truck out of the gate and wound the window down. The vehicle spluttered and grinded as Daryl changed the gears up.

Aaron flapped the map down onto his lap and shot him a shocked look.

“I do not drive that slow.” He complained.

“Dude, my grandma can drive faster than you…n’ she’s dead.” Daryl shot back before taking his smoke from his lips and holding between his fingers on the wheel. He expelled a large cloud of smoke that was soon snatched by the breeze through the window.  

Aaron sat back in his seat and regarded Daryl with suspicion while the truck continued to choke as it moved.

“At least I can drive stick.” Aaron quipped, earning him an angry look from his companion that was hinted with jest.

“Ya really want me to make a comment about how you can drive stick right now?” He asked.

Aaron chuckled loudly at Daryl’s out of character reference to his sexuality and how cleverly it had been used to taunt him. He knew little of his background, only what he had been told while enduring many a cold night out recruiting and Daryl explained that he had an older brother that was a racist, homophobe with a drug problem and an even bigger attitude problem. With this in mind, Aaron was content in the knowledge that the two of them got along like a house on fire considering the environment he had come from. Never once had Daryl made Aaron feel like he was any different to him. In fact, after saving his life, he had turned out to be someone that he trusted, admired and respected and he suspected that the feeling may well be mutual.

“Touché.” Aaron laughed. “Fine, just stop switching it up so quick, you’re going to burn us out before the end of the street.”

“Sure, grandma.”

 *****

Mel picked up the bucket of water and held it aloft, as high as the muscles in her arms would allow before they started to shake. Underestimating the weight of the bucket, she second guessed her decision but still opted to go with it, the embarrassment of having to put it down again too much to accept during such a heated argument.

Lexie backed up and held her hands out in front of her, palms facing her sister in submission. They were on the front porch and Mel’s shrill shouting had caused numerous people passing by to stop and stare, her natural ability to dramatize absolute everything at play as usual.

“Oh no, you’re not. Put the fucking bucket down, you psycho!” Lexie cried.

“You want me to do my bit! Fine! I’ll clean the porch, just like you asked! I’ll clean you too, you self-righteous asshole” Mel screamed.

Lexie was gawping at her like she had morphed into some kind of perfectly preened demon in the last few minutes. She had asked Mel to help her clean the porch and the windows and innocently pointed out that she was the only one to ever do any cleaning. Something in Mel must have snapped, because she was now glaring at her sister with a rage that would fuel the fire of a thousand suns, with the container of water gripped in her shaking hands.

“You don’t even know what self-righteous means, Mel.” Lexie sighed.

“I know what ‘fuck you’ means!” She shrieked as she hauled the bucket as fast as she could at Lexie.

Water sloshed out but gained more height than it did distance, creating nothing but a split-second fountain, followed by a splash on the floor which Lexie simply stepped back away from. It had been two days since Aaron and Daryl had left for a recruiting run and Lexie was glad about one thing, that neither of them was here to witness this debacle.

 *****

Aaron drove as fast as he could, hit foot flooring the accelerator and proving that as much as Daryl liked to tease him about his slow driving, he was capable of burning rubber like a Nascar driver if it was a life or death situation. He kept peering over at Daryl in the passenger seat, who’s blood was dripping down his arm and off the top of his fingers which were aimed down into the footwell. His skin was pallid and pale, his forehead and arms slick with sweat. He was slumped against the inside of the passenger door. His leather vest had a large, bloody hole in it that was pumping crimson liquid every time Daryl’s other had slipped away from it in his weak, blurry haze. They had managed to tie a tourniquet around his shoulder blade which had helped to stem the bleeding and Daryl had initially tried to brush the whole thing under the rug as if it were nothing. Even going as far as telling Aaron that he was going to superglue it shut and that he’d dealt with worse. Aaron was horrified at the idea and had been speeding back to the gates with little regard for the noise created by the truck’s engine and desperately trying to keep Daryl awake ever since.

“Daryl, stay with me, man. Don’t fall asleep.” Aaron called out.

“M’awake. Shut up” He groaned.

 _Yeah, just._ Aaron thought.

He sighed with relief when he saw the Gate to Alexandria appear at the far end of the street

“We’re here, but you have to keep pressure on that wound. C’mon.” Aaron continued.

“You n’ me are gonna mix if you don’t quit harpin’ on at me.” Daryl threatened.

Aaron managed a small laugh at the thought of a half dead Daryl who hadn't lost his sense of humour, taking a useless swing at him. As the gate grew closer and the wind tore through the cab, the adrenaline pumping through his veins started to subside and was being replaced by a strange rush of emotional relief.

 *****

Lexie inched closer and closer to Mel, with her hands out ready to grab the bucket. But it was like a red rag to a bull as Mel jolted forwards and tried to soak her once again. Lexie rolled her eyes and stepped back again, flopping her hands at her side with annoyance. Mel was breathing rapidly, her stance telling Lexie that she was more than ready for a fight.

“You’re over reacting.” Lexie complained “again”

“Feels like the right kind of reaction to me right now. I’ll soak your holier than thou ass!” Mel yelled.

The two women were so engrossed in the public argument that neither of them noticed a bloodstained Aaron standing in their front yard with half of his face smeared with Daryl’s blood like something out of a Stephen King novel. He cleared his throat numerous times but went unnoticed.

“HEY!” He finally shouted, visibly startling both of them. Mel dropped the bucket, causing water to jump up and soak her leg. She cursed under her breath and Lexie’s hand shot up to her mouth in shock.

“Oh my god, Aaron.” She gasped as she sprinted down the steps to him, but he held a hand out to stop her before she got to him.

“Daryl was injured.” He said calmly.  

Lexie’s heart jumped into her throat and her mouth dried out in seconds. Her mind skimmed through every terrible thing that could have happened to him and she prayed to whoever was listening that he hadn’t been bitten.

“W-What?” she managed.

“He was stabbed. He’s with Denise now. Asked me to come and tell you. Don’t panic, he’s alive and he’s talking, I’m sure he’ll be fine” He assured her, raising a hand to place it on her shoulder and thinking twice when he saw that every inch of his hand was covered in blood.

Lexie’s eyes moved quickly, scanning Aarons clothing, every spec of blood and she concluded that Daryl must have lost a lot of it because Aaron seemed to be wearing it all. She darted past Aaron like a bat out of hell while Mel looked on in horror. Her boots smacked noisily on the sidewalk and her hair flailed out behind her as she ran as fast as he legs could carry her.

*****

Daryl was with Denise, Alexandria’s Doctor who had hooked him up to a drip, cleaned the wound and was in the middle of stitching up his left shoulder when Lexie barged in. She was out of breath but her face was deathly pale, as if she had already decided she was going to walk into something terrible. Her hair was wild, stuck to her neck and forehead with perspiration and she danced back and forth on the spot for a moment while she took in the scene.

Daryl flinched and shifted around, shielding his back from her. Denise seemed to understand why and side stepped with him so she could continue her work.

Lexie was terrified, despite being clearly able to see that he was awake and out of danger, she wanted to keep her feelings about Daryl under wraps and so was forced to act as casual as she possibly could in her sweaty and panicked state.

“Hi.” She panted.

“Hey.” Daryl replied

“You’re hurt.” She stated.

“S’nothin.”

Without Lexie even saying anything, Denise could read from her face and Daryl’s need to hide certain things from her that there was something going on between them.

“Who stabbed you? Why? What happened?” She demanded.

“Ran into a bunch of assholes on the highway. Tried to rob us. So, I shot em. Just not before one of em got a jab in. Like I said, s’nothin.”

 _The fucking irony._ She thought.  _He spends weeks teaching me knife skills then goes and gets stabbed._

“Yep. A whole lot of nothing that requires stitches” Denise corrected. “He’s lost a fair amount of blood but he’ll be fine. Just needs to take it easy for a while. I’m amazed you didn’t pass out on the way though.”

“Thank Aaron for that. Yabberin’ on like he could start a damn argument in an empty house.” Daryl complained, hearing Denise giggle from behind him. The tugging and sharp pain sparking through his shoulder blade. Lexie was hopeful at the sound of him cracking a joke about Aaron, he couldn't be that bad if he was still making a notable effort to tease her best friend.

“He’s tough.” Lexie added unintentionally. Both Denise and Daryl stared at her as if she’d grown an extra head. Her skin prickled with embarrassment. Daryl thought it was the cutest thing he'd ever seen her say but he wasn't about to tell her that any time soon. 

“Sure is” Denise agreed.

“OK. I’ll just… I’ll go find Aaron. Yeah… bye.” Lexie rambled with a shaky voice as she backed up and ducked out of the door before anyone could say anything else.

Denise let out an amused huff from behind Daryl, who could see her reflection in a picture frame on the wall. She had a breezy grin on her face as she worked.

“Somethin you find funny, Doc?” He asked.

“No, no. Nothing at all.” She answered while she carried on gently threading the needle through his flesh. “It’s just, I didn’t know you two were a thing, that’s all.”

“We ain’t.” He snapped.

“Oh…OK.”

Daryl could see her still smiling in the picture frame as she worked. He didn’t actually know if they were or not, but figured it best to shoot down any kind of suspicion before things were a little more certain. But he could tell that not a lot got past Denise and was all of a sudden grateful for doctor-patient confidentiality. Apocalypse or not, Denise knew how to keep her mouth shut. Besides, she owed him for all the time’s he’d risked his life finding Orange Soda for her to give to her girlfriend, Tara. Purely because she spoke about it in her sleep.

“She’s like a butterfly, that woman.” She mused.

“What?”

“Quiet, but pretty. Interesting but not very trusting. Flits around and Everybody sees her, but she only graces some of us with interaction.”

“Sounds like you wanna date her” He grumbled.

“Believe me, if I didn’t have Tara, I’d try.” She admitted.

“She ain’t into girls anyways.” Daryl told her.

“Oh, so you know that much, huh?” She prodded, carefully finishing up his stitches and snipping off the excess thread. She gently lifted his dark red stained shirt over his shoulder for him. It dawned on him that Lexie may well like girls as much as she liked him, her sexuality was an assumption he had automatically made about her without considering that Mel had once told him that Lexie had been no stranger to the attention of women as well as men. Not that it mattered to him, he only cared that her interest was in him. 

“Whats with the interrogation? Knew I shouldn’t have listened to Aaron and just glued the damn thing shut.” He complained.

“Recipe for blood poisoning right there. Anyway, there’s nothing to be ashamed of. She seems to care about you.” She offered, moving around the bed to face him. Her rotund and kind face peering down at him through her glasses. Denise was a likeable and selfless person, having proved herself to be extremely useful for all manner of medical issues even though she was a psychiatrist. She had put her brief training as a surgeon to good use.

“She does.” Daryl muttered.

“You care about her?” She pressed.

“C’mon doc, I didn’t come here to get my head shrunk.” He said, jumping down from the bed and shrugging his shirt on. He picked up his vest and ran his hand over the hole in it, shaking his head at the damage. He made a mental note to ensure Carol saw it and would inevitably sew it up for him like she seemed to do with everything else.  

“Alright, fine. I’ll leave it alone. Just know that I’m totally rooting for you two.” She grinned.

“Stop it.”

She made him sit back down until he’d got more fluids in him to replace all the blood he’d lost and ran through some basics of how to ensure he didn’t get an infection, some do’s and don’ts and offered him some painkillers which he flat refused to accept, telling her there would be others that needed them more. When he left the building, he kept an eye out for Lexie, seeing only a soaking wet front porch at the front of her house and otherwise empty streets.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everything's gone quiet! But I am still continuing to post because I'm still loving writing this. Especially this chapter ;) Thank you to those leaving Kudos!

Lexie leaned back on the front door after slamming it shut when she had returned from Denise’s office. She lined her back up with the door, tilting her head back until that too was pressed against the wooden surface. Eric, who was crossing the hall from the kitchen, saw her and slowly approached her having noticed that she seemed a little highly strung and reeling.

"How is he?" He asked

Her eyes dropped from the ceiling to Eric’s concerned face and she let out a huge breath after realising that she had been holding it in since she’d got home.

“He was stabbed. But he’s OK. He was…was stabbed.” She repeated.

“I know, Lex. And you?” Eric urged, stepping closer and lightly rubbing her upper arm through her jacket.

“What about me?” She asked, mystified at being asked about herself when all she could think about was Daryl being hurt.

“C’mon Lexie, I know how it feels. Aaron’s always out there looking for people. He comes back hurt sometimes. He had so much blood on him I almost had a heart attack when Mel came to get me and I saw him sat on your couch. You know there are occasions when he’s gone for days. I try not to worry, but I can’t help it.” He reasoned.

She met his eye and fought back tears, failing for a moment and having to look back up at the ceiling and swallow hard. He moved to stand in front of her so no one else could see her if they exited the living room, he rubbed her arm with a little more pressure which she seemed to take some comfort from.  

“I’m not used to caring about someone like this. I mean, besides you and Aaron and my idiot sister.” She admitted.

“I wish I could say it gets easier, but you just learn how to live with it.” He sighed. “I’m always here, OK? Take a minute. Aaron and Mel are in the other room.”

Rubbing her eyes with the sleeves of her jacket, she inhaled deeply, gathered herself together and nodded once at Eric. He took it at his cue to step to the side and walk with her to face Mel and Aaron.

Aaron was sat with a mug clasped in his hands opposite Mel, who was silent in the armchair across the coffee table. The blood had dried into a cracked, veined surface on the side of his face and the backs of his hands and to Lexie it resembled mud that had dried in the sun. Only it wasn’t mud, it was Daryl’s blood.

“What happened?” She asked Aaron.

His face was downcast yet sympathetic and she noticed how exhausted he looked. His eyes were heavy and his face sunken, the colour drained from his cheeks.  

“They came out of nowhere, from the trees. Blocked the road. They wanted our guns and supplies. Daryl handed over the rifles but managed to keep his Glock hidden long enough for him to shoot them all when they moved past us to the truck. He killed all five of them. It happened so fast, I couldn’t even tell you the synchronisation of it all. One of them managed to get a knife into his back but it didn’t stop him. I’m telling you, Daryl…he’s-he’s totally fearless.” He described.

Lexie moved into the room and gestured with her hand that she wanted Aaron to get up. He got the message and put his mug on the table, rising to his feet to find her bringing him into a tight embrace.

“So are you, Aaron. You go out there with him all the time. I’m glad you’re OK. Thank you for bringing him back.” She said against his chest.

“Of course. I know you care about him. So do I, he’s a good friend. I owe him a lot”

Lexie backed up and squeezed Aaron’s hand before she turned and climbed the stairs silently while the others watched on, all knowing without having to say anything that she needed to be alone and that she was struggling to come to terms with the fact that the man she cared about was always putting himself in harms way and that wasn't ever going to change. 

*****

When darkness arrived, Lexie had braved knocking on the door of Daryl’s house after making sure only he and Carol were in. She noted that Rick, Michonne and Carl had left the house together so she raced down the stairs as fast as she could and sprinted across the grass, arriving at the house a little out of breath and looking dishevelled. Carol answered and immediately smiled and invited her in, paying little mind to her out of breath and flushed appearance.

“Daryl is in the living room.” She whispered as she closed the door behind them. “I’ll give you guys some privacy.”

Without hesitation, Daryl shot to his feet when he realised that Lexie was there. He had been laying on his side, trying to ignore the throbbing pain in his shoulder blade when he heard Carol whispering and looked over to see Lexie chewing the sleeve of her jacket. Lexie took in his change of attire, deciding she quite liked the Black sweatpants and white vest look but it did nothing to distract her from the fact that she felt like she was all over the place. Unable to concentrate and filled with anxiety. She fiddled with the end of her sleeve and shifted her weight from side to side intermittently. In one hand, she held a small, round pillow with a hole in it.

“Hi” She said quickly.

“Hi.” He echoed, the corner of his mouth lifting subtly.

“Are you OK?” She asked

“A little sore. But yeah, I’m good.”

“Good. That’s good.” A long pause fell between them as Daryl tried to read from her eyes what was going on in her head but heralded no results as she appeared too nervous for him to be able to decipher anything. She suddenly shot her hand out, offering him the pillow.

“I brought you this. It’s a travel pillow. Thought it might help you sleep. Can position the wound over the hole. It’s… it’s stupid.” She scoffed.

He gratefully took it from her grasp and tucked it under one arm.

“It ain’t stupid. Thanks” He said sincerely

Lexie had no idea what she was doing. Her brain was telling her one thing and her heart something completely different. She wanted to run, take herself away, put a mass of distance between them before Daryl could leave forever, if he wanted to or not.

“I-I just….” She stuttered before the words dropped away and all that was left was nothing.

Daryl waited, knowing better than anyone that she needed a minute. She suddenly stepped forwards and wrapped her arms around his middle, resting her head on his broad chest. He blinked in disbelief and raised his arms, unsure at first what to do with them before the realisation hits him. She was extremely worried about him and was showing him, in the only way she knew how, that she didn’t want to lose him. He smiled to himself and indulged a little in the sensation of her tight embrace. He closed his arms around her shoulders and rested his chin on her head. She inhaled sharply and whimpered quietly, hoping he hadn’t picked up on it. But he had.

“Hey… I’m fine.” He soothed. “Everything’s fine.”

She said nothing, holding him tighter and pushing her face into his chest. He was astounded by her reaction. The grip of her arms around his waist was laden with a ferocious need to be with him, to be close to him, to feel for herself that he was still there. Then, she let go. Without a word, she left the room, then the house, closing the door behind her and leaving Daryl completely blindsided.

 *****

Five days had passed and Daryl’s shoulder injury was healing well. Denise had checked on it religiously for fear of him getting an infection and she had given him some pointers about what he could and could not do while it was still healing. With him mainly out of action for the most part, unable to ride his motorcycle or hunt, he was bored out of his mind.

Lexie had tried to distance herself from him, her feelings for him growing ever stronger since his injury. She had retreated into herself, refused to talk to anyone about it and had only admitted under the promise of secrecy to Mel that she was scared of how much she cared for him and how easily he could be taken from her.

But Daryl persevered. He wanted to be near her and had turned up on the perch every night after climbing the ladder with one arm and sitting in the quiet, smoking and willing her to come out and be with him. She watched from the window for the first two nights and on the third admitted defeat. She hadn’t uttered a word as she read her book beside him and he hadn’t tried to talk to her or touch her. He knew she needed time and in true Lexie style, she would talk to him when she was ready. But, he couldn’t help but look at her and he didn’t even bother to try and disguise it, watching her delicately tuck her hair behind her ear or lick her lips as her eyes skimmed over the words on the pages. He wanted to reach up and run his fingers through the brown strands of her hair, wrap her in his arms and pull her onto his lap so he could sit there with her, protecting her, assuring her. But he didn’t dare for fear of her running off like a doe jolts off into the woods at the first sign of trouble.

On the fifth day, Lexie climbed out of the window with two blankets in her hand. The sun had vanished below the horizon and the air was cooling. Daryl had been able to wear his vest again and it caught her eye as she approached him. She unfolded one of the blankets and draped it lightly across his shoulders. He flinched slightly as his mind adjusted to what was happening and soon grabbed the edges, tugging it around his arms. She sat down, legs dangling from the roof, mirroring him and wrapped her own blanket around herself. He could sense her looking at him, examining the side of his face.

“Does it hurt?”

“Sometimes.”  

She looked at him with her large, brown eyes filled with affection and wonder at how he seemed to come out of nowhere. How he had turned up at her father’s gun store one day and then, she ran into him in the apocalypse and ended up caring about him with a ferocity that she didn’t know she had in her.

“I don’t want you to die.” She blurted out.

“Unless ya tell me to, I ain’t plannin’ on goin nowhere.”

She nodded, a gesture that told him she had accepted his statement, though her eyes were still filled with worry. She tried to change the subject, aware that she had already likely been perceived as slightly unhinged.

“Sometimes I wish that vacations were still a thing. Like I could just pack a bag and go somewhere and get away from everything. But now, everything just follows, or it’s wherever we go. I could use a vacation.” She rambled.

Daryl looked to his side at her, tilting his head back. She was biting down on her bottom lip, her eyes lowered to her fingers, which she was wrapping the elastic end of her sweater around over and over again.

“Im’ma take ya on vacation.” He announced.

“What?” She croaked

“We’ll go tomorrow if ya alright with drivin’.” He told her.

She gawped at him in a stunned silence. This had come out of the blue. What on earth was he talking about?

“What? Ya don’t wanna go with me?”

“I have armoury shifts.” She stated. The response sounding vastly more ridiculous out loud than it did in her head. 

_What are you doing?! Say yes!_

“I’ll handle that” he stated.

There it was again, that hint of control and bossiness that she so loved from when he had ordered her to go on a run with him to the Mall. She liked that he was becoming so at ease around her that he was now just telling her what he wanted.

“You were just stabbed!” She exclaimed.

“Ahh hell, I'm fine. I could use a vacation too.” He dismissed.

Lexie stared at him for what felt like hours to Daryl. He could see her pretty eyes hovering over his face like she was trying to read her innermost thoughts.

“OK. Take me on vacation.” She said, a grin emerging on her face.  

She shuffled closer to him and he placed his hand on her leg, his palm facing upwards expectantly. She slowly slid her hand into his and he closed his fingers around her. There it was again, that strangely addictive feeling of holding someone’s hand that was fast becoming an addiction. They sat there for the next couple of hours and Daryl removed his hand from hers, stepping things up further when he laid his arm around her shoulders. Lexie leaned into him and was sure that she could remember a time when she had ever felt so unexpectedly happy.

 *****

Wine night with Aaron the next night was bittersweet. Aaron had played down his role in the roadside attempted robbery and Lexie could see from the bumps and scrapes on his arms that it was likely that he’d been tackled to the ground at some point. She looked over his wounds sadly, lightly touching a cut on his forearm with her index finger.

“I’m fine, really.” He assured her, filling her glass for the second time.

They were on the front perch in the blanketed warmth of the early Georgian afternoon. The sun still managing to carpet the town with its last beams of light which cast a golden and orange glow around the rooftops and buildings. Aaron reclined beside her, both of them resting back against the outer wall of the house.

He had asked her why she had been so withdrawn since he and Daryl had returned, adding that he and Eric had missed her. After an internal debate about her reply, she admitted that Daryl had also told her he missed her and that she felt like everything was getting too overwhelming. That she couldn’t get used to caring so deeply about a man that could get snatched away from her in the blink of an eye and it had clouded her mind and made her restless.

“Sometimes… I just need to hide. Think.” She whispered. “I have…abandonment issues.”

Aaron decided against pressing her for a more detailed and elaborate explanation, accepting that this was Lexie and she would tell him more if she deemed it necessary. She was an overly private person but had trusted Aaron with one or two delicate subjects and he found that as long as he reminded her that he was there and didn’t push too much, she would tell him how she felt.

“A vacation would be nice.” She said, very deliberately side glancing at him. He sipped his wine and raised his eyebrows as he played dumb. “Daryl wants to take me out of Alexandria for a few days.”  

“Oh, does he?” He questioned, his lie thinly veiled. Lexie gave him an unimpressed look.

“You know about this, don’t you?” She probed.

He pressed his lips together and furrowed his brow. One of the reasons Lexie liked Aaron so much was his honesty and how easy he was to read. He also had a terrible inability to tell a lie and even if he did, he crumbled under the slightest pressure.

“No?” he tried.

“You’re a terrible liar” She groaned.

“Ahh I know! You’re going to love it.” He beamed. Lexie shuffled around, positioning her body to face him and crossing her legs. She held her wine glass poised between her fingers on her left hand, balancing it on her knee. The refreshing breeze licked at her bare arms, and she didn’t think there could be a better spot to finish off a bottle of red wine with Aaron.

“I am?” She enquired

“Oh yeah. I gotta hand it to him, it’s cute.” He said, laughing slightly at the end of the sentence.

“What?” She scoffed shyly. “’Cute’ is not a word I would associate with Daryl”

“C’mon! Whisking you away from everything like that. He obviously wants to be alone with you.” He encouraged.

“He said he wants to get away too. It’s just convenient.” She dismissed as she shrugged her shoulders and downed the rest of her drink. The chalky liquid left a sour taste, but once two or three glasses had been finished, it was barely noticeable.

“That’s crap. But OK.” He nodded, taking another gulp and setting his head back against the wall. “Has he kissed you yet?”

She saw him slowly turn his head back to her.

“No. Almost, but no.” She mumbled as she wound her index finger around a curled strand of hair that had escaped from her ponytail.

“Might be the perfect opportunity.” Aaron suggested.  

She sighed and glanced out over the street, Carol and Daryl were slowly wandering along the sidewalk talking quietly. Daryl carried a branch on his hands that he stripped of it’s leaves one by one. His head was low, concentrating both on his task and what Carol was saying to him.

“Maybe...” Lexie mused “…I should stop thinking that it has to be him that makes the move.”

 *****

Daryl had loaded the truck before Lexie had even arrived at the gate and as she approached him, her sunglasses down over her eyes and her bag slung over her shoulder, he had finished his smoke and opened the drivers side door for her. She nodded a shy thanks at his chivalry with a bashful smile that was mirrored by him involuntarily. Not a word was exchanged, nor did it need to be due to their ability to be in a comfortable silence for long periods of time together. Daryl held out a map over the dash so Lexie could clearly see the marked route.

“Mmhm” She hummed as she started up the truck, taking a quick glance into the backseat and seeing the guns that he checked out. Two rifles, two handguns and his crossbow.

The journey was eventless with them having only sped past a few, lone Walkers and with chatter between them kept to a minimum. Daryl used being a passenger to his advantage and took up every chance he got to admire her as she drove. Not caring one iota if she saw him, he noticed her tight, black cargo pants and loose fitting, dark green button down. How tempting it was to lower his vision as the wind blew through her shirt, flashes of her chest, teasing from the open three buttons. But he didn’t indulge for too long, feeling like he was taking too much from her even before having kissed her.

When the vehicle rolled up to the house and Lexie hit the breaks, a jolt of amazement shot through her when her eyes moved up from the path and took in the grand building in front of her. She peered through the dusty windscreen as Daryl climbed out of the passenger side and tapped the cars hood.

“Roll her into the barn. Should keep it out of sight. I’ll get the door.” He informed her through the open window.

While Daryl opened the barn doors, she carefully observed him, ready to yell at him if he exerted his shoulder too much. But he seemed to manage fine with just the strength in one arm and as he walked off to the side, she noticed the fences around the house. They were wooden and originally around four feet high, only now a layer of thick fencing had been hammered to the posts, increasing the height to around 7 feet. They were also boasting a large number of sharpened, wooden stakes pointing outwards.

The house was huge, with her bag held on her shoulder and one hand clasped around the strap, she stood at the bottom of the porch steps and gazed up at the building. She could see the windows of at least four bedrooms. It looked like an old, gothic house with a sweeping front porch and windows shaped like the stained glass of a church. She thought it was the most beautiful and well-preserved house she had seen in a long time.

Daryl walked past her and took the steps, looking back and nudging his head up.

“C’mon. Unless ya wanna stay in the barn.” He joked.

The door and windows were boarded up except for the top floor but it had no detrimental effect on the exterior of the house, it was still a unique structure that Lexie had already fallen in love with. She always promised herself that if were ever lucky enough to be able to afford her own house, it would be a renovation project on something different and unforgettable.

Daryl unlocked the door, the fact that he had a key telling her that he had brought her to the house where he had found all the art supplies. She had connected the dots during her conversation with Aaron but was careful to keep it to herself. Still, excitement welled in her chest and she grinned as she wandered inside and began exploring the bottom floor of the house.

Daryl dumped a bag of food from the truck on the kitchen counter and found her staring in wonder at a massive bookshelf that spanned the entire wall of a room at the back of the house. He quietly paced about behind her, watching her pull out books and flip through the pages. She even lifted them to her nose so she can smell the musty, inky odour of a million different stories. Books were everywhere in the apocalypse but to find such a vast collection of looked after titles all in alphabetical order was bliss to Lexie.

He approached her and delicately took hold of her fingers.

“Come with me, there’s more.” He urged.

He led her out into the hall and up the stairs, she nibbled her nails on the hand he wasn’t holding and happily trailed along behind him. He brought her to a closed door and pushed it open, letting go of her hand. Light crashed in through the window, illuminating a huge room filled with canvases, easels, masses of varieties of paints and pencils, books on art, brushes, even clay, plasticine and various sculpting tools.

“Oh my god” She breathed as she stepped into the room and began to turn slowly in a circle, taking it all in.

“Thought you’d like it.” Daryl grunted from the doorway.

“Like it? This is heaven to me. I want to stay here forever!” She admitted as she began to eagerly pick items up from tables and shelves and examine them as if they were made of solid gold and were the most precious things on earth.

“Got ya shifts covered for a week. Ya wanna come back after that, just say the word.” He told her.

She stopped moving and turned to face him.

“There’s so much more to you than the antisocial introvert you show people.” She expressed.

“Maybe I can say the same about you.” He shrugged.

“I am an antisocial introvert. Just not with you.” She replied with a flirtatious smile.

“Then we understand each other” he concluded.

_We certainly do._

She didn’t smile at him, or say anything. She simply turned and began to walk around again. She was different somehow, gliding around the room, her fingertips grazing over the easels and boxes of watercolour paints. She gently pulled at a sheet hanging on something to reveal a detailed painting of rolling hills set in the backdrop of an evening sky of purple and pink streaks. His eyes never left her, he didn’t want to miss a single thing she did. The faint, dreamy smile that was emerging on her face telling him that she was more than content here, she could be happy for hours to days just staying in this room with all these things. Things that reminded her of home, of before. Of herself. Her gaze moved up to the ceiling, where an array of home-made windchimes hung dormant and completely immobile above them. She continued to move slowly around, her head tilted up and her eyes wide. When she eventually looked back at Daryl, she noticed the small quirk of the corner of his mouth, his head being low but his eyes locked on her, a look in his eye that told her he could stand there watching her all night. She took a couple of steps closer to him, her hands winding around in the belt loops of her pants at her sides. He didn’t move an inch, his stare intense and tempting her even closer. She dared, a little bit at a time, until she was so close to him that he could see the different shades of brown in her eyes. His arms that were crossed over his chest slowly slid to his sides and she carefully reached out, tenderly touching the edges of his fingers and lowering her head.

She peered down at her hands, gently feathering his, a light touch here and there that provoked small twitches of his index and middle fingers until he wound them around hers and they were finally connected. A small yet powerful gesture. She stepped closer still, noticing him dip his head and then time had passed but she had no idea how much and he was nuzzling her temple and the side of her face, setting her heart racing. His breath flittered across the skin of her cheek and jaw and she turned her face closer towards him. His lips parted and he released a slow and laboured breath. His fingers were now laced with hers, still at their sides and tightly fastened together. She could feel a slight tremble in him, an apprehension that she wanted to take away.

 _Kiss her._ He thought. _You want this. You think about her all the damn time. Stop being such a pussy._

She raised her head higher, her nose brushing his. Her chest was almost pressed to him, she thought she could sense his heartbeat playing a chorus with her own. He let go of one of her hands, smoothing his palm around the side of her neck and softly running a thumb along her jaw as he hesitated. She took the plunge, deciding she was going to be the one to make the move and brought her lips to his. He was sinking, melting into her and kissing her lightly at first until he reacted with more enthusiasm. She sucked in a breath through her nose and wanted to savour these precious few seconds. Her first kiss with him. He slowly applied more pressure to their kiss, fighting the urge to grab her and push her against the door frame. She let go of his other hand and took the chance to spread her fingers out at the top of his chest, where his shirt was slightly unbuttoned. His skin was warm, taut and she wanted more, needed to feel more of him but he gently pulled away, his hand threaded into the side of her hair. She opened her heavy, dazed eyes and saw the bright blue of his looking right back at her. A hushed and bashful laugh escaped her as she leaned forwards, resting her forehead on his shoulder. She felt him turn his head and bury his face in the side of her hair and she knew he was smiling.

It was everything she had hoped it would be. Her first meaningful kiss. Not an action carried out devoid of emotion but one that meant everything. Mel was rarely right about anything but with this, she had been spot on. It had made her knees weak and her heart race and as she stood there, clinging onto him, she realised he was doing the same to her. She hadn’t noticed his hands move, but they were around her waist, his fingers spread out.

“That was a good kiss” She whispered into his shoulder.

He moved a hand to her chin, leaning back slightly and lifting her head.

“Think we should do it again…y’know, make sure.”

“Yeah, we should.”

As she breathlessly agreed he used his hands on her hips to back her into the room against the large wooden table in the middle and hooked his good arm around her to hoist her up onto its surface by her waist. She separated her legs and pulled him closer to her by the front loops of his jeans and he was on her again, kissing her urgently this time. Teeth clashed and tongues caressed and smiles and giggles were exchanged as they both tried to gain more and more of each other. Hands grappling and feeling over clothes. She wrapped her legs around his middle, linking one leg over the other and feeling his hand close over the top of her thigh as his kiss intensified and she caught a low, gravelly growl from his throat that sent a barrage of pleasure coursing through her. She could hear the want in him and it was all hers. She draped an arm over his shoulder, immediately jolting back when he flinched and grunted into their kiss. She sat back and raised an eyebrow at him.

“Ow” he muttered.

“Oh my god! Your wound! I’m so sorry!” She panicked.

“Shh. S’ok. S’fine.” He soothed, running the back of an index finger among her cheek. His palm was still flat on her thigh and he smoothed it up and around to her back, leaning in to kiss the side of her neck and face. Small, light kisses that made her stomach flip and her eyes close. She moaned, unable to ignore the sparks that danced across her skin where his lips were and Daryl smiled to himself, she sounded happy and that had been his aim.

“This OK?” He rasped between kisses.

She reached up to him, pulling him back slowly and brushing his hair from his eyes. She gave him a small but sincere nod. His forehead was beaded with perspiration and when she dropped her hand and pressed it to the middle of his chest, his heart was thudding harder than she had expected, much like her own. She began to giggle and cursed herself for it.

“You nervous?” He asked, leaning back down to her and rubbing his nose on hers.

“Mmhmm” She hummed, still trying to hold back the strange and inappropriate chuckles awaiting release in her chest.

He kissed her again, lightly on her bottom lip, then her top which silenced her completely and forced her eyes shut. Masses of ideas, words and scenarios rushed though her head, all fighting to be heard. She was nervous, but only of one thing; screwing everything up. But so far, they both seemed be enthralled by the moment.

 _I am having a great vacation already._ She thought.

“So pretty” He whispered while he traced his fingertips along her neck and continued to nuzzle her face, unknowingly fixing everything that was wrong inside her mind for a few, precious seconds.

_I just died. I’m dead. I died. I’m gone. He is really good at this._

She hadn’t anticipated the immense urge to turn things into something more. To reach down and unbuckle his belt, to unbutton his shirt and invite him to do the same to her. Her core radiated with lust and it took all of her self control and discipline to scoot back on the table, dropping her legs from his waist and increasing the distance between them.

“I have to stop before this goes further.” She confessed.

She could see it in his face that he agreed and he reluctantly slid his hand from her back and used it to rub over his face as if to clear his vision and give his mind some clarity.

“Yeah, me too.” He sighed “Im’ma go check the perimeter fence and get the power working. There’s a generator in the garage. Should pick a bedroom.”

Lexie merely smiled. Incapable of doing much else as she sat and swung her legs like an excited teenager on the table. He reached out and brushed a stray wave of her hair from her face. A last, tender and romantic gesture as he backed away and swaggered out of the room, his angel wings disappearing down the stairs.

Lexie brought her hands to her cheeks and pressed her fingers to her massive grin.

“Oh my god oh my god oh my god” She whispered to herself with glee.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the comments and Kudos guys! Much love!  
> I need to put a ***TRIGGER WARNING*** on this for implied self-harm as per the tags. It's not graphic but please be warned if you are easily triggered. 
> 
> Had to post from my phone so please excuse any errors, I'll be proof reading and correcting them as I see them.

 

When Daryl hopped down the steps at the front of the house and made his way across the front field to the fence, he stopped momentarily to load his crossbow. Usually, such a task was done in the blink of an eye for him, but that was when he had the strength of both shoulders. He placed one foot in the stirrup, snapped a bolt into the flight groove and hauled back the string all with the weapon balanced against one leg and held feebly with his weakened arm. When he was able to throw it over his uninjured shoulder, he stayed put and studied the grass beneath his feet, kicking pebbles about with his boot. But the ground wasn’t what was occupying his thoughts, far from it.

_She kissed me._

Allowing a wide grin to span across his face, he huffed with happiness and looked up, carrying on along his route to the fence.

Each bedroom was vastly different from the next. The main, master suite was huge, with a gigantic, mahogany four poster bed, heavy drapes and walls filled with paintings similar to those in the art room. Lexie didn’t know if she wanted to be in such an enormous bedroom all by herself, so she opted for one of the smaller ones, with a light grey interior and bedsheets that matched with white and yellow flowers. The entire house was old-fashioned and it was evident that it had been occupied by an elderly couple in the last days before the turn but had probably once been a bustling family home with bedrooms befitting each person’s personality. Lexie retrieved her bag from the hallway downstairs and started to unpack her sketch pad, book, clothes, the rest of the Ragtime Rye and some candles she had managed to steal from Mel’s room as her own were running low.

When she had finished unpacking, she moved to the window to see Daryl skulking across the grass and blowing smoke from his nose. On the surface he looked scruffy and moody, nowhere near the type of guy that she would have considered being with even if she had intended to. But under his unkempt appearance and his gruff and occasionally abrupt persona, was a man so thoughtful and gentle that it simply stunned her every time she looked at him. She didn’t know what to expect from a first kiss with Daryl; maybe the smell of smoke and dirt, maybe a demanding touch or lips that kissed her roughly. But what she actually received was a sensual and passionate experience, hands that respected and caressed her and a kiss that was as much for her as it was for him and she knew that he was finding everything as exciting and terrifying as she was.

She turned from the window and decided to change clothes. Before she had left Alexandria, she and Mel and made their peace and Mel had even handed her a pile of clothes that she considered appropriate for a ‘vacation’. Lexie had picked out and discarded tiny bikini’s and G-strings and accepted the sensible items, thanking her sister with a mug of tea and a hug.

One of the nicer items in Mel’s generous offering was a long, white skirt that skimmed the floor, falling just long enough for Lexie’s height and flattering her midriff with a figure-hugging waistline. Slipping it on, Lexie kicked off her boots and socks and enjoyed the sensation of the warm, rural air as it swept around her legs and toes. She chose a black top with thin shoulder straps and wasted no time in heading back to the art room to begin rummaging around in the Aladdin’s cave of everything she loved.

Daryl found her an hour later sat on the floor surrounded by paintings and sketches and he could see that she was completely wrapped up in her own little world. On her lap, she held a giant stack of paper, each one boasting a different picture. She was sat cross legged, one toe poking out from her skirt and her hair tied up into a spiky, messy bun. To him, she looked so effortlessly stunning when she wasn’t doing much at all. Never one to be taken in by fake eyelashes, piles of make-up and skimpy clothing, he had been bowled over when he’d first laid eyes on Faith with her understated yet classy style and ability to command attention without the aid of masses of cosmetics. Now, he had found someone else that had no idea how naturally beautiful she was. She grinned up at him from the floor when he walked into the room and sat on a box in front of her.

“Look at all these. They’re so good! Whoever did these was really talented!” She said excitedly. “Look at this one, it’s the view from that window” she pointed at the large, acrylic painting on the easel and then to the window that provided a view of the front of the plot of land along with a picturesque vantage point of the hills beyond, before spotting another picture on the floor and grabbing that too. “And this, I think this was the couple that lived here.”

“It was” Daryl said “Aaron and I moved their bodies from the big bedroom. They checked out.”

Lexie’s face dropped a little “glad I didn’t pick that room.”

She set the picture back on the floor and resumed flicking through the stack on her lap. Her hair pinched at her scalp from being tied up too tight and she tugged at the elastic in it, slipping it out and allowing her hair to fall down her back. Daryl watched her, mesmerised at her small yet enthralling movements.

“Aaron helped you clear this place?” She mumbled quietly. At first, Daryl thought she was talking to herself when he registered her questioning tone.

“Yeah. Spent the day here. Wanted to make it safe.” He responded.

Although he didn’t say it, Lexie understood what he was saying. He had enlisted Aaron to help him make the house liveable, at least for a little while so he could bring her here and enjoy seeing the wonder and amazement on her face when she saw what was inside. He had done it for her. What’s more, Aaron had helped. It was an unfamiliar and not entirely unpleasant feeling to know that someone had gone out of their way for her. Mel and her parents had been the only ones to ever ensure that Lexie was happy, no matter what sacrifices it meant and in turn, she did the same for them.

“You and Aaron put up those fences, put locks on the doors and removed the bodies, you got my shifts covered and somehow managed to talk Deanna into letting me go out for a week with you after you just got stabbed. Not to mention the big ol’ bag of food you brought with us.”

“Mel helped with that.” He quickly added.

“Daryl.” She glared at him.

“Alright, fine. So, I made some arrangements.”

She smiled at him. A wide, sincere grin that showed her perfectly straight teeth and slightly dimpled cheeks.

“Thank you.” She uttered.

“No problem.”

She resumed her browsing of the stack of works in her lap, pulling out her favourites and making a pile of them next to her. Daryl could feel his shoulder aching with pain but the sight of her was making it all the more bearable. She was a welcome and delightful distraction. After a few minutes, he joined her on the floor, catching her off guard when he gathered up her pile of favourite pieces and began looking through them himself. She could see from the corner of her eyes that his attention waned every now and then as he looked at her closed sketchbook which was sitting under her knee. His curiosity about her talents only growing. 

They remained there for around half an hour, quietly discussing some of the images. Daryl didn’t bother to claim knowledge about anything remotely creative, at one point telling her that one of the pieces looked like a dog sat in paint and wipes its ass all over the place. Lexie laughed loudly and rocked back, holding her knees for support. The partially hidden, unintentionally sexy grin he sported making her want to jump on him and kiss him again. But she kept her self control, not wanting to push the boundaries just yet.

Eventually Daryl had left and a few minutes later a rumble seemed to roll through the walls of the house. The generator was working. A lamp in the corner of her room had flickered to life while she pulled back the covers to check for spiders and other insects. The daylight was fading outside and the dusty, tanned colouring of the hills surrounding them was gradually being cloaked in darkness.

Lexie went to seek Daryl out when the smell of food lured her downstairs, her grumbling stomach convincing her and leading the way. She arrived in time to find a steaming bowl of canned chilli and pasta on the kitchen countertop along with a bottle of beer. Daryl, who was halfway through his in the living room, paused when she entered the room and reached out to switch off the quiet music coming from the record player beside the couch. Lexie had no idea what it was and gathered that Daryl probably didn’t either. Regardless, she waved a hand at him, motioning for him to leave it on. The soft sounds of some kind of country ballad coupled with the two lanterns alight on the mantle gave the room an easy going but bordering on romantic feel. She settled on the adjacent couch and thudded her beer bottle down on the table between them.

“Romantic meal for two, huh?” She quipped as she began to hungrily work through the contents of her bowl.

“Yeah, right.” He replied, rolling his eyes, roughly dragging the back of his hand across his lips and sliding his bowl onto the coffee table.

Lexie just smiled at him between mouthfuls and paused to take a large gulp of her beer.

“How’s the shoulder?” She asked.

He leaned forwards and moved an arm across his chest, gently prodding the wound with his fingertips. His face winced for a second and he grunted.

“Sore.” He admitted.

She dropped her fork into her bowl and stared at him.

“Have you looked at it in a mirror recently?” She probed.

“Naw.” He answered curtly, leaning back again and downing the rest of the beer in his bottle in a series of deep gulps.

Lexie knew there was a chance that his wound could become infected no matter how well Denise had stitched him up. It was because of this that she had swiped a tube of antibiotic ointment from Mel’s room that she had failed to return to the Doctor’s office and stuffed it into her bag. She licked her lips slowly as she tried to figure out how to broach the subject without prodding at his temper. He had made no secret of the fact that he was frustrated and bored since being stabbed and had become touchy about the subject. For the time being, she sat and wordlessly and finished her meal, making a mental note to bring it up later on.

***** 

After dinner, Lexie had dragged some items from the art room into her bedroom and lit some candles. The generator was providing them with enough power to warm food and switch the odd light on, but they both agreed that lights were asking for trouble being so far out into the rural setting. They were at risk of attracting herds of Walkers or worse, people looking to rob and potentially hurt them. Candles would have to suffice behind drawn drapes which was fine with Lexie. The shadows created by a candle in front of a broken, old fashioned Teapot that she had placed on top of a set of draws gave her a nice subject for a sketch and she happily browsed the vast array of pencils on offer, having lined them all up along the nightstand.

She had been there for around an hour when Daryl seemed to appear from nowhere in the doorway. He held a bottle of water in his hand.

“Ya aint had any water today. Drink this.” He said, throwing the bottle at her.

She caught it and gave him a grateful smile. Nothing was getting past him. He had noticed her consumption of beer alone throughout the entire day and had been thoughtful enough to make sure she stayed hydrated. She unscrewed the cap and drank half of the bottle, realising just how thirsty she was when the liquid hit her throat. Her lungs burned as they gasped for breath when she finally put the cap back on and left the bottle beside her.

“Thank you. I’ve been so distracted I forgot.” She panted.

“Gotta drink. Can’t have ya passin’ out. ‘Sposed to be on vacation.” He told her as he leaned on the door frame and crossed his arms over his chest. The terrain of his biceps and forearms was now even more pronounced and she found it difficult to tear her eyes away.

“Come in, sit down.” She offered, if anything to get him to move so she could concentrate properly again and not feel so much like she was ogling him. He moved into the room and sat opposite her on the end of the bed. In her lap, she held her closed sketchpad.

“I have something to show you.” She told him.

His eyes flicked from her face to the bound paper in her hands and he shifted round, facing her more and bringing one leg up onto the covers. She opened the pad and flipped a few of the pages back, scanning the drawing in front of her with some anticipation. Her expression had changed and he could tell she was fretting, although she was hiding it well.

“Remember the first time you followed me to the abandoned store?” She questioned.

“Yeah”

“Remember every time you met me there after that?” She continued.

“Yeah, why?”

“Well, whenever I was there with you and I was drawing…” She turned the sketch pad around and held it out to him. “…I was drawing you.”

Daryl had to give himself a shove mentally to lift a hand and take the pad from her grasp. Looking back at him from the paper was a hyperrealist image of himself, sat back against the pillar in the abandoned store, one hand draped over a bent leg, head leaned back on the metal surface, hair partially obscuring one eye. His face in the drawing was downcast and pensive. The drawing was so detailed, so finely tuned that it flummoxed him into a long silence when finally, the sound of Lexie nervously gulping down more water snapped him back to the present.

“Gotta be kiddin’ me.” He muttered.

“You don’t like it. I shouldn’t have shown it to you.” She instantly retorted as she tried to reach for the pad. Daryl moved it out of her reach, holding it out so they could both see the drawing. Lexie recoiled against the pillows behind her and brought her knees up, her arms wrapping around them in a protective position. Gradually, he lowered the pad and looked at her.

“You drew this?” He asked, receiving a small nod. “Jesus.” He hissed.

She was still none the wiser. Was this a good reaction? Or a bad one?

Daryl studied the man in the drawing and didn’t dislike what he saw. He was rugged, handsome even with an air of strength and capability about him.

“This how ya see me?” He queried.

It was. She knew it was. But how honest should she be? Aware that conveying the truth to him might be a little too much, a little to soon. However, he had asked with the intention of receiving a truthful reply.

“Like I told you before, I draw how things make me feel. He makes me feel safe, accepted and content because he’s not just a fighter, a warrior… he’s also sensitive and selfless.” She confessed.

Daryl glanced from the drawing up at her and then back again, over and over until his eyes landed on her and stayed there.

“This guy, he’s a better version of me. Mean’s somethin’ that ya see me like that though.” He expressed.

“I see you how you are.” She said simply. “That’s you. He is you. Turn to the next page.”

He plucked at the page and folded it over, revealing another drawing. Daryl had never noticed just how busy the sides of his motorcycle looked before setting eyes on her impressive and accurate depiction of his pride and joy. It was as realistic as the image of him and a small exhalation escaped him as he looked over the sketch. He had never seen such realistic pencil drawings before and as he looked up at her, she saw his lips were parted and he was smiling ever so slightly, but she hadn’t missed it.

“Lexie, these are-they’re like damn photographs. I mean…they’re fuckin’ awesome.”

Her face began to radiate with heat as she blushed at the compliment. She tilted her head and pushed her lips together. Not being the best with compliments, she dipped her head and panicked a little.

_Say thank you. Just say it. You have to say thank you._

“Thank you.” She whispered.

“Can I see the others?” He asked. She appreciated the fact that he’d not already started rooting through the other drawings in the pad and had opted to ask her permission first.

“Yes. The next one is one of yours too.”

Relaxing slightly, she let her legs slide down the bed to straighten in front of her. Her bare feet and ankles almost reaching his knee. He stood up and stepped further up the bed. Lexie knew he wanted her to move over so he could sit next to her. She shifted to the side and he sank down next to her, copying her position and stretching his legs out in front of him. She chanced a minor touch and gently rested her head on his upper arm. He lifted the page, this time faced with another technically accurate and detailed depiction of his crossbow. She had even captured the weathered handle. He huffed to himself and shook his head.

“Fuckin’ ridiculous.” He scoffed under his breath.

“Why?” She probed.

“Never seen anythin’ like this before. I don’t know shit about art, but I know that ya got a real talent. These are unbelievable.” He affirmed.

Lexie peered up at him as he leaned down and kissed her forehead. She shrank shyly against his bare and muscular arm and thought it might have been the most appealing place she’d ever laid her head before. He continued through the sketchpad, coming across various inanimate objects that looked so real it was like he was able to reach out and grab them. Then, there were portraits. Mel, stood at the kitchen island wearing a loose, satin nightgown with barely-there straps. Her hair wavy and tussled as if she had just risen from bed. She looked down into a mug in her hand. Daryl hadn’t considered Mel to be an unattractive woman, she just wasn’t for him. But the drawing in front of him showed a side to her that he hadn’t seen, the vulnerable and unaware side to her that Lexie had managed to capture flawlessly.

“Mel seen this?” He asked.

“She thinks I don’t know that she can’t keep her fucking hands to herself and snoops in my room. So, probably.” She shrugged.

“Think she’d like this. She looks real nice.” He stated.

“Yeah. She’s a gorgeous looking woman. No surprise she’s always got some poor guy wrapped around her finger. What she lacks in brains, she makes up for with beauty” She voiced.

“You got both.” He responded without a second thought.

“I don’t, but thanks.” She breathed, trying not to giggle nervously.

“Whatever.” He shot back with a smirk.

The next one was of Aaron outside the armoury. Lexie remembered having to concentrate so hard on remembering the particulars of how he had looked in that moment that she had presented as uninterested and rude when Aaron had tried to make conversation. He had a Rifle slung over his shoulder and an empty gun holster strapped to his leg while he loaded a handgun. It had been a bright and severely hot day and he had shrugged his jacket off for a few minutes while he prepared to leave and his dark green T-shirt had given her the idea that he looked like a soldier. So, that’s how she drew him as she watched him prepare for a recruiting run one morning. She looked up and saw Daryl nod thoughtfully at the image.

“He’s gonna be real happy with that. Fancies himself as some kinda G.I Joe. But he drives slower than a month of Sunday’s and he don’t quit talkin’ all the live long day.” He joked.

Lexie giggled and slid her hand around his forearm.

“Aaron is so much braver than anyone gives him credit for.” She mused.

“Yeah. He really is” Daryl agreed as he flipped the pad shut. “Thanks for showin’ me.”

“You brought me on vacation. It was the least I could do.” She chirped.

She took the pad from him and sat up further, spotting that he was chewing his bottom lip and staring at her.

“Kiss was a hell of a thanks” He mumbled bashfully.

She wished her cheeks didn’t threaten to burn a bright red whenever a heavy layer of sexual tension cast over them. She had overcome a hurdle already that night, by allowing him to see her artwork, even images that she’d composed of him and things that made up his image. He had not judged, he had not laughed, he had been nothing but impressed and complimentary and as a result she felt an underlying confidence in her coming to the forefront. She sat up and levelled her eyes at him, noting that he was watching her as if she were all of a sudden, some unpredictable force that he had little idea how to handle.

_Oh, just do it._

She hitched her skirt up enough to straddle him, placing both hands on his chest, her eyes never leaving his. He had to tilt his head back slightly to be able to keep eye contact and his hands instinctively came to rest on her hips, not daring to touch bare skin just yet.

She gazed at him, something stopping her from proceeding straight away. It didn’t matter anymore when Daryl sat up closer to her, pulling on her hips and bending his legs at the knee, sliding her forwards and bringing her body closer to his. His hands moved up, snaking around her back and crossing over, holding her to him as she leaned down to kiss him, lacing both hands into his hair. She heard a small groan sound up from his chest and it was everything she needed to shove away her doubts and self-consciousness. Their tongues caressed, mingled together like a perfect match and she detected his hands moving again, further down, uncrossing and stopping briefly on her ass, fingertips gripping into her flesh and locking her to him. For a split second, she broke away from him, gasping and smiling in the small space between them. She grazed her teeth against his bottom lip, testing him, teasing him just like he did to her when he shifted his hips, lining her up perfectly with his erection and pushing it against her.

Daryl writhed, desperately trying to keep control of the explosion of pleasure that was igniting every cell in his body. The sounds of her gentle panting and feminine groans as he kissed her were driving him crazy and he wanted to touch her so badly. To slip his hands under her skirt and feel the delectable soft skin of her legs and thighs.

_Her straps. Pull her straps down._

He reached up and had them slid down her arms before she had even registered it, the front of her top stayed put, still clinging to her chest. He jolted back from her lips, flicking her hair over her shoulder and hungrily pressing his lips to her neck, gradually, intentionally kissing a trail down to her chest, meeting the top of her breast. It was fleeting, so quick he almost missed it, but she shuddered against him and sucked in a sharp breath, moaning loudly when his lips connected with the supple and enticing skin of her breast at the top of her bra. She was panting, unable to catch her breath from a situation so intense it was making her head spin.

 _Woah. She has a weak spot._ He thought. _I’ll be remembering that._

His fingers had now worked their way under her skirt and were feeling along her calves, skimming over her knees.

Lexie’s eyes snapped open. He was almost at her thighs.

_Shit. I’m wearing a skirt. I have to stop this before he sees._

Daryl tore himself away from her chest with the intention of leaning back and bringing her with him, but he winced with pain when his back pressed into the edge of the cushion behind him.

“Ow, fuck.” He hissed.

Lexie let out a sigh of relief that his hands had stopped, her head swimming with lust, worry, and concern.

“Are you OK?” She asked, a few strands of her hair sticking to her glistening lips and her very nearly exposed chest rising and falling in the flickering candlelight.

Daryl shook his head as he waited for the pain to subside. He rested his head back and looked up at her, gritting his teeth and trying to focus on how breath-taking she was instead of the agony that radiated from his shoulder. He lifted a hand and brushed her hair from her face while he took a deep, slow breath. The discomfort began to seep away and he attempted to continue his hands journey along her legs, managing to reach her mid-thigh before her hands had clamped tightly over his.

“N-No.” She croaked.

He didn’t need to question her, he could see the frightened look on her face that told him there was a very good reason why she wouldn’t let him go any further. Under his fingers, was a bumpy landscape and he knew everything had just changed. His heart ached for her. Her legs were covered with scars and it was unmistakeable to him. He knew what scars felt like better than most. She refused to meet his eye, her vision trained down and her face stony. She was frozen on top of him, her body completely rigid and her fingers performing a now vice like grip on his.

“Lexie.” He whispered. Her eyes were glossy when they shot up to his face but there was nothing behind them and he thought it was like her soul seemed to have left the room.

“Im’ma take my hands away, alright?” He asked.

She didn’t reply, only swallowing hard and blinking rapidly. Daryl began to pull his arms back out of her grip. She held on tight at first before finally letting go and it was like someone flicked a switch in her.

“Will you let me see your wound?” She questioned. She had to change the subject, try and divert his attention long enough for him to hopefully forget about what he’d felt.

“Naw, It’s fine.” He said.

 _And she’s back in the room._ He thought.

“But it’s hurting you. You should let me check it.” She continued.

“I said it’s fine. Where did ya get the scars?” He shot at her. It had never been meant to be as demanding and like an attack as it seemed when he said it. He cursed the fact that it sounded a hell of a lot better in his head.

She climbed from his lap and sat on the other edge of the bed, facing away from him. Daryl had never been great with tact and was aware he now had to proceed with extreme caution to prevent her from shutting down altogether. He knew she had scars, but what he didn’t know was why. Could she have been attacked? Abused like he had been? Was it the result of an accident? Her reaction indicated that whatever it was, she was less than enthusiastic to discuss it.

“M’sorry.” He mumbled, scooting over and sitting beside her. Her hands were clasped in her lap and she rotated one over the other constantly, wringing them and staring ahead at nothing in particular.

“I didn’t mean to sound like an asshole just then.” He assured her.

“It’s OK.” She uttered, still staring ahead.

“Lexie, will you look at me?” He pleaded, his heart sinking when she shook her head in dismissal.

Daryl had always avoided heart felt chats when he could, especially those concerning such delicate subject matter. Faith had inadvertently taught him a thing or two about expressing himself but he thought that had all vanished when she died. Sat with Lexie, he was searching the far corners of his mind for some way to get her to open up, unable to bare seeing her in such a frightened and withdrawn state.

“OK, um…” He started “…I’m not great at this, just remember I aint tryin to offend ya or some shit. Look, you let me bring ya out here alone, let me see ya drawings. Ya even kissed me when I almost pussied out again. That must mean you trust me. Do you? Do you trust me?”

She nodded and finally looked at him.

“Yes” she croaked.

“Alright. I trust you too. Enough to get this close to you after thinkin’ that was it for me.” He explained, reaching over and taking one of her hands, stopping her from wringing them and apparently calming her. Her shoulders slouched and she let out a steady breath.

“Did someone do that to you?” He pressed gently.

“Yes.” She replied.

“Who?”

“Me.”

His blood turned to ice for a few seconds until he was able to gather his thoughts. He leaned into her, placing a soft kiss on her bare shoulder.

“A long time ago.” She added. “Everything got really…intense.”

He slipped his hand out of hers. She looked at him in surprise for a moment before he held out his other hand in front of her, palm down. Her eyes dropped and she instantly wondered why she’d never noticed it before. The cluster of circular scars on his skin between his index finger and thumb.  

“I get it” He told her “Sometimes ya just need it to stop, even if it’s just for a while.”

Her eyes filled with tears at the realisation that she wasn’t the only one that had felt what it was like to need some respite from the emotional turmoil that can eat away at a person from the inside out. She raised a hand and curled her fingers around his, smoothing her thumb over his scars. He moved closer to her, his other arm linking around her back as he kissed her shoulder again.

“I have so many.” She whispered.

He nuzzled into the side of her face, breathing in the scent of the shampoo in her hair and closing his eyes.

“I don’t care.” He replied.

“They’re ugly.” She sighed

He pulled back and gave her a serious look.

“Hell, don’t talk shit, girl.” He said firmly. “Nothin’ on you is ugly.”

A ghost of a smile flickered across her features and Daryl felt a stab of relief when he saw it grow into a full smile.

“Feel like you just scolded me.” She laughed.

“Hmm. Don’t make me do it again.” He warned.

“Shame, that could be fun” She admitted, biting her lip.

“Huh. Yeah.” He huffed, the tips of his ears turning pink through his hair.

 

They lay there for hours, both of them staring up at the cracked and dusty ceiling. Lexie explained to Daryl how she had been deeply affected by her mother giving her away and her father not wanting her. She recalled how she had watched her mother beg him to take her as she sat in the passenger seat and tried to see what was going on through the blur of the rain hitting the windscreen. She wanted to see his face so much, that she wound the window down and leaned out, catching a clear glimpse of her real father as he turned to her mother and told her that he already had a daughter and that she was more important. She told him how she had been left with little to no self-worth or trust in anyone. She credited her adoptive parents with the fact that she hadn’t ended up in prison or some kind of mental health establishment, as they had shown her that she did deserve to be part of a family. But her life had been tarnished with the niggling doubt that whoever she got close to would end up leaving in the end. She told him that when her adoptive mother got cancer, her world crashed around her and she slipped into a deep depression that was exhausting enough on its own, without having to pretend that everything was fine on the surface for what turned out to be years of a recurring illness.

Daryl listened intently to her story, thankful that she had eventually been so forthcoming with information. Now, he felt better equipped to deal with whatever was going on between them. She hadn’t shied away from asking him about the scars on his hand and it surprised him when for the first time since it happened, he was able to talk about how he had witnessed the murder of someone from their group and had blamed himself ever since without feeling an intense and uncontrollable rage. In fact, he felt nothing but release. A long-awaited acceptance.

The temperature had dropped dramatically to the point that Lexie wondered if the walls were made of paper. She had pulled a decorative throw that was at the bottom of the bed over them both as they talked.

“Should we take it in turns to be on watch?” Lexie asked. Her experience with overnight runs had been that one person stayed on watch while the other slept and it was done in shifts. But Daryl shook his head.

“Naw, We’re safe enough here. Nothin’ or no one gettin’ in here without me hearin’ it.” He assured her.

“OK, then what bedroom are you taking?” She probed.

“I dunno yet.”

“Should just stay here with me.” She suggested. “We’ve been flat out next to one another all this time anyway.”

Not wanting to be presumptuous, he sat up and ran a hand over his face before getting to his feet.

“Nah, ya don’t want me in here with ya.” He scoffed.

“Yes, I do.” She shot back. “This bed is huge, there’s enough room for both of us”

He rocked back and forth on his heels while he weighed up if it was a bad idea or not, concluding that if he was honest with himself, he didn’t want to be anywhere else anyway.

“Alright.” He agreed. “Probably better this way. It’s colder than a penguins balls in here.”


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am DEAD FROM FLUFF.  
> Enjoy this self-indulgent, fluff fest. For now ;)  
> Some of you regular readers of my stuff will notice similarities in dialogue or situations. It's mainly because they relate directly to Daryl and the odd thing he says or does in the show. There are some things i just adore and use in every story I write. For example "You better watch your mouth, Sunshine." :) SO, it is very deliberate and not at all accidental! 
> 
> The song lyrics used in this chapter are from The Cinematic Orchestra’s ‘To build a home’.  
> It’s a gorgeous song, check it out. 
> 
> Thank you for every comment and Kudos. I always try my best to reply to everyone. <3

She woke in the middle of the night to find Daryl awake and sitting at the window on the wide, cushioned ledge. He had opened the drapes and moonlight poured through the glass, creating a white glow in the middle of the room. Resting against his legs was Lexie’s sketchpad. He was slowly flipping through her drawings, unaware that there was another pad in her bag that she hadn’t yet shown him. She lay motionless and studied him. He had found a spare blanket in the closet and draped it over his shoulders to protect himself from the biting cold in the room. He was pensive, but his usual underlying sadness seemed to have dissipated. She admired his muscular frame, the way he always nibbled or sucked on his bottom lip when he was thinking, his scruffy and slightly wavy hair and the way he used it as a barrier to hide what he was really thinking. He was multi-layered, complicated and had so much more depth than she had ever imagined.

“Why aren’t you asleep?” He asked without looking over at her. Somehow, he had been able to sense that she was awake and she suspected that there wasn’t much she would be able to keep from him. By now, she knew that Daryl was intuitive even if he didn’t know it himself. It was part of the reason he was such a good tracker and hunter.

“Why aren’t you?” She replied.

“Don’t sleep much.”

“Neither do I.”

“Thought I heard somethin’ too. But it was just a bird on the fence.” He mumbled to himself as he got up and left her sketchbook on the window ledge. Getting back into bed, he slipped under the covers and lay on his side, facing her. She could just about see his face in the light of the moon through the window. She shuffled closer to him and tenderly stroked his forehead and cheek, moving his hair aside. She thought back to their first kiss and how it all transpired. She was glad she took a second to really look at him. He was so new and unfamiliar. She didn’t know how he tasted, how his hands would feel on her at the final second before it happened. She wouldn’t see him like that again, the apprehension in his eyes. In his mind, she was also uncharted territory to him. And so, she kept it. Whatever happened, that’s how she would never lose him, as long as she had that memory.

Blinking away sleep in the morning sun, Lexie was pleased to find she had managed to fall asleep again and not wake until morning. She reached her arm out to the other side of the bed, finding the comfortable warmth of Daryl’s arm. As her fingers touched his skin, he flinched and his eyes snapped open. At first, he had no idea where he was, why he was there or who he was with but everything gradually came back to him while his eyes adjusted to the veined cracks in the paintwork on the ceiling and he heard Lexie let out a small exhalation as she grinned broadly at him.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you.” She whispered.

The rooms temperature had shot up as the sun had risen and Daryl had completely discarded the sheets, laying beside her in his jeans and shirt having decided to remain respectful and keep his clothes on. Lexie had pushed the sheets down to her waist, giving him a glorious view of her in a thin, white tank top as she lay on her back with her head turned to him. His body screamed at him to roll over on top of her and kiss her, to work his way down to her chest and peel her clothes off. But he was resigned to lay there with a raging, morning hard-on that he was extremely grateful she couldn’t see thanks to the covers being bunched up between them into a linen wall.

“S’alright” He grumbled, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands and tensing all of his muscles in a gloriously satisfying stretch.

Lexie licked her lips at the sight of it and had absolutely no doubt in her mind that when the ‘deal’ as Aaron had called it, was finally sealed, she would enjoy every rippled, taut and toned second of it.

“Is your shoulder OK?” She asked.

He couldn’t look at her and he wished she would just pull the sheets up so he could answer her without having to keep looking up at the ceiling.

“S’better.” He mumbled.

“It’s been a week now; the stitches will need to come out soon.” She told him, turning onto her side.

He hazarded a peek at her and his heart jumped when he saw her bright eyes lit by the reflection of the sun beaming through the window. Her nose was ever so slightly freckled and her high cheekbones were highlighted in the glow of the room. The front of her hair lay in a fine curl across her cheek. She was stunning, possibly the prettiest thing he had ever seen since Faith and something he never thought he would see again.

“As much as I want to stay here all week. I think we should head back in a couple days. Let Denise take a look at your wound.” She suggested.

“Can come back whenever ya want.” He assured her, agreeing without having to say it.

“Only with you.” She smiled.

“I’m good with that.”

“C’mon, let’s get up. I need coffee and food and a wash.” She announced, sitting up and swinging her legs from the bed. Daryl hauled his body up slightly and propped himself up on his elbows. Ignoring the dull ache in his shoulder, he watched her closely as she ran her hands through the dark strands of her hair and allowed it to fall like a waterfall around her shoulders. She wore baggy lounge pants that clung to her hips as she stood up and began rummaging through a drawer. She pulled out a pile of clothes and turned to him, clutching them to her abdomen.

“You expecting breakfast in bed or something?” She quipped, tilting her head to one side.

Daryl cleared his throat and tore his eyes away from her, shuffling around and dragging the covers over his hips. He hoped that she would make a different choice about her night time attire the next night, sparing him the agony of having to remain gentlemanly and not stare at her chest through a tank top that left almost nothing to the imagination.

 _Damn. Can see clear to the promised land._ He thought.

“Uh, gimme a minute, shoulder needs to adjust.” He lied.

“OK” She chirped “See you downstairs.”

As soon as she left the room, he flopped back onto the pillow and let out a long and frustrated sigh. For so many months, sex had crossed his mind a total of zero times while he was busy surviving and trying to cope not only with the loss of Faith, but many others the group had mourned since. Now Lexie was in his life and constantly in the same vicinity with her athletic and enticing body and thin clothing he was struggling to keep his mind from straying. Although he knew it wasn’t exactly a bad thing having accepted that he not only cared about her, but thought she was incredibly attractive, he still felt a sting of guilt for being unable to ignore how much he wanted her physically at such early stages in whatever was happening between them.

 *****

Lexie filled an empty gas can with water from a well out in the yard, the Farm house’s own water supply. She attached a shower head to the hole before wedging it between the ceiling and shower rail in the bathroom. Daryl had explained that the water would suffice for washing but it would need to be boiled numerous times on the electric stove top to be useful for consumption. She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror before she undressed and her mouth fell open at the sight.

_I’m going to strangle that sister of mine._

“Oh lord” She sighed to herself when she realised how transparent her top was. Mel had given it to her, telling her it was perfect for sleeping in due to its lack of seams and Lexie had been slightly puzzled when Mel winked as she threw it at her. Not thinking much of it and against her better judgement, she had just thrown it on in her tired state the previous night and thought nothing of it.

“So much for keeping the mystery.” She shrugged before undressing and stepping into the tub.

 *****

Her fingers flittered over the black and white keys, creating a tune so opposite to the terrors of the new world that it was a profound escape. It paused time, filling her soul with memories before the turn that she could see when she closed her eyes. Her adoptive mother had taught her how to play after only a day of her being moved into the family home. She would sit for hours with Lexie, gently encouraging her to practice over and over until she was proficient in playing the piano by the tender age of nine. After that, Lexie began to write her own music that was also formed out of her love of literature and creative writing and she would perform religiously for an hour every day when she returned home from school. Until one day, she stopped.

Sitting in front of the partially covered Grand Piano in a back room of the house, she began to sing, her eyes pressed shut and her voice sounding out in nothing but a croak at first, the words coming to her effortlessly.

 

Daryl had heard the sound of the Piano from outside the house, where he had been collecting firewood to use in the fireplace of the room Lexie was staying in and the living room with the intention of pre-warming the house before the night cloaked it in and an icy chill that crept into his bones. Wandering inside as quietly as possible with his crossbow held by his good arm, he leaned on the doorframe and watched her. She had her back to him, her braided hair pulled to one side over her collarbone. She wore a black sweater that was cut off at the shoulders and her khaki green, tight, army style pants. Her hands glided over the keys and she tilted her head to one side after releasing a long and peaceful sigh.

 

_“There is a house built out of stone._

_Wooden floors, walls and window sills._

_Tables and chairs, worn by all of the dust_

_This is a place where I don’t feel alone_

_This is a place where I feel at home”_

 

Her voice was like nothing Daryl had ever heard in his life. He had heard the early morning song of the birds when they coaxed him around from sleep, the rush of a stream over the rocks after a storm and the wind whistle through the leaves of the trees as he lay beneath them after the hunt. But the comparison of the most memorable natural sounds was nothing compared to the controlled and beautifully pitched singing of the woman he had come to care so much about.

 

_“’Cause I built a home_

_For you_

_For me_

_Until it disappeared_

_From me_

_From you_

_And now it’s time to leave, and turn to dust.”_

 

Lexie paused to let the words fill her mind, to help her search for more, to discover what she wanted to say. Then she jumped and bashed the piano accidentally when Daryl dropped his crossbow.

“Holy shit” She gasped, her hand coming to her chest. She spun around to see him awkwardly frozen in the doorway, his eyes darting from her to the floor.

“Sorry” He mumbled as he quickly picked up the weapon.

“I didn’t know you were there.” She panted. She thudded the piano’s lid down and stood up, winding her hands around inside the sleeves of her sweater.

“You play the piano…n’ sing.” He stated.

“My adoptive mother taught me. My father taught me the guitar.” She mentioned.

Daryl raised an eyebrow in surprise while he moved closer and took hold of the sheet that covered the rest of the piano. It was black and shiny underneath, in near perfect condition for something that had been left dormant for so long.

“So, lemme get this straight; you’re an artist, a dancer, a hunter, an expert marksman and firearms know-it-all, and a musician. Nothin ya can’t do, huh?”

She scoffed loudly and rolled her eyes at him.

“There’s plenty I can’t do. I can’t boil an egg or cook rice properly. I can’t whistle. I can’t eat spaghetti without wearing most of it. I have to wear my ‘spaghetti Wednesday shirt’ when I go to dinner at Aaron and Eric’s. I can’t drink Ragtime Rye without making an ass out of myself. I can’t flirt and I’m pretty damn bad at being a girl.” She listed.

Daryl smiled briefly as he set himself down on a couch in the corner of the room. He threw his heavy boots up onto the arm and reclined, wriggling slightly until his shoulder was comfortable enough and lifting one arm behind his head.

“What are you doing?” she asked

“We only got old country songs for the record player n’ there aint no jukebox. So, carry on.” He said, waving his hand at her.

“Oh no, you’ve heard enough” She declined

“Aww c’mon!” He protested.

She walked over to him, giving him a stern look.  

“Fine, but not today and I don’t work for free, so you have to earn it.” She proposed.

“Gonna tell me how im’ma do that?” He asked.

Holding herself steady with a hand on the arm of the couch beneath his head, she lowered herself above him so she could leave a long, lingering kiss on his lips. He could feel the testosterone thundering through his veins once more.

_Shit, she only has to touch me._

His hand lifted and took hold of the back of her arm in an attempt to keep her there but she moved back. In defiance, he rose up from his position wanting to prolong the kiss but she broke away and grinned at him.  

“Surprise me. Be brave.” She purred.

She stood up straight, turned and went to walk out of the room.

“Hey” he called out.

She stopped and looked over her shoulder.

“Don’t be doin’ that shit to me after tellin’ me ya can’t flirt.” He shot at her.

She flashed him a triumphant smile before disappearing and leaving Daryl alone with his imagination kicked into overdrive once more.

***** 

“Daryl, you have to let me see that wound. Please.” She begged from the door of the bathroom while Daryl twisted around in front of the mirror with his arm linked over his shoulder, pulling at the seam where his sleeve had been removed. He wasn’t about to let her see his back and in turn discover a lot more about his past that he would rather forget. However, he had to admit that giving her permission to check the wound wasn’t such a bad idea. He reluctantly agreed and whirled around, stalking into her bedroom and plonking down on the bed. She followed silently and climbed onto the mattress beside him, sitting with her legs folded underneath her. He unbuttoned his shirt and threaded one arm out of the hole, tugging it from his shoulder blade and keeping hold of the rest of the garment to stop it exposing any more of his back.

“Just my shoulder.” He told her.

Lexie’s eyes swept over the neatly stitched wound that stretched for at least 5 inches, as if the blade had been sunk into his skin and dragged. She understood why it was still so painful now. Along with this, were three more marks, obviously old scars that made her wince. They ran deep and over lapped in a brutal and savage fashion. She lightly touched them with her index finger and he shied away, locking eyes with her. His expression wasn’t one of anger, more one of discomfort and pleading.

_You said you wanted to check my wound. Please don’t look at anything else._

“What are they, Daryl?” She asked caringly

“They’re from a long a time ago.” He murmured sadly.

“So were mine.” She politely reminded him, kickstarting a thought process in his head that could have done without, but knew he had to acknowledge. She was right, hers were from a long time ago and he had shown her the cigarette burn scars on his hand, courtesy of his own guilt and despair which had persuaded her to open up. She had been graceful and honest enough to explain to him where they had come from. But his story was not one of self-injury, it was something else altogether.

“My brother and me, we wern’t from no happy family.” He began, his held low and his hair covering his eyes so Lexie couldn’t read them. She sat facing him, with her legs tucked under her and her hand tenderly resting on his upper arm. “Got a lot of memories of fightin’. My mom and dad fightin’, Merle and my dad fightin’, Merle and me fightin’. My mom, she was a drinker. She burned down the house, killed herself. It was an accident but everybody said it was better that way.”

He heard Lexie sigh from beside him and noticed her thumb was grazing back and forth over the skin of his arm as if she were soothing him to continue.

“My ol’ man, he was a drinker too. Beat the holy hell outta my brother. When Merle was in Juvy, and when left to join the military, the son of a bitch turned on me. The scars are from his fuckin' belt”

He expected some kind of shock from her, a gasp or the removal of her hand. But she was still.

“I’m sorry that happened to you.” She whispered.

“It aint no thing now. It’s done.” He told her.

“But it’s not.” She added. He looked up at her, curiosity filling his blue eyes. “You don’t shy away from violence. Aaron’s told me; you’re fearless. Which is a good thing. But it has to come from somewhere and it comes at a cost.”

He furrowed his brow, unable to disagree with her.

“You some kind of secret shrink too?” He joked instead.

She slid her hand down his arm, lacing their fingers together. She had been forced to face some truths in her life, even before the turn. Coming to terms with being given up as a child had taken years of soul searching and trial and error during her teenage years. But it had produced a kind of strength in her, a resilience and knowledge that she could face anything and would find it in her somewhere to push through it, to come out the other side with lessons learned and a clearer perspective, because she had found a way to accept her issues, to live with them and in the process, she had found herself.

“I just know how it works.” She pointed out. “You have demons. What you went through back then has paved the way for how you lived your life as an adult. You’re quiet and you do everything in your power to avoid connecting with most people. Those you do connect with, you are unwaveringly loyal to because they have shown you that they are worth your loyalty. You’re also angry and it’s because you had to live with what happened to you, you had to wear the physical and emotional scars, with no help to overcome them. I know, because although our pasts aren’t the same…I’m fucking angry too.”

Daryl hadn’t been the subject of such scrutiny before. He hadn’t ever known what it was like to have someone sit him down and relate to him on such a level before. Faith had accepted him for his past, his flaws, his personality traits that were no doubt a symptom of his past. But no one had been able to explain the way he was so fittingly and in such a short space of time. There had been moments in his teens and early twenties when he and Jen would sit and get high or drunk and complain about their respective families, their shitty lives and how they wished they could just run away and live in the woods. Jen understood, but she had become more of a slave to her issues than Daryl and in the grand scheme of things, that gave him a greater perspective of how far he’d come.

“Said it comes at a cost.” He commented. “What cost?”

She let go of his hand and lifted his shirt back over his shoulder, covering his wound and scars. She then deliberately dragged her hand over his back, working from side to side as she felt over the bumpy surface.

Usually, any contact made with his scars by anyone else meant he would flinch and move away. Lexie instilled a certain peace in him, a stillness that meant he not only endured it, but found it calmed the noise in his head from recalling memories he wished he could erase.

“You’re not afraid to die.” She whispered. “That’s why you thrive in this world. It’s why you’ve survived for so long. Violence is nothing to you. But there’s a part of you that’s always been there. Your sensitive and gentle side that’s been stuffed down into an abyss in your soul that your demons sit and guard and they fight it anytime it finds the strength to try and escape.”

He met her eye again and she was now resting her chin on his shoulder, childlike but so ingeniously perceptive.

“My demons distracted yours, they play well together. So, here you are, the Daryl you always were, but were never able to be.” She smiled.

He stared at her, unable to react when she kissed his lips lightly because he was too preoccupied with her astoundingly accurate and profound perception of him.

“The hell did you come from?” Was all he could manage, his voice a hushed, breathy whisper.

Lexie grinned at him and climbed down from the bed.

“Your wound doesn’t look infected. But I’m guessing it’s sore because everything is starting to knit back together inside and your stitches need to come out. Here, put some of this on it” She instructed, snatching a tube from the top of the drawers behind her and throwing it into his lap.” Her tone was in a surprisingly matter of fact considering the heavy subject matter they had been discussing.

Daryl looked down into his lap and picked up the tube, examining the label.

“Gonna tell me why ya got this?" He asked, wondering how she managed to sneak it out of the Doctors office.

“I know you’re a stubborn son of a bitch that would ignore it if it got infected so I brought it from the house.” She replied directly.

Daryl blinked up at her in disbelief.

“You better watch your mouth, Sunshine.” He smirked.

Lexie swallowed hard and fiddled with the edges of the sleeves on her sweater, apparently somewhat bashful and Daryl regarded her with a raised eyebrow.

“I like that” She admitted.

“What?”

“You called me ‘Sunshine’. I could live with that.”

Her face reddened and Daryl wished he could snapshot the moment and replay it every time he needed something incredibly endearing to distract him from the demons she knew so much about and the world around them that she brightened with her vulnerable and shy tendencies.

“Suits you.” He remarked.

“Stop distracting me and put that shit on your wound.” She laughed, pointing at him.

“Jesus. Alright, mom.” He joked.

“Oh, shut up. You know I’m right. One more day here and we’ll head back to Alexandria. You need to see Denise” She informed him before she backed to the door, turned and left the room.

Daryl just sat and blinked at the empty space where she stood, not even being able to push his arm back through his shirt. He was reeling. Finally, able to see his life, his choices, his behaviour and his thoughts with more clarity. Thanks to her.

 ***** 

That night, Daryl was thumbing through Lexie’s copy of To Kill A Mockingbird while she changed in the bathroom. His eyes wandered over the drawings of the characters at the beginning of each chapter, characters in their own fictional worlds. He wondered how many people had written books and screenplays about the zombie apocalypse and how accurate they had been. If they had thought of the eventual decay as time went on, not just to the Walkers, but to the world in general. Buildings would crumble, gas would run out, nature would take back over again, green seeping across everything man made and leaving little trace of any of us in the end. He considered that maybe this was how it was meant to be all along.

When Lexie appeared, he bent his legs and held the book higher, resting it on his knees and peering at her over the top of the pages as she pottered about the room, brushing her hair and drawing her large sweater around her shoulders. He had been relieved to see that her choice of top for the night had changed and she’d opted for a black one instead. But although he could see less of her, her shape was still evident and she was just as attention grabbing as ever.

She smiled at him over her shoulder.

“You’re reading?” She questioned.

He held the book up, showing her the page that he had stopped on. Chapter 5, detailed with a black and white sketch.

“Ah, of course, you’re a picture book kind of guy.” She beamed as she wandered to the door and closed it. She draped her sweater over the covers on the bed and slipped between the sheets. Daryl, who was once again was fully clothed, glanced down at his arm, where she was tracing small shapes over his skin with her index finger. He placed the book on the nightstand and blew out the candle next to him, cloaking everything in darkness. Lexie snuggled into him, resting her head on his chest after he had uneasily lifted his arm and allowed her closer to him. He remained on top of the covers with a blanket over him, knowing his desire to be close to her meant he had to stick to his boundaries in case he scared her off completely.

 *****

The next day, Lexie had woken to an empty bed. She dressed and found Daryl in the Piano room, sat in the corner on the couch with his lap covered in bits of wood which he was carving into bolts for his crossbow. He looked up at her and flicked his eyes over to the piano, gesturing for her to sit down and play. He only received a shake of her head and a reminder that he had yet to surprise her.

He didn’t see her for a number of hours after that when she retreated into the art room and immersed herself in drawing and painting all day. Emerging only for water with hands covered in a myriad of coloured paint. She wore her army pants and a black button down with her hair scraped into a bun, coupled with a headband to keep odd strands from falling into her face.

When Daryl had ventured upstairs into the room, he found her cross legged on a wooden chair, in front of an easel, eagerly painting her own depiction of what was beyond glass of the window. She had said nothing when he walked into the room and did nothing to stop him from standing behind her and taking a look at her work. The painting was just as impressive as her sketches, every fine detail lovingly crafted with accuracy and perfection. He was in awe of her talents and found it hard to believe that one person could be so good at so many things and yet be so secretive about them. He felt privileged and honoured that she trusted him enough to share her work with him. It was more than she had allowed anyone, not even her sister.

 *****

Evening arrived and after they ate, Lexie cleaned up in the kitchen. She had untied her hair and removed her headband, gliding around the room in her bare feet completely unaware that Daryl was glaring at her from a chair in the living room. He could see her clearly through the doorway, the glow from a lantern on a shelf highlighting her curves as she worked. He could hear her humming a tune to herself and it reminded him of their deal. It was their last night and he figured that if he were going surprise her and earn himself a performance on the piano, doing it here, away from the prying eyes of Alexandria, was a wise idea. He was under no illusion that he would have to pull off something pretty bold to surprise her considering the deep and at times, difficult subject matter they had discussed. They had learned a lot about one another in a short space of time and it had left him with little option than to take a risk. If he was completely honest with himself, he didn’t care a great deal about the piano, he just wanted a chance to test the water and see how she would react to his unexpected actions.

_Don’t fuck this up._

He got up and padded into the kitchen. She did a double take when she noticed him shrug his leather vest off and fold it over the back of a chair. He never took it off unless he was in bed or keeping an eye on his injured shoulder. Deciding against questioning him about it, she carried on packing tins into a box for their departure in the morning.

“So, ya wanna head back tomorrow.” He commented.

“I don’t want to. But we should. You need to get your shoulder looked at and I need to make sure Mel hasn’t jumped into bed with Spencer again.” She shrugged.

“Alright. This is our last night then.” He pointed out.

Her body tensed. Hands came from behind her and he pushed her against the countertop with his hands on her hips. Not hard enough to hurt her but not feeble enough for her to resist. His arms crossed across her abdomen and he kissed her shoulder. She was so stunned she was only able to focus on one thing, a single, misaligned tile in front of her on the wall.

 _Look at that._ She thought. _How could they leave it like that?_

She snapped back to reality when he spun her around and wrapped her in his strong arms, lifting her from the floor and sitting her on the countertop. His shoulder throbbed but he simply ignored it. This was more important.

“Daryl, your shoulder.” She fretted.

“Shut up.” He growled.

She startled a little at his abrupt and bossy tone but realised she didn’t totally dislike it. His lips crashed to hers and she couldn’t help but grin against him. Able to sense her smiling only fuelled his determination and he had the reassurance he needed to continue. Every time his lips left hers for a split second, she giggled softly, having realised exactly what he was doing. He turned his attention to her neck, kissing along her jaw and smoothing his palms up her legs and over her thighs to her hips. She revelled in hearing his shallow breaths in her ear as he kissed her neck. She rolled her head back and grabbed fistfuls of his long hair. It was greasy and sweaty between her fingers but didn’t care, she loved his touch and the way he had the scent of cigarettes and leather.

“Daryl-“ She gasped.

“Stop talkin’.” He snapped

_OK. Fine. Wow._

Her hands reached under his shirt, finding his bare skin above his waistline and she trailed her fingertips up and down his torso, gathering his clothing at the front. He shivered against her and she giggled again. Despite the electric tension between them and the fierce and powerful desire to have one another, Lexie was sure beyond a doubt that he would not push her all the way. In fact, she knew he would stop at some point soon but intended to enjoy every second while it lasted. She was beginning to see a side to him that was both quietly and secretly confident, a world away from how shy she had expected him to be. She imagined that he could have thought the same of her, but she trusted him and that in turn had coaxed her to overcome some of her shyness.

“I know what you’re doing” She sighed happily “I know you want a song.”

“That aint all I want.” He rasped.

“What else do you want?” She pressed.

He was biting her ear, making her squirm. “Sure you wanna know?”

“Yes.”

He stopped kissing her and brought his face close to hers, resting their foreheads together. Her body exploded with anticipation as he held up his hand in front of her, her eyes jolting to them before returning to his face. He began to slowly and purposefully touch all the different parts of her. Starting with her arms, switching to her hands and then over her stomach. Not wanting to cross any lines with her, he only bumped very lightly over her breasts and used his thumbs to rub over her inner thighs once again and she let him, trusting him without a doubt.

“Sure I aint surprised ya enough?” He whispered.

“I think you can be braver.” She teased.

“Hmm” he growled, levelling his mouth with her ear and spreading his hands out on either side of her torso, spanning her ribs and back. He was holding her so tightly, she could feel the urgent digging of his fingertips through her clothing. “Fine. But you asked for this...”

He seemed to hesitate, to second guess what he was about to say, but he could sense her practically begging him to finish his sentence and that alone cemented his choice.

“…you’re so beautiful, I wanna touch every fuckin’ inch of you.”

She was utterly speechless. After a few dizzying seconds, she tried so say something multiple times but nothing happened, the words catching in her throat and vanishing. Moving back around to her face, her kissed her again, more roughly this time, a slight nip of her bottom lip sending shockwaves straight to her nerves.

Daryl could tell his actions had resulted in the desired effect, in fact, it was even better than he’d first thought. But he still had second thoughts about saying anything else. In effect, he was reasonably shy about intimacy until he was comfortable with someone, but Lexie had proved on more than one occasion that she wasn’t about to scream in horror and run away, after having made some moves herself and proving her interest in him ran deeper than he thought. After all, she had been the one to go through with their first kiss. He took in a slow but subtle deep breath and reached around her shoulders, bringing her hair behind her back and leaning back in, close to her ear. His chest was pressed to hers and she thought she might die with delight. Suffocate in the delicious sensation of his body against hers.

“But we gonna take it slow, right?” He breathed, she could hear him bordering on panting and the sexual tension between them was leaving her teetering on the edge of giving in. Like a devil on her shoulder prodding her, closer and closer to the edge.

“Yeah. We should, get to know each other…take it-take it slow.” She stammered, now only half believing in what she was saying.

“So slow that when it happens, Im’ma keep you in bed with me all day… tastin’ you like it’s some kinda sin.” He rasped.

_Oh. My. God._

Her breath hitched in her throat and her eyes widened at such a brash and graphic confession from him. She knew he was coming out of his shell, but she had no idea he was as comfortable as that with her. It occurred to her that she was in the throes of what was the most intimate moment of her entire life without having shed an item of clothing or doing more than letting him kiss her and talk to her. What was even more tantalising, was that he was leading the entire thing

“You’re really good at this” She breathed as she endured the massive flood of gratification that crashed through her body, the mental picture he had created burning its self into her imagination.

“I want you so bad” He admitted, nudging her straps over her shoulder. Her skin tingled where his lips left small kisses on her collarbone.  

“It’ll be worth waiting for” She grinned, her fingertips now tucked into the top of his jeans, firmly holding him to her between her legs.

He leaned back to face her and she placed a hand on his cheek, noting the deep shade of pink his ears had turned. His fingertips were still working on her neck, shoulder and collarbone, occasionally wandering to her chest with his index finger, drawing lines back and forth.

“This earn me a song, Sunshine?” He asked, now visibly bashful again.

“I think it does.” She beamed.

He continued to journey over her shoulder and chest, his eyes examining the alluring, silky surface and moving up to her face from time to time. Seconds passed that soon turned to minutes as she closed her eyes and indulged in his gentle caress.

“Lexie” He rasped.

“Mm?” Her eyes were still closed, willing him to continue tickling her.

“I don’t do this. At all. I mean, Faith was the last- only one it meant anything with.”

Her eyes opened and she considered what it was he was actually telling her. In his own way, he was trying to put across that intimacy was a huge deal to him. That for him to put himself in such a vulnerable position like this took a lot more than just lust.

“OK.” She replied, unsure of what exactly he wanted her to say.

“I have to… I dunno, feel somethin. I trusted Faith.” His face was etched into a confused expression. “I trust you.”

“You don’t have to explain. I am very aware that no one else except her has seen this side to you. She was very lucky. And so am I.” She told him with a gentle kiss. “As long as you don’t regret anything.”

His shyness was now back with full force and she could detect it straight away when his eyes started to dart around everywhere but on her. It took him a few seconds to respond and Lexie felt a rising sense of doom while she waited.

“No” he finally uttered “I don’t regret nothin’. Do you?”

“Daryl, I’m sat here with my legs wrapped around you and my fingers in the waistband of your pants and all I can think about is how happy I am. I don’t regret a thing.”

He shot her a small smile, seemingly satisfied with her answer as he gradually slid her straps back up her arm and settled them on her shoulder.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Once again, thank you for all the comments! LOVE!
> 
> For anyone who's curious to see the face behind the writing, you can see a photo of yours truly over on my Tumblr account here: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/xmistressmistrustx  
> This will only be up temporarily because I like to retain a somewhat anonymous persona on here. But I've noticed I have a few regular readers on all of my fics, So this is me saying hi! I guess you can see why my OC's are all slightly alternative. 
> 
> The song lyrics in this chapter are not mine. They're from 'Right where it belongs' By Nine Inch Nails.
> 
> This is a reasonably long one, enjoy!

There was always a chance that someone else would find the artists house and set up camp in it. All the art supplies and the piano could be wasted, but it was something Lexie had to come to terms with. Daryl had told her he would come back with her whenever she wanted to, but that would only be a good thing if it remained unchanged. She took the chance to stock up while they were still there and packed a wooden crate that she had found in one of the bedrooms full of pencils and paper, a few paints and various small items like erasers, masking fluid and varnish. If she were to never return, at least she would have taken something physical from her time there, as well as all the emotional triumphs too.

She wished she could take the piano back with them, it would be so very satisfying to torture Mel with at all hours of the day. She had never liked hearing Lexie play when they were kids, but Lexie knew better than Mel thought she did. She didn’t hate the sound of the instrument or the words of the songs. What she hated with a jealous rage was how much time Lexie got to spend with their mother.

Sitting at the piano with her fingers resting weightlessly on the keys, she heard Daryl step into the room having returned from packing the truck.

“Sit down.” She said without turning around. She lightly patted the empty side of the stool she was sitting on and waited. He dutifully obeyed her request and sank down beside her. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, something that she had to do to be able to see the words she needed to say, to be able to feel them and piece them together like a puzzle. Her hands started to skim over the keys pressing them in sequence and Daryl was already totally mesmerized.

_See the animal in his cage that you built_

_Are you sure what side you're on?_

_Better not look him too closely in the eye_

_Are you sure what side of the glass you are on?_

_See the safety of the life you have built_

_Everything where it belongs_

_Feel the hollowness inside of your heart_

_And it's all right where it belongs_

Her voice was mellow, tuneful yet not forced. He could listen to her for hours, days and never feel a shred of stress ever again if she could only follow him around with a piano and her songs. He listened carefully to the lyrics, the bleak, hopelessness of them and the direct nature of their questioning structure. Was she questioning herself, or him?

_What if everything around you Isn't quite as it seems?_

_What if all the world you think you know Is an elaborate dream?_

_And if you look at your reflection Is it all you want it to be?_

_What if you could look right through the cracks?_

_Would you find yourself find yourself afraid to see?_

Another series of questions and she hadn’t opened her eyes once. She didn’t need to see the keys, it was as automatic as breathing to her, a second nature that she had recalled from her childhood and found that her talent was still ever present and just as powerful.

_What if all the world's inside of your head?_

_Just_ _creations of your own_

_Your devils and your gods all the living and the dead_

_And you really oughta know_

_You can live in this illusion_

_You can choose to believe_

_You keep looking but you can't find the ones_

_Are you hiding in the trees?_

The piercing sound of the piano against the silent backdrop of the room rattled and seared in his mind as she hit the final note and opened her eyes. He studied the side of her face, her eyes were glassy and as they swept over the black and white beneath her fingers he noticed how reluctant she was look up. It was as if she had settled into the world she had created with her lyrics and had decided to stay there. He took hold of her hand and brought it to his lips, leaving a kiss on her skin and keeping it close to his face.

“You just made that up? Right here?” He queried.

“A poem.” She whispered. “It was a poem I wrote at the start of the turn. I think I prefer it as a song.”

He lowered her hand to his lap but kept a firm hold of it. Finally, her eyes crept up to his and he could detect the self-consciousness in them.

“Was somethin’ else, Lex.” He told her.

She looked down into her lap and slowly licked her lips. She had shown Daryl more about herself than she had ever shown anyone and she had only known him a matter of months. He had proved to her that it was the right choice to share the things she considered to be close to her heart and extremely personal. They were things that made up part of who she was, part of her personality. Daryl thought she was passionate, creative, talented and imaginative. She breathed new life into a world inside his head that had become stark and desolate. She had created colour and allowed growth and progress and she had no idea of the effect she had on him. He wanted to tell her all of it, wished she could see what he saw when he looked at her, but he had never been great at expressing how he felt.

“Thank you” She said into her lap. “Hope it was worth all the work you put into earning it”

“Wasn’t no chore” He smirked, hiding behind his hair.

She laughed quietly from beside him as he continued to clutch her hand.

“Ever wanna sing to me again I aint gonna stop ya. But not don’t stop believin’, can’t stand that damn song” He smiled.

She squeezed his hand and for the first time in her life, she was exposed, she was vulnerable and her heart was at the mercy of someone else. Someone that was treating it like the rarest of things and was already nudging his way inside and she hoped with every inch of her being that he would not destroy it.

_Careful, you’re getting deeper and deeper into this._

 *****

The drive back had been enjoyable, the sun was warm and so was her mood as she casually reclined in the driver’s seat with one hand draped over the wheel. That was one perk of driving in the apocalypse, the rules of the road no longer existed, she could drive in whatever lane she wanted, swerve all over the road and park anywhere without repercussions. Now, with her hair blowing around her face under the watchful scrutiny of Daryl from her side, she grinned widely to herself and glanced over at him. He was smiling back at her as she swayed with the truck’s movement.

She turned the truck into the street that led to Alexandria, overhanging trees and abandoned vehicles obscuring the view of the high walls and gate at the end. Daryl grabbed the inside of the door when she suddenly swerved to the side of the road, the trucks wheels screeched and they both shot forwards when she hit the brakes.

“What is it? What’s wrong?” He demanded.

She turned to him and took hold of a fistful of the front of his shirt, dragging him closer to her. She firmly planted her lips on his, shocking him initially before he relaxed and his hand instinctively found the back of her head, burrowing into her hair and holding her to him. She tried to break the kiss, to sit back but he wouldn’t let her and she gave in, going back to him and embarking on a passionate and lustful kiss that made certain parts of her body flutter. Hearing the subtle rumble of a growl in his throat, she told herself that she had to pull away or she would drag him into the backseat and resign herself to the fact that her first time with him would be in the backseat of a truck at the side of the road. She gently squeezed his forearm, signalling for him to release her. Her lips left his and she admired his hazy and dizzied face from her close vicinity, never wanting to forget his blue eyes and short, scruffy beard, how the world had weathered him since she’d first seen him at her father’s gun store but how she still thought he was ridiculously handsome.

“Now, I ain’t complainin’” He panted “But what was that for?”

She pushed her face into the crook of his neck, nudging at him with her nose and he closed his arm around her back.

“Because like me, you’re a private person. So, when we go through those gates I will have to wait until I’m alone with you before I can kiss you again.”

Her arms journeyed around his waist and he couldn’t wrap his head around the fact that she liked him so much, she had stopped the truck in order to be able to kiss him and touch him one last time before they went back to pretending nothing was happening between them. The notion confused and astonished him and he remembered feeling like this only once before, when Faith had told him she liked him as more than a friend. It had made him feel like someone had picked him up and dropped him in a parallel universe, and it felt exactly the same the second time around with Lexie.

“You gonna miss it that much, huh?” He teased

“Nah, don’t be stupid. You just occupy me when I’m bored” she shot back.

“Asshole.” He huffed. Receiving a jovial laugh in return. 

 Lexie climbed back over to the driver’s seat and pulled the truck back to the middle of the lane and carried on to Alexandria. Shooting him a flirtatious wink as they rolled through the gate.

 *****

After dropping the truck off and handing the keys to Denna, Lexie had managed to avoid a firing round of questions from her by claiming she was starving and needed to get some sleep. Daryl had given everyone the impression that he had taken her out on a recruiting run with him and warily enlisted Aaron to help reinforce the lie. Awake that he was a bad liar, he simply had to explain that if they saw any people while they were out, they would track them, thus it not being a entire untruth after all. People waved politely at Lexie as she passed along the street with Daryl by her side. People she had known of since her arrival but no one that she could name or could say that she’d had any semblance of a conversation with, much to her delight. Upon reaching the end of the path to her house, she turned to him.

“Thank you, Daryl. This has been…wonderful.” She informed him.

“Anytime.” He uttered in response.

She cleared her throat and stepped closer, her vision cast over the floor so it was harder for any passers by to read her lips. “I’ll miss sharing a bed with you.”

She heard a breathy huff and saw his boots readjust their position on the sidewalk.

“Same.” He mumbled.

She beamed to herself and pulled her backpack off, rummaging around inside and eventually revealing a sketch pad. She looked up at his curious expression and held out the pad.

“You haven’t seen this one. It’s portraits of family members and people I used to know. Their names and who they are to me are on the back of each one. Thought you might want to look through it.”

He took the pad without a second’s hesitation and tucked it under his arm.

“I do. Thanks.” He said.

“I’ll see you around.” She smiled as she began to walk away.

“Later, Sunshine.” He shot at her, holding eye contact until she absolutely had to turn her attention to the steps of the front porch.

 *****

The house was still and serene but Lexie could see that it looked like a hurricane had blown through it after Mel had spent the best part of a week marking her territory with various personal items. Lexie dumped her bags in the hall and thudded along the wooden hallway floor to the living room where she found Mel stood by the window with her mouth wide open.

“What the hell was that I just saw?!” She exclaimed.

Lexie sighed and rolled her eyes, slumping down into an armchair and throwing her head back onto the cushion.

“Oh, hi Mel, I had a great time, thank you. How are you?” She chirped sarcastically.

Mel shot across the room to her and sat on the coffee table in front of Lexie, grabbing her knees with both hands and leaning towards her.

“You have to tell me what happened over the last few days I have been DYING of anticipation and did I just see what I thought I saw? You gave him your sketch pad?!” She rambled.

“Yes. I let him see some of my work. He took me on vacation, Mel. To a place he knew I’d love.” Lexie reasoned.

“I let you borrow my clothes and I slapped the guy that offered you four hundred dollars to sleep with him. That qualifies me for a peek or two!” She announced.

Lexie levelled her gaze at her sister and raised one eyebrow.

“You’ve peeked anyway you fucking liar.”

“Alright alright.” Mel groaned, waving a hand around in the air. “They are incredible though.”

“Thank you.” Lexie smiled.

Mel sat on the arm of the chair and threw an arm around Lexie’s shoulders.

“So, what happened?” She asked.

Lexie reddened and pushed her lips together.

“Oh my god, something happened!” Mel shrieked, grabbing Lexie’s shoulders and shaking them.

“Mel, please. This is mine. My memories to keep.” She replied, shrugging her off.

“Of course it’s yours! You got to experience it instead of hearing it second hand! C’mon, just give me something. Please, you listened to me harp on every single time I met a new guy. I want to hear it from you now…because yours is genuine, Lex and I have never been able to do this with you before.” She explained, slipping off the arm of the chair and resuming her place on the coffee table. Lexie had to admit she was right, Mel had never had the chance to chat excitedly about such a topic with Lexie before and she knew that she had longed for it for years. For the girly gossiping sessions she always had with her friends, but that were forced upon Lexie while she listened politely and offered advice where she could. Mel had only ever wanted to see her happy and she understood that right now, it seemed like it had finally happened.

“I kissed him.” Lexie gave up.

“YES!” Mel threw her arms in the air like a cheerleader and giggled happily “That’s my girl! How was it?”

“Amazing.” Lexie smiled bashfully. “He’s amazing.”

“Ooohh I am so jealous and I’m so happy I think I might cry. Oh god, I _am_ crying.” Mel sniffed dramatically, dabbing at the corner of her eyes with her fingers.

“We got to know each other. Without anyone’s interference and we’re really into each other.” Lexie confessed, biting her thumbnail. “That’s it. That’s all I’m giving you. And thanks a bunch for the transparent nightwear, you bitch.” She shot at her.  

“Ha! You may have hated it but I betcha he didn’t!” Mel laughed.

 *****

Her room was exactly as she’d left it and Poe was sat outside the window, awaiting her return. After letting him in, she laughed as he immediately hopped onto her bed and began chirping at her. She rubbed his head briefly, silencing him and began to unpack her bag and crate of supplies. Re-arranging her shelves and drawers to accommodate her new items had given her food for thought. Did she really want to leaver Alexandria anymore? Daryl had given her a reason to stay and the concept of her living away from everyone outside the walls now had the complete opposite effect than it did before she had met Daryl. Her relationships with Mel and Aaron had been even more solidified due to her need for encouragement and advice when it came to affairs of the heart and as a result, she felt closer to them than ever. She couldn’t deny that the thought of living in the Artists house full time was an appealing one and one that would play on her mind from then on.

 *****

In his room, Daryl threw his bag into a chair by the window and sat on the edge of the bed with Lexie’s sketchbook in his hands. The tatty, brown cover of the leather-bound book was well loved and wearing away at the edges, but Daryl considered this to be a sign that it held a large amount of sentimentality. For her to let him borrow something so close to her heart meant a lot to him, even if he was unable to express it to her.

Opening the cover, he flicked through a few of the images, seeing examples of the names and quotes she had told him about. He couldn’t believe how much like a black and white photograph album it looked. The drawings were all so realistic, they wouldn’t have looked out of place at a photography exhibition.

His stomach grumbled angrily before he had a chance to properly look at any of them and she set the book down and headed to the stairs.

At the bottom of the staircase, he could hear quiet conversation and he wandered into the kitchen to find Rick and Carol staring at him from the island in the middle. They were sat on either side with smug looks on their faces. Carol in a floral blouse and Rick in his sheriffs uniform. Nudging his head up in a greeting, he went straight to the cupboards, foraging for food. He checked cupboards and boxes on the counter, making a terrible racket as he worked but Carol didn’t say a word, which suddenly struck him as odd after he’d had to get used to her homemaking and rule setting ways when they’d moved in. Digging around in a wooden box from the pantry, he looked up in the curious silence to find them both looking at him. Carol finding it difficult to hide her grin behind her coffee cup in front of her face.

“What?” Daryl snapped.

“Good trip?” Rick asked after shooting Carol a grin.

“Yeah. Was fine.”

“Find any people?” Rick pressed. Carol reached across the countertop and swatted at his hand.

Daryl remembered that he had been forced to make out that his trip with Lexie was a recruiting run so as not to rouse suspicion. Rick and Carol had clearly figured out what was going on and Rick was delighting in tormenting him.

“Naw. Trail went cold.” He muttered while ripping open a packet of beef jerky he had found in the bottom of the box and messily stuffing some into his mouth.

“Oh, right, right. So, what were you doing out there for so long?” He questioned.

“Rick. Stop it” Carol said with a hint of sympathy for Daryl in her voice

“You got somethin’ ya wanna ask me, man?” Daryl snapped, calling Ricks bluff “C’mon, let’s have it.”

Rick held his hands up in surrender, a wide smile on his face as he chucked and rose from his seat.

“No, he doesn’t have anything he wants to ask you. He’s just leaving. Aren’t you, Rick?” Carol urged.

“Maybe I’ll go ask Lexie.” Rick laughed, now at the door.

“Fine! Go ask her! See if I care!” Daryl spat with a mouth full of beef jerky. He chewed wildly, his table manners scarce.

Once Rick was out of earshot, Carol motioned for Daryl to take a seat opposite her which he did, still ravenously demolishing what was in the packet in his hand.

“So, I spoke to Mel a couple days ago.” She told him with a glint in her eye.

Now he suddenly stopped chewing and noted the knowing smile on her face, his whole body stilled.

“She told me you took Lexie away to a farmhouse in the middle of nowhere. Asked her to cover the armory for a week.”

“Girl can’t hold her own damn water.” He grumbled. Irritation prickled his back when he cast his mind back and specifically remembered asking Mel to cover Lexie’s shifts and making her promise not to tell anyone anything other than he was recruiting and taking Lexie with him. She had lasted all of two days before she confessed to Carol.

 _At least it was only Carol_ he thought.

“Lexie said she wanted to get away for a while n’ I’m about as useless as tits on a bull with this damn stab wound so I figured it made sense to go on a kind of… vacation.”

Carol beamed at him and tilted her head to one side. She watched him while he resumed chewing, seeing him swallow hard and screw the packet up in his hand. He threw it down on the table and swiped his mouth with the back of his wrist as he eyed up half a mug of coffee that Rick had left.

“You kissed her yet?” Carol asked.

She had always been a ‘want to know, just ask’ kind of person when it came to Daryl. She trusted that he would give her as straight an answer as he could and that was a lot more than he would do with anyone else. He grabbed the mug and downed the cold coffee. Placing it back on the surface, he spun it around between his thumb and forefingers.

“She kissed me” he uttered. She searched his features for any sign of shyness or a hint of a smile but saw nothing.

“And are you happy about that?” She questioned.

There it was. The faint, blink and you’d miss it smile she had been searching for. He nodded, and the corner of his mouth lifted

“Yeah.” He admitted.

“I’m very proud of you.” She told him.

“What? Why?”

“I know you’ve felt torn over this and you’re not the best with situations based on emotions…”

He shot her a confused look.

“…don’t deny it, you and I both know you’re not. But if you’re listening to your heart, you’re doing the right thing.”

“I dunno what you’re talkin’ ‘bout. But alright.”

Carol playfully slapped the back of his hand.

“Anything else you want to tell me about your vacation?” She urged.

He thought for a moment and shrugged noncommittally.

“Didn’t do much else.”

Carols eyes bulged and she clamped a hand over her mouth in surprise. Daryl, who obviously hadn’t realised what he’d said and how it sounded, was busy picking beef jerky from his teeth.

“Daryl.”

“What?”

“You do know that you just made it sound like you spent the whole time kissing her.”

“Oh. Uh…”

An amused exhalation escaped his lungs and he ran a hand over his chin.

“Stop it” He smirked. “I’m done with this conversation.”

He couldn’t deny it even if he wanted to without telling a bare faced lie. He hadn’t realised until his conversation with Carol that he had, in fact, spent the entire time in some kind of compromising, yet deliciously addictive situation with Lexie.

 _Not a bad vacation._ He thought.

 *****

Hopping down the steps from Deanna’s place, Lexie turned abruptly and walked to the gate. She had been given permission to swap out a guard shift with Maggie, having explained to Deanna that she was restless and bored and needed to do something useful while also allowing Maggie to go and get some rest. Deanna had given in to Lexie’s demand, knowing that even if she said no, she would get her own way in the end where Maggie was concerned. Lexie’s mind was full of nothing but indulgent memories of her time with Daryl outside the walls for the past few days and she longed to see him, but was desperately trying to ‘play it cool’ as Mel put it.

Reaching the gate, she informed Maggie that she would be stepping in to cover her and to her surprise, Maggie had not objected. She thanked her sincerely with a gentle shoulder squeeze and made tracks to her house, leaving Lexie with Abraham, who had proved not only to be a great distraction due to his sense of humour, he was also a firearms enthusiast with military experience. He and Lexie chatted on an off for an hour before she suggested a perimeter check and asked if he had any objections to her going alone. He had furrowed his brow and thought her strange for a moment until he finally shrugged and agreed.

The perimeter wall had a small walkway around it that passed behind everyone’s houses and was generally one of the darkest parts of Alexandria after sundown. Lanterns lit the way intermittently but the use of a flashlight was always recommended. Lexie, never being one to go with the grain, actually liked to amble along in the dark and silence. As she passed her house humming a quiet tune to herself, a hand shot out from the darkness and grabbed her wrist. Her heart began to hammer instantly and adrenaline crashed through her body. She whirled around to see a quick glimpse of Daryl and her mind quelled its panic. He bundled her against the wall, her back hitting the surface with a thud which almost knocked the air from her lungs and before she could even make a sound, her rifle was dropping to the floor and his lips were on hers.

 

Carl blearily staggered around the dark kitchen and ended up at the sink. He grabbed a glass from the drainer and began filling it with water. He took a long drink, throwing his head back and closing his eyes. It was the middle of the night and he had crept downstairs in search of liquids to soothe his dry throat. When he opened his eyes, he spotted movement in the space between the two houses. A moving shadow.

_What is that?_

Then, he saw them.

_Is that? No…it’s not. It is…that’s…Daryl and Lexie._

Daryl was kissing Lexie against the wall and Carl could see everything from the blackened room he stood in. He blinked in disbelief and leaned over the sink, closer to the window in confusion and shock. At first, he thought he was maybe dreaming, or hallucinating. Daryl had been very much a lone wolf since Faith’s death and although Carl had seen him look at a bottle of Jack Daniels like he’d won the lottery one day, he had never seen him show the slightest bit of interest in anything or anyone apart from surviving.

 

Daryl broke away from her after hearing her moan happily to herself in the middle of their kiss. A quiet satisfaction swept over him and for a fleeting moment, he actually thought he had this spontaneous romance thing down, at least for now. He traced a line down the side of her face as she looked up at him with the same sparkle in her eyes that she always had when she was happy. He brushed over her bottom lip with his thumb and she clung onto the front of his leather vest, with a powerful need.

“Hey.” He whispered.

“Hi.” She grinned.

 

Carl’s saw the exchanged looks; the dreamy eyed smile on Lexie’s face and every move Daryl made and was instantly aware of the connection they seemed to have. Whatever was going on between them, was quite clearly mutual. He watched as Lexie smiled up at Daryl while he caressed her face as if she were made of a fragile porcelain. He wasn’t stepping back or increasing the distance between them, staying still with her clutched in his arms with his head bowed. Carl smiled knowingly to himself and finished up his drink. Placing the glass in the sink and leaving Lexie and Daryl to it.

 

Lexie stretched her index finger out so she could feel the v-shaped, exposed area of his chest above his shirt, tickling over it and licking her lips as her eyes quickly stole a glance downwards. Daryl was just happy being so close to her with one arm around her waist and the other hand brushing through her hair. He positioned his lips against her forehead and planted a soft kiss on her skin.

“Supposed to be checking the perimeter.” She mumbled quietly in a daze.

“One more minute.” He told her, closing his eyes.

She leaned into him, lightly kissing his chest and snuggling against him. His whole body seemed to be set alight when her lips touched the middle of his chest. She hadn’t kissed him there before and his legs almost buckled under him. In the crisp, cold air Lexie found that his body heat was as addictive as the sensation of being pressed against him. She could smell cigarette smoke on his clothes combined with the leathery tang from his vest. Smells she would have normally disliked, but this was Daryl and she was sure she was becoming enamoured with everything about him.

She was soft, her hair was soft, her skin was soft, when she spoke, her voice was soft. When everything around him was so harsh, so jagged and dangerous and brutal, Lexie had become his haven, his sanctuary from it all and holding her was like a calming, sensory explosion that he was reluctant to let go of.

“I have to go” she breathed into the cocoon she had buried herself in against his chest.

“I know” he sighed, loosening his grip on her. She dropped her arms and stepped back, picking up her rifle from the floor. Daryl shoved his hands in his pockets and dipped his head, catching her eye though his hair.

“We going to do this every time I circle back tonight?” She asked.

“Mighta crossed my mind once or twice.” He admitted.

“We shouldn’t. Someone might see us.” She reasoned.

“Mm. spose ya right.” He admitted.

She slung her gun over her shoulder and stepped around him to go back to the perimeter pathway. He caught her hand as she passed and gently kissed the side of her face for a moment. She chuckled nervously and turned her head away as she moved back, not wanting him to see her reddened cheeks in what little light there was from the single, dim lantern that was attached to the fence.

“You need to let me go.” She uttered.

“Alright. See ya tomorrow, Sunshine.” He rasped before strolling along the gap between the houses towards the front porch of what was now his home. His angel wings subtly swaying from side to side as he walked.

  

He sat down on the Porch and lit a smoke, able to see Lexie briefly for a few fleeting seconds as she passed the small alleys that separated the buildings and then when she returned to Abraham at the gate. It was a fair distance away but it still provided him with something to look at while he smiled with his feet up on the table. It had been a risky move and completely out of character for him, but it had paid off and he’d had his fix of her but he estimated that he wouldn’t be able to stay away from her for long.

The door clicked open and Daryl shot up, withdrawing his boots from the surface for a second and replacing them when he saw that it was only Carl and not Carol, who would have slapped him for using the table as a footrest again. Carl slipped out of the house and closed the door quietly behind him. He sank into the seat next to Daryl.

“Hey, kid.” Daryl said before taking a long drag on his cigarette and leaning away from Carl to exhale. “You should be sleepin’.”

“So should you.” Carl replied.

“Yeah, don’t do much of that. Never have.” Daryl told him. He tapped his cigarette and ash flittered down into a spiral, creating a peppery, grey pile on the decking between them.

“I couldn’t sleep. Came downstairs to get some water. I saw you from the kitchen window.” Carl informed him.

Daryl’s eyes shot up but he wasn’t able to focus on anything other than the tired rail of the fence in front of him. Dread seeped into his veins and he tightened his jaw.

“Oh, Yeah? What’d ya see?” He questioned, not being able to bring himself to look at him.

“You kissing Lexie.” Carl said casually as he played with the hem of his T-shirt.

Daryl cleared his throat and fidgeted in his seat. He raised a hand and rubbed his eyes with his index finger and thumb as he took a deep breath and released it in a dramatic and exasperated wave. Sucking in one last drag of his smoke, he angrily flicked it it onto the grass over the fence.

“Shit.” He cursed under his breath.

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone.” Carl assured him, a hint of a smile tugging on his lips. He was finding the whole thing somewhat amusing and couldn’t deny he enjoyed having some knowledge, some power over the most protective and courageous member of their group aside from his father.

Daryl side glanced at him, seeing his amusement and the two made eye contact for a moment, Carl’s small smile eventually influencing Daryl to do the same. The two of them smirked at one another and Daryl shook his head.

“Ahh man, I’m a tracker, meant to have all this sneakin’ around stuff down.” He complained.

“Just remember to look over your shoulder in future.” Carl suggested lightheartedly.

Daryl chucked briefly and lifted his eyes to see Lexie laughing at something with Abraham. Even from his distance away he could still see the light in her when she laughed, it was all around her. Carl and Daryl had discovered a new-found respect for one another after Carl had lost his mother and gained a baby sister all at the same time before they had got to Alexandria. Daryl had picked up on his grief and had offered him his own story of losing his mother and since then, their bond had become somewhat of a laid-back, brotherly relationship. The kind that Daryl never had, even with his real Brother.

“Thought you guys were just friends.” Carl stated.

“Yeah. We were.” Daryl replied “Just kinda happened.”

“But you liked her all along, right?” Carl continued.

Daryl looked to the side at him, his brow furrowed, bafflement crossing his features.

“I ain’t talkin’ ‘bout this with you. Ain’t none of ya business.” He scoffed.

“I know. I just…” Carl started as he slumped back in the seat, his face falling into an expression of frustration. “Look, there’s this girl-“

“-Dude. Im’ma stop ya there. Ya askin’ the wrong guy.” Daryl interrupted.

“Am I? Because I just saw you kissing a really pretty woman and when I first met you, you were with Faith and she was really pretty too.”

Daryl stared at him, he’d certainly considered himself lucky to be involved with both Faith and Lexie but had never considered what it looked like to the outside observer. It looked very much like he’d done extremely well for himself. But when he thought back, it hadn’t been the case that he had expertly wooed both women, quite the contrary. He had been nervous and clueless and just seemed to go along with whatever happened. He didn’t know if Lexie and Faith would have seen it any differently, with the rare, romantic gestures he had made being received well, or if they would simply say that they had taken the lead.

“Just been lucky.” He confessed. “Who’s the girl?”

“Enid.” Carl mumbled.

“Yeah, I know her. She’s quiet.”

“Yeah, like Lexie is.”

Daryl sighed again, Carl wasn’t going anywhere without at least an idea and Daryl sat wishing he knew what to say to be able to offer some semblance of advice, but the truth was, he hadn’t actively sought out the outcome he’d got with Lexie. He had merely spent time with her and it had transpired somehow after both of them being as clueless as each other.

“She talk to ya?” Daryl asked.

“Yeah, when we’re on our own.”

“That’s a good thing. Means she probably trusts ya if she aint like that with nobody else.”

Carl nodded in agreement. “Lexie talks to you?”

“All the time.”

“I don’t know if she likes me like that” Carl groaned. “How did you know Lexie liked you?”

Daryl shrugged. He didn’t know. Lexie had made it clear that she enjoyed his company having never asked him to leave the perch or her room and seemed to care little about him imposing on her late-night ventures to the abandoned store. But that alone wasn’t enough for him to be assured that her opinion of him was romantically inclined.

“I didn’t.” He grunted “look, I ain’t no expert on women. I mean, the porch lights on, but ain’t nobody home. We were just getting’ close, seein’ each other all the time. I guess I wanted to know so I just asked.”

“I can’t do that.” Carl dismissed.

“Why?”

“What If she says no?”

“Then she says no. Ya wanna sit around wonderin’ all the damn time? Just ask her. Yeah, it's scary as hell but don’t be a pus-“ Daryl trailed off, figuring that cussing at the kid probably wasn’t a wise idea. He’d been brought up differently and Rick wouldn’t thank him for it. “Maybe you should be talkin’ to ya ol’ man about this.”

“I wanna talk to you. Besides, if you want me to keep what I saw to myself, you kind of owe me.” Carl concluded.

Daryl’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Ah hell naw are you tryin’ to blackmail me, kid!”

Carl laughed loudly from under his thick layer of brown hair.

“You got some sack on you.” Daryl scoffed.

“I’m kidding” Carl grinned. “Why are you guys keeping it a secret?”

There were a lot of reasons. Pressure from those around them to progress things quicker, their respective past experiences or not so, in Lexie’s case. Then there was the fact that they were still getting to know one another and there was still a chance that things might not work out.

“‘Cause there ain’t no rush. Less folks interfering, the better.”

Carl nodded for a second time and flicked his head to the side, clearing his vision of his hair.

“It’s good. Judith likes Lexie.” He mentioned “so do I.”

Daryl glanced at him again and smiled thinly

“Good.”

Carl got to his feet and went to unlatch the door.

“Carl” Daryl called out. Carl looked over his shoulder in the darkness of the corner of the porch. “Just ask her, man.” He pressed.

“I’ll try. Thanks.” He mumbled as he wandered into the house.

Daryl considered that it was the first time he had ever been asked for advice regarding women and he wondered if Carl had temporarily lost his mind or was playing some kind of elaborate prank on him. But the kid had seemed genuine enough and he was able to sense the apprehension in his voice when he talked about Enid and he could only hope that when he did finally ask her, that she would say yes. Just like Lexie did.

 *****

Upon returning to his room and giving up the idea of another stolen kiss with Lexie, Daryl sat back on his bed and picked up her sketch pad again. He wasn’t surprised to see another drawing of Mel, this time looking into a full length mirror lined with bulbs like the backstage make up area of a show. She was applying lipstick, her lips pursed and her hair pinned up in a perfectly arranged bun. She wore a fitted pencil dress and heels with ankle straps. The particulars of the image left Daryl curious about where she was going and he could only assume it was one of the things Lexie was trying to convey with the decisions she’d made about the piece. On the back of the page, was text written in Lexie’s unique handwriting.

'Melissa. My adoptive Sister. The finishing touches before a date.'  

" _I wish I was as striking as you. I’d sell my own mother for your cheekbones. Actually, I wouldn’t, because daddy would shoot me.” – Mel_

 Daryl smiled at the quote and how typical it was of something Mel would say. He figured she hadn’t changed much over the years. Turning to the next image, he saw a man he recognised to be Lexie’s adoptive Father. The man that had sold him a huge pile of guns at the start of the turn. He stood behind the counter of the store that Daryl remembered well, his hands flat on the counters surface. He was peering pensively out of the window, light from the street outside illuminating his rotund and kind face. His worn waistcoat boasted the gun stores logo and behind him, on the top of the registers screen, was a photo of two little girls that Daryl knew were Lexie and Mel. He was impressed by the quote on the back, raising an eyebrow in agreement and nodding as he read it.

'George. My adoptive Father. Two minutes after I told him a man at the shooting range told me I was ‘just lucky’ with my shots.'

_“Some will say your near perfect aim is a trick, a fluke because you’re a woman. Let them think what they like. Just remember, you’re a marksman, Lexie. What they say is bullshit. Total bullshit.” – My dad._

Similarly, Lexie’s depiction of her adoptive mother was another solitary and powerful portrait. She sat in a large wicker chair in the corner of a room, a blanket draped over her legs. Her shoulder length, curled hair was fresh from the 50’s in Victory rolls that had been perfectly made. She wore a floral shirt and her hands were rested in her lap, a school yearbook clutched in one of them.

'Violet. My adoptive mother. After finding my yearbook hidden under my bed. I was too scared to show her because of how different I looked to everyone else.'

_“Lexie, it is exhausting trying to keep up with everybody else. Be you. It’s a lot less tiring and those that want to be there, will walk right into your life when you least expect it. You are a queen. The queen of clubs.” – My mom._

So far, Daryl was even more astounded by the talent and massive part of her soul she had poured into each sketch. It was late and he was tired, but he wanted to see more. He flipped the page to see another familiar face. Stevie. He was sat on the end of a single bed, surrounded by posters of metal bands on the walls. She had captured every single detail of each poster as well as the image of Stevie himself. He looked solemn and wore only some low, baggy jeans with a chain attached to his belt. He was shirtless and his thin arms were covered in large, tribal tattoos. His long black hair was tousled, greasy and had been dragged over to one side, revealing fully the side of his face and his many ear piercings. Between his fingers, he held a joint with a thin line of smoke expelling from the tip. Daryl remembered him well, he played pool with him at the bar, bet with him on various things and enjoyed winding up Debbie, the bars owner until she was red in the face. Lexie’s version of him spoke volumes. She must have known how mixed up and broken he was, because she’d drawn him that way. Troubled, reliant on illegal substances to get by and with a certain nothingness about him. She must have been sat right beside him to have achieved such a picture. He turned the page and flipped the pad over to read what she had written on the back.

'Stevie. I broke his heart. A love confession during a Thursday night haze.'

“ _I don’t think I know how to love anything or anyone. But I do know I’m in love with you.”- Stevie_

Daryl blinked in surprise. So, it had been more than a one-night thing, at least to Stevie. Not that it mattered to him. He was more taken aback by the fact that she’d wanted to capture what was seemingly the exact moment he had confessed something so personal to her. Then, he remembered what she’d told him when he’d first seen her drawing and asked why she had chosen something damaged to draw. She had told him that there was a beauty in damaged things. In his portrait, Stevie looked damaged. She had never said anything about having feelings for him and so he concluded that whatever happened between Lexie and the guy he used to know from the Motorcycle club, it was all one-sided.

The last drawing he uncovered was of a man in a crumpled suit, standing in the rain on a sidewalk, he was angry, shouting in fact, at someone out of the frame. Daryl’s heart began to thud violently in his chest, his throat dried up and he started to shake his head as his eyes scanned over the image. He couldn’t believe his eyes. Flashbacks of the past flickered through his mind like images on a projector screen. He quickly turned the page over to read what was written on the back. This one hit him like a punch in the gut.

'Harry Wilson. My real Father. Shouting in the rain'.

_"Take her away, Janine. Take her away. I don’t want her. I already have a daughter.” – Harry._


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Having to post from my phone so please excuse any errors.
> 
> Hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas!
> 
> Thank you for the comments! <3

Harry Wilson.

Daryl switched between the front and back of the page. From Harry’s face, to the words written on the back. Over and over. It couldn’t be true. It was too coincidental, surely? He and Lexie were from the same town, Faith from the next town over. Lexie and Faith were around the same age. Lexie knew her father had another daughter. His eyes scanned over the words once more. He definitely read it right, didn’t he?

Harry Wilson.

Yes, it was right. How many Harry Wilson’s were there out there that had left Georgia to become a New York Lawyer who had a daughter in her 30’s? It could be a guy with the same name. But then there was the drawing. It was him alright. The unmistakeable slicked back hair, like the Fonz from Happy Days. That hadn’t changed when Daryl had first met him, except it was greyer. His build was stocky and he had the same shaped nose as Faith. Yes, it was him.

Harry Wilson.

Daryl slammed the sketchpad shut and left it on the bed next to him.

“Shit” He hissed to himself, bringing his knees up and rubbing his face with both hands, his elbows propped up on his bent legs. “Shit.”

His mind was bustling. A loud chorus of too many, complicated thoughts. He didn’t know how Lexie would take the news should he decide to tell her about his discovery. He didn’t even know how he felt about it. Faith had been his first and only love and out of all the people he could have moved on with after her death, he had somehow found her long lost half-sister that she didn’t even know existed. Then, there was how similar they were. Faith had always maintained that her mother had been a beautiful woman but with a heart sculpted from ice and Daryl thought she looked more like her mother than her father. But somehow Faith and Lexie had both turned out with the same hair and eye colour, the same high cheekbones and the same lightly freckled noses. They were the same height and although Lexie was more toned and athletic due to her activities before the turn, they also had roughly the same body shape. They looked so alike that Daryl had been stunned when he first saw Lexie and the moment had burned its self into his memory as the day that he saw Faith’s double.

 

*****

 

Mel and Aaron were stood outside of the armoury in the sunshine. Daryl approached with a ripped backpack on his shoulder while they chatted animatedly. He had barely slept, every time he closed his eyes he became restless and could only think of Faith and how if she were still around, she would have wanted Lexie to know the truth. Mel did a double take when she spotted Daryl charging towards them, his face stony and determined. Aaron also looked at him, stepping to one side to get a better view. They both stopped talking and Mel prepared herself for another telling off from Daryl, even thought she was quite sure she hadn’t done anything wrong this time.  He stopped in front of them and quickly glanced around their surroundings, ensuring he couldn’t be overheard. His hand held firmly onto the strap of the bag on his shoulder.

“You guys got a minute?” He asked.

“Yeah, of course.” Aaron responded.

Mel breathed a sigh of relief, despite his troubled expression, Daryl wasn’t there to yell at her after all.

“Away from the road?” Daryl requested.  

“Let’s go downstairs. We can keep an eye out for anyone coming in” Mel suggested before the three of them descended the stirs into the dim and cool, underground armoury.

 

Mel sat at the desk while Aaron stood behind her, the both of them baffled as to what Daryl could possibly have to say and so privately. Mel began to fret that it was something to do with Lexie. Every terrible situation she could think of forced its way into her mind and she fiddled nervously with a pen on the desk, twirling it around between her fingers. She almost darted up from her seat when Daryl pulled Lexie’s sketchpad out from his bag. Lexie hated the idea of anyone seeing her work and if Daryl was about to broadcast it to her and Aaron, she was going to have to try and stop him. He slapped the pad on the desk in front of her, making her jump slightly.

“Alright. Um…” He sighed. “Lexie let me borrow this. Inside are drawings of people she knows. Her family, people that have meant somethin’ to her.” he explained. “Last night, I was lookin’ though it and…and I found somethin’.”

Mel was now even more Panicked. What could he have possibly found that warranted this kind of action?  

Daryl opened the pad at the picture of the man in the rain and jabbed a finger at it.

“This guy right here. You know who he is?” He asked Mel.

She slowly shook her head, her eyebrows knitted together. She didn’t recognise the man at all, but felt like she probably should, judging from Daryl’s tone of voice. More than anything, she was astounded by the artistic talent her sister had and she couldn’t help but feel a wave of pride as she studied the picture. Aaron wore the exact same expression of puzzlement as he slowly stroked his chin. The impressively realistic image was so striking that he had to blink a few times to see that it wasn’t a photograph.

“No. I don’t think I know him” Mel replied.

Daryl heaved in a deep breath and Aaron could see he was visibly uncomfortable. He stepped away from the desk for a moment, returning only once he had summoned up the courage to continue.

“This is Lexie’s real father…” Daryl told them. He backed up for a moment, taking a deep breath and rubbing a hand over his face. “… I knew him. From before”

“What?!” Aaron exclaimed “how?!”

Daryl locked eyes with Aaron before turning his attention to Mel, who was sat, mouth open and staring up at him.

“Before the turn, I got arrested.” He admitted.

“You were arrested?!” Mel suddenly cried “What for?!”

“A few times. Fightin’ mainly. This one time it was Meth Trafficking.” He confessed

“Meth trafficking?! Woah, buddy! You’re dating my sister and you’re a drug runner?!” Mel demanded.

“Mel.” Aaron intervened with a hand on her shoulder. “A little beside the point. Not to mention irrelevant now the dead eat the living. Carry on, Daryl.”

Mel frowned but accepted Aaron’s intervention.

“Yeah, um…so, I’m being questioned by the cops and this guy walks in. Says he’s my lawyer.”

“She did say her real father was a lawyer.” Mel whispered to Aaron, who only hushed her with a slight raise of his hand.

“But I knew him. I knew who he was ‘cause at the time, I had a uh- a girlfriend. Faith. She called him in form New York to try to stop them throwin’ my ass in jail. He was her ol’ man.” He told them.

Mel still looked confused, while Aaron was now rubbing his fingertips through his stubble over and over again in disbelief.

“Are you- are you saying that Lexie’s real dad, was also your girlfriend’s dad?” He asked.

Instead of answering him, Daryl glanced at Mel.

“Lexie ever tell you her real dad’s name?” He queried.

“Yeah. Harry Wilson.” She nodded.

Daryl flipped the page over and motioned to the writing. Aaron and Mel both peered down at the page, aghast at the sight.

 

'Harry Wilson. My real father. Shouting in the rain.'

_“Take her away, Janine. Take her away. I don’t want her. I already have a daughter.” – Harry._

Mel’s throat tightened and she felt pressure behind her eyes before they began to moisten.

“Janine was her mom’s name. Oh my god.” She croaked, her eyes filling with tears. “Is that what he said to her?! Is that what he fucking said?! Oh my god! Why didn’t she tell me?! Oh my god.”

Aaron placed a soothing arm on the middle of her back and she thought she could literally feel her heart snap into two, useless pieces for her sister who had carried this drawing, this memory around with her for her entire life and had never spoken of the actual words she had heard that day when she leaned out of the car window to see her mother begging her father for help.

“What a fucking coward.” She seethed.

Aaron looked up at Daryl who was now anxiously chewing on his thumbnail as he glanced back and forth between them, his eyes lingering on Mel longer, who was angrily wiping her wet eyes with her fingers.

“Daryl” Aaron said “Your girlfriend-“

“-ex girlfriend. She’s gone.” Daryl intercepted.

“-I’m sorry, late girlfriend. Faith, was it?”

Daryl nodded sadly.

“If you’re right about this, which it seems you are. Then she was Lexie’s half sister.” Aaron clarified.

Daryl began stalking about the room, head down and biting in his bottom lip. Mel continued to sniffle from her seat at the desk, her eyes glued to the quote in front of her.

“Yeah. She was.” Daryl confirmed. “She told me her mom had an affair and Harry threw ‘em both out. Faith was 12 at the time. She couldn’t have known that he had a kid with someone else before that. Lexie and Faith, they’re around the same age. Shit. This is… shit.” He rambled.

“We have to tell her.” Mel mumbled from her deep daydream, her cheeks wet with tears.

“What good would it do?” Aaron asked.

“Faith, she was a good person?” Mel asked Daryl with wide, bloodshot eyes.

“Hell yeah. She was awesome.” Daryl affirmed.

“You think she would have wanted to know Lexie? If she’d found out who she was.” She continued.

“Yeah. No doubt about it.” Daryl nodded. “S’why I’m here, think if she was still here Faith would want Lexie to know. I was just gonna tell her right away, but you guys know her better than me. Needed to make sure I was doin’ the right thing.”

“You are, Daryl.” Mel replied without hesitation. “Lex needs to know. She has spent so long coming to terms with the fact that she wasn’t wanted by her real parents, like she was convinced it was her fault or something. I think she would want to know that there was someone out there that was related to her and would have wanted to be in her life.” She explained.

Daryl flipped the page back over to reveal the image of Harry again. He had made his peace with Harry before the turn after starting off on the wrong foot and yelling at him in front of everyone at a gathering in Faiths back yard. Harry had put Faith down in a public display of disappointment and judgement at the new life she had created for herself after the death of her husband and Daryl had snapped and lost his temper. But he swallowed his pride since and had been grateful for his assistance in his legal matters. He made the effort for Faith, and Faith only.

“It might help her to have more information about her real dad, too. OK, the world is different now, but she deserves to know more about who she is and her biological family. I think I do actually agree with Mel.” Aaron offered.

Daryl felt confusion and rage rising in his chest and he slammed the pad shut, turning his back to them. Anger spiked through him. Anger that Harry had been so selfish and cowardly, anger that of all the men in the world, both of the women he cared about shared him as a father and anger about how complicated it could potentially make things for him and Lexie.

“Fuck!” He raged.

Mel suddenly got up from her seat and walked over to Daryl, who shied away from her when she approached, turning his body so she couldn’t see his face. She put her hand on his shoulder and pushed at it with the intention to get him to turn to her, he didn’t so she gave him no choice when she dipped her head and met his eye. Sliding her arm around his waist, she brought him in for a hug and after a couple of seconds of him standing rigid in her grasp, he loosened and rested his chin on her shoulder. Her hair smelt like fruit.

“You have to be the one to tell her. You knew Faith. But I’ll be there with you. We’ll both be there for her.” She whispered before stepping back. “Are you OK?” She asked him.

“I dunno.” He admitted. “I loved Faith. I would have died for her. Now, with Lexie… we’re real close and- and I like her. I care about her. But they’re fuckin’ sisters. They’re sisters. I just can’t- I can’t fuckin’ believe this.”

Aaron stepped closer to them.

“As long as you still feel that way about Lexie, nothing has to change. I am sure It’s not going to alter how she feels about you, man.” Aaron told him. “She talks to me, tells me a lot. She likes you as much as you seem to like her, I can assure you of that. I don’t think I should be there when you guys tell her. But she knows she can come to Eric and I anytime and she probably will.”  

Daryl noticed that Aaron was holding Lexie’s sketchpad out to him. He took it, stuffing it in his bag. He knew that Lexie hadn’t let on to anyone about her sometimes-fragile state of mind and her past experiences with self harm. Not wanting to give too much away of a story that wasn’t his to tell, he made sure to tread carefully.

“Alright” he sighed. “We tell her. But I gotta make sure she’s alright. That she’s safe. I know she gets kinda… low sometimes.”

Mel, who thought Lexie was very forthcoming with how she felt provided it stayed between them, wasn’t surprised to find that she had opened up to Daryl and had trusted him enough to be so honest. Although she didn’t know the extent of Lexie’s pervious anguish, she was pleased to find out that she had been talking about how she felt at all.

“We can do that. All of us.” Mel stated. “Come over just after dark. I’ll make sure she’s around and fed and in a half decent mood and we can sit down with no interruptions.”

Daryl nodded solemnly. “Alright.” He agreed.

 *****

Lexie wasn’t stupid, nor was she deaf. She had been able to tell that Mel had something on her mind all evening and she could hear her worried sighs sounding from the kitchen as she cooked. When she wasn’t offering a wide, obviously fake smile, she was using cooking dinner as an excuse not to be in the same room. She waited and waited, expecting a confession that never came. Maybe she’d ruined an item of clothing that wasn’t hers. Maybe she had divulged a secret of Lexie’s to someone. Maybe she’d slept with Spencer again. Maybe she’d flirted with Daryl, kissed Daryl, slept with Daryl. Her stomach flipped at the thought of the latter and she had to assure herself that Daryl was not interested in Mel, he had had also not had time to see her considering he had just spent most of the week kissing Lexie in a house in the middle of nowhere on a post-apocalyptic vacation. But there was something. Something she was hiding and time would eventually give it away. So, she played the game and sat quietly. They ate quickly and Mel’s attempts at chatter were met with polite replies. When Daryl turned up at the door unexpectedly, Lexie’s heart sank.

_What the hell is going on here?!_

“What are you doing here?” She asked Daryl from the couch.

Exchanging a nervous glance with Mel, he didn’t answer. Instead, he walked into the room and sat down beside her, taking hold of her hand while Mel sat in the chair opposite them. With his free hand, he tugged the sketchpad from his bag and placed it on the coffee table in front of her. He gave Mel a quick nod to signify that he was as ready as he was going to be.

“We have something we need to tell you.” Mel told her.

Lexie’s eyes rapidly pinged between them as she wracked her brain to think of a possible reason why. Her logical and intelligent mind was being put to the test as emotions started to cloud her judgement.

“You guys had sex, didn’t you?” She blurted out.

Daryl flinched beside her and he leaned back slightly, tilting his head at her. “What?! Naw!” he exclaimed

“Lexie!” Mel cried

“God damn” Daryl muttered under his breath, still outraged.

“Well, it can’t be worse than that. So, go for it.” Lexie shrugged.

Her comment instantly made Daryl feel even more confused. It spoke volumes about how she felt about him and he didn’t know if he’d ever get his head around the truth that she was so enamoured with him she considered the notion of him sleeping with her sister to be the worst possible thing they could tell her. Daryl knew beyond any doubt that he would never do any such thing with anyone else, let alone Mel but felt uneasy that she didn’t seem to know that.

He laced his fingers with hers, resting them on her leg and nodded to Mel again. She leaned forwards and opened the sketchpad to the picture of her father.  

“Lex, is this your real dad?” She asked gently.

Lexie visibly recoiled at the sight of one of her pieces of art laid open on the table for everyone to see. She felt a sting of anger at Daryl for allowing Mel to see it but tried to force it away and concentrate on the question.

“Yes. Why?”

“What was his name?” Mel pressed.

“Harry Wilson. You know his name” She said, her voice laced with suspicion.

“I know, I just need you to confirm it.” Mel told her.

“Why? What the hell is this?” Lexie demanded.

“Alright, im’ma just say it.” Daryl sighed as he looked at Mel for approval. Seeing her hold her hands up in surrender, he squeezed Lexie’s hand slightly and caught her eye.

“You and Faith, ya had the same father.” He stated plainly.

Her eyes danced back and forth, to Mel, to Daryl, to the picture. Daryl couldn’t read her and neither could Mel. Her face was blank, devoid of any clues as to how she was going to react.

Daryl started to wonder if she’d heard him correctly or if he should say something else when she finally spoke, her face breaking into a strange smile.

“I’m sorry, you’re going to have to run that one by me again. For a second there, I thought you said that Faith and I had the same father.” She laughed.

“Lex, Daryl met him, he knew him. The man in this picture, he’s Faith’s daddy.” Mel tried, her voice sympathetic but clear. “It says on the back, the quote says he had a daughter. You told me he had a daughter. It was Faith, Lex.”

She was completely still except for the noticeable increase in the depths of her breath and her nervously restless eyes.

“You had a half sister. A blood relative.” Mel added.

Lexie began to frantically shake her head, looking at both Daryl and Mel as if they were both insane. She tried to dislodge her hand from Daryl’s but he held on tight.

“What? How? No, that- that can’t be right.” She stammered.

Daryl felt the uncontrollable urge to provide her with more information to help her process what she was being told.

“Sounds like crazy talk, I know. But that guy in that picture you drew, that’s Faiths ol’ man. I know, because I met him twice. Hell, I almost got into a fight with him. Then, he was my lawyer when I got arrested. Faith called him in from New York.”

“My father moved to New York.” Lexie murmured to herself. It was like she was trying to gradually make sense of it, once piece of information at a time.

“Remember when ya told me ya dad had an affair with ya mom when his wife was pregnant?”

Lexie nodded, her eyes were huge with shock and confusion.

“How old are you?” He asked.

“Almost 35” She squeaked

“Faith would have been 35. You guys were the same age, give or take a couple months.”  

Lexie was now returning the pressure of the grip he had on her hand. She shuffled forwards, able to get a better view of her drawing of Harry. He suddenly seemed like even more of a mystery to her and no matter how many times she’d looked at the pencil drawing of him, no matter how much she had memorised every single line and area of shading, the man staring back at her was a complete stranger.

“Are you sure, Daryl? Are you sure this is Faith’s dad?” She uttered.

“Yeah. A hundred percent. I’d know him anywhere.” He affirmed.

She lowered her head, her hair falling in front of her face and Daryl held onto her even tighter. She wasn’t fighting his grip, in fact, she had been using it for balance, to keep her grounded. But at this point, she was struggling.

“I need a few minutes alone.” She whispered.

“We’ll leave. C’mon, Daryl.” Mel instructed as she got up and obediently moved to the door.

Lexie refused to let go of Daryl’s hand as he went to stand up and pulled him closer to her.

“I need you to do something for me.” She said, level with his ear.

“Anything.” He replied.

“I need you to let me borrow that photograph you have of Faith. Just for a few minutes. Please.”

Without hesitation, he dug into his pocket and retrieved the photograph. It was dog-eared and fading around the edges but the subject of the photo could still be seen clearly. He handed it to her and quickly glanced up at Mel, who was watching them intently. Having never shown her any affection in front of anyone before, he swallowed his doubts and left a lingering kiss on her forehead. She closed her eyes briefly and Daryl got up to join Mel, leaving Lexie alone.

 

In the kitchen, Mel and Daryl waited anxiously, at first not needing to speak to one another. They stood side by side, both leaning against the kitchen island with their arms crossed and their heads down. Daryl really wanted a cigarette, the pull of the addiction clawing inside his skin. But he told himself that Lexie was more important and that his own stress could wait. He caught Mel picking at the thread on the inside of her sweater sleeve, her thumb and index finger plucking the piece of cotton in a repetitive and mildly irritating tic.

“Think she’s OK?” He wanted to know.

“Yeah, she’ll be fine.” She replied quickly “She just needs a little time to get her head around it. She does her best thinking when she’s alone.”

“Alright. Good” He accepted.

They continued to wait. Mel eventually moved and poured herself a drink from a jug on the counter. She held out the glass to Daryl and he held up a hand briefly, refusing her offer. She shrugged and glugged down the drink quickly. When she put the glass back on the counter, she kept her hand around it and he could sense her staring at him without even having to look at her.

“I like you together. You and my sister.” She commented. Daryl kept his head low, and his arms crossed defensively over his chest. “I’ve never seen her let somebody hold her hand before. Then, when she let you kiss her, I have to admit I almost died with shock. It’s nice, seeing her close to someone like that. I can tell you really care for her.”

Daryl was uncomfortable. Not just with having to tell Lexie about her father, but with Mel witnessing for herself how close he and Lexie had become over the past few weeks. He wasn’t one for wearing his heart on his sleeve and discussing something so personal with someone other than Carol was generally a non-negotiable. Having to fess up to Carl was bad enough, but he knew the kid wouldn’t snitch on him. Mel, was a different matter altogether, but she did always have Lexie’s best interests at heart, as she had proved by the way she was handling the situation.

“So I’m good enough for her even though I’m an ex drug runner, right?.” He grunted

“Ahh, Aaron’s right. That shit isn’t important anymore. That’s who you used to be.” She mused.

“I do care about her. A lot.” He assured her

“Daryl, please don’t let this revelation ruin what you guys have. It’s all about the past and the past doesn’t matter anymore. Yeah, Lexie has a right to know about her biological family. But it shouldn’t have to change anything.”

He briefly caught her eye before looking away again, not wanting her to be able to read how he felt. He was unsettled by her out of the blue maturity and balanced view of things when he remembered that Lexie had never once wavered in her knowledge that her sister loved her.

“Way things are…with me n’ her…I don’t wanna ruin nothin’.” He expressed.

He had known in his heart that this could put a strain on what was happening between them. Lexie now had to come to terms with the fact that her long lost half sister was Daryl’s great love. And Daryl had to look Lexie in the face and not see Faith, now with the added knowledge that they were actually related and they didn’t just look alike out of coincidence. Lexie’s parentage and difficult childhood had taken its toll on her and even though she made out that she had accepted it, it had obviously proved to be a fragile subject in her life.

Daryl and Mel waited a few more minutes before she craned her neck around the door frame to see Lexie sat with her head in her hands with the photograph of Faith on the table next to the drawing of their father, she was sniffing loudly and Mel wanted to run to her. To wrap her in her arms and tell her that it changed nothing. But she knew Lexie like no one else and instead, opted to leave her for a little longer.

 

When she and Daryl re-emerged, Lexie was still sat on the edge of her seat with Faith’s photo now face down on her knee. Her face was puffy and red. She peered up at them both and waved a hand at the empty spaces next to her and opposite. They both dutifully sat down and waited. Lexie side glanced at Daryl and he detected a tiny hint of a smile on her face. He turned his body to face her, bending one leg and taking her hand again. She gratefully accepted, blinking the tears from her eyes and taking a deep breath.

“OK… so we had the same father.” She confirmed. “Through my whole childhood, I knew my father had a daughter. That’s not a surprise to me. I’m not angry that she got a chance to be with our father and I didn’t, I had wonderful parents. _We_ had wonderful parents” She said to Mel, who was listening intently across the coffee table. “What makes me sad is that I never got a chance to know her. She was my half sister and I never got a chance to meet her, to find out about our similarities or our differences. It’s not fair that it was taken away from me, that I couldn’t have a chance to be her sister. Mel, this isn’t a reflection on you, you’re not my biological sister but I don’t give a damn. You’re my sister all the same and I love you.”

Mel smiled tearfully and nodded. “I love you too.”

Lexie then turned to Daryl.

“If the world hadn’t gone to shit, would you have married her?” She asked.

Such a deep and private question would normally have provoked an angry or avoidant reply from him, but he simply nodded once.

“Yeah, in a heartbeat.” He responded. Lexie sniffed and wiped a tear from her eye with her fingers. Although she was emotional, she still smiled and both Daryl and Mel could see it meant she had accepted the idea as much as she could at that point.

“If she was good enough for you to want to be with for the rest of your life, she must have been an amazing person. I want to know about her.” She sniffed.

“Im’ma tell ya whatever ya wanna know.” He assured her. “Just gotta ask”

She still had the photograph pinched between her fingers.

“Please can I show this to Mel?” She whispered. Her face was tight from the dried tears on her cheeks and her eyes were still bloodshot, but she remained as pretty as ever to Daryl as she subtly smiled at him.

“Yeah, sure.” He agreed.

Lexie held out the photograph to Mel. “This is my… other sister, Faith” She said, as she giggled slightly.

“Her name was Faith Harrington.” Daryl told them.

Mel grinned and took the photo. She quietly gazed down at it for a few seconds before sneaking a peep at Daryl.

“Damn, Daryl. First her and now Lex. You’re a lucky, lucky boy.” She smirked.

Daryl rolled his eyes. “Believe me, I know.” He huffed.

To Mel, she was looking at a photograph of Lexie in a ball gown. Their likeness was uncanny, almost twin like and she wondered if their personalities were just as similar. Lexie was unlike anyone she had ever met before, except for Daryl to an extent. So, she highly doubted that Faith had been a carbon copy.

“You guys are so similar.” Mel commented. “It’s so weird.”

“Told ya” Daryl quipped as he squeezed her hand. She chuckled gently and winked at him, sending his nerves into an entirely relaxed state.

_She’s alright. She’s fine._

“Im’ma head back to the house.” Daryl announced “That’s if ya gonna be OK.”

“I’m OK. I just need you to understand that I need to spend some time on my own for a while, get my head around this.” She confirmed.

“Alright” He said, leaning into her and unlacing his fingers from her grasp. He raised his hand and gently urged her to turn her face to him with an index finger under her chin. Mel raised both eyebrows, clamped a hand over her mouth and almost squealed with happiness at the sight of Daryl planting a tender kiss on her lips. The thought of not kissing her hadn’t even crossed his mind. In that moment, he didn’t care that Mel was there, he needed to show her that nothing had changed.

Lexie smiled against him and he slowly moved back.

“I’ll check in with ya in a few hours.” He whispered, so quietly that Mel didn’t catch it.

“No.” Lexie told him. “Give me time.”

When he nodded at her and stood up. He scooped up his bag and found that Mel also rose from her seat. She handed him his photograph back and politely walked him to the door. Turning into the hallway and out of earshot of Lexie, Mel placed a hand on the handle of the door but didn’t open it right away.

“I’m um…I’m sorry. For your loss. That must have been hard. Faith, she was beautiful.” She said sincerely.

Daryl never had Lexie pegged as a liar when she had tried to explain that Mel was somewhat misunderstood, but he also never guessed that she could be as considerate and shockingly selfless as she had been in the last few hours. He had discovered a new-found respect for her.

“Thanks” He replied “She was. But um…so is Lexie.”

“Gah, you’re killing me. Get outta here, Mr. perfect.” She joked, hauling the door open and stepping aside.

Daryl paused on his way out. “Listen, I appreciate the help. You know her better than anyone. Would have gone all around my ass to get to my elbow if ya weren’t here.”

Mel laughed and used this one chance to gain herself a sneaky feel by momentarily placing a hand on his bare bicep.

“Don’t be stupid.” She said “I can see that you know her better than you think you do. Have a good night.”

He offered her a half smile and stepped outside.

“You too” he said over his shoulder before wandering out into the dark.

*****

Two days later and Lexie had been so distant and avoidant that Daryl had only caught sight of her once or twice and the urge to track her down and talk to her was becoming overwhelming. He curled his hand around the Metal handle of the tower while he finished his smoke. He knew Lexie was at the top, he’d watched her disappear inside an hour ago, figuring that she’d asked to take some shifts to keep herself busy.

Someone clearing their throat stirred him from his thoughts and he glanced up to see a dishevelled looking Mel stood on Deanna’s doorstep with her arms crossed. She shot him a suspicious look and descended the steps, quietly approaching him.

“Oh no. No, no, no. Don’t even think about it, you creeper.” She warned, wagging a finger at him. He tilted his head back and looked down his nose at her, noticing her tussled state and her reddened neck.

“What’cha been doin’ at Deanna’s place?” He asked very deliberately. Lexie had mentioned more than once that she hated it when Mel wasted her time with the likes of Spencer. Right now, Daryl was about to use this information to his advantage.

“Discussing Pantry…stuff….and…things.” She dismissed.

“Stuff and things?” Daryl challenged, smirking slightly.

“Yes.” Mel nodded, adjusting the neckline of her shirt and checking it was buttoned properly.

“Spencer have anythin’ to do with the stuff and things?” He asked.

“Oh _fine_.” She spat. “I can’t let you go up there though, she wants to be alone. You know that”

“Fuckin’ around with that douchebag and you’re callin me a creeper. Screw you, Mel” He chuckled.

“Well, you didn’t want to fuck around with me so a girl has to go elsewhere to get her kicks.” She shot back.

He pursed his lips and shook his head in disbelief. She was one to be reckoned with when it came to having the upper hand in playful jabs in conversation and he figured Lexie often managed to have the last word due to not only her higher intelligence but also her knowledge of her sister and exactly how her mind worked.

“Jeez.” He huffed, rubbing his chin. “Keep it up and im’ma tell her where you’ve been tonight.”

“I can’t let you go up there.” She told him, sticking to her guns.

“You gonna stop me?” He asked.

She stuck an exposed leg out, her modesty shielded by a small pair of denim short shorts and her feet adorned with a pair of stiletto heeled ankle boots.

“Fucking right I’m gonna stop you. Don’t make me stamp on your foot, Mr. These heels can pierce steel.” She said, raising an eyebrow at him.

“I just wanna make sure she’s alright.”

“She’s fine, Daryl. She’s eating and sleeping and working. She needs to be left alone.”

He chewed on his bottom lip, wanting so badly to ignore Mel and charge up the tower stairs to Lexie. To see for himself that she was fine. But Mel was stopping him for a reason and he had to trust that she knew her sister, and that she was also keeping an eye on her.

 

On her way back from her tower shift she passed his house in the darkness, he knew she was aware of his presence beside Carol on the front porch, but she chose not to acknowledge either of them. The act had instilled a feeling of impending doom in his stomach, sat there like a bomb waiting to explode. He knew she needed time and had a lot to process, but the thought of it leading to her not wanting to have anything to do with him was beginning to eat away at his patience and temper.

“What’s going on, Daryl?” Carol prodded, noting Lexie’s failure to even smile at either of them and Daryl’s stiffening stance in his seat.

“Found somethin’ out a couple days ago. Somethin’ big. To do with Lexie…and Faith. Think it mighta fucked everything up.”

She briefly rose from her seat and pulled it over the wooden beams of the floor so she could sit closer to him. He appreciated the gesture, it meant he wouldn’t have to raise his voice and risk anyone else hearing.

“Tell me.” She cooed.

“Lexie’s biological father. Harry. He was Faith’s ol’ man too. The same guy.”

There was a heavy and still silence while Carol mulled over what she was being told. Daryl waited, not wanting to add anything more just yet until he was sure she’d heard him clearly.

“They’re half-sisters?” She asked, receiving a solemn nod from him. “Oh my god. That is…wow. What a small world.”

“Yeah. Me and Mel, we told her a couple nights ago. Seemed to take it as well as we’d hoped. But there’s been this radio silence ever since. She’s actin’ like I don’t exist now.”

Carol thought for a moment, leaning back in her chair and pulling the tattered blanket around her shoulders further across her torso, wrapping her arms around herself to protect her from the cold night air that never seemed to bother Daryl and his cut off sleeves.

“Going to be tough for her, she has to come to terms with the fact that she had a long-lost sister, and that you were in love with said long-lost sister.” She mused.

“I know” He huffed. “It’s screwed up.”

“How did you find out?” She queried.

“She draws. These real lifelike drawings. Let me see some of her stuff. There he was, lookin’ right at me. Same name. Same guy.” He explained. “I’d know his smartass face anywhere.”

Carol exhaled loudly, her attention being caught momentarily by Poe darting across the front lawn in the dark.

“You’re going to have to give her time, Daryl.” She warned.

“I need to know she’s alright. I aint talked to her but I can tell somethin’s changed” He complained.

“Then ask Mel or Aaron, but don’t seek Lexie out. She will come to you when she’s ready.”

Daryl had always taken Carol’s advice as gospel, she was his logic when he was being impulsive but this time, his emotions were overriding any advice given to him. He was teetering on panic mode, worried that all the progress he’d made with Lexie was about to be undone, all because of Harry. All because she might find it a little bit too strange to be involved with her long-lost sister’s boyfriend.

After Carol excused herself and headed inside, Daryl spied Lexie slinking past the houses along the perimeter wall with her backpack on and her hood up.

 _I know where you’re going._  He thought.

 

 

It was against all his better judgement, everything that Mel and Carol had told him. But he still found himself stood outside the door to the Abandoned store in the middle of the night. Aided only by the light of a flashlight which he had now switched off in case she saw the beam of light through the window. He stood in the shadows, spotting her through the dusty and stained window, her outline was blurred at first, so he carefully swept dust from the glass. Not perfect, but it was good enough for him.

She was completely wrapped up in what she was drawing. Sat cross legged on the floor in front of the fire in the trash can. From his vantage point, he couldn’t see what it was she was drawing, but expected it would be just as spectacular as everything else she had created. When she looked up and thoughtfully stared off into space for a few moments, he noticed that she looked sad. Her eyes were dejected and her shoulders slumped. She turned her pencil to the side and began to nibble on it, leaving small dents along the surface. He wanted to reach out to her, to just ask her if anything would change between them. To find out what to expect. He sighed deeply and pushed the door open. She startled when she saw him before flipping the front cover of her pad over to obscure her work and slapping her paper on the floor next to her.

“What are you doing here?” She groaned.

“You alright?”

She met his eye briefly, nodded to herself and decided that she was going to continue drawing after all. She opened the pad again and settled it on her lap, her hand flitting back and forth over the same part of the page, shading.

“You worried about me?” She questioned.

“Yeah. Guess I am.” He admitted.

“I asked you to understand that I needed to be alone. Yet, here you are.” Her tone was not what he had expected. It was cold and short, almost acidic to his ears.

“Can’t leave ya here without knowin’ you’re gonna be safe….y’know, with yaself.” He tried.

“Why? Because I cut myself when I was sad? Poor, fragile Lexie. Just go, Daryl.” She fired at him, her eyes flashing with anger. His chest constricted at the sight of her rage. He hadn’t expected this reaction, but understood that she had a lot to process. Her biological links had caused her years of torment and after years of attempting to come to terms with it, she now had to accept that her father had been happy to bring up a little girl that was as much his as she was. Except she was made to feel like she wasn’t worthy of him. Added to that, she had to try to comprehend that Faith had apparently set the bar high.

“I care about ya.” He told her.

She scoffed at him, but didn’t accuse him of lying.

“Please. It’s hard enough living up to her” She snapped “And that’s without knowing I’m her fucking sister. I bet she wasn’t a tragedy like me. I’m sorry to say I’m not like her. She might have wanted you to pester her, but that’s not me. Just leave me be. I made my own way in the world and didn’t need anyone holding my hand. Side effect of being thrown away like trash. But I’m not made of glass, nor am I in the right frame of mind to talk to you.”

“Alright.” He nodded, backing up to the door, his head spinning and his own anger now rising in his chest. Reaching the doorframe, he whirled around and bit his lip in a vain attempt to keep what he wanted to say confined to the walls of his mind. Instead, it tumbled out in what turned out to be a frustrated and loud lecture.

“Naw! Ya can’t say that shit to me! That aint fair! You’re right, you’re like her god damn twin but ya aint her! Ya nothin like her!” He raged “Can see that now more than ever, she wouldn’t be sat here by her fuckin self thinkin’ the world owes her somethin’ and takin it out on the people that care about her. Y’know how I can say that? Because I used to do that shit! Ya know what I had to look forward to as a kid, Lexie? My ol’ man fallin’ asleep before he could find an excuse to unleash all kinds of holy hell on me. Blood hittin’ the walls. My blood. The smell of crystal and weed and whiskey. I aint never had a fuckin’ birthday party, only gift I ever got was from Faith. Weren’t no presents under the tree for me on the holidays. Hell, we didn’t even have a tree! If we did, Merle woulda tried to fuckin’ smoke it!”

Lexie’s eyes flicked up and locked on his. He was leaning towards her, his arm moving quickly and with intent, aggressively pointing at her as he spoke. As much as her irritation had come as a surprise to him, his anger had shaken her.

“I aint known no different my whole life, had to learn the hard way and I was an asshole to everyone that tried to get close to me. But you, you’re smarter than this. So ya had a sister ya didn’t know about and she got chosen by the flashy lawyer over you. Ya said you were sad ya couldn’t know her, well she didn’t live no great life, Lexie! Not at first! Her mom cheated on Harry and that prick tossed her out on the damn street. He threw Faith out too because she reminded him of her mom! He did all that knowin’ he had you out there somewhere. They lived in motels and they almost starved until he took ‘em back. Then, she grows up n’ gets married n’ her husband gets blown up by some fuckin’ terrorist. Before ya start thinkin’ you got it rough, ya need to know more about her. Get some goddamn perspective.”

He stepped back and took a deep breath, breaking eye contact with her and hearing her set her pencil down on the ground next to her.

“Y’know…I came here because I care n’ yeah, I don’t want nothin’ to change between us. It’s all I can think about and it’s pissin’ me off! Sounds dumb but I worked hard to get as far as I have with you. It aint been easy, my head’s gotten loud and I can’t tell my ass from my elbow. When ya kissed me, everythin’ changed. Ya drive me fuckin’ crazy. You’re pretty and smart and funny and ya got all these talents…n’ you’re sexy as hell.”

He paused, needing time to compose himself and find a way to get out whatever else was left for him to say. He hadn’t planned it. For the first time in a long time, he was speaking straight from his heart, wearing it on his sleeve and placing himself at her mercy.

“I aint never said I wanted you to be like her. I want you to be like you. But not angry and spiteful like this.” He muttered before he rapidly headed for the door and slammed it behind him.

Lexie’s emotions heaved out of her in one tidal wave of tears and despair. She clutched her chest and squeezed her eyes shut, trying to stop the onslaught of sadness from consuming her. But it was winning and she opened her mouth, gasping for air as sobs echoed around the empty, concrete room. She wasn’t crying because she had made Daryl angry, she was crying because everything he’d said was true and she couldn’t believe she had allowed herself to become so clouded and carried away by her own emotions, so focused on the negative aspects of it instead of seeing how fortunate she had actually been. She had been incredibly lucky to have been adapted and as a result, never forced to live with a man that could throw a twelve-year-old out on the street for something her mother did. She may not be like Faith, but she couldn’t argue that Daryl had never asked her to be, never expressed any interest that he wanted her to be despite their obvious physical similarities.

 

Lexie sat with Daryl’s heartfelt rant for hours that night, pouring over every single detail of everything he’d said. Burning into her memory the information about Faith’s life and even more so, his confession of what he thought of her. She hadn’t slept or eaten, returning to the house only when the sun was threatening to rise and even then, she refused to go to bed. Instead choosing to sit on the front perch, her drawing pinched between her fingers and blowing in the gentle breeze as the sun began to beat down onto her back. She watched Daryl and Rick pack a car, checkout weapons with Olivia and leave through the gate just after sunrise. Daryl hadn’t even turned around to look at the house, where he would have undoubtedly spotted her. She suspected that was for a reason. Climbing back into her room, she plucked a large envelope from a drawer that was filled to the brim with art supplies from the Artists house and slid her drawing inside it. Tucking it under her arm, she headed out of her room and down the stairs.

 

On the front porch of the house next door, Carol was sweeping the decking. She stopped immediately when she spotted Lexie and leaned the broom against the side of the house. She rubbed her hands on her jeans and offered her a small smile as Lexie stopped at the bottom of the steps.

“Good morning” Carol beamed.

“Morning” Lexie muttered.

“Daryl’s not here, he’s just left with Rick.”

“I know.” She replied. Not knowing how else to ask, she simply held out the envelope and dropped her eyes to the floor. “Please can you give to him when he gets back?”

Carol took the envelope and opened the top slightly with the tips of her fingers, peering inside, she could see it contained a sheet of thick paper.

“Of course.” She agreed.

“Please don’t let anybody but Daryl see it and tell him to look at both sides.” She uttered, her thumbs looped into her back pants and her head still dipped low, not being able to bring herself to look up. She knew Daryl had probably told Carol everything and she couldn’t face the prospect of having to look her in the eye.

“Yes, I will.”

“Thank you” Lexie said, turning on her heels.

“Wait! Lexie, please.” Carol called out.

Lexie stopped a couple of feet away, her back still turned, but she looked over her shoulder as she shoved her hands into the pockets of her hoodie.

“Are you OK?” She asked genuinely.

Lexie’s eyes flickered down to the ground and then back up to Carol as she licked her lips. Carol thought she wasn’t going to answer when what felt like many minutes passed and she stood statue still on the lawn.

“I am when I’m with him.” She replied quietly.

Carol nodded and smiled at her, letting her retreat back to her house and waiting for her to vanish inside before she stepped into the hallway and opened the envelope. She took hold of the paper inside and slid it out. Her eyes widened and her mouth curled into a wide smile. She flipped the paper over and read the back.

“Something tells me you won’t have to wait long.” She said to herself as she slipped the page back into it’s covering.  


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi All!  
> Short little chapter to keep things moving. Sorry for the delay, been super duper busy. Thank so much for all the comments!  
> Anyway...
> 
> FLUFF!

As the day progressed into the night, Lexie lay on her stomach on her bed, her legs bent up behind her and crossed at the ankles. She was so focused on the book she was reading; her tongue had peeked out from the side of her mouth and Poe had been meowing at the door to be let downstairs for the past fifteen minutes and she hadn’t even heard him. Mel had brought her a glass of wine and it had remained on the nightstand, untouched and gathering dust since. She was escaping, taking some time out of her own head and transporting herself into the authors creation with every printed line the black ink created. She still felt like she was reeling from shock, but gradually she had found her attitude was changing, becoming more positive and inquisitive. She just hoped with everything she had that Daryl wouldn’t still be angry with her after seeing her gift to him.

She changed into her nightwear, a pair of loose fitting black, cotton pants and her usual choice of a tank top, also in black. When Daryl knocked on the outside of her bedroom window, she was so immersed in her task that she nearly didn’t hear him. The noise had brought her back to the then and there and she also noticed Poe, who was now screaming at the top of his lungs in a desperate attempt to get his chosen human to let him downstairs so he could get to his bowl of food.

She shook her head quickly, shut the book and ran her hands through her hair before she shuffled off the bed, let Poe out and let Daryl in. He climbed down from the window ledge and stood in front of her wordlessly. She bit her lip nervously and prepared herself for another rage-fuelled rant. Her eyes lowered and she noticed he was holding the envelope in his hand.

“I aint opened it yet.” He told her as he swerved past her and went to sit on the edge of her bed. She followed and crawled up onto the covers, curling up on the pillows by the headboard and hugging her knees. He opened the envelope and glanced up at her, noting her jumpy and uneasy demeanour. When he pulled the page out, his lips parted and his eyebrows raised slightly. Lexie could see the air leave his lungs. She held her breath.

In his hands, Daryl held a replica of his photograph of Faith. Except there was one significant difference; instead of her cell phone being held in her hand in order to take the photo and partially covering part of her waist, Lexie had omitted it. Instead drawing her with her hands by her sides. Daryl was staring down at the sketch like it was the most precious thing he had ever seen; his hands only lightly gripped the paper as he tried to avoid creasing it.

“Turn it over.” Lexie instructed.

He slowly turned the page to reveal Lexie’s swirling, italic handwriting. 

‘ _If you are alone, I’ll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I’ll be your shoulder. If you are not happy, I’ll be your smile. If you need me, I am always there. To live in hearts we leave behind is not to die.’_

“Why’d you do this?” He asked, his voice cracked and he turned away from her. She felt a rising sense of panic that she’d seriously upset him.

“Because your photograph is fading. I did one for myself too, the exact same. I wanted you to know that she can still mean everything to you and-and I’m good with that.”

“That mean what I think it means?” He replied, turning back and locking eyes with her. His were bloodshot and glassy, she had never seen him cry before and guessed he had probably only done so once in his life, when he lost Faith. While he wasn’t visibly sobbing, she could tell it was taking a lot of his self control not to let tears escape in front of her.

“What do you think it means?” She queried.

“That I can’t think the same of you” He stated.

She swallowed hard and shook her head. “No. No, Daryl. I don’t want things to change between us”

“Neither do I.”

“G-good because- because I was happy. I am happy. When I’m with you and I know you probably hate me right now-“

“-what?!” He interrupted. “I don’t hate ya, Lexie. That’s bullshit.”

“Oh… well, good.”

“Was just frustrated. Needed you to see the bigger picture. I been there before, takin’ shit out on people, being angry all the time. Gets ya nowhere.” He explained

“I know, you’re right. Everything you said was right.” She conceded

He looked down at the drawing in his hands having turned it back over again. It was stunning, she had captured every fine detail of her face, her dress, even the room behind her and it made him feel like he was back there with her. It made him miss her, but it also immortalised her in a moment that she would have preferred him to remember, instead of the image of her suffering from the bite of a Walker. Lexie had done that for him, given him a memory so valuable that he would treasure it for the rest of his life.

“This is amazin’. She’d be real grateful, you doin’ this...” He whispered. “...Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

He placed the drawing on the bed beside him and kicked his boots off. Lexie took that as a sign he was planning to stay and her nervous demeanour began to calm, her heart slowed and her movements became less jumpy. She hadn’t wanted to fight with him, or even have him be mad at her anymore despite the fact that he had managed to talk some sense into her. She wanted things to go back to the way they were.

She surprised him when she suddenly crawled forwards, springing from her spot and launching herself at him, she slowed just in time to plant a long and sensual kiss on his lips. He had backed away slightly before that same, familiar addiction to her swept over him and he kissed her back, covering her hand with his on the sheets beside him. When her lips left his, she backed up to her previous position, eyeing him bashfully.

“I’m sorry. For being rude to you.” She whispered.

“Forget it.” He smiled.

He picked up the drawing, slid it back into the envelope and got to his feet, walking over to the window and leaning it against the glass to remind himself to take it with him when he left. When he turned around, Lexie was also stood up.

“I um… I missed ya.” He admitted. “Can stay a while, if ya ain’t busy.”

“Do I look busy?” She shot at him, harking back to his snappy remark at her on the porch the previous week. He shook his head and stifled a smile. She moved closer to him and her fingers nudged into his. Slowly, she walked backwards, leading him to the bed. When her calves hit the bed frame she stopped and looked up into his eyes.

“How is your shoulder now?” She asked.

“Hell of a lot better now the stitches are out.” He replied.

She didn’t respond, instead she lifted her hands and began to gradually push up, over his shirt to his chest.

“Are you staying with me tonight?” She asked.

For a moment, he couldn’t answer her. He was too entranced by the look in her eyes, her figure-hugging pants and the low neckline of her top. He blinked away the lust fuelled trance he’d found himself in and swallowed hard.

“Uh-you mean ‘stay’ like…wait, what do you mean?” He stammered.

Lexie pulled him close to her by the front of his shirt and tickled his neck with the tip of her nose.

“What do you want it to mean?” She purred in his ear.

“Um…” He grunted, panic creeping in. It dawned on him that no matter how confident he’d made himself out to be during previous trysts, sooner or later he would be faced with the real deal and the thought sent nerves coursing through his body. He didn’t want to mess up, do or say something wrong or appear too pushy or not pushy enough. He wished his approach to such situations was more consistent and less sporadically bold.

She was kissing his neck and his eyes nearly rolled back into his head as he tilted it back and to the side, allowing her a larger area to work with. The satisfaction of her fingers unfastening his shirt and travelling inside, spreading across his chest was enough to silence him and make him forget that he had a question to answer. Then, he felt teeth on his neck and his body shuddered with pleasure. Ever so slightly bringing his flesh between them, the delightful pain, the yearning, gnawing carnality sounding from his throat in a badly suppressed growl.

“Lexie-“

“-Ssh” She hushed.

The desire to touch her was too great to ignore and his hands found her waist, shoving up, under her top. Her body was taut, sculpted in all the right places with the strength in her back evident under his palms. She leaned back from his neck, catching him glaring at her with a tightened jaw and darkened eyes. She was completely unravelling him, much like he’d done to her in the kitchen of the Artists house and he couldn’t help but wonder if going through with what they both obviously wanted was the right thing to do after such an emotional and revelatory few days. Even knowing now that Lexie and Faith were sisters had changed nothing for him, instead it had proved that he knew he had a chance to be happy. He wanted Lexie in every way and he was ready, provided she was too. As he tried to find some scrap of reasonable and logical thought amongst the powerful urge to give in, she had found his belt and was unbuckling it while she kissed his chest.

Lexie couldn’t even pinpoint the moment she had decided she was going to go this far and now felt like she was simply past the point of no return. Yes, she wanted him more than she had ever wanted anyone else but there was still a simmering reluctance to go much further, her self-consciousness toying with her anxiety. She wanted to be able to trust that her scars wouldn’t be an issue, but the reality was; they were to her.

His hands folded over hers, stopping her just as she released his belt and she pulled back, peering up at him with worried eyes.

“I aint sure this is what ya really want right now.” He divulged between shallow breaths.

“You’re not ready?” She asked.

She stumbled slightly when he suddenly kissed her. Roughly. Urgently. Teeth clanking together and fingers gripping the back of her head. She groaned and it drove him crazy. When he stopped after what seemed like forever, suspended in a blissful, sensual encounter, Lexie actually fought to catch her breath.

“I’m ready. You’re what I want.” He breathed. She did know that much, she could feel it radiating, pulsing against her lower abdomen as her body pressed to his and it was like some kind of kryptonite that diminished her power to say no. “But I aint doin’ this unless you’re right here with me, on the same page.”

“I’m-I’m trying.” She managed.

“I aint goin’ nowhere. I’ll wait.” He assured her.

She hesitated, shyly dipping her head and closing her arms around his waist. Her cheek was flush against his chest and she could hear the demanding thud of his heart.

“OK” she uttered.

He nuzzled his face into her hair and smiled to himself.

 _This is fuckin’ torture. But it’ll be worth it._ He thought.

Lexie slid her arms down his body and brought them around to his front again, buckling his belt back up for him. She eyed the now open buttons on his shirt and tilted her head to the left thoughtfully, pursing her lips to the side before shaking her head. No. Those could stay open.

Daryl huffed in amusement at her but made no attempt to close his shirt. He was more than happy to let her have her way.

She flopped back on the bed and lay on her side, watching as he climbed on and lay beside her on his back. She thought he looked quite the vision in his leather vest and undone, black shirt with cut off sleeves and she licked her lips as her eyes crept over him.

“Will you tell me about Faith?” She asked.

He turned his head to look at her and lifted his arm, motioning for her to move closer. She dragged herself to him and lay her head on his chest while he stroked her hair.

“What ya wanna know?”

“Tell me about the first time you met her.” She hummed as she glided a hand over his abdomen. His muscles tightened briefly under her touch before relaxing again and she told herself he was just getting used to her.

“Really? Ya don’t wanna know about her life or somethin’?” he questioned.  

“Yes. But first, I want you to tell me what your first impression of her was.” She stated plainly.

“Um… Alright. I was at the bar with Merle. Walked in and didn’t even look up. Merle was getting the drinks so I just made my way to the pool table. After a while we go outside for a smoke and he spots her, starts making moves on her and she wasn’t havin’ any of it. My first impression of her? When I first saw her, I remember standing there feelin’ like I’d been hit by a fuckin’ bus. I hadn’t ever seen a woman that looked like her except on the TV and in the movies. Think Merle thought the same, I had to pull him away, he was pissin’ her off somethin’ awful.”

 As he spoke, Lexie experienced the pleasant rumble of his voice through his chest and her scalp tingled from the sensation of him playing with her hair.

“Did she speak to you?” She probed.

“Not then. But she did later. When Merle tried it again at the bar. Think she had enough, poured a whole damn beer in his lap. Asshole deserved it. He stormed out, got his panties in a wad over it. She looks at me and she says “it’s on me”. I just stood there, needed a minute. In the end I just said no and walked away. What a jackass. I ain’t scared of much, but she was pretty terrifyin’.”

“Why?” Lexie continued to question.

“Ya know why. You’ve seen her picture. Never had nobody go into that bar that looked as fine as that. I was as lost as last years Easter egg around her.”

Lexie giggled to herself as she chewed on her thumbnail, her head still nestled against his chest. He wound strands of her hair around his fingers as he talked and realised how much he had missed the sensation of Faith laying on his chest. Except now it was Lexie, and that was OK.

“Ran into her the next day at the lake. Told me her name. I was fixin’ to get outta there faster than a knife through butter once she saw me. Guess I didn’t see a point in gettin’ to know her. Figured she wouldn’t want nothin’ to do with some criminal redneck like me.”

“She must have liked what she saw too” Lexie pointed out

“Yeah. Guess she did. We kept runnin’ into each other. Before I knew it, she’d invited me to that charity thing. She took that photo of herself before she left the house. That night changed everythin’ for me. She never looked at me like she was better than me. Even though I always thought she was. She hated it. Got mad at me a lot for that.”

“I can see why. That would make me mad too.”

He dropped her hair and lowered his arm, settling his hand on her waist as he leaned to the side to kiss the top of her head.

“I know she would have done whatever it took to find ya if she knew about ya.”

“I feel like she was right in front of me the whole time. We ended up living in the same town and we had no idea.” She expressed.

“Yeah, it’s crazy.”

Conversation from that point became scarce when Lexie craned her neck up and looked at him. She reached out and moved his hair from his face, finding that he rolled her back and kissed her. She draped her arms over his shoulders and what followed was an immeasurable amount of time laden with light caresses and an exploration of each other under the mutual understanding that it didn’t have to progress into anything more. She allowed him to leave a line of small kisses down her chest as she lay on her back, to the point where he could drag her top down in the middle ever so slightly, his lips meeting the small space between her breasts. When he moved down to her stomach and slid her clothing up, she didn’t protest. She just watched him work on her, kissing across her stomach to the waistline of her pants. She smiled at him every time he looked up and caught her eye, checking she was OK. Her skin was aglow in the candlelight, tinted in a yellowy orange hue like it were fire. His touch was like a drug in her veins and she was more than content with her new addiction. When he moved back over her, staring down at her on his hands and knees his lips were shiny and his eyes swept over her face. He lowered himself slightly so he was able to brush his nose against hers. She grinned and looped her index fingers through the sides of his belt, pulling his hips closer to her. He shifted and lay next to her, journeying the fingers of one hand over the side of her face.

 

 *****

She was running, running as fast as she could, her boots slapping the asphalt and her hair trailing wildly behind her. There was a bridge up ahead, a bridge she knew she needed to cross. A beacon with lights adorning it’s sides. But then her legs were cement, the ground sticky, chewing gum like, holding her to the ground where she was. She was wading through soup, treading against a tide that wouldn’t let her gain momentum. A tide that wanted her to stop and endure. A voice shouted from behind her and she tried even harder, her mind screaming at her to move. _Just move. Move your legs._ But her boots are too heavy and her muscles have wasted away to nothing and her heart can’t work fast enough. She’s stuck. Still fighting but not moving. The voice grows closer still and she panics, tries to use her arms to gather some strength against the invisible force that holds her still. It calls out.

_‘Take her away, Janine. Take her away. I don’t want her. I already have a daughter. Her name is Faith’_

She knows she has to look. She doesn’t want to but she turns her body, the tacky, heavy air around her allowing her to move finally. This is acceptable, this is allowed. But no running away. She expects to see her father. But it’s not Harry. It’s Faith. She is wearing her long, fitted, black gown and she’s smiling. A wide, beautiful, beaming smile that was full of glorious light.

_“It’s time to cross the bridge. Move on. Then, burn it.”_

Lexie didn’t know when she’d fallen asleep but when her eyes snapped open and she gasped in a large gulp of breath, she wiggled her toes and bent her knees slightly, realising she could move after all. It was a dream. Just a dream. Her body began to relax and her muscles loosened. She blinked away sleep and lifted a hand, rubbing over her forehead and eyes before she noticed the crook of her neck was extremely warm. Daryl was fast asleep with his face pushed against her hair and neck, his rhythmic, heavy breathing was so soothing it could have easily lulled her back to sleep. She could have stayed there forever with him sleeping on her, his big arm thrown over her stomach, a dead weight pinning her where she was. She slid her hand across his forearm, stopping below his elbow and curling her fingers around him. He stirred briefly and she heard him grunt and nestle closer to her. She smiled up at the ceiling. After a few minutes of stillness passed, she could see the light starting to rise on the other side of the drapes and Daryl stirred once more, pulling away from her and rolling onto his back. She glanced to the side in time to see his eyes open.

 “Hey” She whispered.

“Hmmph Hey.” he grumbled as he rubbed at his eyes with the heels of his hands. “Forgot where I was for a minute.”

She turned onto her side, placing a hand on the pillow under her head and looked over him. He sighed deeply, seemingly in thought before he glanced at her and met her eyes.

“Kinda missed this.” He admitted. He had missed it. Back at the Artists house he would find that he woke earlier than her and could allow himself some time to simply enjoy being beside her.

“Me too.” She uttered. “Last night was nice”

Daryl changed position, copying her by laying on his side and drawing a line back and forth over the side of her hand on the pillow with the tip of his index finger.

“Which part?” He asked gingerly.

“All of it” She replied “especially the kissing part.”

His eyes flickered away from hers for a few seconds, searching his line of vision for something to take his bashfulness away. When he summed up the courage to respond to her, he shifted closer and brushed a piece of hair from her eyes.

“You uh-you liked that, huh?” He queried.

“Mmhmm” she nodded shyly.

Brushing his nose on hers and leaving a small kiss on her lips, he closed his eyes.

“liked doin’ it.” He whispered.

Her cheeks grew warm and shyness swept over her. She buried her face in his cheek as he curled his arm around her, pulling her closer to him. Poe, hearing the hushed whispers from inside the room, began to claw and dig at the outside of the door. His strangled meows for attention muffling through the wood.

“Noisy ass cat.” Daryl complained.

“He just wants attention.” Lexie mumbled.

“Yeah, well he can wait his damn turn.” He whispered to her.

She giggled against him while he kissed over her face and she was sure she had never felt this rush of sparkling excitement in every cell of her body before. He made her feel safe and wanted and like she was this precious thing he couldn’t be without.

“I should get goin’ soon.” He told her.

“OK.” She said, shuffling back slightly so she could see his face.

“Try and avoid the third degree when I walk back into the house. Don’t think I can take much more of Rick’s smug grin.” He contemplated.

Undecided about whether or not to tell him about her dream, she figured she would think it over some more before coming to a decision. In fact, she thought she should adopt the same method with everything else too, seeing as her impulsivity had drawn her into a difficult situation with Daryl and she’d almost ruined things before they’d really started. But now she had some clarity, some perspective with which to work and she had a lot of thinking to do but the knowledge that Daryl was by her side and wasn’t going anywhere was already making things easier.

 *****

By the time Lexie had emerged from her room, it was almost mid-morning and Mel was up and dressed. It was a rarity for Lexie to emerge any later than 7am and for Mel to rise from her slumber before 10am but today was somehow different and both sisters had found themselves in limbo. Mel had spent the entire night worrying about Lexie, as she had done since she’d been given the news about her father. While Lexie had been reluctant to tear herself away from Daryl, knowing she was now going to seek comfort in him if she wanted to or not.

The smell of oatmeal and honey drifted up the staircase and hit Lexie’s nose as she descended the stairs. Her stomach growled and she hadn’t realised just how hungry she had been. She could hear Mel singing to herself in the kitchen as she closed cupboards and rattled cutlery. She padded into the kitchen and sat at the island, grabbing a mug and pouring herself a coffee.

“Morning sleepy head.” Mel smiled over her shoulder. “Thought you were going to stay up there all day.”

“Mmm” Lexie grumbled. “Daryl stayed.”

For a split second, Mel froze before whirling around and slapping two bowls of oatmeal on the countertop.

“Daryl stayed with you last night?” She asked.

“Yeah, we’re good. Everything’s fine.” She shrugged as she sipped her coffee. Black, no sugar.

“I didn’t hear the door. He climb through your window like Batman or something?” Mel questioned.

Lexie, who had never actually told Mel about the perch but hadn’t actively kept it from her either, shrugged her shoulders. She had probably guessed by now that she had both a front and back perch to her room, as Mel’s room was designed in exactly the same way.

“Actually, yes.” Lexie told her.

“Hmm. The Redneck superhero. Sooo…are you OK?” Mel pressed before shovelling a heaped spoonful of Oatmeal into her mouth and instantly regretting it. Heat seared through her tongue and she leaned over the bowl, spitting half it out and cussing to herself. Lexie waited for her to get herself together before she answered.

“I’m fine. It was a shock and I freaked out but It’s time to move on. I have a lot to learn about Faith. Daryl loved her a lot, but that’s OK. I think there’s room in that broken heart of his for the both of us. Even if we occupy a half each.” Lexie mused thoughtfully.

She stirred the contents of her bowl with her spoon slowly, watching the swirling pattern develop.

“That’s a good way to look at it. You’re a better woman than I.” Mel admitted. “So, he stayed the night, huh? I hope he’s been filling you out like a damn application. God knows you need it.”

Lexie’s eyes shot up to Mel whose hands let go of the bowl and spoon she was using and flicked up into the air in surrender.

“Really, Mel?!” Lexie cried, exasperated.

Mel’s eyebrows knitted together and she dropped her hands, slapping them on the surface in defiance.

“Actually, yes! Really! C’mon, loosen up a little! You deserve some hot yoga.” She protested.

“It’s not that simple.” Lexie muttered.

“Why? Tell me.” Mel demanded.

The two sisters locked eyes in an unspoken game of chicken. Neither was willing to back down, both believing the other was being their insufferable self. Minutes passed and they only broke eye contact in order to pick up a mug or load more oatmeal onto a spoon.

“Ugh!” Lexie complained, throwing her hands up in frustration. “I’m not exactly confident at this, Mel!”

“Woah, I know, I know.” Mel agreed. “You don’t have to be.”

“How the fuck do you do this? How do you just jump into bed with someone, get what you want and not squirm with anxiety because they’re going to see parts of you that you hate?” Lexie confessed, wanting the ground to open up and suck her into a bottomless pit.

“You slept with Tyler and Stevie” Mel stated.

“I didn’t care about them like I care about Daryl. I didn’t care what they thought of me. Plus, it was dark. I guess the darkness was my friend.” She huffed.

Mel tilted her head to the side briefly as she thought. “Leave a candle on, the light is flattering and if I were you, I’d want to see Daryl in all his glory. Look, Lex. Guys don’t really think like we do. In the throes of passion, they’re hardly looking for stretch marks or scars or bits of fat that aren’t supposed to be there. They’re kind of concentrating on more important things. I promise you that.”

Lexie had almost finished up her coffee, left with the final dregs and she continued to stir her oatmeal absentmindedly.

“Will you stop looking so freaking miserable?!” Mel continued. “He think’s you’re beautiful. He told me himself. You have nothing to worry about.”

“He did?” Lexie said, looking up from her breakfast.

“I’m not making this shit up, Lex. I am insanely jealous.” She shot at her.

Mel had never tried to disguise the fact that she was envious, she liked Daryl first, after all. But a part of Lexie was quietly smug and as she sat opposite her sister, her coffee mug tilted to her lips, she smiled broadly.

 _Oh, I bet you are._ She thought.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another one! I had this pre-written so the next one is going to be a few days, I'M SO SORRY! ;)  
> More fluff!

That afternoon, Rick hard organised a group run and had chosen to take most of the able fighters with him, Daryl included. Glad she had a busy armoury shift to keep her busy, Lexie had been run off her feet for the first hour with people coming and going, checking guns and ammo out and taking extra knives and other supplies that were also stored with the weapons, like tools, ropes and flares. When the last person left, she flopped down into the chair at the desk and rested her forehead on the table in front of her, her arms framing her head. She secretly rolled her eyes in her cocoon at the sound of yet another person thudding down the steps. But her exasperations soon evaporated when she saw Daryl walk into the room. She rose to her feet and rounded the desk to stand in front of him. He hesitated and played awkwardly with his hands while he stood there.

“You need a gun? I’m sure Aaron checked you one out this morning.” She asked in an effort to try and prompt him.

“He did.” He uttered, rubbing at his short stubbly beard with one hand.

“Oh. OK” She accepted, albeit still confused.

He stepped forward and gently took hold of her face, his hands slipping past each cheek. He kissed her deeply and slowly, making every part of her body tingle as she relaxed in his grasp. His tongue worked into her mouth, swirling around hers and evoking a tuneful moan from her and he backed her up against the shelving. She held onto his arms as if she might lose him at any moment, fingertips pressing into the skin of his biceps. He sucked in a breath through his nose and felt her stumble against the metal frame, like her knees had buckled and he thought his own might do the same when he changed up his grip on her, swapping her cheeks and neck for her waist, firmly holding her hips to him. She didn’t want him to stop so she journeyed a hand up behind his head, into his hair so she could hold him where he was. She briefly opened an eye, checking the staircase was empty and they couldn’t be seen. The coast was clear. He groaned, pulling back ever so slightly, a smile emerging on his lips as they pressed to hers. She copied him, how could she not smile at such a random, intense and romantic gesture? He stepped back suddenly, his head low but his eyes scanning her face through the front strands of his hair.

 _He is gorgeous._ She thought.

He continued to step backwards, His hands leaving her hips and flopping down at his sides. The tip of one of his ears peeped out from his hair, a bright red signal that he was just as shy as her. He said nothing as he headed for the stairs, only glancing back at her as she stood there, dumbfounded and with every part of her body electrified by desire. Air left her lungs in a short huff and she nibbled her thumbnail while she watched him nod her a goodbye before he vanished up the steps.

_I could get used to these secret kisses._

Leaving the armoury steps, Daryl’s body and mind coursed with excitement and anticipation for the next time he would see Lexie and feel her skin under his fingers and her lips on his. She uncovered feelings in him he thought he would never feel again and the familiar, yet long lost happiness he once felt was beginning to fight its way to the forefront, prevailing over everything else.  He kept his head low as he swaggered across the street towards the waiting trucks by the gate, catching sight of Carl from the corner of his eye. He was stood on the porch of a house with Enid, the girl he had admitted to liking. Daryl slowed and squinted so he could clarify what he was seeing. Carl’s was almost hiding behind his hair, a shy smile on his face while Enid chatted animatedly to him. Daryl felt a strange surge of pride and he hoped that the kid had taken his advice, more than that, he hoped it had paid off.

“I told you I’d picked you up a gun this morning.” Aaron said, interrupting his thought process.

Daryl spun around to face an inquisitive glare from Lexie’s best friend and immediately began to try and deflect his unease by searching his pockets for his smokes. He found them, popped one in his mouth and lit up.

“I know” he mumbled under his breath.

“Then why did you go to the armo-oh...I get it.” Aaron nodded, giggling slightly but still being subtle enough so as not to attract the attentions of the others, who were mostly busying themselves packing vehicles and checking maps.

“Hope it was worth you being late” Aaron quipped.

“S’none of ya business. N’ I ain’t late” Daryl shot back, unintentionally sounding a lot snappier than he’d initially thought. Aaron shifted uncomfortably on the spot but his breezy smile remained.

“Accosting my best friend in her place of work. I’m going to have something to say about that. For the record, you _are_ late.” He argued.

“Well it aint gonna make no difference anyways, with you drivin’ we'll be behind everybody else.” Daryl jested, smoke rising up in a cloud above him. Aaron laughed and shook his head, taking his truck keys out from his pocket and spinning them around his index finger.

“It was worth it.” Daryl added.

Aaron side glanced at him, an amused yet questioning look on his face.

“Oh really?!” He exclaimed.

“S’all I’m tellin ya, man. Give it up.” He concluded.

“Alright.” Aaron grinned. “Fair enough. Seriously though, I’m happy for you guys. Both of you.”

Daryl emitted a mild snort of amusement and shook his head.

“Quit gettin’ all damn sappy.” He dismissed.

“Right, right, because I’m the one sneaking into the armoury for a smooch with my girl before we leave the gates.” Aaron chuckled.

“Shut up, man.” He huffed. “She aint my girl.”

Aaron gave him a shocked look and lightly tapped his arm with the back of his hand.

“Oh come on, Daryl. Look, you’ve taught me a hell of a lot of survival skills and I owe you my life but please, don’t make me have to break out ‘relationships 101 with Aaron’ here. You asked me to help you make that house safe, you organised cover for the armoury and the tower and all so you could take her away because she seemed sad to you. I could also see it in your face when you found out about her father. You care so much about her, you came to the people that were closest to her first, because you knew she’d need us. Then, there’s the fact that she almost shot Spencer trying to get to you. You guys are way past friends here.” He explained. 

Daryl did not like this topic of conversation and focused his eyes on the others wandering about by the gate instead of on Aaron’s waiting expression. He hoped Rick would start calling everyone together right about now so he’d be saved from having to respond, but there was no such luck.

“Never got used to it” He admitted. “Even with Faith, it was weird. Bein’ a…boyfriend.” His face screwed up in disgust and the word seemed to fall out of his mouth as if he were spitting it away. He had always hated the thought of having any kind of romantic label attached to him, mainly because being worthy of one wasn’t something that had crossed his mind. Aaron tilted his head to the side thoughtfully and lifted a corner of his mouth while he considered what Daryl could possibly mean with his statement.

“But, you’re really into her? I mean, you’re not messing with anyone else?” He asked.

“Yeah, I’m into her” He confessed uncomfortably. “It’s just her. Everythin’ is…her.” He shrugged in an attempt to come off as if his words meant nothing. Aaron smiled knowingly.

“I know her. She won’t look at anyone else as long as you’re around. See? She’s your girl. You’ll get used to it. Trust me.” He grinned. 

*****

 

Lexie was reclined on the couch two days later as Mel painted her toenails for her. She had agreed to let her do it provided it was black they agreed on and not the neon pink Mel had initially suggested. She held her book above her and wriggled in her spot, trying to get comfortable while Mel gripped her toes tightly in her fingers.

“Keep still, dammit.” She hissed.

Lexie huffed and tried to concentrate on the paragraph she was reading. In Daryl’s absence, she had made no secret of the fact that she was worried about him being outside the walls and on overnight runs. Rick, Aaron, Michonne, Glenn and Abraham had all tagged along on the mission to retrieve weapons from what appeared to be an abandoned military convoy Sasha and Abraham had found on a scavenging run one day. They had been gone longer than expected and the only way Mel could stop Lexie from pointing a gun at Spencer again was to keep her inside the house and occupied. Finishing up painting her sisters’ toes, Mel sat back and surveyed her work, she pursed her lips and nodded.

“I missed my calling in life.” She mused.

She twisted the lid back onto the pot and threw it onto the coffee table, narrowing her eyes at the back of Lexie’s book. When the doorbell rang, she jumped up and held her palms out at Lexie, who was frozen, halfway off the couch with a look of urgency on her face.

“Ah, ah! Stay put! I’ll get it, calm down!” She scolded.

Lexie flopped back onto the couch, considering that their visitor could well be Eric, also seeking some kind of distraction from Aaron being out with the others as well. She could hear hushed conversation for a moment and thought nothing of it, opening her book back up and finding the place where she left off.

 

 

Daryl looked exhausted and Mel stepped out of the house, pulling the door almost closed behind her. His face and arms were covered in mud and blood and he had the metallic odour of gore, dirt, smoke and metal. His eye was blackened and his cheek grazed. Over his shoulder, she could see Rick and Michonne making their way along the path to their house in the evening light, they were both also donning a layer of dirt and crimson stains much like Daryl.

“Are you OK?” Mel asked, keeping her voice no louder than a whisper.

“Yeah, just tired.” He rasped. “Lexie in?”

“She is, but she’s been worried about you, maybe you should go home and get a shower first? You’ve taken a beating and you smell like a baboon’s ass.” She suggested.

Daryl exhaled and Mel could hear him growl with irritation in his throat as he tilted his head back and looked down his nose at her. Yes, he understood Mel’s need to protect Lexie but the reason he had driven through the gate, jumped out of the truck, spoken to Deanna briefly and then made his way straight to Lexie had now passed way beyond simply wanting to see her. He _needed_ to see her and he was extremely close to picking Mel up and removing her from his path himself.

“No offense, but im’ma toss ya aside like post-it unless ya let me in” He glowered at her.

She locked eyes with him for a few seconds, not wanting to buckle so easily, but his determination to see Lexie was tugging on her heartstrings so much, she eventually stepped aside and held the door open for him.

“Fine, but don’t touch anything. Including my sister.” She mumbled at him as he walked past.

 

 

Lexie’s eyes flickered from the page to the doorway, where Daryl stood like an exhausted warrior with his crossbow slung over his shoulder. She shot up and slammed her book down, throwing her legs from the couch and running across the thick rug to him, her freshly painted toenails collecting dust and fluff as she went. He stepped back as she approached.

“No…don’t.” He told her.

She stopped dead in her tracks and he didn’t think he had ever seen someone look so disappointed before. He saw her scan his appearance worriedly. He motioned to his clothes with his hands.

“Walker guts… n’ stuff. Best to stay away.” He explained.

“Oh” She squeaked. “You look hurt” She wrung her hands in front of her, wavering her weight from one leg to the other with anxiety and wanting so badly to fether her fingertips over his bruised eye and scratched cheek.

“Some bumps and scrapes. Nothin’ much.”

“Right, good. You haven’t been back to the house yet?” She asked.

“Naw. Saw Deanna and came straight here. Wanted to see ya, let ya know I was back.”

She smiled down at the floor and he detected her cheeks tint pink. She figured that this was typical Daryl, if he liked someone, he had his own way of making it obvious. At first, she had struggled to believe that his interest in her wasn’t temporary or because of who she looked like. But actions such as this had helped to confirm that his intentions were in fact, genuine. Now, she was lucky enough to see it in his eyes and feel it in his kiss.

“Alright. Im’ma go get a shower. See ya later maybe.”

He turned in the doorway to leave, pausing and looking over his shoulder

“Missed ya.” He uttered, his lips barely moving but she heard him perfectly. Her heart fluttered at the look in his eye. Despite the blood and dirt clinging to his skin, under the façade of the grumpy, angry redneck, he looked happy.

“I missed you too. If you want to. You could come back. I was just going to put some music on and draw.” She offered

He chewed on his lip and peered at her through the curtains of his dirty, long hair.

“Be back in around an hour.” He said before leaving the room.

 *****

When Daryl returned, Lexie was on the back perch twirling a pencil between her fingers while she watched him climb up and settle beside her. She couldn’t stop looking at him and found herself having to concentrate on the lines she had drawn on her sketchpad. It was all she could do to stop herself from staring at him all night. Birds flew overhead in a small flock and the air began to cool, prickling at her skin and raising the hairs on the back of her neck.

“There’s a storm comin’.” He grumbled.

She wondered how he was able to tell, putting it down to his natural survival instincts and his time spent on the outside, even before the turn. The sky and everything else felt the same to her. There was no different smells or any slight differences to usual save the rapid cooling of the air. She nodded in acknowledgement of his statement and briefly stole a glimpse of him sweeping her eyes over his clothing and now clean arms. She noted his bruised eye and scratched cheek but decided against mentioning them, knowing he would only brush it off as nothing anyway.

“You’re not covered in Walker guts anymore.” She observed as she shaded a section of the detailed tree sketch on the paper. “Can I touch you now?” She didn’t look up while she waited for an answer.

Daryl shifted closer to her and draped an arm around her shoulders, kissing the side of her head and remining there for a few seconds, breathing her in and watching her draw. He was more than aware that she had never allowed anyone to see her work let alone watch her create it and so he considered himself lucky to have been awarded such a privilege. As the minutes passed, Daryl revelled in the quiet. A stillness he had craved over the last two days when he had seen nothing but death and reanimated corpses. Usually able to adjust and push through, he could think of nothing but Lexie while he fought his way out of a clearing filled with Walkers, all the while keeping a close eye on the others in the group. He had considered all the things he had yet to tell her about Faith while he lay in the mud and concluded that he should do it sooner, rather than later.

“Lexie” He said, gaining her attention. She looked to the side at him. “There’s more you need to know about Faith.”

She offered him a small smile “So tell me.” She uttered as she slid a hand over his thigh.

“OK. She uh- she had another half-sister. Name was Hope. They had the same mom, different dads. She was twelve years younger than Faith.” He divulged.

Lexie’s eyes were wider and she was peering sideways at him with an intensity that he already anticipated might happen, he just couldn’t figure out what emotion was behind it.

“What happened to her?” She asked.

“She was with us when we first found the group. Few of the guys went off to Atlanta on a run one day, I went out huntin’. Camp was attacked. Most of the fightin’ force was out so a lot of folks died. Faith got bit protectin’ Hope. She was pregnant and scared and she just ran off into the woods. My brother tried to track her. They got along real well. He was out there for weeks lookin’ for her. I tried too but I was all fucked up from loosin’ Faith. Then, her trail just went cold. Like she just disappeared into thin air.”

“Do you think she’s still out there?” She pressed.

“I dunno. Maybe another group picked her up. Think about her sometimes, hope she’s alright, y’know? Her n’ the baby.” He expressed.

“Me too. What was she like?” Lexie enquired.

Daryl smirked at the memories he had of her. When he had first met Faith’s little sister, she had flirted mercilessly with him, much to Faith’s irritation but she had soon turned into a friend and someone he had grown to care about.

“She was loud, funny...kinda annoyin’ at times, cared a lot about her sister. Guess, she was pretty much a younger version of Mel.”

Lexie giggled at the thought of there being two versions of Mel in the world. One was almost too much to handle.

“She sounds like a loveable pain in the ass.” She grinned. “What else can you tell me about Faith?”

Daryl stiffened, realising that the next snippet of information was likely to stun her even more. He had no idea how to break the news, so decided to try and be as direct and clear as possible.

“Her and Hope, their grandmother on their mom’s side, she owned a chain of hotels all across the world. It was real successful but eventually, she sold it and when she died, Faith and Hope inherited all the money. Hope, she couldn’t have hers until she turned 21 but Faith, she got Death Gratuity when her husband died and she had savings, so when she got her money, she gave a lot of it away to a charity. Then, she bought a big ass house and half of the bar I pretty much grew up in. She wasn’t an asshole about it though, she spent a lot of it on other folks to help ‘em out”

Lexie was on tenterhooks, her face frozen into a curious expression.

“How much money are we talking here?” She wanted to know.

“Uh…She got 3.2 million. Hope got the same” He said.

She gasped and her hand lifted to her face, covering her open mouth. He had known this would come as a shock to her but it did little to aid him in knowing how to handle it.

“My sister was a _millionaire_?” She whispered

“Yeah. I didn’t know at first. When I met her, she lived next to a crack whore.” He huffed. “She was renovatin’ the house.”

“The house you lived in with her?”

“Yeah, moved in a few weeks before the turn.”

“Jesus. That’s…that’s quite the bombshell.” She sighed, feeling his arm tighten around her shoulders, she leaned into him, allowing him to take her weight and approving of the sensation of him kissing the top of her head tenderly. She would need time to let it all sink in again, to piece it all together but this time, she was going to do it with Daryl by her side. She didn’t think of the what if’s, the what could have been’s. Instead, she thought of the opportunities that Faith must have provided people, the life she had given Daryl before the turn and she was proud, proud of a sister she had never even known existed.

She jumped when a raindrop splattered onto the page, making a quick thud and picking up grey tones of the image as it dribbled and was soon followed by several others. Hauling herself to her feet, she began to scramble around, picking up her belongings and throwing them onto a blanket. She scooped it up and ran inside while Daryl collected the cushions and followed close behind.

Inside, she dumped everything on the floor and took the cushions from Daryl, making a pile of discarded items that were dampened and the least of her worries at that moment. His stare penetrated her soul and with every movement she made she could sense him watching her, making no effort to hide it. Something behind her eyes, deep in her mind made her want to smile at the thought. The knowledge that he didn’t want to drag his vision away from her, that he wanted to observe her as she moved about the room, dropping a CD into the player and pressing ‘play’, lighting candles and clearing her bed of clutter.

“Make yourself comfortable.” She murmured while she tugged the elastic from her hair which had been twisted up into a bun, emphasising the waves in the strands. It shimmered in the flickering light like caramel and to Daryl, she seemed to be moving in slow motion. He settled on the bed, using one arm to reach behind his head and scrunch up the pillow, rising his head slightly so he could still see her. She tugged at the zipper on her black sweater but it was stuck fast, so crossed her arms in front of her, taking hold of the hem and hoisted it over her head, the curve of her waist silhouetted against the candles.

Daryl could still feel the clammy parts of his clothing from the rain but paid them no mind, telling himself that they would dry in the next few minutes and so he didn’t feel the need to shed any layers like Lexie. Resting both arms above his head, he let out a loud exhalation that had caught her attention and she threw a wink his way over her shoulder before plucking a pair of thin, baggy lounge pants from the drawer in front of her and vanishing into the bathroom.

When she returned, Daryl noted her choice of clothing. Noticeably thinner clothing. Nightwear.

_Look away. Don’t stare_

He turned his vision to the wall opposite, studying the posters and quotes. Edgar Allen Poe, Franz Kafka, John Fowles, William Burroughs. A bountiful collection of writers he had only heard of through his conversations with Lexie. Able to hold his attention, she provided him with a kind of education that no one else could. As she wordlessly climbed onto the bed next to him, he considered what these quiet moments with her meant to him. Sometimes he thought about Faith, but mostly he thought about Lexie and how she made him happy with every smile, every laugh and how she just always seemed to content to be near him.

She turned her body to face him and studied the side of his face. His older, slightly more worn skin, his shabby and unkempt beard and his long, dark brown hair. She admired the rippled landscape of his arms drawn up under his head, his small tattoos dotted around his skin, holding their own stories that she was yet to discover. She had already known the feeling of their first kiss. An unforgettable, exciting and precious first moment that hadn’t seemed to have ended yet. She wanted more. She reached out a hand, gently pushing his hair back from his face, her fingertips grazing across his scratched cheekbone. He turned and looked at her, his eyes bright blue in the light.

“Can I kiss you?” She whispered

A small smile breezed across his face and she could see it was tinged with slight disbelief.

“Ya ain’t gotta ask.” He replied.

“Kind of out of the blue. I didn’t know if you wanted to.” She confessed, biting her bottom lip bashfully.

“Think I mighta proved I’m good with that.” He considered.

“Good point” She agreed, remembering the kitchen of the Artist’s house and how impressed she had been with his gusto, how he had manhandled her against the side of a house in the dark as she did a perimeter check just for a series of secret kisses and how he had visited the armoury before leaving Alexandria to steal a short but passionate kiss with her. Returning his smile, she gradually leaned closer to him. He helped her by rolling onto his side and moving nearer himself and felt every cell in his body hum with desire as she gently pressed her lips to his. He returned the kiss, pushing a little bit harder and feeling her respond accordingly until he found himself slipping his tongue between her lips as she shifted even closer. She threaded a hand up and over his chest until she met the side of his neck and he felt her subtly pulling him to her. His own hand gingerly rested on the curve of her waist, apprehensive of venturing anywhere else.

His breathing had changed. It was becoming rapid and shallow and every nerve in him was being set alight, spurred on even further when she released a soft, content moan.

 _Was that for me? Did I do that?_ He thought.

She lifted a leg and hooked it over his thigh, pressing herself into him. Wanting to feel more of her, he allowed his hand to gradually move to the small of her back, which he used to push her into him. She moaned again in response as she continued to kiss him, becoming more and more urgent with each breath.

_Yeah, that was for me._

Lexie was melting into him, wishing she was bold enough to just climb on top of him, but even this was a milestone to her. She slowly pulled back, her lips leaving his and their breathing matching. She looked up into his hazy eyes and saw him still, his jaw tightening. For a split second, she thought she’d pushed too much or done something wrong. Then, she noticed the heat and pressure that was building up against her thigh. Daryl pulled back slightly, his erection straining against the inside of his jeans.

 _Fuck._ He thought as his ears began to go a dark shade of pink.

Sensing his discomfort, she raised an eyebrow at him and flashed him a mischievous smile. He emitted a short, breathy and uncomfortable giggle and she thought she might die at the sight of how shy he seemed to be.

“Your fault.” He whispered.

"I’m OK with that.” She grinned. 

She leaned to him again, resuming their kiss and Daryl took it as a sign that she was probably willing to take things a little further. He slipped his fingers under her top, tickling across her spine. She arched her back at the sensation which caused both of them to smile into their kiss. She moved closer still, her torso lifting over him and he lay back on the pillow as her hair fell down over him, creating a curtain of soft, brown waves. Now, he could use both hands, running them under her top up either side of her waist and over her ribs, stopping precariously below her bra. He let go with one hand and hooked it over the leg she had halfway across his lap. He gently tugged on it, telling her he wanted her on top of him. She was gasping between kisses, as was he while he tried to touch more and more of her. She shifted back, getting comfortable over his pelvis and moaning at the sensation of his hardness underneath her.

 _Do I push this further?_ Daryl considered. _I want her. But is this too soon?_

She slowly ground her hips down into him. Just once, but it was enough for him to notice the warm, dampened delight through her shorts.

_Shit. I really fucking want her._

His hand resumed its previous place on her ribs below her bra which somehow felt slightly hasty. Choosing not to shove his fingers under the wire and across her silky skin, he dragged them further up, over her top and instead felt the glorious shape of her through her clothing. Wanting more, a different piece of her to explore, he smoothed his palms along her thighs. She sucked in a sharp breath at this move and her lips left his. She panted over him, her thumb grazing across his cheek and her eyes brimming with lust. He could tell she was trying to say something.

“Want me to stop?” He breathed, trying to catch his breath from what was a brief but intense encounter.

She nodded.

“Alright” He accepted straight away, lifting his hands from her legs.

Her lips were parted and glistening in the candlelight that peeled through her hair and her expression had changed, she was suddenly distant.

“You OK?” He probed.

She sat back, her top still rolled up to her bra and her hands coming up to her face. She rubbed her eyes and ran her fingers through her hair while Daryl revelled in the sight of her above him, with her toned stomach exposed and the tempting peek of the top of one breast under the neckline of her clothing. He couldn’t help it, his eyebrow raised subtly and he licked his lips. She was a tantalising and inviting picture. She suddenly dropped her hands and laced her fingers into his.

“My scars” She uttered.

Daryl understood straight away and sat up, shrugging off his leather vest and unbuttoning his shirt. Lexie sat frozen at the side of his thigh, having moved over to one side of him to allow him more room. When he reached the bottom buttons on his shirt, he paused and looked up at her, seeing her wary but curious eyes. He had never done this without being asked before and only with one other person, Faith.

He took a deep breath and removed his sleeveless, black shirt from his broad shoulders. The tiny ‘X’ tattoo on his collarbone was the first thing Lexie noticed and she made a mental note to ask about it one day, but now wasn’t the time. She was aware of how scared and uneasy she probably looked, having not expected to be in this situation at all. Daryl gestured over his shoulder with his head.

“Take a look.” He mumbled.

Inch by inch, she crawled around him until she was sat on her knees facing his side. Her eyes journeyed over his collarbone, to his shoulder blade, spotting his previous stab wound. Her breath hitched and she fought with all her might to stop the emotion that had risen in her chest from forming tears in her eyes. Raised, large gashes. Pink, shiny surfaces. Crisscrossed and perfectly straight. He wore his scars as a secret key to his past. She gently positioned a hand on his shoulder and he hung his head, his hair obscuring his face and she knew what he was feeling because it was the same as her. He was ashamed. But his shame hadn’t been greater than his desire to set her mind at ease. He had shown her that she wasn’t alone, that he too was branded with the marks of a survivor and had been long before the turn. Lexie leaned her forehead on his shoulder and closed her eyes.

“I’m so sorry that happened to you.” She whispered.

He gently turned and brushed her hair from her face and over her shoulder. Confident his gesture had worked and gone some way to quelling her worries about revealing her own marks, he shifted back further and met her eye.

“We all got scars in some way.” He whispered while he lightly traced her jawline with his thumb and brought her back to him, kissing her dark pink lips and noticing her hold onto his shoulders. He moved her back, her legs unfurling as her head sank into the pillow under her. She found a hand on her waist and covered it with her own, picking it and manoeuvring it to the waistband of her pants. Daryl’s body was thundering with lust once more, especially when he realised what she was trying to tell him by pushing his index finger between the elastic of her waistband and her underwear. His kiss travelled from her lips, across her cheek and down to her neck while she laced her fingers into his hair.

“You sure?” He gasped quickly.

“Yes” She uttered.

When he tugged on her pants, he suddenly realised how nervous he was. His skin prickled with anxiety as he moved one side down before sliding across to the other side, revealing her hips. She reached down, aiding him with his task and bending a leg, stopping just before her thigh became exposed. Daryl stopped kissing her, leaning back and looking down at her face before shifting his gaze down to her leg. Gradually, he inched her pants leg further and further over her thigh. Straight, white scars emerged on her skin like thatch work, angrily slashing one across the other over and over. As the other leg moved down with it, he could see that both had suffered the consequences of her despair. Lexie was closely studying his reaction, which so far had been nowhere near as horrified or disgusted as she would have expected. In fact, he hadn’t reacted at all. He looked back up at her and met her eyes while he ran his fingers over her scars with intent. No feather light touch or gentle caress, more a pressured and deliberate stroke that Lexie was unable to get away from. She was entranced, captivated by his ability to calm and assure her. To convince her to let him touch her and to trust him with something that was still so raw and personal.

“They’re ugly” She breathed, her voice catching in her throat.

“No” He replied. “Nothin’ on you is ugly.”

It was a repeat of an earlier interaction, back at the Artists house when they had spent their first night in the same bed. She had believed what he had said, that in his eyes they were not ugly. But to her, they always would be. He silenced her thoughts when he kissed her again, this time with more urgency, nipping at her bottom lip all the while wrenching her pants from her legs, discarding them and feeling his way back up her leg, over her knee, along her thigh and stopping further up, his thumb rubbing the edge of her panties at her hip.

“You’re fuckin’ beautiful.” He panted between delicious kisses. Lexie couldn’t help but smile. It had been an aggressively sexy compliment and just what she wanted to hear at that moment. Like he had read her mind or could simply hear her every thought.

Daryl figured he must have been hiding his nerves well enough for her not to have picked up on the fact that his hands were trembling slightly and his heart was beating so fast and so intently in his chest he thought she might be able to hear it for herself. His body was hot, his forehead already slick with sweat and once he’d got rid of her pants, he was now at an impasse with himself. Should he keep going? Is that what she would want? Should he ask? Questions rattled around his mind but he continued to kiss her, working over her neck and slipping her strap down her shoulder but holding onto the fabric between his fingers.

_I want this gone. I want this gone. I want this gone._

A stab of panic shot through him when she reached between them and drew the tank top up over her stomach and chest. For a split second, he worried he’d said it out loud. She sat up slightly so she was able to hoist it over her head and throw it on the floor beside the bed. His heart settled a little, but nerves still fuelled it’s heavy drumming and he fought to touch her with steady hands. Her black bra flattered the shape of her chest, even as she lay on her back and it took everything in Daryl not to dive right in and drag it down with his teeth. A move too bold to even consider in his current state.

“It’s ok.” She stated.

_Shit. She can tell._

He nibbled his bottom lip and nodded shyly at her under him. For the both of them, it was a first-time experience that neither of them wanted to mess up. Lexie was nervous too, but her anxieties had been more or less centred around his reaction to her scars, which had proved to be better than she had ever imaged and now she was left with a choice. Should she take the lead here, or not?

She reached down with one hand, finding the bulge in his jeans and applying enough pressure to make him jolt as she rubbed though his clothes. His hand had now paused on her chest and while his tongue danced with hers, she allowed him to caress the soft, tender flesh of a breast when his fingers pushed inside the cup. She shuddered when his fingertip lightly grazed over her nipple and the nerve endings between her legs were set alight.

Daryl hadn’t felt the touch of a woman in over a year and it hadn’t been something he could say he ever thought about after losing Faith. That was, until her half sister showed up with her athletic figure and pretty brown eyes. Now, he struggled to think of much else when he was with her and had initially hated himself for it and pushed it to the back of his mind. But while she writhed under him and hardened him as she toyed with his erection, he had to admit that he couldn’t really blame himself for wanting her so intensely.

She moved her hand up, meeting his belt and teased the leather from the buckle. Thousands of worries and anxieties flashed through his mind like a million tv’s all on different channels. Then he heard her tug his zipper down and felt her push his jeans from his hips.

 _We’re really going to do this._ He thought.

His lips left hers and her peered down at her in his lustful haze. Her cheeks were flushed pink slightly and her eyes determined, one of her hands was now closed over him again, the sensation all the more pleasurable with only the thin fabric of his boxers in the way. He slid her bra strap down, briefly meeting her eye as if asking permission. She smiled up at him and raised her torso from the bed, his hand slipped around to her back, unclipping the bras clasp and he held his breath for a few seconds when the garment dropped away from her front. He experienced a subtle, uncontrollable tremble in his body when she lay back down and he lowered himself onto her.

“You’re so nervous” she whispered sympathetically as she stroked the side of his face.

“Sorry” he apologised, sighing deeply and resting his forehead on hers.

“Daryl, I’m right here with you. On the same page.” She told him.

There it was. Confirmation. It was happening.


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi All!  
> Apologies for the delay with this chapter. I've had the most stressful week EVER and things have just started to settle down. I also found this super tricky to write because of how I wanted these two to be with each other in this most important of situations. I tried to find a balance of fun, sex and emotion without using graphic descriptions and too much 'motion talk'. So, hopefully, I've managed it.  
> It's not the longest of chapters, but it is necessary that some chapters are shorter than others to separate the different parts of the story. This is super fluffy for those of you that like to die from fluff! ; )

 

 _It'll all be better in the morning_  
'Cause while you sleep I'll build a wall  
Pick a weapon up or something  
We're 'bout to have ourselves a brawl  
In the dead of night, one window open  
He heard her singing down the hall  
Singing 'bout him, least he was hoping  
She left her listener enthralled

_-Dermot Kennedy, After Rain._

 

“I’m nervous too.” She assured him.

His lips connected with her nose, where he placed a sweet, light kiss before moving to her cheekbone and back to her lips. Her reassurance had encouraged him, changed something in him and his nerves had also served to calm her, the knowledge that he was as nervous as she was helping to spur her on. Her body jolted with pleasure when he grazed the inside of his thumb over her nipple again, the rest of her breast tenderly caressed by his rough hand, weathered by the outdoors and hardened by his life but still impossibly gentle when he touched her.

He hooked a finger into the side of her underwear and dragged it down, his lips leaving hers so he could see what he was doing and to make sure he could marvel at the sight. She lifted her hips and allowed him to move the black cotton down, threading it over her knees and smoothing it down her calves to her feet.

Her heart was racing, fluttering like a hummingbird trapped in her chest when he moved back over her and felt along the curves of her body, slowly, deliberately, palming every inch and savouring every moment while still leaving tender, delicate kisses on her lips.

Daryl was beginning to relax, the silky sensation of her skin under his palm was something he hadn’t realised he had missed so much, the touch of a female, in this way, filled with nothing but desire for him. It was a thought that he still couldn’t make sense of, how he could provoke such want from another person, but not just anyone, from her. Lexie. Her happy moans drifted through the room and he bit his bottom lip at her reaction to him bravely stepping things up to the next level and gently pushing two fingers inside her.

Back arched and fingertips digging into his shoulder blade, a loud gasp and a gratified smile was followed by an endeavour to say something; a mere whisper between breaths that was soon silenced by a rough and sensual kiss. She dragged her nails down his back, over his scars and met the elastic of his underwear. She linked them underneath, a small movement but he knew what she wanted. He reached down and helped her slide them down over his hips, freeing himself so she could take hold of him and all the while ignoring the bundle of nerves that churned in his stomach. Lexie nudged at his face with her nose, encouraging yet more kisses while she stroked and caressed him.

_I won’t let you get away with making this all about me, Daryl. You are here too._

He pushed inside her again, using his thumb to trace delectably slow, small circles outside and he loved how with each stroke, she seemed to cling to him and angle her hips up to signal that she did not want him to stop.

Her core was radiating now, like a fire pit ready to rage with intensity and the flames only grew higher every time she felt him pulse in her hand and release a hitched breath from his throat.

It was just right. Just the right spot inside her that his fingertips stroked over, repeatedly and she wondered if he knew it or if it was nothing more than a happy accident. She was edging closer and closer to the precipice, moaning against his lips, his open mouth now gasping from his own pleasure. It hadn’t been long, but his back was becoming slick with sweat and he knew he had to have her soon or he wouldn’t be able to hold on. He was going to withdraw his hand when she suddenly gripped his wrist like a vice and he saw her chest turn red in a matter of a split second while her muscles closed tightly around his fingers and she held her breath. When she released it, it was jagged and shaky and Daryl peered down at her, waiting for her to open her eyes.

Her entire body from her head to her toes was wracked by an exquisite and intense wave of sparkling relief that made her head spin and when she saw Daryl watching over her, licking his lips as if she were some kind of tasty treat, she grinned and felt her cheeks burn red.

“Um…did you just…?” He asked

She nodded, turning her head to the side and hiding against his arm, a small giggle escaping her. He swooped down to her still subtly twitching body as his index finger grazed over the sensitive, post-orgasm flesh between her legs and he lightly kissed along her jawline to her ear.

“That was awesome to watch” He whispered to her. “You want me to stop?”

“No” She answered straight away.

He moved back when he felt her wriggle under him, drawing herself up higher and placing her hands on his biceps. She encouraged him to one side.

“Lay back” She told him.

With his eyebrow raised and a look of pleasant surprise on his face, he did as he was told and lay on his back. She climbed on top of him, positioning herself right on top of his erection which had momentarily added to the building pressure before providing him with a hint of relief that he knew was going to be short lived.  

Her shape, her glowing skin and her messy, wavy hair was all at once a glorious vision and a dangerous thought to him. She had become his crutch, his weakness and his rock and she was straddling him, naked, vulnerable and exposed and looking at him with eyes filled with an unmitigated trust in him.

“Hell of a view” He said, the corner of his mouth quirking up into a smile.

Lexie knew this position was bold of her, but she also knew he would enjoy every second and wanted to make this first time with her an unforgettable one. A self-assurance she never knew she had was now at the wheel due to her wanting to please him and his reaction had more than satisfied her. She sat up higher, lining him up with her and slowly eased him inside, stopping briefly when his eyes flickered closed and then open again, his chest rose and fell and she knew he needed a minute to adjust. As did she, when everything between her legs began to pulse with a tantalising and addictive warmth.

“Uh, shit” She heard him cuss under his breath at the same time he clamped his hands over her thighs, her scars now nothing but a distant memory to both of them.

Once she had adjusted and Daryl had begun to explore her body with his hands, she kept her rhythm at a leisurely and unassuming pace with the intention of prolonging the experience for as long as they both could handle.

Daryl found himself with a feverish need to touch every inch of her, to make sure she was real, that all of it was real and not some kind of elaborate and vivid dream he was having while laying in his room asleep or in the woods somewhere. But she was real and even better, she was his.

His hands journeyed up her thighs, over her stomach and up to her breasts and she reached up and held them to her as she moved. The candlelight flickered through the strands of her hair and illuminated the outline of her waist. One hand kept going, up to her face, a fingertip hooking gently onto her bottom lip and tracing a lingering line from side to the other. She moaned blissfully and tilted her head back, Daryl’s finger drawing down her chin and throat, back to its origin on her left breast.

When he felt himself toeing the line already, his veins coursing with the need for release, he had no choice but to avert his gaze and think of something else. Lexie noticed him pull an arm away and drape it over his eyes, his teeth almost bared. She leaned down to him, slowing to a near halt and kissed over his chest until she reached his face. His eyes were darkened somehow, like he had never looked at her that way before, with such a ravenous need, but she liked it and she expected she would want to see it more often.

“You OK?” She asked.

“Yeah…just…” He panted.

“You need a sec?” She suggested.

“Yeah”

“OK” She smiled, kissing him softly while gently and slowly squeezing herself around him. Unable to resist, he groaned quietly at her mischievous and intentional toying as he tried to compose himself. She took hold of his hands, slipped them around her waist and sat back again.

“Come here” She instructed.

Dutifully, he hauled himself up from the bed and enveloped her in his arms, looking up at her big, brown eyes. She unfurled her legs either side of him and squeezed him again, using her femininity and natural advantage to tease him. She watched him squirm against her, the beads of sweat on his forehead now visible and dampening his hairline. Brown strands stuck to his face and she brushed them away so she could look at him, really see him. He shuddered suddenly and his teeth clamped down on his lip.

“Lex…uh, fuck…ya gotta stop doin’ that or im’ma come right now.” He warned. 

She giggled down at him, nuzzling into his face.

“Tease.” He huffed, breaking into a smile all the while Lexie was rubbing her nose on his and kissing over his cheeks and forehead. She giggled and left loving, little touches of her over a face she had ended up wanting to see more than anyone else’s.

“Sorry.” She uttered. But he knew she wasn’t sorry. Not one, little bit.

His hips moved under her, pushing himself up and into her further and she tilted her pelvis to meet him, once, twice and then over and over again, soon building a perfectly matched sequence.

He was gasping, with one arm hooked around her and firmly held against her spine, it wasn’t just stability it provided him with, it was the need for closeness. She was pinned against him, her arms wrapped around his shoulders and his face pushed into her chest, sucking in breaths against her perspiration-soaked skin. She was getting louder and louder with each thrust, her moans soon morphing into subtle growls and he could sense her closing in around him.

“Shh” He hushed with a small chuckle, worried that Mel might be able to hear them.

She glimpsed down at him, her face etched with a kind of happy, breezy and breathless expression. She smiled widely as she continued with their pace.

“She can’t hear us.” She assured him.

She could see he was trying to say something else but he was hesitating, trying to read her body’s signals and concentrating intently. She sighed happily when he kissed and lightly licked the supple, fleshy top of her breast before being taken completely off guard when he leaned back and braced himself with an elbow on the mattress behind him. Her eyes darted around for a few seconds while she figured out what he wanted from her, but a slight tap on her knee and a tug towards him on her arm told her that she should get back into her previous position. She bent her legs and watched him scan her body with his jaw pulled tight, veins protruding in his neck and forearms and a slight shake of his head. It was a show of disbelief, that he was so impressed by her he couldn’t fathom how he had got to this point.

“Sure she can’t hear us?” He asked.

“Positive.” She smiled.

“Good” He nodded, slapping a hand on her ass and pulling her up slightly before thrusting into her with a greater speed and strength than before. Her eyes widened and she blinked rapidly, her breath hitching from both the shock and the insurmountable amount of pleasure that was welling all around the most intimate and sensitive parts of her. She didn’t bother to stifle her cries, nor did she try to stop clawing at his bicep as he held her aloft over his hips.

Daryl had no idea how he’d managed to last as long as he had after having no semblance of sexual contact with anyone for well over a year. He suspected it was the sensual way she coaxed him and her unrushed and patient approach. But now, he was careering towards the end and knew he wouldn’t be able to stop himself.

“Hey” He rasped at her.

She lifted her arm and gathered her hair, removing it from her view of him as he continued to hit into her. But her eyes were closed and her mouth hung open.

“Look at me” He ordered through laboured breaths.

Finally, she opened her eyes and looked right at him.

“Come for me.” He ordered, his hand moving to between her legs. To Lexie, it was like a switch, as soon as his thumb brushed against its destination, up the switch went and higher that familiar inferno raged. Her veins were fire and he was the fuel. With every deep, circled motion and every sharp push inside her she was closer and closer still until she couldn’t hold it back anymore. Her body rippled above him and she released a throaty and shaky growl.

 _That’s what I’m talkin’ about. What a fuckin’ sight._ He thought.

It was enough, it was more than enough. He could literally see her orgasm travel through all the different parts of her, the hairs on her arms stood up, her nipples hardened, her stomach tensed and her chest was the same deepened shade of pink it had gone before. He let go, his own release thundering through him and having near enough the same results. He snatched up her hand and yanked her down to him, pinning her to his torso and shoving his fingers into her hair while his muscles twitched and shook in an almost parallel way to hers. His chest heaved as he fought to catch his breath, the tension being expelled in a series of quiet grunts and he could already sense Lexie smiling against the side of his face.

She shuffled down onto the bed beside him, one leg remaining draped over him. While she waited for his breathing to calm, she reached down to the bottom of the bed, unfolding a blanket that was being used as a throw and lifted it up and over them before settling down on her side, facing him. He was staring at the ceiling, his hair once again clinging to his forehead and cheeks. She lifted a hand and plucked some strands away for him, sweeping the rest to one side. He still hadn’t even looked at her.

Inside his mind, Daryl was replaying the image he’d just witnessed over and over again and figured it was safe to say it was one of the best things he had ever seen in his life. That was, along with a couple of other experiences from the past that he didn’t like to link to this. Just for a few minutes, he revelled in his elation at the connection they appeared to share without even really having to try too hard. She had shown him a different side to her, a side that was not only obviously comfortable with him but also a side that was mischievous and playful in intimate situations. He had also been awarded the prize of being able to see all of her, the uncensored version and he was well aware he would never be able to find the right words to explain to her how breath-taking she was to him.

He turned his head to her and found her silently tickling over his collarbone with a finger, a motion he hadn’t even noticed.

“You alright?” He asked.

Her eyes flickered up to him and a wide grin emerged on her face along with the escape of a flirtatious giggle.

“What’s funny?” He smiled.

“Nothing, nothing.” She beamed. “It’s just…twice.”

“Oh” he smirked “You complainin’?”

“Well, no. But you could have gone for a third if you ask me.” She jested.

When his hands found her waist and tickled her under the cover of the blanket, she shrieked and giggled with delight as he drew her closer to his body and silenced her with a short kiss.

“Lucky ya even got that, was so damn nervous.” He confessed.

Lexie appreciated his honesty and felt a sense of achievement that he had volunteered his feelings without her having to ask.

“Daryl, I was so nervous I wasn’t expecting one, let alone two.” She told him. “You know what you’re doing.”

“Naw, just helps that ya beautiful” He uttered, nudging her nose with his and stealing another kiss from her smiling lips.

Affection wasn’t something that had come easily to Daryl and Faith had taught him the value of it and shown him just how much he needed it. Since her death, he hadn’t wanted to even touch another living soul let alone find himself in bed with someone. But as he lay there with Lexie in his arms, he found that there wasn’t doubt in his mind that that was exactly where he belonged and it occurred to him just how much everything had now changed. She snaked an arm around him, smoothing up and down his back and studying his blue eyes.

“You’re prefect to me. I’m very lucky.” She whispered.

“So am I.” He replied.

She snuggled into him, closing her eyes and sighing deeply. As he lay there, staring at the dusty and cracked ceiling of a house that was never his, never Lexie’s, belonging to some other family that would never have a thought such a connection would become evident under their roof, his mind became quiet and his bones relaxed and somehow, someway, he’d found a kind of peace that he had been searching for. She was it. She was his peace. She calmed his chaos and sat beside him during the storms, never expecting him to be anything other than himself. For the second time in his life, he had been blessed with another soul that fit together with the shattered pieces of his own.

Lexie’s breathing changed, becoming deep and slow. She had drifted off to sleep while he had been wrapped up in his thoughts. Her body was now heavy against him and he glanced down at her just as the candle in the corner of the room flickered and went out. The words were so quiet, he was almost convinced he’d thought them and not said them aloud, but they hesitantly emerged to form a sentence he had not said in a very long time.

“I think I love you.”

 *****

 

When morning broke, Lexie opened her heavy eyes, blinking away her blurred vision and wondering where the hell she was for the first few seconds. Then it hit her. She was in her room, in her bed and she had finally slept with Daryl for the first time. It had been incredible, everything she had hoped for and more and something that she would forever hold in her heart as the most precious night of her life.She had slept so deeply she didn’t even recall turning over in the night and ending up facing away from him. Hearing the clink of a belt buckle, her heart jumped and she rolled over.

_He’s leaving._

She tried not to look disappointed, instead offering him a small wink when he made eye contact. He winked back and threw on his leather vest before sitting in the chair in the corner or the room and pulling on his boots.

“I gotta head out and meet Aaron. Going out for a couple days” he said as he tied the laces around his ankles to stop Walkers from getting to the flesh of his leg under his clothing.

She sat up in the bed, hugging her knees. Her back was bare due to her lack of clothing from the night before, it felt cold and exposed save for the part her hair covered.  

“Ok.” She said, immediately worrying that a couple of days could turn into two weeks again.

“See ya when I get back?” He asked.

“Yeah. Be careful.” She replied.

Instead of leaving the room, his feet wouldn’t seem to budge and he found himself glued to the spot, witnessing how small and sad she looked in her big, empty bed without him. He sighed and nibbled on his thumb as they both stared at one another. He really, really didn’t want to leave her.

“Look, I don’t want ya to think I’m bailin’ on ya.” He admitted “I aint.”

“I know, it’s ok.” She nodded.

She knew he wasn’t, but it still felt like he was anyway. She had wanted to talk to him, she had specific things to say that would now have to wait.

He grumbled in frustration before he suddenly charged to the door with intent. She followed him with her eyes when he reached for the handle and paused, his eyes lowered to the floor between his feet.

“Fuck” She heard him spit angrily.

Suddenly, he doubled back, shocking her by climbing over the bed and kissing her passionately. She moaned and leaned back, using one arm to stop herself from falling backwards. She heard him growl subtly in his throat as he repositioned himself for better access to her and gently pushed her back again, his lips frantically kissing over hers. She bent her arm and lowered herself back into the mattress. She knew he had to leave but she wasn’t about to stop him. He crawled over her, his hand smoothing down her naked side, over her curves and stopping at her thigh. The blanket she was holding around her body was tugged away, exposing her chest to him. She found the hem of his shirt with her fingertips and they crept underneath, tickling along his waistband. His placed his forearm above her head on the pillow. Her body hummed with pleasure, tingling all over and she wished she could wrap her arms around him and keep him here with her.

His lips moved from hers and he began tenderly kissing and licking at her neck and before long he was at her chest, devouring her all over again. Out of the blue, he tore himself away and pushed himself up over her panting wildly and having to look away for a moment. Lexie couldn’t believe she was able to instil any passion in anyone, let alone this much. Breathlessly, his eyes crept back to her and he glared down at her, his lips shiny and parted and his breathing deep.

“God damn” He muttered under his breath.

He was looking at her with an immense hunger that was even more evident when he kissed her once more, this time nipping at her bottom lip and travelling around to her neck, where he brought her soft skin between his teeth and sucked hard until she bucked beneath him.

“S-stay” She managed to stammer.

He moved back again and Lexie shyly pulled the blanket over her and sat up, crossing her legs under the cover. He shook his head at his own lack of control while he shuffled back and sat on the edge of the bed. Trying to regain at least an ounce of composure, his breaths were still rapid and she could see his shoulders moving with every exhalation. He attempted to avert his mind, to think of something other than Lexie’s lightly freckled chest, her silky skin and her toned and shapely legs. He was tempted to just be late for the run, to slip back into bed with her and repeat the previous night all over again. But as his erection raged in his pants, he knew he had to leave or he would give in to it entirely.

“I gotta go.” He sighed.

“I know.” She assured him.

He looked over his shoulder at her.  

“Lexie…I don’t want to.” He sighed.  

She smiled and motioned to the door with a flick of her head. “Go” she urged.

He reached out to her and tucked a piece of wavy hair behind her shoulder, running his thumb lightly along her jawline.

“Really enjoyed last night.” He said “all of it”

“Me too.” She agreed.

“Alright, I’ll see ya in a couple days.” Finally, he got up and opened the door.

“Be safe” she called out. He paused, nodded at her once over his shoulder and left the room.

Lexie shuffled back until her shoulders hit the headboard and drew her legs up, burying her face in her hands, on top of her knees. For a while, she stayed there in the silence, in her empty bed in an empty room hoping that Daryl would return alive and in one piece so she could talk to him, express to him the thoughts that had been circulating in her mind since the night before. She wanted to tell him. She needed to tell him.

_I heard you. I heard what you said._


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New chapter! YAY!

Wind rushed through the canopy of trees above them but the sun was still hot enough to mean the day was sticky and hot and traipsing through the woods was proving to be a tedious and fruitless task. They were looking for old camps and any signs of life that may lead them to other survivors and Daryl was surging ahead in an attempt to avoid any probing questions from Aaron that he knew he would have to face at some point.

Aaron’s insistence on small talk had irritated him at first and he would bark back short, curt answers that did little to satisfy Aaron’s need for conversation. But as time had progressed, so had their relationship and they were now able to work together as an effective twosome. Aaron was calm and logical while Daryl was the director and decision maker. On occasion Daryl actually found chatting to be less strenuous than he had first realised but as his boots crunched through the dried leaves and he pushed branches out of the way, he was well aware that Aaron’s choice of topic on that day would involve Lexie.

“I know you don’t want to talk about it. But I’m still going to ask how things are going between you and Lexie.” Aaron mentioned from beside him.

There it was, just as Daryl had expected. But instead of feeling irritation at being made to talk about his relationship with Lexie, for the first time he felt an unexpected flutter of pride. Aaron was surprised to find him glancing to his side with a hint of a smile.

“S’good.” He grunted “she’s amazin’.”

“Wow, can’t believe I actually got an answer to that one.” Aaron chuckled as he shoved a large branch from his path and paused briefly to kick a discarded piece of clothing along the floor of the woodland, finding it covered with congealed blood and likely to belong to a walker rather than a living human.

“I just know ya ain’t gonna quit yabberin’ if I don’t answer.” Daryl jibed.

A snap in the distance meant they both halted and Daryl held up a hand, signalling for Aaron to remain perfectly still. The breeze and his own blood rushing through his head were all Aaron could hear while he waited for Daryl to give him the go ahead to keep moving. When his permission came, he guessed the noise was nothing more than a bird and released a loud breath and carried on along his path.

“Well, she’s definitely brighter since you’ve been in her life. Despite the whole sister bombshell. It’s nice to see her happy.” He expressed, noticing Daryl nibbling on his bottom lip as he walked.

“Ya think she is? Happy?” Daryl enquired, figuring if anyone was going to know it would be her best friend.

“Oh, Sure.” Aaron replied with enthusiasm. “Eric and I, we don’t see her as much anymore because she’s spending time with you but that’s fine with us. She’s talking more these days and she actually smiles. She cares about you.”

“Care ‘bout her too.” Daryl mumbled straight away. “Have done for a while.”

“I know.” Aaron quipped with a sly grin. Because he did know. He’d seen it from the moment Daryl first saw Lexie on the front lawn of her house where awkward greetings and introductions were made, something in Daryl’s eyes changed when he looked at her for the first time and ever since then he’d hidden it, ignored it and finally, embraced it.

“Yeah. Damn village gossip knows everything.” Daryl remarked with a huff.

“You finally admitted she’s your girl yet?” Aaron pressed.

“Do we really gotta talk? Sposed to be listenin’ for walkers.” Came the snappy reply and Aaron realised he was maybe pushing a little too much and overstepping the mark.

“Alright, Alright. I know. I’m pushing my luck.” He said, holding his hands up in surrender.

They pressed on until they reached the treeline. Fields stretched out in front of them for what seemed like miles, the view from their vantage point was impressive and ideal for spotting any approaching herds. Perching on a nearby fallen tree, Daryl announced that they should take a break and lit a cigarette. Aaron put up no protest due to his aching legs and feet after having walked for hours. He shrugged his backpack off and pulled out a bottle of water. After taking a few sips, he offered it to Daryl who simply shook his head. Aaron had seen this before. Daryl was never one to take food or water from anyone else, proving that deep inside, beneath the scowling and irritable exterior was a man who cared deeply about other people and held such a degree of humanity despite enduring some horrific experiences that it made Aaron wonder if this was what Lexie could see in him from the start.   

Daryl scanned the horizon, what would have once been deep green fields was now a barren wasteland of browned and beige squares with the odd walker shuffling along in the distance, not close enough to them to have been of any concern. He ignored it and diverted his attention. He thought of Lexie and wondered what she might be doing. Then, he thought of the shape of her body silhouetted against the candlelight in the room the night before. He could almost still feel her silky smooth skin under his palms and hear her feminine gasps echoing through his ears. He knew what it all meant, he had been there before. With Faith. He had connected with her and the thought of any kind of future without Lexie struck dread into his soul.

“She’s my girl.” He muttered, earning him a beaming grin from Aaron “You gon’ drop it now?”

“Yes, I will.” Aaron answered, satisfied with the level of information he’d been given.

Daryl spotted an area of stacked logs in the distance behind Aaron, as if trees were being chopped down when the turn happened and everything was abandoned. He could see a small mechanical digger and the possibility of finding some supplies. He nudged his head up in its direction.

“Should check that out.”

 *****

Carol pursed her lips as she slid the clip back into the gun, slapping her hand on the end to secure it in place. The clicking of the metal bounced from the walls of the silent armoury as Lexie watched from her desk. Carol rarely graced her with her presence having only left the compound once or twice since her arrival. This time, her interest in checking out a weapon seemed a little forced, as if she was finding an excuse to be there. Lexie’s suspicions were confirmed when Carol placed the gun back on the shelf and smiled warmly at her.

“Daryl didn’t come back to the house last night, I’m assuming he was with you?” She probed smugly.

Lexie reclined in her seat and positioned her boots up on the edge of the table, allowing her to rock gently back and forth. She didn’t know Carol all that well, but the older woman’s kind and friendly nature had been greatly received by Lexie in her most anxious moments when she had visited the house. She could see why Daryl got along with her so well and she couldn’t deny that her cookie recipe was exceptional. Her line of questioning would have angered her had it come from anyone else, but she knew that the only reason Carol had brought it up was because she was checking up on Daryl.

“He was.” Lexie replied.

Carol nodded knowingly, slowly pacing towards the desk and perching on the edge of it, looking down at her.

“It’s nice. You and him. I’m glad you found each other.” She said sincerely.

She could feel it rising, any efforts to stop it in vain, the words were travelling out of her mouth and into the room before she could even think about them.

“I heard him say he thinks he loves me last night. He thought I was sleeping.” She blurted out. Her eyes shot down into her lap and her palms became sweaty at the realisation that she’d just disclosed something so deep, so personal and so private to a woman she hardly knew, about someone who was probably not going to thank her for it. Carols eyebrows raised and her smile grew even larger. She wore a floral blouse and light blue pants which gave the impression of a stereotypical, suburban housewife, but Lexie knew better. She knew that really, Carol had been forced to do things to survive that most likely were not all that different from what Lexie had done. She cursed herself for being so careless, for feeling the need to confess such a sensitive thing without any control over it.

“I-I don’t know why I just told you that. Forget I said it. Please.” She pleaded.

“I’m not surprised.” Carol hummed happily from her perch on the desk.

“Yeah, that was kinda stupid of me.” Lexie sighed.

“No. I mean, I’m not surprised he’s fallen in love with you.” She corrected. “I know him. He adores you, it’s written all over his face when he looks at you.”

“Oh” Lexie grunted, taking her feet down from the desk and picking at the nail polish on her nails as she struggled to come up with a way out of this.

“Do you love Daryl?” Carol asked outright.

Lexie’s eyes locked on hers and she took a deep breath. She searched the far corners of her mind for an appropriate response. After a few seconds had passed, she admitted defeat and accepted that she was in this situation and having this conversation whether she liked it or not so she may as well try and draw some advice from it and be honest.

“I don’t know what love is supposed to feel like. But I do know I love being with him” She paused to check Carols reaction, a look of complete enthrallment on her face. “I um, I love how he makes me feel beautiful, I love that talks to me and that he trusts me. I love that he has no idea how handsome and strong he is. I just…I guess I don’t think I’m worthy of how he feels about me.” She answered.

Carol considered it was the most words Lexie had ever said to her and the subject matter being what it was meant that she would have to proceed with caution. She thought such truthfulness born out of a need for advice should be rewarded with just that.

“Lexie, Daryl is a complicated person. He’s not good with emotions and getting him to talk about his feelings, let alone allow himself to actually feel them after he lost Faith, used to be quite the task. But I’ve seen him change with you. Of course, you’re worthy of him, he doesn’t do this with just anyone. In fact, he doesn’t do it at all. But now he’s been able to move on from Faith and find happiness again, you gave that to him and that is a wonderful gift to give a person. If he has fallen for you, then mark my words you are extremely special to him and he will love you for the rest of his life.”

 ***** 

Lexie shoved her hand into the bowl, feeling around at the bottom and finding only crumbs left. Mel had eaten most of the popcorn and made no apologies for it as she munched loudly next to her on the couch. A magazine was curled around its self in her hand, her attention focused on a shallow article about how to appear wealthier while living a thrifty life. Lexie glared at her sister and rolled her eyes at the mindless and now totally useless content she filled her head with and picked up her book from the arm of the couch at the same time as thudding the empty bowl on the coffee table. Mel’s eyes briefly flicked up from the glossy page and checked the bowl really was empty before resuming reading the article.

The room was silent and Lexie hadn’t long been back from a guard shift, her eyes stung with tiredness and her back ached from standing up in one place for so long. It had been four days since Daryl’s departure and she had thought of little else all while trying to maintain her sanity and not give in to her anxiety and worry for his safety. She had kept busy with armoury shifts and wall patrols. Even volunteering to help Eric tend to the crops one morning to stop herself from sitting on the front perch and gazing at the house next door, wishing Daryl was sat in his spot on the porch, smoking his cigarettes. For two days after their first night spent together, her pillow still smelled of him and she struggled to sleep, the notion that it could be gone when she woke not sitting well with her.

But she had kept her control and composure during his absence and as she relaxed on the couch with her sister a soft knock at the door failed to strike panic and false hope into her. It was the same as any other knock and the idea that it could be Daryl, while being ever present, wasn’t resulting in her jumping from her seat like a bolt of lightning. Instead, she swung her legs from the couch and marked her place with her bookmark. Mel barely moved, only blinking and reaching for a blanket that was folded over the backrest of the couch. Lexie wandered past the windows, the thick darkness outside hanging heavy over the unlit parts of Alexandria. Her bare feet padded through to the hall, a long black skirt sweeping over the floor. She drew her thin, black jacket around her torso, clutching it closed at the front with one hand and reaching out to open the door with the other.

Daryl stood in front of her. His face and hands caked in dried, crusting blood. The deep crimson was the first thing she noticed, the forlorn and exhausted expression on his face was the second.

“Daryl” She whispered, lunging forwards and holding out her arms to him. He backed up, shaking his head solemnly and meeting her eye.

She could sense it. Something terrible had happened and part of her wanted to step back into the house and close the door, try to shut out the bad news he was going to deliver.

“You always come back covered in blood. Are you OK?” She asked.

“Yeah. Lex, somethin’s happened. It’s Aaron.”

Her heart nearly stilled in her chest and her skin pricked with dread. Unable to stop it, she jumped to the first and worst conclusion.

“Is he dead?” she croaked.

“No.” Daryl replied straight away. “No, he’s alive. We were attacked by walkers, outnumbered. There was a stack of logs at the top of this hill, I-I didn’t think, I shot the strap holdin’ ‘em together and when they rolled down the hill, they took the walkers out, but one of ‘em…” He rubbed a hand over his face, his expression pained and bordering on distraught. “…it caught Aaron, crushed his arm.”

Lexie’s mouth dropped open and she dragged in a slow and deep breath, her eyes blinking rapidly and the anguish rising in her chest.

“The Doc had to amputate.” Daryl added.

Lexie stepped back and gripped the doorframe as she tried to prevent her legs bucking under her. It was like Daryl was talking about someone else, surely this couldn’t possibly have happened to Aaron, her best friend, Aaron. Could it?

“It’s my fault.” Daryl uttered. “M’sorry.”

Her vision lifted but her eyes were glazed, glassy and shining wet with tears and disbelief. Daryl thought it was like she was looking straight through him, like he wasn’t even there. She ignored both his admission of responsibility and his apology, which spiked a desperation in him.

_I’ve fucked everything up._

“I need to see him.” She said under her breath.

“He’s with the Doc. He’s asleep. She’s had to use our best painkillers so he’s gonna be pretty spaced out for a few days.” He explained as he hazarded a step towards her.

She backed up further, collecting a pair of Mel’s sneakers from inside the door and slipping them on.

“I need to see him.” She repeated, dashing past him and leaving him stood alone on her front porch.

 *****

It was a sight that she would never, ever forget. Burned into her retinas just like the last sight of her adoptive mother before her death, the last time her father spoke before Mel had shot him in the head. It was now there with all the other traumatic and painful memories she wanted to forget and cherish in the most conflicted and complicated way possible.

The room was quiet except for the obnoxious beeping of a machine monitoring Aaron’s heartrate and for a few seconds, Lexie realised how lucky they were to be somewhere with electricity. Denise scribbled notes down on a notepad from the door as Lexie slowly paced into the room and up to the bed where Eric was asleep on Aarons legs. Her best friend was fast asleep, no doubt knocked out by pain medication. His arm, missing below the elbow was bandaged up well enough for there to be a lack of a single spot of blood anywhere, a fact that Lexie was extremely grateful for after seeing the state of Daryl stood on her porch. She knew the blood on his skin and clothes was Aaron’s and the thought turned her stomach. She gently rested her hand on Eric’s shoulder, rousing him from his slumber. He flinched and peered up at her for a second before standing up and throwing his arms around her.

Lexie’s chest felt like it might explode. An unexpected and powerful surge of emotion clawing its way to the surface, so strong she was futile in her efforts to push it away. A quiet sob escaped her throat as she clung to Eric and she felt him tighten his embrace around her as she squeezed her eyes closed and pushed her face into his shoulder.

“It’s OK. He’s alive. He’s alive.” Eric cooed but Lexie was now sniffing and trying to supress her chest convulsions from every breath she took. Eric stroked the back of her hair and hummed quietly to her. “It’s going to be alright. He’s strong, Lex. You know he is.”

She stepped back and messily dragged the sleeve of her jacket across her nose before wiping tears from her eyes with the heels of her hands. She took a deep breath and composed herself enough to meet Eric’s saddened eyes

“Are you alright?” She asked.

“I don’t know.” He replied with a small smile and a shrug. “I was beside myself when Daryl dragged him out of that truck, covered in blood. I was on the gate. I thought he was dead for a minute until he started to scream in pain.”

Lexie glanced down at a sleeping Aaron, his skin was pallid, his face ashen and slick with a coating of sweat.

"I thought I lost him, Lexie. I'm just so glad he's alive." Eric added. In response, she held onto his hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. 

"We'll get him through this." She said, summoning up some strength from somewhere. 

“I need to keep an eye on him, make sure he doesn’t get an infection. Our antibiotics are low. But all being well, he’ll be just fine. I mean, he’ll have some adjusting to do but you guys will help him with that I’m sure.” Denise expressed as she placed her notepad on the table beside the bed and shuffled towards the door. “I’ll let you spend some time with him, but he won’t wake up yet. He’ll probably be out of it for a few days. He went into shock too so he’ll be real tired.” She unclicked the door and slinked outside into the night, leaving Eric and Lexie to settle either side of the bed and plan how they were going to make life as easy as possible for Aaron when he was finally able to leave the doctors building and go home.

 

Outside, Denise found Daryl leaning against the window frame and watching Lexie with Eric and Aaron. A cigarette pinched between his fingers, his other hand was shoved into his pocket and his clothes and arms were still coated in deep red, dried and cracked blood.

“You ok? You have any injuries you need me to take a look at?” She questioned, edging closer to him along the front porch of the makeshift hospital.

“Naw. Just checking on him.” He nudged his head up in Aaron’s direction beyond the glass. “And her.”

Denise sighed and offered him a look of sympathy which he refused to acknowledge, his eyes firmly fixed on Lexie wiping tears from her eyes with the sheets that lay over Aarons legs.

“You shouldn’t blame yourself.” She told him.

Daryl’s line of vision was on her in a flash, his eyes full of fury and irritation. He knew what happened, he was there and he was sure of nothing else but the intense and damaging guilt that was raging in his heart like an inferno.

“Dudes lost a fuckin' arm.” He spat.

“It was an accident, Daryl.” Denise tried to assure him.

“Yeah. An accident that happened ‘cause of me.” He fumed, taking a long drag on his smoke before flicking it into the front yard and stalking off into the night.

 *****

For the next six days, Lexie and Eric took it in turns to keep a watchful eye over Aaron. He had woken from his medication induced sleep various times but hadn’t said much and merely shook his head in bafflement whenever he was asked what happened. Every effort had been made to keep him as comfortable as possible but his painkillers were so strong, he hardly noticed when he was cold or hot or hungry or tired. Lexie and Eric had been brought food by Mel every night during their vigil, even keeping to tradition with Spaghetti Wednesday. Visitors were kept to the bare minimum with only Rick and Deanna being allowed in briefly by Denise. 

Daryl had been out hunting every day and hadn’t showed up at the infirmary as far as Lexie was aware. He had made no attempt to see her and she hadn’t seen a glimpse of him since he stood on her porch wearing two pints of Aarons blood as some kind of macabre indication that he had literally dragged him back to Alexandria as fast as he could. Believing that she blamed him and struggling with the guilt he failed to push away, he had distanced himself from everyone and it made her heart heavy and her defences go up when she thought of the painful notion that he may well be pulling away from her.

What she didn’t know, was that he watched her sleep through the window in the middle of the night as he sat and smoked on the perch. He wanted nothing more than to go to her but his conscience was too poisoned by the notion that he was responsible for the pain she had been forced to watch her best friend go through. He wondered if she thought him as responsible as he did, if she shared the same opinion that he could have done something else, saved Aaron’s arm by making her a different choice. It angered him that he needed reassurance from someone else, even if it was Lexie.

Lexie hadn’t tried to seek him out, telling herself he was just allowing her space to tend to her friend and that eventually, he would turn up. Deep inside, she knew that a huge part of her failure to go to him meant she was protecting herself from the potential pain of heartbreak and so she had chosen to try and hold onto some of the control. But as the days rolled on and Aarons condition improved, she began to worry that she had put so much distance between them it might be difficult to go back to the way things were altogether and that there was the very real possibility that she really was losing him. For good. She missed him and found he crept into her thoughts when she was alone at night or sat beside Aarons bedside and allowing her musings to run away with her. Daryl not being in her life the way he had been since she’d met him was a concept too miserable and uncomfortable to dwell on for too long.

On the Sixth morning, Aaron was sat up in bed drinking coffee when Lexie arrived. It was the most alert she’d seen him and she had to stop herself from running to him and flinging her arms around him. Instead, she settled for a small kiss on his forehead which both Aaron and Eric seemed surprised at but managed to hide their reactions before she was able to pick up on it.

“So nice to see you properly awake.” She said quietly as she sat down on the opposite side of the bed to Eric who was clutching onto his boyfriends’ hand tightly. Aaron only gave her a small, obviously strained smile and took a gulp of his drink.

“He remembers what happened.” Eric informed her.

“Where is Daryl?” Aaron asked without a hint of wanting to discuss anything else. Lexie noted the urgency in his tone and wondered if it was because he was going to demand that Daryl explain his actions that day.

“I don’t know. I haven’t seen him all week. Mel said he’s been checking guns out every morning and not coming back until after dark.” Lexie answered, crossing her legs and getting comfortable, ready to get her book out of her backpack and spend a couple of hours reading. Sometimes she had even read aloud, in the hope that Aaron might be able to hear her voice and gain some comfort from it, where ever his mind was wandering.

“Can you ask him to come and see me, please?” Aaron requested.

Lexie had no idea where he was or if he was even inside the walls at this point. It being so early in the morning meant he was probably still around somewhere but she had no idea what to say to him, how to be around him or if he would even want to speak to her. But Aaron had asked her so saying no was not an option.

 

She got up and headed out of the room, striding out into the bright sunshine and scanning one end of the street followed by the other. Seeing hardly anyone except the gate guards and Spencer sat on Deanna’s front porch, waving at her sarcastically. She flipped him the bird, turned on her heels and adopted a decent speed as she walked to Daryl’s place.

To her surprise, he was just leaving as she arrived and she stopped at the end of the path to watch him close the door. He appeared to freeze on the spot when he noticed her before he shrugged his crossbow up onto his shoulder and slowly approached her.

“Aaron asked me to come and find you. He’s awake and talking. He wants to see you.” She said. Her voice was clear and to the point and he detected little to no emotion in it. It was like she was a stranger that had turned up out of nowhere.

“Um, alright.” He grunted.

She turned and followed the sidewalk back to the Doctors building with Daryl beside her. She could feel him look up at her a couple of times and felt the need to say something, anything to stop the unusually awkward atmosphere that had somehow transpired between them.

“Where have you been? I missed you” She enquired.

“Huntin’.” Was all he said. No admission of missing her, no semblance of interest in spending time with her. She wondered if this was the real Daryl or the Daryl that took over when he wanted to bury his head in the sand about something.

 

When Lexie reached the door, she paused with her hand clasped around the brass handle and looked over her shoulder at Daryl who was nibbling furiously at his lower lip. She wasn’t sure if she’d ever seen him so consumed by anxiety before and it wasn’t a sight that she liked. She wanted to reach out and brush his hair from his eyes and caress his face and tell him that he didn’t need to feel the way he did. But she couldn’t and she didn’t. She had no idea what Aaron was about to say to him. She lowered the handle and pushed the door open.

Eric stood when Lexie and Daryl entered the room and moved away from the bed, motioning with his hand to Daryl and encouraging him to move closer.

“Hey, Daryl.” Aaron smiled.

Lexie swapped a worried glance with Eric as Daryl moved across the floor at a snail’s pace and slipped his crossbow from his shoulder, reluctant to have to face the consequences of his split-second decision outside of the wall. Lexie saw his shoulders slump and she felt her bones jolt when the crossbow clattered to the hard, wooden floor. He appeared unsteady on his feet and she considered that he might faint for a fleeting moment. But this was Daryl, he’d seen worse. Then, her heart almost snapped into a million pieces when it dawned on her what was really happening. He was in tears.

“I’m sorry.” He croaked, shaking his head.

“No” Aaron said, reaching out and holding onto Daryl’s forearm. “No, this wasn’t your fault.”

“It was” Daryl rasped so quietly that Lexie and Eric almost didn’t hear it.

Aaron’s face morphed into an expression of pure sympathy and he sighed loudly.

“Daryl, I’d be dead if you hadn’t done what you did. There was a Walker right in front of me that was about to make me it’s lunch” He explained. Daryl hung on every single word but Aaron couldn’t be sure he was getting through to him. Lexie's chest began to constrict and heat built up behind her eyes. “I may have lost my arm but I’m still alive and that’s because of you. I asked Lexie to go and get you because I wanted to thank you. You dragged me for miles, threw me into that truck and the last thing I remember clearly is thinking we’d be back here pretty quick because you drive like there's always a cop in your rear view mirror. So no, I’m not accepting that apology because you don’t need to say sorry for a single thing.”

Eric caught sight of Lexie’s gaze dropping to the floor when Daryl sniffed and dragged the back of his hand across his face. Her chest rose as she inhaled deeply. He squeezed her shoulder and she gradually looked up at him with wet eyes, shaking her head in disbelief. Without her even saying a word, Eric could tell what she was thinking. She hated seeing Daryl upset.

“Thank you, Daryl. For not only putting up with my grandma driving and my chatter, but for saving my life. Again. I’m going to have to start a tally with a whiteboard marker on my fridge or something.” Aaron smiled, tapping his arm where he’d been holding onto it and raising it from Daryl’s skin.

Lexie looked back at him in time to see him take hold of Aaron’s hand and shake it. His head was still low, his hair obscuring his expression but she knew it would be solemn and he was bursting with emotions he would have no clue what to do with.

“I like having him around” Eric added. Daryl looked over his shoulder at him, his eyes bloodshot. “Thank you for bringing him back alive.” He offered a genuine and content smile which seemed to quell Daryl’s chaotic mind for a few seconds before he nodded awkwardly, collected his crossbow and headed for the door which caused Lexie to feel a stab of panic. She didn’t want him to roar off outside the walls on his bike before she’d had a chance to talk to him. Not only worried about the state of their relationship, she was now worried about him in general. He paused after opening the door and glanced back at Aaron.

“Glad ya alright.” He said, his voice barely there and his eyes still reddened from the tears that had tortured Lexie as she watched him cry for the first time ever. “Ya need anythin’, just ask. Both of ya.”

Before anyone could answer, he had vanished outside and Lexie was running after him. She saw him descend the stairs and throw his crossbow over his shoulder. His hands then went to his face, roughly wiping away the remnants of what was left of his sadness. The streets were empty but at that point, Lexie wouldn’t have cared if they were shoulder to shoulder with the entire community.

“Daryl” She called out.

He suddenly whirled around, his eyes flashing with anger and she stopped in her tracks.  

“What do ya want, Lexie?” He snapped.

“I-I want to talk to you, make sure you’re OK.” She stammered, taking a step forward. He returned the gesture by taking two steps away from her.

“Now ya wanna talk? It’s been a week and ya ain’t said a word to me.” He stated.

Lexie’s emotions drastically and rapidly switched from worry and concern to anger and defensiveness at the mere mention that she was the one responsible for driving a wedge between them.

“I was looking after Aaron. I was there all day, every day and you didn’t even visit him once! I’m sorry if my attention was elsewhere but you haven’t spoken to me either! You went out hunting every god damn day when you should have been waiting for him to wake up so he could tell you that he didn’t blame you! Because he doesn’t! Eric never blamed you and neither did I!”

A brief pause was followed by an intimidating stride closer to her. Bringing his face inches from hers, his piercing blue glare was enough to portray his pure frustration without the use of a single word. But he wasn’t going to stay silent. He had something to say.  

“Ya couldn’t have just told me that, huh? Been left hangin’ for a fuckin week while you’re expectin’ me to be a damn mind reader.” He fumed. Not waiting around to see her reaction, he quickly turned and stalked off in the direction of his house with a troubled and confused Lexie following behind. Reaching the front porch, he stopped, quickly moving around to face her with a fiery glare.

“I was there.” He seethed. “Every night after the hunt I stopped by that window and watched you read to him. I didn’t say nothin’ but I was there.”

Lexie said nothing as it started to dawn on her that her assumptions were not entirely correct.  Daryl paced back and forth as he tried to think, his thumbnail firmly clamped between his teeth. She watched as he occasionally stopped and stared at her.  

“Said ya missed me. You were right here, in the same place as me but ya acted like I didn’t exist. I sat on the perch and watch ya sleep because I missed you so damn much.” he confessed against his better judgement. 

Her eyes were growing hot with the rising salty tears that were blurring her vision and threatening to fall down her cheeks. She could have tried to fight it but it would have been in vain. It was unintentional and he would probably never admit it. But she had hurt him.

“I was looking after my friend. I -"

“-You ain’t his only friend, Lexie!” He interrupted with a raised volume “Been going outta my damn mind thinkin’ ‘bout what I did to him! Maybe if I’d done somethin’ else, anythin’… he’d still have his arm.”

“You did everything you could.” She reasoned.  

“Yeah?! Well, maybe I needed to hear that from my fuckin’ girlfriend a week ago!” He yelled, his voice resulting in her flinching and slicing through her soul like a knife through butter. She was sure that whoever was in the house had heard him, along with half of the street.

He grabbed the door handle and Lexie was spurred into action.

“Wait” She pleaded. “Please. Can we just go somewhere and talk?”

She was under no illusions that he wasn’t about to agree to anymore conversation. Not after having just yelled at her on the front porch. But everything in her urged her to try.

“Said everythin’ I had to say.” He mumbled as he pushed the door open. It slammed shut so loud that she jumped again and was forced to take a deep breath to settle her nerves.

 *****

Mel sat beside her mute sister outside the armoury a day later and rolled her eyes dramatically when she glanced up to see Lexie’s vision following Daryl as he walked along the street on the opposite side of the road without even a small peek in her direction. He held onto the strap of his crossbow over his shoulder and sucked in a deep drag of his cigarette, leaving a cloud of smoke in his wake.

Lexie had little choice but to tell Mel everything after she’d overheard Daryl yelling at her from the living room of their house next door and witnessed the loathsome tears and smashing of a coffee mug in the kitchen that had ensued afterwards. She stood, flabbergasted at the bottom of the stairs, her eyes moving from one broken piece of china to another before they crept up to Lexie’s face, twisted with bafflement and rage.

After another discussion about why relationships were not Lexie’s forte, Mel had finally managed to convince her to wait until both her and Daryl had simmered down and try to talk to him again. But as she sat beside her on the armoury, she could sense the apprehension practically seeping from Lexie’s pores. She reached a hand around to her back and gave her a decent shove forward. She stumbled and fired off a shocked look.

“Go with him.” Mel suggested.

Lexie bit her bottom lip and looked over at the gate that Daryl was now helping to haul open along with Maggie. Mel shoved her again.

“Go. Don’t be a such a pussy.” Mel insisted in her typically harsh way. "Go get your guy."

Lexie huffed loudly and feathered a hand over the gun in the holster strapped to her leg. She was already prepared to leave the walls, Mel knew she was going to be with Daryl and she didn’t have anywhere else to be. Finding an excuse was next to impossible. She took a deep breath and charged after him, asking Maggie to hold the gate open for her.

Believing he was unaware of her presence, she stealthily and as quietly as possible wound through the trees and over fallen logs and patches of dried leaves in pursuit of him. The hood of her dark green jacket was up, protecting her from the tiny, niggling flies in the air and the harsh sunlight that intermittently burned through the treeline and cast intense areas of warmth onto the ground. It also helped her blend in with her surroundings. Managing to hide behind a tree the one time he did stop and check behind him, she wondered why she was bothering to conceal her presence until she realised that she had no idea what she was going to say and needed time to think it over.

The left was empty, so was the right. Ahead of her she still couldn’t see him. She had let her gaze drop for a matter of seconds while she carefully navigated over a dip in the ground and climbed a small incline as soundlessly as she could, but now she had lost him. She whirled around, checking all around her and growling to herself in exasperation.  

A light clink from behind her had her spinning around in a split second to find she was on the business end of his crossbow. Her eyes focused for a second on the tip of the arrow in the flight groove, inches from between her eyes. Her heart hammered furiously in her chest and her skin prickled.

“You hate me enough to shoot me?” She asked.

He lowered the crossbow and tilted his head back, looking down his nose at her. She couldn’t help but revel in the warrior-like, strong and alluring sight of him before she had to begin a rather taxing topic of conversation.

“Why ya followin’ me?” he demanded.

“Because I want to talk to you and I figured the best place for that was out here, where no one can overhear us.” She deliberately kept her voice low and soft, non-threatening and indicating that she had little interest in a shouting match.

He sighed in exasperation and wiped at his brow with the back of his hand. She stayed quiet, giving him a minute or two and watching him walk around slowly, crunching over the sun bleached and dried leaves. He looked up at her through his hair from time to time and her chest grew heavy with each glimpse of his icy blue eyes.

“I’m sorry, Daryl.” She squeaked “you were right, I should have talked to you. It wasn’t just Aaron that went through it that day. It was you too and I wasn’t there for you.”

He didn’t reply as he continued to move across the cracked ground. His crossbow thudded against his leg with every step, clanking and distracting Lexie’s attention. It was as if he just didn’t care enough to hold it properly or wear it on his shoulder. His head was still low and his whole demeanour told her that she may well have lost his trust.

“I understand if you can’t trust me anymore. I came out here with this whole speech planned in my head but none of it really matters now. I just wanted to tell you I’m sorry and I never meant to make you feel like I blamed you or that you weren’t important to me. You are, you always will be.” She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, her thoughts jumbled and messy. Brushing her hood back away from her face, her hair fell across her shoulders. “Look, I’m kinda screwed up. I never got close to many people, they just end up leaving anyway.” She noticed how still he was now standing and could tell her words were penetrating his stone-cold exterior. “So, the truth is…I’m terrified that you’ll walk away. I picked up on you pulling away from me. You just seemed to disappear. So, I distanced myself before you could leave me.” She paused, searching her mind for something else to add but coming up with nothing. “I just wanted to explain that to you. I’ll leave you to hunt. Be safe.”

Admitting to herself that try as she might, she may not get the outcome she had wanted or planned for, she reluctantly turned away and began to step over branches and twigs, heading back to Alexandria.

“Didn’t mean to yell at ya.” She heard him rasp from behind her. It stopped her instantly. She slowly twisted around, her boots rotating on the ground. She didn’t know if there was more to it or if it was just the one sentence he had to offer, but she waited anyway. “I was pissed, but I didn’t mean to talk to ya that way.” She wanted to tell him that she understood, that she felt he had a right to, but she could see it in his eyes that there was more. “Wasn’t gonna leave.”

“I didn’t know that. I jumped to the worst conclusion. You went through something horrible and I’m sorry I wasn’t there to help you process it.” She said.

“Can take care of myself.” He shot back.

She fought the urge to scoff at his blatant and infuriating stubbornness.

“You hate that you needed my reassurance. That’s why you got so mad. Your feelings were at the mercy of someone else. I’m scared of abandonment and you’re scared of vulnerability.”

“I aint scared of nothin, Lexie.” He snapped.

“You sure about that?” She countered bravely, looking him dead in the eyes.

“Fine, If we’re head shrinkin’, why didn’t ya just tell me ya didn’t blame me?” He wanted to know.

“Because you weren’t there. You were out here… I needed you too, y’know.” She admitted.

It was true. She had needed him as much as he needed her, yet they had both embarked on a strange dance of avoidance and ignorance of one another’s needs. Lexie knew her lack of relationship experience was at play, but there was also something that ran much deeper. The need to run before she was abandoned again. She wasn’t oblivious to Daryl’s lack of understanding of his own feelings at times, figuring that in his past his emotional intelligence must have been a lot worse and it still reared its ugly head from time to time.

“Just got easier to stay out here.” He admitted.

“Aaron doesn’t want you out here alone and for no good reason any more than I do.” She wanted to go to him, to wrap her arms around him and tell him that everything was going to be OK and that he wouldn’t feel an ounce of guilt every time he looked at Aaron. But she couldn’t. “You don’t have to be with me if you don’t want to. But please, just stop hanging out with the Walkers out here.”

His brow furrowed instantly and the expression on his face was bordering on disgust.

“Ya think I don’t wanna be with ya?” He questioned.

“I don’t know.” She shook her head and shrugged one shoulder up, the heat from the sun shone down on the side of her face through a crack in the canopy above, highlighting her wavy, brown hair. To him, she was still a vision even when downcast and sad, even when the very idea of their entire relationship was being questioned, she was still stunning.

“You still wanna be with me?” he pressed.

“I wouldn’t have followed you if I didn’t.” She told him. She held out her hand and took a couple of steps towards him. His eyes moved from her hand to her face and back again as he pondered his next move. “I’m sorry for what I did, or neglected to do. I’m not so clever when it comes to this kind of thing. You mean a lot to me, I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“Ya didn’t.” He grumbled, taking her hand.

“Yes I did.” She corrected. “y’know, I think I’m lucky…to have you. Worked hard for you. I'd like to think you belong to me now, I don’t know why I would risk losing you.”

_Damn. I love her._

He fought not to smile, to keep his surly and stubborn persona but her now brightened eyes and affectionate gaze was smashing through the wall he had built between them at the start of the conversation. Before he knew it, they were both stood there smiling at each other like lovesick teenagers. He cast his mind back to the last night they spent together, how she gazed up at him as his hands roamed her body with the exact same dreamy smile she was using right now and all at once, their smiles were gone.

Lexie glared at him, her eyes levelling with his and her breathing becoming deeper and deeper with each passing second that his stare kept its ferocity. Her stomach flipped and her body coursed with a sudden and strange sense of desire while the pieces fit together, bit by bit she began to figure out what was happening and it wasn’t until he threw his crossbow to the floor and lunged at her that it clicked in her mind.

Daryl had felt it once before, that insatiable need to be close, so close that the world around you just falls away. He knew better than to just toss his weapon aside and embark on what was going to become one hell of a risk. Out in the woods without the protection of the walls and other people, just the two of them and their intense connection. He just simply didn't care. He would keep her safe, no matter what.

When he ripped her jacket from her body, unclipped her gun holster from her thigh and discarded them on the floor with his crossbow, her body froze and her eyes snapped open in shock but she was soon embracing his aggressive behaviour and she hadn’t taken much convincing. He seized her waist with both of his hands and crashed his lips to hers so hard she thought he might bruise her but she struggled to care. She moaned happily and managed to find the lapels of his leather vest, clinging to them for stability as well as to keep his body as close to hers as possible. Walking her backwards, she felt her shoulder blades smack against a tree trunk and after a flash of pain had subsided, allowed herself to relax against it while Daryl caressed her tongue and roughly groped her body through her clothes. Her head was spinning and she was finding it hard to fathom that a man as quiet and solitary as Daryl, someone who failed to mask his shyness the first time they had been intimate, had such a raging lust burning inside him as if a switch had been flicked. Stunned as she was, there was nothing that was going to convince her not to take advantage of this. She missed him. She wanted him and she loved how much he wanted her there and then, shoved against a tree trunk in the woods.

He plucked her tank top out from her jeans, pushing a calloused hand up inside her clothing, under her bra and harshly grabbing her breast. She caught his bottom lip between her teeth and it seemed to add fuel to the fire, the clink of her belt ringing in her ears as he unfastened it with his free hand and released the button of her jeans before working on his own. She slid her hand into his hair, taking hold of it in her fist and tilting her head back, he licked his lips and panted heavy breaths through his nose, revelling in her flashing him a dirty smile.

A wave of powerful craving washed over her when he nuzzled into her neck and nipped at her skin, rolling one nipple between his fingers which caused her to buck against him and plunge her hands into the front of his jeans. Everything from his waist down was crying out for some kind of contact and it was granted when she shoved his jeans down and curled her fingers around him, hearing him gasp a breathy curse word in her ear. His hardness in her grip only intensified and throbbed when he tugged her jeans down and slicked a hand between her folds, his fingers finding a delicious wetness that he was more than happy to take the credit for. Jolts shot through her and a quiet whimper left her reddened and swollen lips. He searched her face with his eyes, checking she was OK and was pleased to find her glaring at him the whole time his fingers slid into her and his thumb brushed her clit. When he withdrew his hands, she felt exposed and frustratingly empty for a few seconds when he took hold of her waist and turned her around, jostling her against the tree and kicking at her boots for her to open her legs.

Having never experienced anything of the kind against a tree in her life, she worried how this would play out and accepted that leaving the control to Daryl was the best option. So far, he had shocked and impressed her with his daring and dangerous actions but she had not felt one ounce of fear or anxiety from the situation and she couldn’t figure out if that was a good or bad thing.

After him smoothing a palm over the silky skin of her ass and making a grunt of appreciation, she felt his thighs against hers and fingers clasping her shoulder and easing her forwards. She blinked rapidly and tried to catch her breath only to be toyed with when he rubbed his tip up and down across her clit and entrance. He leaned over her, meaning she clung to the tree tighter and detected his fingers dragging her tank top strap down her shoulder, teeth replaced it, biting down on her flesh and leaving a cluster of small bruises. Then, he stopped. The sound of his shallow breaths in her ear was all she could hear.

“What’s wrong? Did you hear something?” She whispered.

“No. Nothin’.” He replied, his lips still hovering above her bare shoulder.

She could tell he wasn’t being truthful from the stillness of his whole body, still poised at her entrance he had no other reason to stop unless there was something wrong, or there was something he wanted to say.

“Tell me…Daryl. -”

She was silenced by a harsh, almost painful grip on her waist and Daryl’s lips ghosting her ear. He slowly pushed inside her as he spoke.

“Who belongs to who now, huh?”

Among her gasps of pleasure from him filling her and groaning as he did so, Lexie grinned at his reference to her earlier statement. She thought it may have been lost on him, but he heard every word. With one hand back under her bra and the other wrapped around her hip bone, he withdrew and slammed back into her. The sensation was a combination of spikes of pain coupled with a thrumming pleasure that radiated from her core. She dug her nails into the bark and held on with everything she had with each new thrust, each one seemingly deeper and harder than the last and the pace increasing until he was grunting in her ear and bruising her hip from forcing her back onto him. Before long, he was barely pulling out of her before he was already driving back in and her eyes were starting to roll back into her head. She was losing control, legs buckling and becoming jelly-like, the slapping sound of his pelvis against her ass and his masculine and strained groans were driving her crazy. She let out a breath she had been holding in a strangled growl that seemed to bounce off every tree around them. Daryl knew it was highly dangerous for them to be making this much noise in the middle of Walker infested woods, but all he could think about was claiming her. He ripped one of her hands from the tree and placed it between her legs, guiding one of her fingers to her clit and making her rub over it, coaxing her to orgasm.

“C’mon” He rasped at her.

It hadn’t been long, barely five minutes and she was already careering towards the edge, the physical part had a part to play but the thing that really turned her on was his new-found domineering attitude. She liked it and made a mental note to tell him once she’d had time to calm down and pull herself together.

It was creeping up, higher and higher until she let it consume her. She cursed loudly, followed by a long, drawn out cry that would no doubt be attracting Walkers. Her body began to tremble violently and Daryl was benefitting from it. He pushed deep inside her and held her there, pulsing with sheer bliss and riding his high at the same time as Lexie. She was whining and writhing against him, making him place his hand over her mouth and hold her still firmly.

“Fuckin’ missed you.” He panted at the side of her face.

She would have replied and said the same, but his fingers across her lips prevented her from doing so until he finally released her and let her pull her jeans back up. She slumped back against the tree after collecting her jacket and holster as she watched him dress and caught her breath. Quite unable to believe what had just happened, a small giggle escaped her and Daryl looked up to see her nibbling her thumbnail and grinning behind her hand.

“What?” He asked as he pulled the zipper up on his jeans and picked up his crossbow.

“Nothing, nothing.” She chuckled.

Daryl couldn’t deny he felt more than a little self-conscious about what had just transpired. He had found it a little hard to control once he’d given in to his base urges and he was encouraged by Lexie’s trusting and accepting reaction to it. He walked up to her and gently lifted her head with a finger under her chin. Kissing her lips tenderly and in the opposite way he had before, he held her head in both of his hands, ensuring she couldn’t move back away from him. She held onto his wrists and kissed him back with eagerness until minutes had passed and his lips finally left hers.

“I missed you too.” She whispered, brushing their noses together. "By the way, I like bossy Daryl"

Daryl smiled but his heart felt heavy and he knew it was because of the weight of his feelings for her and his inability to express it to her face. It was the perfect moment.

“Lex…” He breathed.

“Mmm?”

“…I-um...we should go”

 The words refused to come out and so he stood there and studied her lightly freckled nose and bright eyes.

 _I fuckin’ love her and I can’t say it._  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like bossy Daryl too ;)


End file.
